Chapter 20 An old complication – Arianna

Arianna woke slowly, her body heavy with exhaustion. For a moment, she didn’t know where she was. The warmth surrounding her, the steady rise and fall of a chest beneath her cheek, the scent of firewood and steel—it was familiar yet disorienting. Then it all came rushing back.

The nightmare. The loop. Her parents’ deaths, again and again. The suffocating terror of the hobgoblin’s hands crushing her throat. And then—Cassis. His voice calling her name, breaking through the darkness.

She stirred slightly, shifting against him. His arms tightened around her instinctively, as if reassuring her that he was still there. She exhaled slowly, focusing on the rhythm of his breathing, the quiet of the early morning.

Her mind still felt fragile, the edges of the nightmare clinging to her like cobwebs. But she was here. She was safe. And for the first time in what felt like an eternity, she wasn’t alone.

She blinked at the faint morning light filtering through the curtains. It was still early, the house quiet in the lingering hush before dawn. At some point in the night, she must have turned in her sleep, because now Cassis was behind her, his chest solid and warm against her back, his arm heavy around her waist.

She needed to move—to shake off the last remnants of the nightmare, to ground herself in the waking world. Carefully, she tried to slip out of his hold, but the moment she wiggled even slightly, Cassis responded instinctively, tightening his grip around her waist.

Her breath hitched as she stilled. That wasn’t the only thing she noticed.

The press of his body against hers, the unmistakable hardness against her lower back—heat flooded her face.

She swallowed, her entire body stiffening. Of course, she knew about this. They were both adults, and she was well aware that men woke up like this naturally. It wasn’t personal, and it certainly wasn’t intentional. But knowing that didn’t make it any less awkward.

Just as she was debating whether to hold completely still or try once more to slip away, Cassis let out a low, grumbling sound.

“What are you doing?” he mumbled, voice rough with sleep.

Arianna froze.

She could pretend to be asleep. She could lie and say she wasn’t trying to leave. Or—she could just be honest.

Taking a slow breath, she whispered, “I was trying to get up.”

He didn’t answer right away. Instead, his arm around her flexed slightly, and then, as if he finally became aware of how tightly he was holding her, he hesitated. The space between them was nearly non-existent, his warmth seeping into her back, his breath ghosting over the nape of her neck.

For a moment, neither of them moved.

Then, abruptly, Cassis exhaled and loosened his grip, rolling onto his back. “...You could have just said something,” he muttered, rubbing his face.

Arianna turned her head slightly, peeking at him over her shoulder. His hair was a mess, his eyes still heavy with sleep, and there was a slight flush on his ears.

She bit the inside of her cheek to keep from smiling.

“I didn’t want to wake you,” she said simply, pushing herself up into a sitting position.

Cassis groaned and ran a hand through his hair. “Too late for that.”

Arianna let out a breath, some of the earlier tension leaving her. The nightmare still lingered at the edges of her mind, but the moment felt… normal. Awkward, yes. But normal.

And for now, that was enough.

Cassis sat up, leaning back against the wall at the head of the bed, the blanket strategically draped over his lap. His expression was unreadable, but Arianna noticed the subtle tension in his posture—like he was trying very hard to act normal.

She really tried not to notice. She really tried not to think about it.

But now that she was aware of it, she couldn’t stop being aware of it.

Still, she forced herself to focus on something else. Like how much she had liked waking up pressed against him. How warm and solid he had felt. How safe. Alright, that didn’t actually help with her attraction to him.

But it had been a long time since she had been that close to someone. Five years, to be exact.

Her father’s death had shattered her, leaving her hollow and adrift. Her boyfriend at the time had tried to be supportive at first, but when her grief refused to fade, when the depression settled deep into her bones, he had left. She didn’t blame him—he had been young, and she had been… too much. Too sad. Too tired.

Even after the worst of it passed, she never really recovered. She went through the motions of life—working, earning VP, taking care of herself—but she never truly lived. The only real human connection she had maintained was Cassis, watching his fights, following his journey.

And now, here they were.

She didn’t want him to know how pathetic her life had been.

So, she straightened her shoulders and decided to act like the adult she was.

“Thanks again,” she said, her voice steady. “For last night. For everything.”

Cassis glanced at her, then gave a small nod. “You don’t have to keep thanking me.”

She hesitated, then added, “I mean it.”

A beat of silence stretched between them before he shifted, studying her. “Do you want to talk about it?”

She knew what he meant.

Arianna opened her mouth to answer, but the words caught in her throat. The memory of the nightmare was still fresh—the endless loop of watching her parents die, of dying herself over and over, the helplessness, the horror. Her vision blurred as tears welled in her eyes.

She clenched her jaw, trying to swallow them back, but Cassis noticed. His gaze softened, and without a word, he opened his arms.

Arianna didn’t hesitate.

She scooted onto her knees and leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his waist. The moment he held her, she let go of the last bit of restraint she had been clinging to.

Sobs wracked her body as she buried her face against his chest.

“It was a loop,” she choked out between breaths. “I kept seeing them—my parents. They were already dead before I came here, but in the dream, they were alive. At first, it was… it was nice. I thought—” She squeezed her eyes shut, fresh tears spilling down her cheeks. “But then the hobgoblin—” Her voice broke. “It kept killing them, then me. Again and again. And I couldn’t stop it.”

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Cassis’ arms tightened around her. He didn’t say anything, just held her as she cried, as she let out all the pain she had kept locked away for years.

And for the first time in a long time, she didn’t feel alone.

When Arianna finally emerged from her crying fit, she felt… lighter. As if some of the weight she had been carrying for years had finally eased, if only a little.

Then she noticed something else.

She was straddling Cassis’ lap.

Her body stiffened as realization dawned.

How had that happened?

She had no idea, but now she was completely at a loss about what to do. Moving away seemed like the logical choice, but somehow, she couldn’t bring herself to do it.

Instead, she sat frozen, painfully aware of the warmth of his body beneath her, of his hands resting lightly on her back, of the slow, steady rise and fall of his chest.

And just like that, an old memory surfaced—one she hadn’t thought about in years.

She had first seen Cassis when she was seventeen, watching him fight in Avaria through the blue screen in her dream. He had been twenty-eight back then, tall and broad-shouldered, with dark hair, golden eyes, and a taciturn nature that only made him more alluring. What girl wouldn’t have had a crush on him? He had been like something out of a fantasy novel, a warrior carved from myth.

She had been attracted to him especially because her life hadn’t been a fairytale.

Her mother had died giving birth to her, and it had always been just her and her father. They had been happy—until everything changed.

A few months before she had bought the sapphire necklace, her father had been diagnosed with cancer. He had started treatment immediately, but it weakened him, and for the first time in her life, Arianna had been truly afraid. She hadn’t told her friends about her fears—hadn’t had the heart to.

So, she had felt alone.

For four years, she had watched him struggle. At first, they had thought he had beaten it, but then it came back, more aggressive than before, and there was nothing the doctors could do.

During that time, she had lost touch with most of her friends. She hadn’t wanted to go out and have fun when her father was dying. A few close friends had stayed, the kind who didn’t push but were always there to listen. One of them had become her boyfriend—not because she had particularly liked him that way, but because it felt nice to snuggle up to someone who cared and it had seemed to ease her father’s worries. He hadn’t wanted her to be alone when he was gone.

And then, when her father had finally passed, her boyfriend had left too. He had stayed with her for over a year after but she couldn’t bring herself to even care about him anymore. Not when she had lost her last family.

But even then, she hadn’t been completely alone. She had always had Cassis.

Sure, he hadn’t known about her. He had his own battles to fight, his own struggles to survive. They hadn’t talked about their personal lives, hadn’t shared secrets or dreams. Their conversations had always been focused on one thing: keeping him alive.

But now, here she was—closer to him than she had ever imagined.

It was strange, telling him about her past, about her father, about the life she had lived before coming to Avaria. In some ways, she knew Cassis better than anyone. And in others, he was a complete stranger.

Like now.

She hadn’t known he would hold her so patiently, so quietly, while she cried.

She hadn’t known he would feel so awkward and flustered when she had noticed his morning wood.

She hadn’t known he would turn red when she had been lying in her underwear in this bed just a little over a day ago.

And the memory of that—the way his ears had burned with embarrassment and how he couldn’t even look at her—suddenly made her laugh.

She tried to stop, but the more she thought about it, the harder it was to hold it in.

She was shaking with laughter now, her body trembling as uncontrollable giggles spilled from her lips.

Cassis groaned, his hands tightening on her hips.

“Arianna,” he said, his voice strained, rough with frustration. “Please. Stop.”

But that only made her laugh harder.

Until she realized why he sounded so strangled.

Because in her laughter, she had accidentally started grinding against his lap.

And the moment she understood that, her laughter died in her throat.

Her breath caught. Heat surged up her neck.

And Cassis—whose hands were still on her hips—was completely, utterly still.

Arianna froze at first, her breath uneven, her heart hammering in her chest. But then a thought crept in. Why not?

She had spent so many years alone, wrapped in her grief, keeping herself at arm’s length from the world. She hadn’t realized just how starved she was for human contact, for warmth, for closeness.

It didn’t have to mean anything. It could just be a moment—something small, something just for herself, to remind her that she was alive.

And if Cassis didn’t like her at least a little, he would have pushed her away already. So, she made a decision.

Slowly, deliberately, she lifted her gaze to meet his golden eyes and started to move her hips again.

A sharp breath hissed through Cassis’ teeth. His hands tightened on her waist, his fingers digging in just slightly, not to stop her—but as if bracing himself. His eyes widened, startled, but he didn’t pull away.

He didn’t stop her.

Arianna’s pulse thrummed in her ears as she moved, slow and careful, rolling her hips just enough to feel him beneath her. Even though their pants and the blanket still separated them, the friction sent a pleasant heat curling through her body.

She kept her eyes on his, searching for any sign of hesitation, any indication that he wanted her to stop.

But all she saw was the way his jaw tensed, the way his throat bobbed as he swallowed, the way his grip on her hips tightened every time she shifted against him.

He was letting her do this. And more than that—he wanted it. The realization sent a fresh wave of warmth through her, pooling low in her belly.

This felt good. For the first time in years, she felt wanted. Desired. Alive. And she wasn’t ready to stop just yet.

The pleasure built between them, slow and electric, each movement sending sparks through her body. She clutched his shoulders harder as a soft moan escaped her lips before she could stop it.

That was all it took for Cassis to take action.

His grip on her hips tightened, fingers pressing firmly into her skin as he started moving against her, meeting her rhythm with slow, deliberate thrusts. It was effortless, instinctual—like they had done this countless times before.

They moved together, perfectly in sync, their bodies responding to each other in a way that felt both natural and intoxicating. Their breath came rough and uneven, small moans and quiet groans slipping between them, filling the charged space between their bodies.

They hadn’t even kissed yet. They just looked at each other, locked in the moment, golden eyes burning into hers.

Arianna had never felt anything like this before—this kind of closeness, this kind of intimacy, and they were still fully clothed. It was overwhelming, consuming, yet somehow impossibly tender.

Their faces drew closer, inch by inch, their breaths mingling, lips just barely apart. Neither of them closed the distance, caught in the unbearable tension of the moment.

And then—

A door slammed shut, Cassis’ parents probably getting up.

The sharp sound shattered the fragile spell between them.

Arianna jolted, startled, and suddenly, the weight of the moment crashed down on her. Heat flooded her face, and an embarrassed, almost panicked thought flickered through her mind—

Oh God, this feels like being a teenager again, about to get caught making out with her boyfriend in his parents' house.

She quickly pulled back a bit, her breath still heavy, her pulse still thrumming wildly in her veins. Cassis looked just as caught off guard, his hands lingering on her hips, his golden eyes still dark with something unreadable.

Neither of them spoke.

But the air between them was charged, and there was no mistaking what had just happened. Or what had almost happened.

They were both breathing heavily, reeling from the intensity of what had just happened—and the abrupt interruption that had yanked them back to reality.

Cassis let out a quiet curse under his breath, then rested his forehead against her shoulder. His voice was low, rough with emotion when he finally spoke.

“Sorry, Ari. But… I think it’s good we were interrupted.”

Arianna froze. A sharp pang struck her chest before he even finished speaking.

“You’ve been through a lot in the past thirty, forty hours,” he continued. “Coming to a new world, the apocalypse starting, fighting for your life, getting injured, fighting for your life again, almost dying, and then that nightmare… I think you’re overstimulated from everything that’s happened, and we shouldn’t make any decisions we might regret.”

Arianna stiffened. Regret?

That single word cut deeper than she wanted to admit.

So that was it. He thought this was a mistake. He would have regretted it.

Then why hadn’t he stopped her earlier? Why had he held her, touched her, moved with her like that if he hadn’t wanted it too?

She tried to pull away, to scoot back and slip out of the bed before her hurt turned into something even more painful.

But Cassis didn’t let her go. His hands remained firm on her hips, keeping her in place. As if he knew exactly what she was thinking, he lifted his head, meeting her eyes again.

“Sorry,” he said, his voice softer now. “That didn’t come out right.” His gaze searched hers, willing her to understand. “It’s just that… this has been a turbulent time, and I would regret it if something happened that you didn’t truly want—if it was just because you needed to feel alive after everything.”

His golden eyes darkened, and she knew—knew—he was speaking from experience. He had almost died more times than he could count in the other timeline. He had probably felt that same desperate urge before, the need to grasp onto something, someone, to remind himself that he was still breathing.

Arianna swallowed past the lump in her throat. Her voice trembled slightly, but she still managed to smile at him.

“Alright,” she murmured. “I understand. It’s okay. Let’s talk about it when we’re both… not so shaky anymore. After some time has passed.”

A flicker of relief passed through his expression. Slowly, he loosened his grip, letting her go. Arianna slipped off the bed, her legs unsteady beneath her, and took a steadying breath. The air between them was different now—still charged, still full of unspoken things—but no longer overwhelming.

It wasn’t a rejection. But it was a pause. And for now, she could live with that.