His son? He didn’t look that old, to have a family! But a black-curled teen ran in. “Fa? What is this?”

“Ask nae questions. We help our Farley share all his memories. Some are very painful. Are you well? I can nae hold them from your mind--”

“I took many diplomats’ reports for you--”

“When did you this?” His fear rumbled on me!

“You gave me your Diplomatic Link. It is well, to be able to help our people--”

“Ejis faea naea! Were you 12, when I gave? Can one so young bear?”

How do you forget giving the Diplomatic Link to someone? Farley gave it to me, after my failed Challenge. He was angry that it was a lot harder than a Zheien’s Challenge would be, and he didn’t get independent work because we had to share it, all of our Team.

Cevit Ion felt his head and smiled. “O, he bears as well as my adult diplomats! He is well for this, Konomai. I am happy he chose healing and nae diplomatics--”

“My liege, we need more diplomats! So many return injured and we must send them again.” His eyes turned darker red-gold.

“O, I sent help for them. All may rest, while they are here. Soon Pirad will clone them, and when we have clones who choose their work, they may all go home. Are you well, Konomai? I wish to help Ella, for he needs her when he finishes.”

“I am well, Liege. O, eae yeo!” He waved and held a purple cylinder. “Farley, I dread to cause you pain, but will you share pleasant memories with me? Think of your birth, my son.”

Antomias, a friend of Farley’s who was too injured to see any of ‘em in Rainbow, ran to Fa. He laid on a table shivering, in a group of six. So good to see him healthy! If he’s healthy. Maybe he’s projecting a ‘well image’ like Farley did.

And I laid on my table with five me’s quietly breathing. Sleeping. But none of ‘em were overweight like me. I smiled. We’re sextuplets, and they’re all grown! I wondered how my family would take this. Can we tell ‘em? One of us looked like me and none of the others did.

Same with Farley’s five. One, an exact twin. He’s five-fingered! They’ll stay on Earth? My family died out here. I shuddered.

Cevit Ion lowered a purple cylinder. It burned like a hot coal! But, I watched my birth. Happy parents. They looked so young. Not now! Daddy went silver early. So did Mama. This stressful life! I grew up with frazzled Mama, struggling to keep up with us all. Josephine came when I was 2. As we grew, I got her to come with me and we ‘helped’ Mama. I think we made more messes for her. Poor Mama! Especially when Karl came. He was a very hyper two-year old when Rose was born. We had to watch him. He made Jo cry when he stomped all her Barbies. She still has all the pieces.

Mama got pregnant again when I was 8. This one was very sick. I tried to help, but hyper Tommy nearly made us all insane. A genetic problem made him not feel pain. He did things and hurt himself, over and over. Broken bones, concussions, and he laughed through it all. Since he didn’t feel pain, and he was profoundly retarded, he was always hitting us, poking us, or cutting us. One day he ran out in front of a car and that was it. The poor lady killed herself because she couldn’t handle killing a child. He was only 2 and Mama was pregnant with Allison. She came when I turned 10.

Allison was perfectly normal, and a quiet child. I loved taking care of her. Daddy finally got therapy. All of us did. We learned to live a normal life again, though we all missed Tommy.

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They got brave and had Millie. She was also quiet, but very intellectually disabled. Down’s Syndrome. I was 12. She and Allison were really close. Allison was too young to understand why, when she started kindergarten, Millie had to go to a different class.

Jo tried to help, but the others didn’t listen. Especially my daredevil brother Karl, who never let her have a minute’s peace. Middle school kept me pretty busy, and my sibs just got older. Jo made straight A’s and went in honors programs. Worried that her A’s weren’t high enough. Karl never calmed down, but when he started baseball, that was his obsession. Quiet Rose started school and I noticed her crying a lot. Karl broke all her art projects. I finally stomped his prized Batman special edition Hot Wheels.

He cried. “What’d you have to do that for? I can’t ever get another one like that!”

I waited for him to calm down. Quietly told him how Jo cried over her Barbies, how Rose mourned her unicorn that won First Prize in the State Of Georgia in a competition, a beautiful thing, and my tea set that Aunt Eleanor gave me before she died that he broke when he was mad at me. “Have you ever lost anything that you loved?”

“Yeah!” He stomped his foot. “Tommy! I wish I had another brother!” He cried and I held him.

“We all miss Tommy. But he couldn’t learn to be kind. You’re normal. You can learn.”

After that, he did get better. Still drives us crazy, but he doesn’t break anything of ours, now. We all made an effort to do boy things with him. Play with his cars on the floor. Run races in the back yard.

Millie decided she needed to do that, too, and we worried. Her cardiologist said we absolutely couldn’t let her run. So I brought home a wheelchair from the second-hand store. When we wanted to run, I strapped her in and ran her in it. But even that was too much. We lost Millie when COVID got bad last year. Allison’s not the same. That’s when she stopped talking. Rarely, she says something to me, or Jo, or Rose. Mostly she stays in her room to do art, and her teachers complain she doesn’t do her work. Society gives you 2 weeks to get over a death in the family. Our therapist said, 6 months to 2 years. Can’t they cut Allison some slack? Jo? Rose?

Since then, nothing cheers poor Jo up, or Rose, either. I started high school worried about them, and middle school made both of ‘em much worse. After COVID, Karl got even more hyper without his baseball team. Started teasing my sisters more.

And, this year, things got so much more hectic. Less time to talk—but I spent all that time on my Ham set and I try to talk to my sisters and Karl interrupts and makes fun of us. At least Daddy bought him that basketball hoop. I use my Ham equip when he’s practicing or sleeping. But I don’t get enough sleep--

Memories I didn’t want to see kept going. Jo and Rose ended up in Daddy’s car off the side of a mountain in Northeast Georgia. They said it was slick roads. We found a suicide note and both of them planned that. Our family’s dark secret. We didn’t find the note right away.

Karl got into drugs and died of an overdose. His Elshar friends came for my parents one night. I’d just left on my first respite from Sigan Mas that I spent with my family mourning my sisters. Karl OD’s the day after I went back to Farley’s ship. My parents vanished a day later. After that I was too scared to stay in touch with other family members. Did I think my HamFest friends were safe from our enemies? Maybe I wasn’t all there after so many injuries.

I relived all of our time at Sigan Mas, every face, every person we tried to save, every time waking up in the Infirmary, wondering if slavers—did things to us—and just working, working, working so we didn’t have to think.

My Challenge was awful, and I felt as if I really did get raped. Farley barely survived his, that we experienced together, a simulated horror mission.

He went home and wouldn’t let me come, and that worried me. I went to Earth and there was a HamFest that weekend. I stayed with a diff new friend every night. Exciting. I lived all over the world, went places, just tried to forget.

Farley came back and kept dark eyes. Our missions got harder. Treaty signings. Only the best diplomats even get those. We lost Team members. Farley aged. Then, that last disaster mission. He almost got Rhaech, when Kenneph went, that wizard diplomat from MarKu. When Kenneph signed his treaty after three hard years of work, we were still in Sigan Mas. I didn’t know they almost sent Farley until six years later, when he had a nightmare about it. And, that nightmare stopped his heart. My future memories ended there.