Fluttering my mouse over South America, I gaze at the options available to me. Brazil, Argentina? Too easy, can transform into a Great Power too quickly. Uruguay? Seems a little too dull. Paraguay? I hovered over the nation with interest and studied the following statistics. Looking at the population, I saw the massive amount of soldiers.

Alt-tabbing, I did a quick Google search and did a cursory glance at Paraguay's history and its upcoming wars. Paraguayan War? Man, that's brutal as hell. I salivated off the opportunity to cause massive casualties to their enemies. Yet I quickly put an end to such military fantasies as I remembered the stupidity of the AI, rendering my victories nought.

Crossing the Pacific with a simple mouse drag, I gaze over the numerous nations in Asia. Not another Asia campaign again, I mentally huffed as my gaze lingered over the tiny Bornean republic of Lanfang. Uniting China with that was challenging, but damn, it was fun.

Dragging to Europe, I sighed and blinked, having that same crystal clear image of the map of Europe in 1836 in my eyes. The United Kingdom was out as they're number one. A French Empire campaign might be fun, but I don't feel like playing France. And Prussia to Germany campaign was something I play too often!

Finally, I dragged to the continent of Africa and looked at the sparse "nations" of the region. Sokoto CALIPHATE? I quickly looked through the details of the nation in the centre of Africa. Alt-tabbing once more and searching through Google, I returned to the game. The strategy was simple, conquer territory to the South until the ocean was reached. Wait for Europeans to show up and westernize and kick them out of Africa. The plan was so simple, so drastically simplistic, that the fervour of playing the nation deflated.

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Looking to the South, I could see the red blob surrounding the Cape of Good Hope belonging to the United Kingdom. Looking at the northeast, I set my sights on the Zulu tribe. Ahhh… I have heard of something about them being fierce conquerors. It was powerful, selecting it and comparing its statistics with the surrounding nations, yet it was uncivilized according to the game. Let me repeat once again; the game thinks it's uncivilized, not me. Transvaal and Oranje republics caught my eye as they were civilized. These republics were far inland and surrounded by African nations. They had few soldiers, and the surrounding African countries could crush them easily.

My curiosity about the two republics' origins grew as I checked the nations' populations. Afrikaners? And they're a minority within their countries? Biting my lip, I alt-tabbed once more and looked into the information on these two republics. The Dutch, the VOC or Vereenigde Oostindische Compagnie, The Great Trek, the Battle of Blood River, and all the historical events flooded my eyeballs. I endlessly scrolled through every Wikipedia article. It ended with a crescendo as I read on the topics of the Boer Wars, bookmarking a couple of notable books on the subject of my to-read backlog and finishing up with their incorporation into the Union of South Africa.

I salivated as I thought of how to rewrite history for my next campaign. In the timeline I planned to forge, it will be the British leaving Africa, and the Afrikaners will unite Africa under a great union.

Still, I was curious about the origin of apartheid in South Africa, so I began reading up on the subject matter and realized what my ambition meant.

It's just a game. I thought to myself, shrugging my shoulders as I looked at the time. It was time to sleep, and I shall enact my plans tomorrow morning.

Yet somehow, the tomorrow I was greeted with wasn't the bright sun shining through the window. No, I had entered the strange realm of Elfrica, a high fantasy version of our world's Victorian age. Where the elves roam in the environment, chasing the human occupiers off. Where the dragons act as glorified volcanoes, armies must manoeuvre around, never into, lest they invite its rage. And finally, where mermaids rule the oceans, subjugating all travellers with a tax.

This may all sound great, but I'm not someone who met gods or received some gifts. I even have to learn Dutch! Fuck! If I want to be sent to another world, please make me overpowered and let me have a peaceful and relaxing life. But of course not!

Authors Note: Got bored waiting to play a Boer campaign on Victoria 3, so decided to write some Victorian fantasy. I won't be able to promise to get historical facts right, but I'll do the best I can with Wikipedia.