“Gayah!” Sal screamed as he heaved his sword up high and struck down at me with the force of, well, of a high level guard I guess. The sword hit my shield for what was probably the hundredth time, splitting it completely in two. What the hell?
Dreamtech Industries had made many innovations and the previous years, but some of the stuff that had been happening since I arrived in the game just weren’t right. They made sense, but only if the game was actually real.
“Wooo!” Boomed Sal as he ran around the pen thrusting his free fist into the air. “Damn, that felt good!” The guard had hit only the shield for the most part, but there was still the phantom pain of a big gash he took out of my leg when he went for a low blow.
I rested my hands above my head to conserve oxygen as I fought back the urge to sit down. “Well, I’m glad it went so well for you haha. How did you not kill me anyways?”
“Oh, I pulled the blow is all. I don’t need my old friend who is now my partner in crime dying by my hand.” He walked over and pat me on the back.
I stepped back and raised my eyebrows, but didn’t say anything. Pulled the blow?? After a second I decided that I was going to stop second guessing everything and would just have fun. It was clear that the game I was playing wasn’t exactly the same as before.
It felt like I was in a whole separate world from the other players. A world where scripted lines weren’t a thing, shields can physically break in half, and guards can pull back their blows so they don’t ruin their chances at outing their cheating wife.
I gave the man a smile and said, “Yeah, that makes sense. Hey it’s getting late, isn’t it?”
“Yes, yes it is. I think my shift is done for the day, wanna go grab a beer and make a plan for tomorrow? It’s best to do it soon, the prince is set to be married this weekend.”
“Yes, that sounds good. I could use a drink.” I put away the broken shield and followed Sal down to the tavern. “
The guard had downed three pints and was beginning to get out of hand. “You know, if that plunk wasn’t such a snooty snot little brat, I’d put my sword straight through his skull. Actually. That’s just what am I to do.” Sal stood up, whipped out his sword and stumbled towards the door.
“Hey, hey buddy, wait,” I yelled after him. I caught up and then put an arm around him so he wouldn’t fall. “Where do you sleep? I’ll help you get there.”
“No, no, no!” I need to go kill that little twat and then go throw that hag into the road.”
“Shhh, shh buddy, it’s gonna be okay. Let’s get you home.”
“Gah! You are so annoying adventurer. I can’t go home. Let’s get a room.” The guard took out a sack of coins and threw it at the innkeeper before I could stop him. “One room, two beds please sir.” He then dropped out of my hold to his knees and then flopped down, face first into the ground. Well, there’s a first time for everything… I thought as I got ready to lift the guard up.
After about ten minutes of watching me struggle, the innkeeper reluctantly helped me carry the drunken brute up the wooden stairs, all the way down the hallway, and into a medium sized room on the left.
The room was sparsely furnished with two wooden beds covered by red torn sheets, a medium sized oak table, and a painting of a sword on the wall. No, it wasn’t a sword. That’s Gilded Dragon Slayer #6!! I thought as my heart grew heavy. I really hoped that I’d be able to get it back. We threw Sal on the bed that lay vertically up against the back wall. I took the one that was in a similar position up against the back wall.
The innkeeper silently ducked out before I could ask him about the painting; he was obviously happy to get away from us. I plopped down on the second bed and tried to drown out Sal’s house-shaking snores.
My mind drifted to my first day in what was obviously a much more real DSO. I didn’t know what to expect to come out of my adventures, but I knew it was going to be good. My eyes eventually grew heavy, sending me into a deep sleep.
***
The next thing I knew, I was making my way through a wooded path. I wore a long neon orange jumpsuit, my hands were tied behind my back, and a armor clad man rested his free hand on my shoulder, occasionally pushing me to go faster.
I looked over at the man and gasped. He didn’t have a single hair on his body besides eyelashes. He held a club in his right hand, which he used on me after I looked over. “Get moving prisoner 44567,” he growled at me.
My chest tightened. The pain in my upper right arm made sure that I didn’t try to do anything dumb. We made our way through the forest for what felt like forever. Eventually we stopped as the guard pulled on my shoulder wrenching me backwards.
The guard pulled an axe out of his bag, turned to a large redwood and then threw the axe at it, completely embedding it in the tree. The man then walked over to me, removed my bindings, and then began walking in the direction that we had come from. After a few steps he looked over his shoulder and with no emotion said, “You know what will happen if you don’t cut down enough trees.”
***
My eyes shot open; I was in the worn down bed at the inn. It was a dream… I thought. I looked around and Sal was gone. All that he left behind was an unmade bed and a pool of vomit on the floor. The stench of beer and beef clogged my nose, sending me running out the door.
I made my way down the stairs and noticed that it was basically dead. The room had six rows of long tables with equally long benches on either side of each table. To my far right the innkeeper stood behind the bar pouring sal a drink.
I walked over and had expected the man to be sad, but Sal sat up and enthusiastically greeted me. “Look who it is Toly! It’s the adventurer that’s gonna deal with my pig of a wife.” The guard instantly looked dissatisfied with his own words and the innkeeper who was actually named Tony just ignored him.
“Hey. Look Tony, it’s the man that’s gonna help me get my shit back today,” I said as I sat down on a stool next to Sal.
We both chuckled at the idea. “You know Sal, I think that getting on the Prince’s bad side might not be good for your job as one of his guardsman.”
The man looked at me and a weird playful expression crossed his face. “You don’t worry about that! You worry about how we are going to get the job done.”
Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings.
I smiled, glad that my new friend had options and wasn’t just going to throw everything away for revenge. “Then let’s get out of here and figure out how to screw over the prince and your soon to be ex wife.”
Sal nodded, stood up and we said our goodbyes to a not phased Tony. “So Sal, how are we gonna do this?” I asked on the way out.
“Oh you know, learn an often overlooked spell, create a spectacle, and ruin some lives. That’s all,” The man sad, smiling devilishly.
“What are you planning you crazy bastard? It’’s not gonna get us killed is it?”
“Only if we get caught. Let’s go and you’ll find out soon enough.” I nodded and followed him west through Landalof, but thoughts about how I had always hated riddles and surprises plagued me the entire way.
We continued west as we passed the training grounds, the farm behind it, a shop on the other side of the road, and a few houses. The road continued and after a few minutes we were outside what I knew was the magic shop.
“What are we…?”
“YOU’LL SEE!” screamed Sal as he rushed through the door without knocking. It was at that moment that it was the first time I had ever thought about knocking before going in an NPC’s house.
“Greetings Barbara you old hag. I’ve come to bargain.” Hey… wait.
“Where did you hear that saying?”
“What saying?” Sal answered. I was just telling her that I’ve come to bargain.”
Feeling relieved, I looked up at the witch. Sal looked at me curiously for a moment but then turned to the witch. She stood at an impressive four feet tall, wore greenish rags, and spotted a crooked nose. Sadly enough she didn’t have the typical hat of a witch.
“Hey wait... Wheres Mordamir? Doesn’t he run the magic shop?” Both Sal and Barbara, or Barbarina according to her name plate, grew uncomfortable looks on their faces.
“Oh yes, he is at one of the other magic shops.” Barbara answered boldly.
“But I thought…”
“Hey buddy, don’t get all frazzled you forgot what shop has what powerful being. Let’s just bargain with this wonderful lady that I definitely didn’t call a hag and get out of here.” I didn’t know why, but something was starting to seem really off with Sal that day.
“Okay boys, now that that’s over, what can I do for you?”
“My friend and I have a problem and we think that a good spell might help us out.”
The witch smiled wide as any discomfort she previously wore washed off her face. “Oh, of course! I’d love to make some money off of a new adventurer! You pesky adventurer’s always want more power, which means I can usually make a pretty penny.”
“Well, Barb, I think you are gonna do this man a favor today and let him browse your spells and choose one for free.”
“For free?” The witch asked, obviously opposed to the idea. “But…”
It was then that the witch nodded her head, looked down at the ground away from us and started going through her bookcase. “Here you go, uhm adventurer.”
A screen translucent screen appeared before me and at the top of it where the categories beginner, intermediate, advanced, sacred, and untouchable. I scrolled through each menu and saw a wide variety of spells, which included ones I knew beginning players didn’t typically have access to.
I expected to not be able to see the sacred and untouchable spells, but there wasn’t an issue when I clicked on the tabs. “So I can learn anything I want?” I asked nervously. Something did feel quite off.
“Uh, yes, but only one please,” the witch reluctantly pleaded.
I looked over to gauge Sal’s reaction, but he seemed back to his old self. “One’s fine, just make sure that you know how it’s gonna solve our issue Ky.”
I nodded and then continued to look over my options. There were three that I thought could help us.
Clairvoyance
This spell allows you to gain pertinent information. At lower levels it can be rather uncontrollable, but at higher levels you could learn a great deal without the need of seeing, hearing, tasting, or smelling. I really don’t know what information you could gain by tasting, but then again I guess I’m not the adventurer. Note: gaining proficiency in this skill may allow you to transfer knowledge you learn to others.
The skill seemed promising, but I just wasn’t sure how much it would help without me leveling it up. I turned to the next skill and chuckled to myself.
Explode Humanoid
You can cause humanoids that are below your level to explode. Beware, area of effect damage may harm you or others if you aren’t careful.
I stifled my chuckle and turned to Sal seriously, mustering the most wicked grin I could. “Well, Sal, I’ve got it. I’ll learn explode humanoid and we’ll blow the two up while they are banging and then we’ll be through with our issue.”
The witch looked at me like I was insane and yet sal looked perfectly fine with what I had suggested. “Sounds good to me, let’s go.” There didn’t seem to be a hint of remorse in his voice. Wasn’t the woman his wife? He had seemed weird all day, but that was a bit much.
I shook it off and made an excuse as to why it wouldn’t work. “We wouldn’t want to damage the castle or anything, and plus I think that being shamed to the entire town for eternity would hurt more than a quick explosive death. Don’t you think?”
“Yeah, that’s true,” The man claimed, even though his eyes told a different story. I looked down at the last spell I thought could be rather useful.
Telekinesis
This spell allows you to manipulate the forces of nature with your mind. The more proficient you become with this skill, the more objects you can move and the effectiveness in which you do so will improve. Just try not to get caught lifting girls’ skirts.
I blushed and for some reason Sal let out a torrent of laughter. I decided that the spell could be used to my advantage and would also benefit me in some other ways. To be honest, it was a common spell lurers used, but I thought it was the most useful at that point in time. I selected the spell and then something strange happened.
I fell to my knees as every nerve in my body lit up. I clenched my head in pain as what felt like a billion votes of electricity caused my head to explode in a wave of hot corrosive plasma. Then everything went black.
When I woke up I was still on the floor, but both Barbara and Sal were gone. I sat up and realized that most of the pain was gone. I didn’t know what had happened, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to try and provoke it again.
As I sat up, I realized I could hear a muffled noise from the door in the back that led to the witch’s private bedroom. I wasn’t sure if I should knock or what, but then I realized something. I know telekinesis now. I could feel something new floating through me. I raised my hand and focused on the door knob.
At first nothing happened. I looked at it more and more. My hand shaked shook, but nothing happened. I focused more and more. The noise was generic and muffled, almost as if a spell was cast over the room.
Then it began to happen. The doorknob began to turn. I envisioned it turning over in my mind, but it stopped halfway with a hard click. It’s locked. I then focused my attention on the keyhole and a new feeling came over me. I could feel my brain's connection to the keyhole. It was like my thoughts were wrapped around it, like they tried to make their way in. A notification presented itself with the usual ding.
Skill Update
You have felt your skill Telekinesis for the first time. You are currently skilled enough to break the lock you are focusing on, but are not proficient enough to pick the lock. Focusing on the lock more and willing it to break will allow you to open the door, but be aware that the consequences are unknown.
I ignored the prompt and focused on breaking the lock. WIth a sharp snap, the door lock broke, allowing me to open it. The door slowly creaked open and the muffled noise was replaced with something else altogether as if a spell was losing its effectiveness.
Grisly groans erupted through the cracked door and assaulted my eaerdrums. An eerie moan pierced my very core. “Harder, harder,” squealed the witch.
“Gaaaah! Take this you old hag!” the grisly voice I then knew belonged to Sal. Every weird thing he had done all day stacked on top of what I was being forced to hear and I snapped. I pictured the door slamming and my mind grasped the handle, slamming the door shut. I got up and walked out the door. I’m still gonna do the quest, but I’m doing it for myself from now on. I walked out, reassured by the fact that I couldn’t trust a single human soul, digital or not.