Lian was furious and heartbroken all at once. Never before had she fought so heatedly with her father. She’d never faced death before either and that realization made her want nothing more than to be comforted by him. This was all too much for her, too serious, too daunting. Then her pride whispered scathing words in her mind, stoking her temper to new heights.

She paused, on the verge of reaching to open her bedroom door, a teary frown darkening her visage. It would be easy to find Taoru and apologize to him, but Lian wasn’t ready to have that conversation. She regretted the harsh things she’d said, but wanting to protect her home wasn’t wrong. What good was her magic if all she did was hide it away? Shouldn’t she want to help?

Her hand dropped to her side and she turned her back on the door, leaving it sealed shut. She crossed the room and sat down on the edge of the bed, fully aware that she was wallowing. For what felt like hours, she remained there with silent tears rolling down her round cheeks. Once or twice she swiped at them, trying to brush them away and compose herself, but then a fresh wave of frustration or sadness would hit her and the crying returned.

Eventually, she laid down, her head at the foot of the bed and found herself drifting off to sleep. Exhaustion from the tumultuous day won out over her anger and pride until she was just on the verge of unconsciousness.

“Lian?” Taoru’s strong voice came through the door and instantly she was alert. “Lian, I brought you dinner. May I come in?”

Emotions warred within her, making her stomach feel twisted and queasy. Silence stretched on. Her mouth was dry and her tongue wouldn’t work. She didn’t know what to say, whether to invite him in or continue to stew. In the end, she couldn’t decide and instead sat there, waiting to see what he would do.

“I understand,” Taoru called a couple moments later. “I’ll leave it out here for you.”

Moisture stung her eyes, but she remained frozen and mute until long after Taoru’s steps had receded from the door. Minutes passed before she finally moved and all she did was wipe her nose with the sleeve of her dress.

Only when Lian could no longer ignore her hungry belly did she get off the bed to retrieve the food. Guilt lashed her insides as she gathered the tray and sat back down to eat. She was supposed to have cooked dinner tonight and because of their argument it had fallen to Taoru. She sniffed, trying hard not to cry again.

The rice and fish tasted like ash in her mouth as she ate. She wasn’t deserving of it, but her body needed the nutrition and she didn’t want to hurt Taoru’s feelings any further by refusing it.

A tap came at the window. It took her a moment to realize it wasn’t a tree branch or the wind, but a pebble. Setting her dishes aside, Lian strode over to the window and propped it open tentatively. Just as she did so another small rock bounced off the side of the house, then disappeared into the grass.

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“Who’s there?” She called into the darkness, her golden eyes narrowed suspiciously. Was this for real? Who would come all the way out here to throw rocks at her window?

She got her answers a moment later when Captain Juzo stepped out of the inky shadows and up to the opening. “Sorry to intrude, Lian.”

“Juzo? What do you want? If my father—”

He raised his hands to quiet her, then offered a sheepish smile. “I know, this is insane, but I had to see you…” He blushed and dropped his gaze. “I know your father didn’t give me permission to call on you, that’s why I’m sneaking around.”

Lian rolled her eyes, thinking his infatuation annoying more than anything, but she didn’t want to say that. She had other things on her mind and it wouldn’t serve her purpose to push Juzo away entirely. At the same time, she didn’t want to lead him on, and so she would have to walk that line carefully. “He’s very protective,” she stated, her anger covering the guilt she felt.

“He is.” Juzo gave a quiet laugh, rubbing at the back of his neck nervously. “He’s a bit frightening, too, if I’m being honest.”

Pride blossomed in Lian’s chest. There was a reason a kind sculptor like Taoru was intimidating to someone like Juzo. Not that she would ever give away her father’s magic to the captain. That was far too dangerous. She didn’t trust Juzo as far as she could throw him. “So, if he’s so scary, why are you here again?”

To her surprise, Juzo reached out and touched her hand with his fingertips. The contact was brief, but it felt wrong all the same. His skin was cool, clammy, and Lian moved her arms to her sides so he wouldn’t be tempted to invade her space again; she hoped anyway.

“I know you aren’t like him,” Juzo was saying. “I know you want to help Baisho.”

His words needled her, crawling under her skin like skittering insects. It felt like more of an invasion than his touch had been, as though he had pulled a secret from the depths of her being.

Lian utilized every ounce of her training to keep a straight face. “What makes you say that?”

“I’ve seen you at the recruitment rallies, Lian.” His tone and expression were both dubious. “You can’t fool me. I came to tell you we’re doing another one tomorrow morning.” He swallowed, seeming nervous again. “You should sign up.”

“But, my father—” It was a flimsy argument, but she tried to make it anyway. At least until Juzo interrupted her.

“He has no power over you, Lian. You’re an adult. You don’t need his blessing.” He went on, but she wasn’t listening anymore.

Could she really go against her father’s wishes? He had expressly forbidden her to get involved and she knew him well enough to be certain he was serious. If she did this, would he still love and accept her?

Of course he will. He’s my father!

“I’ll come.” It was her turn to interrupt Juzo. “But I can’t promise anything. I need to think. Thanks for coming, I guess.”

Juzo made to stop her, but Lian shut the window in his face before he could fully protest. She was finished with the conversation and if he didn’t leave, she had no qualms alerting Taoru to his presence. Let him handle the errant captain, Lian wasn’t lying when she said she needed to think.

With the shade pulled down, Lian was relieved that she could no longer be seen by Juzo. Having him this close to her room was uncomfortable enough and she considered calling out to Taoru anyway, but if she did that it might hurt her chances at being accepted into the military. It was in that moment she realized her mind was already made up.

Thoughts of Captain Juzo evaporated. Lian swallowed the lump in her throat, her mouth suddenly very dry. For the first time in her life, she was making a conscious decision to disobey her father. Tomorrow morning she wasn’t just going to observe the rally, she was going to join the military herself.