Well, that was easy. A little while ago I sent a diagonal drill towards the center of the crater. They're fucking slow though, so when I noticed the evil tree was being evil I had to redirect that sucker and take over digging myself. Much faster. Soon enough I was beneath Tigger’s Folly and ready to begin.

In this particular operation essence is bad, unlike most others. Because of this, I left myself a nice little dirt wall between myself and any danger and sent my tendrils through. First off, science. I went up and poked it. That particular tendril began to turn to crystal, the infection racing down before I cut it off. Hokay, easy method doesn’t work. Time for plan B.

Plan B is to dig a big box under it. I line the walls of the box with warpstone, then build a hinged lid ready to slam down at a push. After a moment of thought I also add a stick propping the lid open. It’d be bad if the sucker slammed shut too early.

Once the box is complete I dig up from there. I make a fourtyfivish degree slope going back and forth to avoid the two warp pipe that might be in the way, all the way up to surface next to the big ol’ crystal. I thought of going the even simpler route and just making a big sinkhole, but that might affect the pipes and that’d be somewhere between counterproductive and cataclysmic. I gather that’s what started this whole mess in the first place.

From there it’s a simple matter of putting some liquid dynamite on the surface level of the crystal- it goes underground for like ten feet but I’m none too worried about that. Maybe a gallon poured in a circle around the thing. Bit more on the side away from the pit so it’ll topple in the right direction and then presto! Light it up! Problem: How do I make fire? Hmm.

Hmm.

Dab a little bit of acidic nitroglycerin on the thing and then smack it with a rock. Presto! Lost a few tentacles but it’s fiiiiine and the whole thing is sliding down the slope right in the box! Dissolve the stick and Travis’ Troubles are sealed away forever! Or whatever that thing was called. Bunch of shards scattered around, but I gotta plan for that too.

Tongs.

And a smaller box. I’m sealing away little shards of evil even as Zetli slanders my good name. What will Itzal think of me now? Whatever. Shit, I’m gonna need a broom for some of this. It got everywhere and all the pieces are growing individually. Ugh. At least I don’t have to worry about missing any. In this rain whatever is left is going to be head-sized after an hour even if it’s a particle of dust.

Oh, and I build another box around the underground portion. Bit bothersome that warpstone is so valuable. Eh, another box around the box, this one just normal stone. I still feel like this isn’t enough but it’s good for now. Think I’ll check if a matter-to-mana array can dissolve this shit later. I’ll stick the array on a paint roller and just erase the crap. In the meantime, still busy.

It’s a very annoying situation. There’s no way to tell if I’ve prepared enough until an army shows up to kill me. Or doesn’t, maybe. I have no idea what the internal politics of the empire are. Can I just bribe them to go away? Fuck it.

Honestly, I’m entirely confident in winning a mundane confrontation. Wizard and warrior adventurers might be more difficult, but I know how to make gunpowder. Even smokeless gunpowder. I can just make a bunch of guns. That might not even change the power balance of the world if I don’t tell them how to make the ammo. Well, they’ll figure out something eventually but by that time I should be well established. The only problem is that I don't know how effective guns will be against aura users.

I could go the other direction and just make a ton of modern steel alloy spearheads. I know I can make a cutting edge that’ll blow these people’s minds. Spidersilk robes reinforced with carbon wire for edged weapons and then a gambeson for blunt. If I’m feeling fancy I could try for some sort of liquid armor- use some oobleck. Fuck all this people up with non-newtonian fluids when they haven't even newtoned.

Third, shock and awe. Or sheer terror. Make a field of dynamite, blow it when they walk over it. Even worse- chlorine gas is dead easy. I’d rather not be responsible for this world’s geneva protocols, however. I’d have to scout out for likely approach spots, but… Actually, that’s something I can do right now. The scouting, I mean. Not me personally, but I can give the humans the ability to scout. Seeing Zetli with that dinky lil telescope gave me ideas.

I go to the surface, right above where the evil tree was, and begin to build. I’m going big. I just destroyed an ancient landmark and a symbol, this isn’t time to be all teehee I’m silly harmless little floating rock. I’m flexin. Graphene reinforced concrete. The concrete I can already make, to this I just add a bit of 3d graphene to give it structure. Dead simple, but a lot of work.

At first production is quite slow- I think it takes me an hour to make a square foot of the stuff, but then it just clicks. This confirms my theory that I have a library of substances to draw from- while it takes some effort to register a thing in it, once I make it the first time it’s easier. Speeds up after that. I add a rebar cage in the middle for good measure. Not square, pyramid-shaped.

All this is off the cuff and unplanned but I compensate by using ridiculous overpowered materials. If you have an isekai cheat you should fucking use it. Mine is either future knowledge or being a 3d printer, depending on whether it’s the perspective of a pearl or a reincarnated human, but either way, time to put it to use.

Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

It will be a simple circular tower twenty yards in diameter. Each floor will be ten feet high, for that grand feeling, and the walls slope in gradually- each floor will be two feet less. I start with the piles. Can’t pound them in properly so I just build eighty straight down to bedrock. Then I begin to build in earnest.

One story, two- sunrise. I take a break to make a big umbrella, then a quick trip down to Bryn’s place to make some food, zeer pots to store it in, and another load of building materials for the Sahii. Bryn hasn’t woken yet so I just shove 'em all in the cart.

Shit, did she get dinner last night? Eh. She’s an adult and the Sahii are a quick drive away.

So, mark. Sunrise, two floors. Another unavoidable break to clean up all the remaining essence crystal. I make a third, fourth, fifth floor. I’m grooving. Each floor has two sets of stairs- two going to the floor above, two going to the floor below- and there’s a hole in the middle where I’ll be putting the elevator. Sixth, seventh, eighth level. Sunset.

I give each level two big windows, one east and one west, with smoked glass to cut down the glare and reflectivity. I vaguely recall something about reflected light from skyscrapers melting cars. I’ll avoid that. Smoked with a sheet of graphene baked in the glass, for both reinforcement and the smoking effect. Slap a window lattice on top to keep the birds away. Access door leading to a little balcony in front of the windows for the sake of whoever needs to clean ‘em, or whoever just wants to step out for a breath of fresh air.

Hell, I changed my mind. Full ring balcony around each level! Why the fuck not.

Nine, ten levels. People have arrived- a second tribe, I think. Or more Sahii. Maybe twenty people? Whatev. Hope Zetli has his big hat ready. This big ol’ phallus should give him some borrowed authority. Eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen… Get to twenty before sunrise begins again. Nice. 18 levels a day.

I can tell because it shrivels my tentacles. Maybe I could just make sleeves for em. Whatever. Today Bryn gets yogurt on oatmeal for breakfast while a big pot of stew boils on the hearth that I just built, along with the pot. Corned beef and cabbage. Yum. Wish I could have some. I ask Borb if he’s hungry- I suddenly recall I disconnected the feeder orb I had set up for the boars days ago. He’s fine.

Back to building. I get another ten levels done before I call it good. Bit thicker than the Leaning Tower of Pisa, but taller than the Eiffel Tower. I could push this farther with these materials but eh, it already looms over the crater walls. Good ‘nuff for a starter world wonder. As I built I left a trail of roots in the walls and I hook them up to four snorbs, one for each cardinal direction, then hooked ‘em up to waterspouts. There’s gonna be rainbows for days, man.

On the roof I make a big fucking bell. Huge- tsar bell class. I’m no bellfounder, I’m probably totally fucking the acoustics up, but I just hang it from an arch and call it a day. As a general rule of thumb, every single job is highly complex and has lots of specialized knowledge, but being a superintelligent- or at least high-speed smart- magic rock gives you the ability to half- or third-ass any given task. I’ll need to recruit a bunch of specialists in every single field to consult with, eventually. Then I’ll redo everything they tell me I totally fucked up.

A bell that size needs an immense clapper and those take the strength of a dozen men to move. I sidestep the issue cleverly with a ratchet gear and capstan. Some poor suckers will have to wind it for hours, but a single person can move the clapper into ringing position and then release it with a lever.

They’ll do this on orders from the top floor, which is a viewing platform. It looks sorta like an airport control tower with the slanted windows and all. I install a bunch of fixed platforms for telescopes- I’ll have to get someone with actual eyes to check if I telescoped them right tho. From here they’ll be able to see all sorts of things, like approaching armies. Ring the bell and all of China knows you’re here.

Then I move the snorbspouts so they’re BELOW the viewing platform, not above it. Oops, teehee.

Floor below that is another glass-walled floor. Dinky little temple. I build sixteen altars around the circumference of the room. The first I inscribe with the book of my main man, woman, or genderless person and/or non-person-thing Akasha. The rest of the altar decorates itself. Nice, lil creepy, but nice. The second one I mark for Vijanna. The same thing with the self-decorating, except the stone eye blinks and looks at me. This is fine.

The rest I leave blank, not being acquainted with those gods. The gods claim them themselves. A spear, a stack of coins, a cock, a pussy… Rather direct, aren’t they? I make a piece of paper and sketch the male and female symbols. After a moment they take the suggestion and change their engravings. Anyways. Crossed hammer and trowel, pitchfork and sickle, a flute and drum, a skull, a crown and scepter, sword and shield, a needle and thread, pot and ladle, a shattered manacle, and the final one is blank.

I consider writing “This space for rent” on it.

15 gods, eh? Nice of ‘em to move right in. Not like I wanted an introduction or a ton of boons or anything. Good thing there aren’t more- unless there IS more and number 16 is the god of nothing or something. Whatever. If they want more altars they can request them. I only added the thing to avoid the whole 'tower that challenges the heavens themselves' thing. Don't wanna get babeled.

Finally, I hang the elevator and call it a day. Real simple one powered by a capstan, with another ratchet gear powered device to serve as brakes. It goes up when the capstan is turned, but to go down someone on the elevator has to hold a spring-loaded lever down. Should prevent it from being dropped if the capstan goes unmanned. The wire rope is stainless steel- delightfully, all the ingredients are available to me.

Not sure what use chromium and manganese serve in biology, but I can make them so I guess they have some purpose.

Open some floors at the bottom, job done. Open a door at the fifth level with a set of stairs leading up to it, now it’s futureproofed for when the whole crater is flooded.

What, furniture? Room divisions on each floor? Humans can take care of that. I just built the damn thing, I don’t care how they use it.

Oh right- need a bathroom for each floor. Four disintegration toilets in stalls, a mirror, a window, and a sink to wash your hands. Another snorb up top and some basic plumbing to power the sinks. I don’t have to go anymore but humans still do.

I should fix that. But how can I safely engrave a matter-to-mana conversion array in the intestines? Hmm...