The details didn’t wholly banish Davi’s anger.

“What was I supposed to do?” I asked. “Let that poor kid eat dog food and starve? I wasn’t trying for a prize, it just kind of happened.”

“‘It just happened.’” Davi looked away, then sighed. “Well, let’s hope if things just happen to Byron and Kurt, that they make it back safely too.”

“What even is your prize?” John asked. “It looks almost like a crown.”

I touched my forehead. I didn’t feel anything, but a glance in Frank’s rearview mirror showed a glimmering metallic band. I couldn't take it off, couldn’t move it. My fingers passed right through.

I pulled up my interface.

Vincenzo Moretti

Novelty: 0 (288)

Abilities:

Powerful Blow (158.3*%)

Biological Augment: Sprinter (416.7*%)

Biological Augment: Reinforced Skeleton (391.6*%)

Biological Augment: Infrared Vision (383.3*%)

Biological Augment: Rapid Regeneration (433.3*%)

Healing Touch (400%)

Points: 6,376

Money: 42

Blueprints: (Focus to expand list)

Ruler Interface: (Focus to expand)

“I think it is a crown? Hold on a minute.”

I focused on the words “Ruler Interface” and a new menu appeared.

Ruler Interface

Subjects: 0/144

Vassals: 0/4

Point multiplier chance: 25%

Subject tax percentage: 8.3*%

Message subjects: 1/1 uses remaining (resets daily)

Subject tracking:

Grow in personal strength or acquire more rulership tokens to increase benefits to and from subjects.

“Yeeaaahh… Definitely a crown. It looks like if someone becomes my subject, they earn 25% more Points. I get a twelfth of the money they earn, though.”

“More Points? Hook me up,” Davi said.

Adding her was as easy as thinking about doing it. I tried to do the same to John, but nothing happened.

“Huh, that’s weird,” I said. “I can’t add John.”

“No, you asked me to accept you,” John said. “I just don’t know if I want to.”

“I’ll give you your Money back,” I said. “25% extra Points is nothing to sneeze at. Even if the amount monsters give doubles every twelve days, we’ll get each new ability a little bit sooner. Having an extra ability could keep us alive in a tight spot.”

“I guess.”

The counter in my interface ticked up from “1/144” to “2/144” as John accepted, looking glum.

Before I could interrogate him further, Byron and Kurt appeared.

“Praise Lord Jesus!” John exclaimed. “I was getting real nervous when you took so much longer than Vince and us. Was the fighting real bad in yours?”

Kurt shook his head. “The opposite, actually. Byron and I got taken to the same, um, arena, and it seemed like most of the people there were from the Albuquerque area! Six of them were military stationed at Kirtland Air Force Base, and they kind of… took charge.”

“Six people took charge of three dozen? They must be ridiculously strong,” I said.

Kurt waggled a hand. “Kind of? I mean, they seemed fairly strong, but as soon as they announced who they were, about half the people fell in line immediately. A few still fought, but it was four versus twenty.” He shrugged. “They didn’t have much of a chance. After that they spent the time doing interviews with everyone, trying to assess the area.”

“Who ended up with the prizes?” I asked.

“The soldiers and airmen,” Kurt said.

“I’m… surprised people just went with that. There must have been some really hungry and thirsty people there.”

“There were, but the military promised to get the Shops distributed fairly,” Byron said.

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“People trusted that?”

Byron shrugged. “Apparently, most of Albuquerque is doing really well. Leaders at Kirtland took charge of the area and have been distributing food and water. They’re planning to do the same for the rest of New Mexico, but apparently they haven’t finished stabilizing the city yet.”

“Wow! That’s amazing. Good news for Huntsville, right? We have a military base too,” Davi said.

Kurt, John, and I hesitated, looking at each other.

“Yes…” I said. “But…”

John shook his head. “It’s not the same. Sorry to say it, but it’s true. Redstone is… unusual. Less’n 2% of the people on the Arsenal are active-duty military. Under a thousand people out of the 50,000 who work there. I dunno how many Kirtland Air Force Base has, but it’s almost certainly a different kettle of fish entirely.”

“They might be able to do the same thing anyway,” Kurt said.

“They might,” John allowed. “Specially if people come to their support. I cannot believe people in that Challenge fought our troops,” John muttered.

“Hungry people will do anything,” I said.

“I don’t want to hear justifications from you, you damn monarchist,” John muttered.

I blinked, startled at the uncharacteristic vulgarity from John. That’s why he didn’t want to become my subject?

His grumpy comment drew Kurt and Byron’s attention to my crown, and after a hasty explanation, I tried to make them both my subjects.

Nothing happened.

“You’ve got to accept, guys,” I chided them. “Even if it’s anti-American to have a king.”

Kurt shrugged. “I’m not that patriotic. There’s nothing to accept.”

“Yeah, I got nothing either,” Byron said.

“Maybe you’re doing it wrong?” Davi suggested. “Did you forget how?”

We’d been sitting in the comfortable chairs of the local auditorium while we waited for the Challenge, and we were hardly alone. It was easy enough to find someone willing to become my subject. I added them easily, but I couldn’t add Kurt and Byron.

“Come on, guys,” I said, actually irritated. “This isn’t funny. The extra Points are important, and we need to find out about the new monster and get on the road. I don’t want to mess around right now.”

“I’m not messing with you!” Byron said. “I’d accept if I could, but there’s nothing there, dude.”

“Shit.” Kurt said. “Hey Byron, check your interface. I was looking to see if I was already someone else’s subject or something like that when I noticed something weird. What’s your Novelty?”

Byron stopped cold. His face twisted in consternation. “Negative-fucking-one? How can I have negative damn Novelty?”

“I don’t know, but negative numbers where they’re not supposed to be cause all kinds of programming errors,” said Davi.

“My thoughts exactly,” said Kurt. “That sucks. I could really have used the extra Points. I hope they patch this quickly.”

…

The aliens did not patch the error quickly. Worse, the error affected more than just the new Ruler system. Byron and Kurt couldn’t be detected or interacted with by a number of benign abilities - although they could still be healed, thankfully - and they couldn’t buy anything or input patterns at the Shop. We had plenty of time to test while we were stuck in Glorieta, because the new monsters were the nigh-unstoppable hexcrabs that had injured me during the Mandatory Trial.

It took us days to modify Frank to handle the new monsters. We’d already had fencing in front of the windshield to keep wostriches from being flung through, but we had to find more and weld it across the top to make the barricade into a full cage. Then, we had to find sheet metal to weld across our side windows, and add on more cages to protect our tires. Even that didn’t keep the crabs from punching holes in our walls and ceiling, but we could drive again. The delay hurt, but the extra time did allow for some truly critical exploration and experimentation.

Our sample hexcrab was actually very helpful. John ended up taking Analyze and watching carefully as Byron and I dissected the thing with a selection of chisels, scalpels, and hammers. We were able to locate several weak points on the underside of the monster, where a single stab with even my repaired copper-tip spear could pierce the carapace and end the monster’s life. Their joints were also comparatively vulnerable. Twisting them didn’t work well, but smashing them sure did.

Also, they were delicious when boiled.

Poisonous, yeah, but we could handle that.

“I can’t believe you got Kurt to use his ability for this,” Davi said, eyeing the pile of “toxic to humans” goop that Kurt had Cleansed from the leg.

“I had to promise him first bite,” I said morosely. “I know he’s going to take a big one, and we’re each only going to get a few mouthfuls since Byron won’t let me cook more than two legs.”

Byron ended up changing his mind, unfreezing two more legs after he tried his first bite. The flaky, buttery meat was too much for any of us to turn down when the alternative was Basic Rations.

“I wish I’d brought back all the hexcrabs.”

“You could have easily carried more if you hadn’t decided to piss off the big asshole,” Kurt said.

“Yeah… Maybe the deer thing tastes just as good.”

“Doubt it. Venison is okay, I guess, but it’s not this.”

“Well… that thing’s not really a deer, either.”

The deer was horrible. Loaded with toxins, and almost as bad-tasting as the basic rations. We did figure out a few better places to aim for. It was hard to tell what all the organs inside did, even with John’s analyze, but he could pick out the lungs and hearts easily enough, and both were located off-center in the monster’s torso. So, basically, as long as my aim wasn’t perfectly dead-on, a stab should kill one. My trident, while unwieldy, would also keep the monster from bodyslamming me.

The rams and wostriches both tasted decent - amazing compared to basic rations, but nothing special or noteworthy.

Shockingly, the pavemimics were one of the best things I’ve ever tasted in my entire life and not toxic in the slightest.

“When we get to the other side of this, I’m going to become a rancher. No. I’ll hire a rancher to supply me, and I’ll open a restaurant. I’ll serve pavemimic filets. Roast pavemimic. Pavemimic stuffie potatoes.” I waved a forkful of food above my head, then lunged with supernatural speed to catch the bite that fell off the fork before it could hit the ground.

“I don’t get it,” John said around a mouthful of food. “These are predators. Predators never taste good.”

By the time we were done with our culinary experiments, monster analysis, and truck modification, nearly three days had passed. We waited a little longer for the next monster to spawn, anxious that it, too, would slow our journey... but we were in luck.

The next opponent was the floating monsters we’d seen during the trial. Careful experimenting revealed that they were a pain in the neck in some ways, leaving behind clouds of toxic gas… but John had already taken Control Air in preparation for helping steer our planned airship. We were already prepared to handle the hazards they introduced.

Finally, we could hit the road again.