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Chapter 40. Alf: Yes It Is

The high orc lumbered into the clearing, plate mail gleaming in the moonlight. The thing was enormous, easily fifteen feet tall. A two-handed sword the size of a stop sign was slung carelessly over its shoulder. The blade was nicked and scarred, but even if it were dull as a butter knife, it would end Alf with a single glancing blow.

Alf scooped Blix into his arms and took off running, straight towards the orc, angling away at the last minute to use its momentum against it.

“Run for the main road!” Blix squirmed free of his grasp, dangling by a hand and partial arm from the leather cords of his harness.

“Hey!” Thrown off balance by her shifting weight, he staggered to the left, almost running into a tree. “Stop moving!” The orc was right behind them. One wrong step and they were dead.

“Help me onto your back,” she called out loud enough for the whole forest to hear. “It’ll be easier to run.”

“It’s too close.”

“Do it!”

Cutting to the left, he used the acceleration to swing her onto his back. She tugged and pulled and scrabbled higher onto his shoulders, throwing him off balance with every shift and jolt. Staccato blasts of hurricane-force breath sounded right behind them. The monster was too close. If it stabbed out with its sword now, it would be all over.

The harnesses yanked his shoulders backward for a dizzying second, and then Blix’s body pressed tight against his shoulders, her arm wrapped securely around his neck. “Go!”

Alf put his head down and ran for all he was worth, weaving in and out through the trees, swerving back and forth to keep to the densest parts of the forest. Thumps and clangs and clashes sounded behind him. Finally, after way too many close calls, the orc started to fall behind.

“That was close,” Blix breathed in his left ear.

“It’s what you wanted, though. Right?”

“Yeah. Head for the main road. The one that leads down hill to the stadium.”

“But that’s where the soldiers are camped.”

“Exactly.”

Alf had a bad feeling about this. “Are you sure? What if they have lookouts posted?”

“I’m counting on it.”

“But major healing won’t be off cooldown for almost an hour. If you get hurt…”

“If you’re still serious about going back to the campus, we’re going to need a major distraction. I don’t exactly blend in.”

“I could…” His chest tightened. This so wasn’t the time. But after everything that just happened, he couldn’t ignore it. If he couldn’t be straight with her now, this relationship would never work. “About what just happened… I maybe shouldn’t have—”

“Branch!”

Alf ducked a fraction of a second before a needle-covered bough slapped the top of his head.

“Thanks. Um… I want you to know that I really…”

“Slow down. We’re getting too far ahead.”

Alf slowed to a jog, waiting until the sounds of pursuit grew louder. The orc was even slower, probably because it didn’t have a 195 stamina. “I guess I’m trying to say that I…”

“Do you like me or not?” Blix’s voice held an edge of impatience.

“Of course, I like you. I like you a lot.”

“Good,” she said. “Everything’s settled.”

“Good,” he repeated lamely, waiting for his brain to catch up. “Um… Does that mean you…”

“I think it stopped,” Blix interrupted. “Try your new taunt skill.”

“Hey!” Alf shouted. “Big Ugly. What’s the matter? Afraid you don’t have enough stamina to handle this?” Alf flushed, realizing too late how ridiculous that sounded.

A roar sounded about forty yards away. The sounds of steel clanging against trees.

“That’s right, come on!” Alf continued to shout. “Blix, you never said…” He lowered his voice, suddenly self-conscious. “I know I’m acting like a middle schooler, but you never said… how you felt about me?”

A sigh tickled his neck. “If you’re going to be my boyfriend, you’re going to have to… Fire!” she hissed. “Over there. More to the right. Campfires. A lot of them.”

The orc chose that moment to let out a particularly loud roar.

“Quick,” Blix said. “Let it catch up, then run through the middle of their camp.”

Alf cut towards the campfires. The orc was running faster now. I was heading straight for the camp. Talk about fickle. Alf kicked it into fifth gear. It was all he could do to stay ahead of it.

A shout sounded somewhere ahead of them. More shouts.

Zigzagging through a grove of young pines, Alf paused at the edge of the soldier’s camp, waiting for the orc’s crashing and roaring to capture everyone’s attention before running into the clearing. “Monster!” he shouted. “Weapons, everyone. Monster!” He darted between two tents, swerved around a pair of groggy soldiers, and kept running. “Monster!” Leaping a campfire, plowing through a set of tent lines, he ran through the center of the waking camp.

A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

Screams sounded behind him. A chest-rattling roar. And then a cascade of dialogs filled his eyes. He tripped over a heavy object and crashed to the ground, sliding on his stomach, arms spread wide to keep him from rolling onto Blix.

“You okay?” He and Blixed whispered at the same time.

“Dialogs,” he explained as he climbed back onto his feet and ran for the cover of two large tents. Ducking down to take advantage of the shadows, he whispered, “For some reason the system is giving me credit for the orc’s kills.”

“Seriously?” Blix sounded way too excited given their circumstances. “Maybe it’s because we’re using the orc as a weapon. This could be huge.”

“You there!”

Alf turned as a half-dressed man carrying a two-handed sword stepped between the two tents.

“Monster attack!” Alf pointed towards the commotion. “Over there.”

The man didn’t hesitate. He charged them, swinging the sword in a great circle as he ran.

Alf didn’t have time to stand. Releasing the cane, he brought his sword up, holding it by the blade and hilt like a quarterstaff.

Clang! Alf cringed away from the blow, but it hadn’t been nearly as heavy as he’d feared. He pushed off the ground, driving his shoulder into the man’s gut. And kept running, trampling him underfoot as he ran out into the stampeding crowd. “Monster!” he added his voice to the cacophony of shouts. “That way.” He pointed behind him and ran in the opposite direction.

“Hey! Stop! Get him!” A cluster of soldiers converged on him, swords in hand.

He deflected a couple of wild slashes with his sword, and then he was through, sprinting for the relative safety of the forest.

“Alf!” Blix shrieked.

“What’s wrong?” He slowed to a jog as he hit the forest’s edge. His night vision had been destroyed by all the fires.

Someone hit him in the leg, probably trying to trip him. Alf turned, striking out blindly with his sword, and kept running. Deeper into the darkness.

“You okay?” he risked a whisper once he’d put a few hundred yards between them and the camp. “Blix?”

“Damn it!” Her voice was soft, but it roiled with barely contained rage. “Of all the places to waste a major healing spell!”

“What? Where are you hurt?” He ran for a patch of light and started to crouch down, but the back of his leg flared in sudden pain. “Crap!” He dropped awkwardly to the ground without bending the leg.

“You’re hit too?” Blix’s voice was an accusation. “Why didn’t you say something?”

“What?” He twisted to get a better view of his leg and discovered an arrow embedded in the meat of his calf. “So that’s what that was.” He checked his health bar and was shocked to see it was all the way down to 75.

Blix belly flopped to lie down next to him. “Who goes first? You or me?”

“What?” Then he saw it, another arrow was embedded in her left butt cheek. “Crap!” What was he supposed to do with that?

“If it’s all the same to you, I’d rather not,” she said in a wry voice.

“What?” He did a minor healing on her. Then, to take the edge off some of the pain that was just starting to get through the adrenaline rush, he tried one on himself. “I’ve never done this before,” he said. “We don’t even have a dagger. I may have to use the sword.”

“How much time before you can do another major healing?”

“Twenty-six minutes.”

“Too long. Just yank it out and hit me with a minor healing.”

Alf checked his minimap and nodded. The soldiers were probably organizing a search. They didn’t have much time. “Okay…” He knelt beside her and examined the wound.

“You’re checking out my ass,” she accused.

“Shut up.” He pulled at the fabric of her tunic. Based on the slits, it was probably a two-edged arrow. He used the tip of the sword to open the wound further and then pulled on the arrow, rocking it back and forth to work it out of the wound.

“I said yank it out,” Blix said through gritted teeth. “Not push it deeper”

The arrow pulled free, and Alf hit her with another minor healing spell. Followed immediately by another.

“What a pain in the butt.” She rolled onto her side. “Now let’s see how far I can drive that thing into your leg?”

She worked on him a lot longer than he had worked on her, and Alp was fairly certain she’d been a lot less gentle. By the time he had finished adding 84 more hit points, Blix had discovered a couple of slash wounds he hadn’t realized he’d gotten. Apparently, he’d blocked a lot less swords than he’d imagined.

“Five more minutes till major healing,” Alf announced.

Blix nodded and scanned the woods one more time. “How many EXP did the orc give you?”

He’d completely forgotten. He checked his stats and gasped. “I’m level six now. We’ve got three more attribute points and three more skill points to spend.”

“That’s great,” she said. “It’ll give us something to do when we’re on the road. I was thinking… My butt feels fine…”

“No. Absolutely not.” He hit her with a hard stare. “I promise I’ll try to heal your face, but not before we’re both at a hundred percent. Your face is fine the way it is. I don’t see why you’re in such a hurry. Unless…”

She turned away, covering the sudden motion with a cursory search of the woods, but Alf could tell she was avoiding something.

“Blix…” His cringed at the whiny tone. “Do you like someone else? Do you already have a boyfriend?”

“What?” She turned to stare at him—like he was the biggest idiot she’d ever encountered.

“You never said you liked me back. You said if I was going to be your boyfriend I’d have to do something, but you never said what.”

“You’re such an idiot.” She rolled her eyes. “You’re smart, generous, kind, super good-looking… You’re everything a girl could ever want.”

“Except…” He looked down at the ground, waiting for the coup de grace.

“Except nothing. You don’t get it. Someone like you doesn’t fall for someone like me. Sure, maybe now, when I’m the only human girl left in your entire universe. But once you get to town and all those native NPCs… Once all those fully human, fully articulated girls start throwing themselves at you, do you honestly expect me to believe you’re not going to dump me like a truck?”

“I would never—”

“No, maybe you wouldn’t,” she snapped. “Because you’re ridiculously nice. But I can’t be with someone just because he’s too nice to dump me. Don’t you get it? I don’t need your nice. And I certainly don’t need your pity!”

“But I don’t…” He shook his head. She wasn’t going to believe him no matter what he said. He turned his back to her. “Climb on. We need to go.”

“But I thought we were going to do the major healing first.”

“Not any more.” He unbuckled one of the straps to make the harness easier to climb into. “Now you’ll see what I have to deal with.”

* * *

Name: Jane

Level: 6

Class: Paladin

Health: 159/225

Stamina: 67/195

Mana: 654/784

Exp: 591/2800

Attr Points: 3

Skill Points: 3

ST: 13

DX: 14

CN: 15

IQ: 28

CH: 16

Combat Skills:

Faire du Canne 7: (Effective Skill: 9.45, Basis: ST+DX, Enhancement: 28.4%)

Grappling 1: (Effective Skill: 1.33, Basis: 2ST+DX, Enhancement: 4%)

Swordsmanship 2: (Effective Skill: 2.73, Basis: 2DX+ST, Enhancement: 8.2%)

Archery 1: (Effective Skill: 1.37, Basis: 2DX+ST, Enhancement: 4.1%)

Non-Combat Skills:

Woodcrafting 1: (Effective Level: 2.1, Basis: DX+IQ, Enhancement: 6.3%)

Lock Picking 1: (Effective Level: 1.3, Basis: DX, Enhancement: 3.9%)

Spells: (Basis IQ)

Minor Healing 5: (EL: 14, Cost: 25, Freq: unlimited, Effect: 42 points)

Major Healing 2: (EL: 5.6, Cost: 35, Freq: 1/hr, Effect: 200cc tissue regen)

Taunt 1: (EL: 1.6, Cost: 5, Freq: 1/min, Effect: 4.8%)