I went to college for the same reason why most other people go to college, for a degree to get a good job. I did the whole shabang, 4 years at a university studying biology with a focus in genetics and got my diploma.

However, the big recession hit right after I graduated. Everybody was losing their job and it was impossible to work anywhere so the only thing I got was being a lab assistant studying birds. It was actually fun and I was surprised how much I enjoyed the job. I originally wanted to go work somewhere doing field research but this bird job working indoors and putting feathers through a machine wasn’t too bad!

It was nice, I even had a huge crush on my lab supervisor. He was short, funny and had the curliest brown hair I have ever seen. I thought I kept it professional and didn’t show it but one day when he asked me out to go get drinks at a bar I was so excited. He told me to show up to the nearby dive bar after work one day and I was beaming with happiness. I showed up in my short red skirt and a cute tank top with hearts all over it. I elated when I saw him.

Except, I saw all my coworkers there sitting with him too. I thought this was an intimate one on one date but I guessed wrong and it was very evident. One other girl that was a coworker started giggling at me, she was my age and she knew exactly what I thought too. I felt so embarrassed. But he didn’t seem to notice or mind. 

“Hey! You look good!” I remember him saying to me and motioning for me to join the rest of the group.

I was upset but I covered it with a simple smile, of all things why would I think this was romantic! I definitely was just projecting my crush on him and made myself think he had a crush on me too. That part wasn’t the bad part though.

Stolen story; please report.

Fast forward to a week later and I had my first shift with him again. He came in and asked me something.

“Hey did you leave me something on my desk?” He asked.

I was confused, no I didn’t want to even interact with him after the bar incident.

“No, did I miss a report?”

“Umm actually it says your name on the stuff. Did you mean to put it for somebody else?”

“What do you mean?”

He then saw my confused look and asked me to come see for myself. My heart was racing and I didn’t know what was going to happen. I opened the door and my soul DROPPED.

There were flowers and chocolate on his desk. I don’t know who did this at all. And suddenly I had an epiphany. That sneaky bitch of a coworker planted these to make me feel embarrassed. First her laughing at me and now this, she had it out for me!

“Oh yeah! I’m so sorry, the assistants don’t have a place to keep stuff but this was for my mom who just had surgery.” I quickly made up an excuse.

I picked up the stuff and moved it back to my group table that I shared with a few other people.

“What the fuck was that?” I slammed my hand on that whore’s desk.

“Hahaha, so you figured it out”. She laughed 

And keep in mind I am not saying her name in case I get upset again and commit a homicide, I don’t want anything to be traced back to me. So I was so upset and I walked out but here’s the trick, when I slammed my hand down I made a loud noise so she didn’t notice I left a small little bag on the side of her work area. Inside that little bag was some illegal psychedelics I got from my friend that just visited from Colorado. My plan next is that I am going to go to Mr. Supervisor’s desk and mention that I noticed she was acting a little weird so hahaha everything is going to be great :) .