In the beginning, there was only darkness- Like hell I'm starting from there.

Let's start from the little fucker.

Japanese, NEET, addicted to anime, virgin, no friends, lives alone, watches porn all day? Yeah. That guy. The typical reincarnation MC.

Anyways, one day he ran out of food, games, and new porn videos.

On that day, for the first time of his life, he went outside.

Never did it before, first time.

I don't have to repeat myself, do I? Kid somehow never experienced the sensation of sun on his skin.

Anyways, while trying to cross the street while glittering like a vampire, he saw a kid.

Probably reminded of his loli porn, he stared at her like a pedophile.

Wait, he probably was one.

Luckily no one seemed to see him staring at her, or the little girl.

Anyways, a truck was casually driving by.

Obeying the speed limits and everything, eyes on the road at all times, emergency break was ready.

No one had hired him to hit anyone yet, so he was happily whistling.

Poor guy.

The girl crossed the street right before the light turned red, and the pedo dude walked straight to her, not noticing the truck.

Luckily, the truck driver stopped in time! No one was hurt!

But there had to be a girl, who saw the harem lead and immediately thought he was going to hit on her, despite simply crossing the street.

So when the truck began to move again, a flying dead body was sent barreling into the side on the truck, tipping it over.

Girl, did you really have to send that asshole to another world?

A goddess took pity on him and took him to a white room to reincarnate him.

Yeah... I'm not going to write what happens there.

All you need to know is that I'm still confused on the policy about virgins, and whether what happens THERE was just a loophole.

Anyways, he got a cheat. Infinity Mana, ultimate learning rate, mastery of sword art, talent in every single goddamn magic category, and the goddess even promised to meet him again when he comes of age.

Man, the goddess must have really been lonely.

Anyways, he was born safely to a low Marquis family. Hot dad, hot mom, hot maid. He really hit the jackpot.

He should really thank the goddess for not having abortion. Anyways, at the age of one, he mastered the household's secret sword techniques. Which he somehow mastered by seeing his dad swing his sword once.

Anyways, after flawlessly demonstrating it to his parents, his mom and maid pressured his dad to go against the OP 1 year old baby.

Dad tried to go easy, barely swung his sword. He basically strolled up to the reincarnated guy.

Then the baby suddenly blasted him with fire.

Dad somehow blocked the baby blasting fire at him, point blank.

Mom and maid chastise him for going hard. Baby suddenly appears in front of dad and nearly runs him through with the sword.

If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

And that's how OP MCs win against people who would typically love them like their own son.

Poor guy didn't even try to attack. I doubt he would ever look at his son the same way.

Anyways, all you need to know is that he and his maid had a cup of hot coffee that night.

I... I really don't know how the hell that would work.

I don't think that the goddess was thinking with her head when she decided to make... It that big for his age

Anyways, mastered all forms of magic, did his mom, he got a sister at age 3, did her too, childhood friend, did her, got sent to magic academy, fucked everything with a pulse while being hailed as a genius.

When we finally get to the beginning of the story, he's about 10, and has a harem of 20 people, ranging from spirit, princesses, childhood friends, low ranked nobles, personal knights, apprentices, "masters", cat girls, dog girls, elves, spider girls, goddesses, and a volcano. Oh, and a loli demon queen.

Anyways, they were on a hill, and there's a tree, and he pulled a Jesus and fig tree.

Yes, he fucking cursed a tree for not bearing fruit.

It was in the middle of winter too.

To top it off, it was a holy tree, which didn't ever bear fruit. You were just supposed to eat the mushrooms at the base.

Even the harem members would have thought that was stupid, if they weren't... Mindless... Slaves...

...

Please let me kiss this dude- AUTOCORRECT WHY ARE YOU SO INTO THIS GUY.

Is my phone a harem member too?

Anyways, kill.

So the holy tree was cursed to never bear fruit.

That means that it could no longer pass down the job of preserving the world and stabilizing it, meaning that OP-kun destroyed the world.

Congratulations, moron, you just invited the apocalypse, and screwed over the only people who could actually stop you!

I mean, right now the goddess is your bitch and won't ever go against you, and the other gods don't want to see if you're bisexual.

Poor holy tree... It just wanted to save the world, but no, you just had to act like Jesus, didn't you?

Anyways, harem tribe walked away, harem chief leading the way.

When the slave group and the owner finally left, the tree started to glow. No, not Morse Code. Our little OP dude only invented tanks, not anything that would actually be useful. The tree just started to shine.

And then it collapsed. Not falling, simply collapsed on to itself, like a certain apple tree a certain someone summoned a goddamn black hole in just because the branches prevented him from seeing yet another girl's bare ass.

Where the holy tree used to stand, a skinny figure stood there.

It was... A guy!

Holy fuck it was a guy!

Somehow the curse had a side effect, and turned the tree into a human male!

I thought for sure that it would turn into a naked girl and beg for him to r move the curse, and basically turn herself into yet another slave for his sexual desire!

No offense women, but this guy is a template MC. And it's a rule that all characters which should be capable become slaves to him. Unless they're a guy. Guys are apparently all assholes.

Fucking Gary Stu's.

Anyways, it was a guy, and he had a leafy outfit. Not going to elaborate, he needs to-

Oh god his face is turning blue.

What the fuck did that shitty bastard do to him?!

We see one possibly good character, and you try to kill him off? Shit, you need to get NTRed, fast.

Tree guy's face turned blue, and he collapsed. His body was twitching, but did not move, as if he was poisoned, or could not-

Oh god he can't breathe. God, he's a tree. He never had limbs or lungs. A plant would never have the chance to learn anything like that.

No no no no! OP guy, you just fast forwarded the apocalypse, and more importantly just killed an innocent tree!

You should have been aborted, you son of a bitch.

The ground began to tremble. Steam rose out of the earth, as if it was a volcano about to blow. The dryad began to convulse. Its body arched one last time, and then stopped completely.

Just like that, everything stopped.

I- I'm sorry... There is nothing I can do about that shitty bastar-

The man lying on top of the hill suddenly inhaled and sat up, gasping for air. He was alive! That shitty bastard who scared the fuck out of me was alive!

You piece of trash, I'm never going to forgive you for giving me a heart attack! I thought you were dead and everything!

As his breathing began to calm down, he exhaled a little bit of smoke. It took form as a spirit...

He's been getting on with it too? Damn... No, wait. Ah, that makes sense. The reason he could suddenly breathe was because of the spirit helping him.

Anyways, it flew off, giggling. The dryad bowed to show his gratitude, and turned around. He began to take off his shirt.

I never knew trees were exhi- Again, oh.

Smack dab in the middle of his chest, there was a massive scar, purple and letting off suspicious fumes. The dryad touched it and winced. Looked hella painful. Fucking Jesus imposter.

He scraped a little off and held it to the light of the sun, his finder not sparkling like a vampire. He began to scowl even more. Understandable, since he met that son of a bitch.

The bastard needs to die, and with no one to love him.

The dryad shook his head sadly, and put.his right hand on his heart. He got on one knee, and looked straight at the sun, and said something that would nearly turn me bi.

"I swear on the date of the world that I will undo this curse and stop this monstrosity. I swear on my life that I will put an end to that man, and protect the balance of the world."

Basically, he'll go blow the brains out of the shitty son of a bitch who goes around being a little fucker, all to protect the universe.

FUCK YEAH!

It's show time.