Chapter 14
“Burdens Bared”
Entity and Quartz ran from the Ianuae and could feel the cool breeze against their cheeks and the sprinkle of light rain lightly dampen them. The world they saw had shifted from dry, hot, and red, to cool, dark, and rainy in mere seconds. In a flash of light and a pounding of pressurized thunder, the Ianuae closed behind them, leaving the three stranded in a thicket of trees and shrubs with overgrown grasses that reached their knees. Entity clutched the queen in his arms and looked up to try and see where they stood. He could only see large conifer trees and the occasional flash of distant lightning to lighten their black silhouettes.
“I dunno if I know this place,” Entity murmured and turned his attention to Quartz, “fly up there and tell me what ya see.” He requested, getting a nod from the Ensanguined who spread her wings.
She leaped off the ground so quickly that the grass spun upwards. Climbing in altitude, Quartz flew to the top of an evergreen and perched on the very top to map the area around her. Her eyes intensified in brightness, and she could see miles of confider trees in nearly every direction with clusters of scattered downpours. She turned to the west and noticed a cutoff in the trees followed by an intense blackness only lit up by the lightning – revealing it to be a large ocean about six miles away. Turning east, she could see the forest span for miles before eventually fading into the fog, showing it to be a flat portion of the world. To the north, the land climbed and would surely lead to a higher elevation where mountains probably hailed.
Entity waited below and leaned against the trunk of the tree as strange exhaustion began to hinder him. Cariphae was by no means lightweight, and the fatigue of several sleepless nights had left the sorcerer weary. Something else dampened his power, and he couldn’t quite put a finger on it. He swore he felt his shoulder bleeding but there was no blood or wound that he was aware of. Perhaps it was empathy and pain from what he had caused the woman in his arms. He closed his eyes momentarily and finally took a moment to breathe deeply and slowly. Now that he was at ease, all he could think about was sleeping. The sound of beating wings and a hard thud to the ground snapped the man’s eyes open to see Quartz tuck her wings in and readjust her hood over her head.
“What’d ya find?” He asked sluggishly with an exhale.
“There is an ocean to the west. Mountains to the north.” She answered and noticed Entity’s fatigue as he held the queen in his tired arms.
“We’re not in Sheirun Hau or Faemira. Thank fuck.” He sighed and pressed his head against the tree.
“We need to rest. You look like you’re about to pass out. What’s wrong?” Quartz pointed out and watched Entity push himself off the trunk of the tree.
“We’re gettin’ away from this area first. If Guardian opens that Ianuae, all our holes are gettin’ resized. Let’s get to the shore and we’ll camp there.” Entity reasoned quietly as he began to amble into the thicket towards the west. Quartz followed and extended her hand.
“It’s at least six or seven miles to the shore, that is hours of walking. We should fly.” She tried to reason.
“I can walk that far just fine. I ain’t flyin’.” He stubbornly shook his head and continued to walk.
“Why not?”
“I feel fuckin’ drained. Either that or this woman weighs too much. Or both. Yeah, both actually.” Entity sighed wearily.
“Weak? I see no wounds.” Quartz did a once-over on her partner to check for any blood and could smell it on him. She assumed it was only Cariphae’s blood she was smelling.
“I think the Black Silk took some of my power when it burned away. I can’t feel my hand healin’.”
“Shall I carry her then?” Quartz asked and heard a soft laugh escape him.
“Ya act like I can’t keep up. I’m a fuckin’ beast, princess. I think I can carry this sack for a few hours.” He smiled and gave a wink to the Ensanguined woman who could only smirk.
“Stubborn.” She mumbled and bit her bottom lip softly. “Well, now that we’re officially traitors and fugitives to the three kingdoms, every Ensanguined is going to be after our heads. Guardian no doubt will be looking for us too.” Quartz crossed her arms as she looked down as if trying to fully take in the fact that she no longer had a place among her people. Anxiety gnawed at her stomach, and she felt her throat grow dry even in the humidity. Entity clicked his tongue and let a small groan rumble in his chest.
“Yeah, they will be.” He hummed.
“You’re not concerned?” She asked.
“Should I be? This isn’t new to me.”
“Does it not bother you that we have no one to protect us? Or that we’re on our own?” She held her hands out to catch the little raindrops in her palms. “We don’t have an army to fight back with. We don’t even have the right weapons to defend ourselves.” Quartz spoke almost in a panic before seeing Entity stop and turn to face her with a smile.
“Look princess, this may be new for ya but it ain’t for me. You’ve been cozy with a pack of snarlin’ wolves at your side your whole life; I don’t expect ya to know what to do, but ya made the choice to be here. If you can find enough independence to give your race the middle finger and stand up for what ya think is right, then you can muster up more of it to get your head in the game and survive. I’ve done it long before you were even born. This is what we’re doin’ now.” He snapped and held Cariphae out for Quartz to see. “And when she wakes up, she’s gonna have to face the same thing, so don’t feel like you’re alone.” He added before turning away and continuing his tread towards the west.
“How long have you been alone? Doing…this?” Quartz asked as she followed and stayed by his side.
“I wish I could remember. Years. Decades?” Entity answered.
“Do you think this ‘Captain’ could really help us?”
“He could, and he will.” Entity replied. “If there’s one guy more capable of keepin’ ol’ queenie here hidden, it’s him.” He reassured. Quartz tilted her head in a puzzled way.
“You know him?” She asked.
Entity paused and his eyes glanced around as if trying to think of how to answer, but ultimately closed them.
“Not personally, but I know from the stories that Guardian has been after him for years and can never seem to catch the old bastard. I dunno how he does it, but I’ve heard that he’s got a ship that can pretty much vanish in the blink of an eye. He also mans a crew of misfit survivors from Guardian’s old genocides.” Entity told with a shrug of his shoulders.
“If Guardian can’t even find him, what hope do we have? We don’t even know what he looks like.” Quartz skeptically argued.
“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. Right now, I just wanna get to a safe spot – preferably on a ship – and get her patched up, she’s bleedin’ all over my fuckin’ arm.” Entity groaned.
“A ship?” She asked.
“Guardian can’t do much over water. Besides, the closer we are to the sea, the better the chances of us findin’ the Captain.” Entity concluded and shifted his grip on Cariphae when she began to slip from his hands.
“We don’t have any other choice.” Quartz sighed. “How do you know so much? You’ve heard of everyone and everything, how?”
“When ya got no home, ya tend to wander around everywhere and notice a few things.”
“Being immortal helps too I imagine.”
“There’s no such thing as ‘immortality’, Quartz.” Entity frowned. “There’s just long life.”
“But you and I don’t age, that makes us immortal.” Quartz countered with a fingertip to her lip.
“That’s insinuatin’ that we’re unkillable.”
“Well…we aren’t unkillable.”
“So, we’re not immortal. No one is. That’s what your queens never understood, and that’s why they never bothered to fuckin’ learn a damn thing. They think they got forever to know a thing or two.”
“I don’t want to think that way.” Quartz muttered but perked up when Entity chuckled a bit.
“Ya don’t think like em’, sweet-teeth. That’s why I like ya.”
Quartz smiled fondly at the man with a small blush to her cheeks.
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It had only been two hours of walking and several miles across the forest in the rain before Entity stumbled to his knee and nearly toppled over, but he managed to catch his balance and stop himself from dropping the unconscious queen. Quartz quickly grabbed his arm and lifted him, watching him lean his head down in exhaustion.
“Entity!” Quartz gasped and saw him pull from her grip.
“Shit, I’m fine, I’m fine, I just need a minute.” He defended with heavy panting. Quartz put her hands on her hips and looked up to the sky.
“Well if you’re not going to let me carry her, we’re camping here then.” Quartz sternly put and pointed to a large pine tree with a decent canopy.
“No fires.” Entity huffed tiredly as he headed towards the tree. He was soaked head to toe in rainwater – as was Cariphae, but the ground beneath the tree was relatively dry and free of grass. Quartz, however, was still mostly dry from her cloak that had been sewn to be waterproof. She removed her cloak and helped Entity to the ground where he laid Cariphae down as carefully as he could. He then sat down and leaned against the tree, letting his arms drop to his sides. Quartz draped her cloak over Cariphae to keep the rain off her.
“We need a fire, Entity. Her blood is running cold and she’s wet. If we don’t get her dry soon, she will go into more shock than she already is and die.” Quartz pleaded, smelling the queen’s blood, and seeing the heat slowly leaving her. Entity sighed and pulled his hood off his head to run his fingers through his wet black locks.
“We’ll be seen if we start a fire and I’m in no fuckin’ mood to be fightin’ off little wood-dwellin’ shits. Fairies eat your toes in your sleep y’know.” Entity growled.
“I will keep watch – wait what? They do? Anyways, I can go without sleep a lot longer than you can.” Quartz defended and felt Entity stare at her skeptically – weighing his options and the only option he had was to let Quartz stand guard while he regained his strength.
“Fine. Think ya can get one started in this weather?” He asked and saw a smirk cross her lips.
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“I know I can.” She answered confidently.
In the span of about half an hour, Quartz had managed to collect enough wood and dry material to start a small fire using her dagger and a stick of flint she always had in her side pack. She blew the small flames gently and cupped her hands around the tinder to grow the flames into bright warmth. Entity watched her closely and lit a cigarette as he sat next to Cariphae with his hand on his blade’s handle. Fatigue caught up to him the longer he sat, and he rubbed his tired eyes. Quartz managed to get the fire going steadily and took a few steps back to examine her work. With her cloak covering the queen, Quartz had been soaked from the rain and took her long locks of white hair to wring out the water. The cold didn’t bother her as she was naturally a cold-blooded creature but admittedly hated the feeling of being wet.
“For someone who lives a cushy lifestyle, ya know how to make a decent fire.” Entity chuckled as he drew a breath from his cigarette. Quartz took off her boots and laid them next to the fire to dry. She then grabbed Cariphae and dragged her closer to the fire to try and warm the now-mortal queen. It was no wonder Entity couldn’t walk a few more miles; the queen was quite a tall and heavy woman compact with more muscle than she’d seen on most men.
“I spent more time outside than I did in the palace. I never liked being cooped up in a room with all that incense burning. It just gave me a headache.” Quartz huffed as she rolled Cariphae to her side to face the warmth of the fire. Entity nodded and took his cigarette between his fingers.
“Ya didn’t actually insist on avoiding escortin’ me to Destillion, did ya? Ya just wanted to travel and be around me.” Entity asked with a smirk and saw Quartz tense up a small bit. She hesitated to answer the question and left Entity in silence.
“I did, yes. I wanted to get far away from Sheirun Hau and maybe even see Faemira again.” She admitted and took a squat next to Entity against the tree. “I miss my birthplace. It’s where Virgoth found me.”
“So ya lied.” Entity took a drag of his cigarette.
“At first. I didn’t expect to have made friends with you. I tried to appear differently to you,” she leaned her chin on her knees and stared at the flames, “but you saw right through it. Or you just didn’t care.”
“Heh, it was a little bit of both,” Entity admitted and looked to Cariphae before motioning to her, “ya don’t seem too afraid of her now.” He pointed out softly. Quartz stared at Cariphae and examined how relaxed and human the queen looked which was far different from what the pictures and stories depicted her as – a scowling, snarling beast of a woman with fire in her eyes and her mouth open in a constant scream.
Now she lay limply beside her, blood running cold and a heart beating slowly. Quartz remembered such spite she held for the woman who killed the most beloved person in her life. Now that the storm had calmed and her eyes had opened to the painful truth of how fallen her kind had been, she wasn’t so sure how she felt about Cariphae. All Quartz could do was stare at her silently, trying to rebuild her views and beliefs as best she could.
“She’s mortal now, what harm could she do?” Quartz shrugged. “What threat is she to anyone now?”
“Don’t let the lack of fire fool ya. Even the heat of old coals could reignite another fire if ya ain’t careful.” Entity half-smiled as he put the cigarette between his lips once again and pulled his hood over his eyes. “Ya said Virgoth found ya. What’s your story?” Entity asked as he closed his eyes to try and relax.
“Do you really care to hear it?” Quartz asked as she poked the fire with a stick to help it grow a little more.
“I like to know who I’m friends with.” Entity replied simply and forced a smile out of the Ensanguined woman who felt touched by the reply. She waited a moment to gather her thoughts and memories and reached to feel the bite scars on her neck.
“When I was a child, maybe six or seven years old, the Red War had started. Faemira was ruled by mortal giants at the time. My mother was a giantess, but I didn’t know who my father was, so it was just my mother and I living on the side of a cliff, raising mountain goats. Queen Alana had just allied with Virgoth and he was turning the men into Ensanguined warriors. Some of them let the power get to their heads and started taking whatever they wanted in the villages. You know, food, women, beer, and the sort. They saw our goats and were feeding on them until there was barely any left. Those goats were our livelihood and my mother – being a grizzly of a woman that she was – tried telling the soldiers to leave us and our livestock alone.” Quartz explained and Entity’s head slightly lifted to see Quartz lower her own. She bit her lip at the painful and horrifying memory.
“They bled her, right there in our yard.” Quartz paused to take in a steady breath. “They ate the rest of our goats and took what they wanted from our home. I hid under the bed, and I thought they were going to kill me too. That’s when I heard Virgoth. He heard the commotion and came to investigate. I thought he would’ve left after punishing the soldiers, but somehow, he found me.” Quartz closed her eyes as the memory of Virgoth lifting the bed with one arm to find her curled up repeated in her mind. She remembered the pity in his eyes and the gentleness of his hands when he scooped her up into his arms. Without really thinking about it, she reached into her side pocket and pulled out a small, worn stuffed noep deer toy that looked like it had been patched countless times with a little tongue poking out and soft felt antlers. The toy was small enough to fit in the palm of her hand, though as a child, it had seemed much larger to her. It was a toy he had made for her long ago – knowing that it was her favorite creature in the land.
“He took ya in.” Entity concluded quietly and saw the toy. It occurred to him then that Quartz chose to spare the bloodthirsty stag in Sheirun Hau out of a passion for the creature since she possessed such a toy.
“He protected me like I was his own daughter. He took responsibility for my orphaning and gave me a new life after executing the soldiers for murder. At first, I was terrified of him, but I understood that he was different when he gave me justice. It wasn’t Ensanguined who killed my mother, it was men. Their hearts were already darkened, Virgoth just gave them the freedom to show it. Not even he could control what they did, but he did his best to uphold his beliefs in what Ensanguined should be and held people accountable.” Quartz felt a bloody tear fall from her face that she quickly wiped away with a frown. Entity nodded slowly as he understood the woman’s passion for the Ensanguined king and why she seemed so different from the others. Most importantly, he now understood why she was so determined to support her race.
“He was my father, even if it wasn’t by blood. I loved him with all my heart, and he was all I had left.” Quartz looked away with a deepening sadness. “My turning was his final gift to me before he left to fight her.” She motioned her head to point to Cariphae. “I had just turned eighteen, I promised him I would do whatever it takes to make him proud and to make sure the Ensanguined never lost their way, but I wasn’t strong enough and I had no experience leading anyone. I knew the kingdoms were corrupting but I didn’t want to face it. My people are capable of compassion just like Virgoth was, Entity, I promise you that, but our queens are misleading them. It’s not their fault.” She tried to justify and turned to face Entity. He simply shook his head and blew cigarette smoke from his nostrils.
“Quartz, if your people loved Virgoth as much as you did, they would be standin’ with ya right here, right now. Whether ya wanna believe it or not, Ensanguined have always been too thirsty to think about livin’ in harmony with others, it’s their nature. Power corrupts damn near everyone.” Entity breathed and he flicked the ash off his cigarette.
“Not everyone. It didn’t corrupt you.” Quartz tilted her head and Entity licked his bottom lip.
“Yeah, it did.” He admitted lowly, staring blankly into the fire.
“I don’t understand.” She spoke, but only got a hand from Entity to silence her.
“Ya don’t need to. Keep watch, scream if ya see somethin’ weird.” Entity shifted and crossed his arms over his chest with his still-lit cigarette in his mouth.
“What’s your story? I like to know who my friends are too.” She spoke and saw Entity shift in his spot. He didn’t speak for a few minutes and Quartz was ready to give up on prying for information. She understood that a man like Entity didn’t open up much as he’d been alone for so long. Respect was something she did her best to show – a trait Virgoth instilled in her passionately. She heard Entity rummage in his pocket for the silver box with lily pads and watched him place it on his knee.
“I don’t remember much, but I remember the pain of who I was. I was a blacksmith, I could make anything. I was young when I met her by the river.” Entity started as he rubbed his thumb over the silver lily pad etchings.
“Who?” Quartz asked carefully.
“Heron, my wife. She was a siren. Beautiful. Long green hair, green skin, ears like lily pads, and the legs of a frog. Heh, she was…somethin’ else. Shy too. Do ya know anything of sirens?” He asked.
“Only of saltwater sirens and their aggression. I know little of freshwater sirens, they’re so elusive.” Quartz replied as she scooted closer to Entity who found himself smiling softly.
“When you show a siren true love, they can walk on land like us, and they can appear so human. They gain their legs and lose their fins, but they’re marked. Heron’s spots were her mark. I promised to visit her every day and bring her food, and one day she walked on land to have our first kiss. I proposed to her right there on the riverbank. We built a house close by there together and I taught her everything I knew.” Entity squinted a little as he gripped his sword as if listening to something intently to remember as best as he could. His smile grew a little when he suddenly remembered a memory so pleasant that it threatened him with tears.
“Imagine my fuckin’ face when she told me she was pregnant.” He whispered, and Quartz’s lighthearted smile slowly fell when she realized where the story was about to head. She almost regretted asking him about his past when she noticed his smile fading.
“What happened to them?” She carefully asked and watched as Entity slowly clutched the silver box and bring it to his chest.
“Guardian’s Avacanev River cleansin’.” Entity’s face darkened and his eyes became covered by the shadow of his hood. “He saw Heron in our garden when he passed by our home. I was forgin’ a sword in our back shed and I couldn’t hear her, only the thunder. I couldn’t get to her in time before he– … he just…stood there and stared at me with nothin’ in those white eyes. No regret, no empathy, nothin’. He didn’t care that she was due any day.”
Entity’s hand trembled at the horrific memory of clutching his wife in his arms and screaming into her chest. He remembered the unbearable pain of burying her in the garden alone before setting his house aflame and leaving everything behind as he mourned a future taken from him.
Quartz felt a shock she had never felt before upon hearing that the man before her who seemed so lighthearted and carefree once had a wife and unborn child. He too suffered a loss greater than anyone could imagine, and she could feel her heart weep for him.
“I heard of a sorceress who could raise the dead, so I walked for an entire year to Destillion, and I begged her for the power to bring my family back. I swore to do anything for her, and she put the Black Silk Hex on my hand before givin’ me my power. It turned me into…this. I couldn’t bring Heron back. All I could do was make this.” Entity placed his free hand on the handle of his sword and Quartz looked closely at it.
“A sword?” She asked carefully.
“The pommel. I poured my best memories of her into it. It lets me hear her voice. It keeps me sane, it’s all I have left. I thought I could raise the dead and I discovered that I can only puppeteer em’ like some kind of child playin’ with morbid toys, but there ain’t any soul in em’. When the Red War found its way to me, it’s all I could do.” Entity corrected.
“The day your name was etched in stone. I read about it but the story changes from book to book. What actually happened?”
“It was a village of humans and siren hybrids by the river like my old home. Ensanguined and Valaah were fightin’ so close to it that the Ensanguined were usin’ the people as hostages. A lot of Valaah had died, and the battle wasn’t lookin’ to be in their favor. I could hear Heron’s voice and I couldn’t let more of her people die the way she did. I strung up all the bodies and I just let go of all control. Can’t kill what’s already dead. The Ensanguined were beaten in minutes and the survivors spread out to tell everyone what they saw.” Entity explained and pointed to Cariphae. “She heard what I did and came to the village to bury the bodies. She was a lil’ pissy about violatin’ the corpses with necromancy but was happy that the people were alive. Apparently, Guardian was supposed to evacuate em’. I gave her the bodies and she exempted me. It’s why I don’t have beef with her; she actually gives a fuck about people and she was more reasonable than most leaders. No pissin-contests, no insults. Just a ‘thank you’.”
“Entity, we will make Guardian pay for what he’s done, you aren’t alone in your pain.” Quartz consoled.
“I’m done talkin’ about it. I gave ya what ya wanted.” Entity pulled his hood further down.
“Thank you for opening up, Entity. I know it’s hard to do that.“ Quartz stuttered before lowering her head. “I’m sorry.”
“Men go mad when they can’t remember who they were. I remember just enough to know what I had and still, it drives me mad, even when I hear her sing.” Entity solemnly spoke before slipping the silver box back into his coat pocket. “As I said, princess, power corrupts everyone. Even me. I’ve only created more torture for myself and others around me the more I try and help. That’s why I don’t care to run a village or be a hero. I fuck up everything I touch. Speakin’ of which, take this.” He finished bitterly as he reached into another pocket and tossed the key with the red ribbon to her.
Quartz caught the key and eyed it closely. As simple as its construction was, it was very worn and unlike other keys she had laid her eyes upon. The red ribbon was particularly weathered with age.
“Guardian’s key? What does it unlock?” She asked.
“A really important door. He’ll be wantin’ that back so keep it safe. He’s gonna think I have it.”
“What door?” She pried but Entity simply waved his hand in annoyance.
“Kinda done talkin’. I feel winded.” He sighed.
“Well, for what it’s worth, I think you’re a hero, Entity.” Quartz reached a placed a hand on his foot gently. His gaze turned to her hand silently.
“I’ve done nothin’ to be called a hero. One act doesn’t make up for a lifetime of screw-ups.”
“You saved me, didn’t you? And you saved her. Endle still has a chance because of you. Give yourself some credit, because self-pity looks terrible on you.” She smiled and slowly stood to her feet. Entity slightly smiled under the cover of his hood and slouched against the tree to get comfortable.
Turning towards the fire, Quartz looked down at the little stag toy before clutching it to her chest. A part of Virgoth always stayed with her and she always remembered to tether herself to her humanity. His words echoed in her mind when she ran her thumb over a poorly stitched patch on the belly of her toy. As a child, she had pulled open the belly to ‘feed’ it and had instead freed it of most of its stuffing. She remembered how much she sobbed when she brought it to Virgoth and how much guilt she felt for ‘killing’ the toy he made for her. She remembered the way he tore a piece of his own cape to use as a patch and sewed the toy together for her.
Do not cry for a mistake made from kindness. Though a torn fabric will never be as it once was, all it takes is one stitch to begin its repair.
“One stitch.” Quartz whispered and glanced at a sleeping Entity.
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