Emil walked silently, his mind completely devoid of thought and emotion. He looked straight ahead and the Moon did not shine its light upon him. He didn’t even take care to take the more obscure paths after he was out of the forest, but no one was there to see him anyway. He reached his home as if someone else was in control of his own body. The two small cats were waiting in their usual place, but he went past without ever noticing them. He went on and unlocked his door. As soon as he stepped in the two were behind him and sneaked inside. He let the backpack drop from his shoulders to the ground and staggered through the rooms. Eon kept an eye on him from a chair, but remained silent. Emil collapsed into the bed and lay still for a while, face down and arms spread. He began convulsing, first weakly and with a long interval, but then they became stronger and more regular. Soon he was sobbing into the mattress. He continued for a long time, until the shudders began fading and finally stopped. He was completely drained emotionally and even felt physically tired. He wished for nothing more than to be able to sleep, but it would not come.
Pulling his hands towards himself he felt the knife stuck to his belt. He drew it, turned over in the bed and began turning it around, toying with it. Dark thoughts began entering his mind, but before they managed to develop into something more he felt something rub against his free hand. He lifted his head and saw that the two small cats had climbed onto his bed and were crawling towards him. He placed the knife on the cupboard and laid still. The two cats were climbing over his chest and neck. Eon who was silently watching all this unfold moved along the room and climbed a wardrobe. From the top he jumped off and landed on Emil’s stomach. He gasped and let out a pained and surprised noise.
“You did well.”
“I don’t feel well.”
“You don’t have to. Fell sad for a while. Grieve if you need to. But after that move on. You are nowhere near being done yet.” As it talked it walked along Emil’s chest towards his head. They were eye to eye. Eon turned around, hitting Emil in the face with its tail and jumped of the bed.
“I have some places to be. See you.”
“Bye.” As the cat left Emil remained lying on the bed facing the ceiling of the room. He no longer felt so horrible, but still somewhat empty on the inside and not willing to do anything. The two small cats kept climbing over him and playing around. There was suddenly a banging sound. Somebody was knocking at the door. Emil didn’t get up.
“Whatever it is will have to wait for another day,” he thought and returned to staring at the ceiling. The knocking came again, but Emil didn’t stir. After that came a moment of silence and Emil hoped that whoever was at the door had given up and gone away. That was not the case however as a moment later the door handle made a low noise and the door was opened. The two cats ran away and hid.
“Oh great I forgot to lock the door,” Emil thought, but raised his head only slightly to see who would come.
“Emil! Are you here?” The voice that filled the small rooms was familiar to Emil. It belonged to none other than her. Around the corner she came and gasped upon spotting him.
“Are you okay?” The black hair waved behind her as she got closer to Emil.
“Hey Kasia. I am fine,” was all he said and began leaning on his elbows to pick himself up. As soon as he was sitting upright she reached him and threw her arms around him so his head rested on her shoulder. His calm demeanour was crushed and in the embrace he trembled, but didn’t start crying. In a minute or so he regained his composure and Kasia let go of him. She examined his face.
“What happened?”
“I … don’t really know what to say.”
“I won’t force you, but please try.”
“I’m not … I can’t,” Emil muttered, at a loss for words. Kasia stared intently at him and he caved in.
“I’m not alive any more,” he said and averted his gaze. There was silence for a while.
“I see, but are you being metaphorical or …”
“No, I am actually dead.”
“Well to be fair seeing you now doesn’t make it impossible to believe it.”
“What do you mean?”
“Let’s see, for starters your face. Under all that smudged makeup and some dirt, you have a complexion of an actual corpse. One of your eyes is pale and scarred. You are cold, dead cold.”
“You seem to be taking it fairly well.”
“I suppose the reality of it hasn’t really set in yet. Also despite the supernaturalness of this situation I don’t see how panicking would help either of us. Perhaps all the fiction I consumed thus far prepared me to be able to cope even with this. I mean, if you attacked me as soon as you saw me, I would of course run in terror, but it looks to me like you’re still the same.”
“Thank you for reacting like this.”
“Thank you for not eating me,” they both chuckled as she said it. “Say, how long have you been like this?”
“It’s been pretty much exactly a week.” Emil told her about Eon and his compulsive tasks.
“That’s horrible, why would it make you do it?”
“Apparently it’s setting some old scores.”
“Wait how did you die anyway?”
“I’ll tell you that one a bit later. How come you came here anyway?”
“You were acting strange again yesterday, so I called up Tobi to get your address and came over. Hey Emil, what are you planning to do?”
“I don’t know yet, for now it seems all I can do is follow Eon’s orders and try to appear as alive as possible to people. I don’t fully understand all the things that are different for me now, but I think I won’t push my luck too much.”
“Probably smart. So I’ve said something like this before, but seriously now I want you to count on me more. Even if it’s something simple like helping you with the makeup or something or one of the tasks that you get. I might not be able to do much in that case, but I can at least hear you out and give my insight.”
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“I will very likely take you up on that. For now I would like to ask you to not tell anyone about this.”
“Naturally.”
“Even Tobi.”
“I understand. I think that he would be okay with it though.”
“Perhaps, but I think that perhaps even telling you was a mistake. What if I put you in some kind of danger because of this?”
“I’m glad you told me regardless. I will help you the best I can. Wouldn’t you help me if our roles were reversed?”
“I guess I would.”
“Well there you go. Did you get your second task yet?”
“No, Eon just left, so maybe he is gathering information for it as we speak.”
“What will you do now?”
“I will go back to the forest and clean after myself. I left some gear and some obligations behind me.”
“You will bury the foxes?”
“Yes, if some scavenger hasn’t made off with them already. There was another thing,” Emil lowered his voice and looked around the room. “There was a fox cub among them that I left alive. He wasn’t among the foxes that Eon told me to kill, so I didn’t. I fear though that it will die since it was left alone. I will take food to it.”
“Can I come with?”
“I think it’s better that I go alone.”
“Come on I’ll let you use my shovel.”
“You have a shovel?”
“Yes, I have some camping gear at my place. We can go get it at once.”
“All right we will go together.” Emil went to the fridge and took out some of the already cooked meat. As he was putting it into a bag the two cats came running in.
“Ooh kitties! I didn’t know you had them. Or rather I was sure since you kept having those problems.”
“They are strays. I started feeding them after I died.”
“Come here kitty,” she crouched end reached towards the cats. They hissed at her and hid behind Emil.
“They are not used to people. They only got used to me today.” Emil set some food for the cats and took it outside. The cats followed and started eating.
“Let’s go get the shovel,” Emil said, took his backpack and filled it with meat.
“Wait!”
“What is it?”
“We need to do something about your face first. Do you have any makeup at hand?”
“Yes, there should still be enough,” he replied and took out the box. He laid it on the table and Kasia examined it with intrigue.
“It’s an impressive amount. I mean I didn’t take you for someone who’s into makeup.”
“I met somebody who helped me with the basics of being dead?”
“Another one like you? Who was it?”
“I don’t know if it’s a good idea for you to know too much. But yes it another one like me.”
“I don’t think it will make much difference at this point but fine, I won’t push you. Let’s get the makeup over with.” She examined all of the contents of the box and began working on Emil.
“For the scar you need to use …”
“Yes I know, I have enough experience with makeup. You know if you became a goth you could save a bit of money on the makeup.”
“I will pass on it for now.”
“There we go all good. Now we can go.” They walked together towards Kasia’s house. For a time they went in silence until it was finally broken by Kasia.
“So, what’s it like?”
“Being dead?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t eat or sleep, I am under Eon’s command and there are some gatherings for the dead, where I am called to from time to time.”
“So you saw a lot of others who are dead?”
“No we all wear masks. We play music and drink some weird stuff.” They reached the house and Emil waited outside while Kasia retrieved the shovel. It was a small folding shovel and it fit perfectly inside the backpack.
“You know, you might see some disturbing things if you come with me.”
“I know, I will go with you regardless.”
“Thank you.”
“I said I am here for you. Now let’s go.” The duo made their way towards the park. It was before midday and the park was filled with all kinds of people, enjoying the weekend. In the crowd the two of them didn’t stand out. On the path to the forest the number of people dwindled. Once they reached the stream not a single soul was in sight any longer.
“I don’t think I’ve ever been this deep in this forest before,” Kasia said and huffed, slightly out of breath.
“I only started coming this way recently as well. Let’s take a short break here.”
“Great idea.” Kasia went and put her hands in the cold water. She gave a sound of relief. After a couple of minutes they carried on through the woods. Emil attempted to avoid most of the thorns and difficult undergrowth, but the way was still not easy.
“We are near. I am warning you, it won’t be nice.”
“I’m ready.” It wasn’t long before they reached the area where Emil had set the traps. There were pieces of paracord lying around and water canisters. He ignored them and went straight towards the hole where the fox cub hid. He pulled out the food that he brought and began throwing pieces inside the hole. He left some outside and threw some down other nearby holes. He never saw the kit, but hoped that what he did might help it survive a while longer. The next thing he wanted to take care of were the dead foxes. He looked around and found the corpses piled together as he had left them. He heard a small gasp as Kasia noticed the grim display. He unfolded the shovel and got to work. He found a spot of soft ground and began digging. He thought that a grave for the three foxes would be a quick and easy job, but it ended up taking two hours and the hole was still not very deep. While he was digging Kasia gathered all the paracord and canisters and emptied them.
“I can’t believe how long it takes to dig a hole. I thought I would be done in about half of an hour.”
“Yeah I suppose it would have been better to get a bigger shovel.”
“Perhaps, but it would be weird to walk around with it through the city.” Emil put down the shovel and walked towards the fox carcases. He picked one up. It felt strange in his hands as it was completely rigid, despite being bent in an unusual shape. He carried his victim to the hole and lowered it in. With the second one he needed to be careful, since the head seemed to be barely attached to the rest of the fox. Soon all three were joined together. Emil began burying the foxes and Kasia watched silently over him. After the dirt was back in its place he knelt over the grave.
“I’m sorry,” he said with his hand on the dirt. He stood up and began flattening the dirt. After he was done he placed a large stone in the middle and covered the rest in smaller stones and leaves.
“Well then,” Emil said as he turned around and began picking up the pieces of paracord.
“You okay?”
“Somehow I feel lighter on my feet. I am still fairly tired though.”
“I thought you didn’t need sleep.”
“I don’t. It just means I will be going to one of those gatherings I told you about.” He tied the canisters together and put the rest of the paracord in the backpack. He hung the former over his shoulders.
“Let’s go back.” They walked back with lighter hearts and took a couple of breaks, talking all the while. At the stream Emil took off the canisters and put them into a thick patch of ferns. Kasia looked at him with a questioning gaze.
“I’ll be back for those at night. I don’t want to attract too much attention to myself.” They continued together to Kasia’s home. Emil handed her the shovel.
“Thank you for trusting me with all this.”
“Thank you for supporting me regardless. Bye.”
“Take care.”