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Dowsing Rods Don't Work
Chapter 16: Cute Without the 'E' (Cut from the Team)

Chapter 16: Cute Without the 'E' (Cut from the Team)

When they said a witch was coming, I expected someone who kind of looked like me - stereotypically goth, with a lot of blues and blacks, tons of lace, and arguably too much star jewelry. What I wasn’t expecting was a short woman with a pink piky cut, wearing a huge anime sweatshirt as a dress. When she’d gotten to the hotel room, she’d texted Caitlin that she was there and Caitlin gave her the room number, but I was still convinced that somehow whoever this was had gotten the wrong room.

“Oh hi!” she squealed, reaching up to hug Caitlin, and I fully realized that it wasn’t a mistake. The woman pulled back and stared around the room. “Luke,” she said, her eyes finally settling on him, “I can’t believe you got possessed again! Didn’t we just finish the last video like a year ago?”

“I’m sure it’s been way too long for our audience, and apparently the ghosts agree,” he said, standing up to give her a hug. “Circe, I’d like you to meet our newest video costar, Andi.”

“Andromeda,” I corrected, giving a slight wave from where I was sitting on the bed.

“Oh, you must be the psychic that Caitlin was talking about! I’m sure we’ll work together great, because you’ll see the ghosts, and I’ll banish them! That audience will love it!”

I nodded because, yes, from what I was hearing about the audience, I was sure they would love that sort of a thing. I wasn’t sure if this woman could actually banish ghosts or not, but it didn’t really matter all that much for the show aspect.

Caitlin and Cerce sat on the couch and caught up on everything that had been going on in the last year while Liam, Luke, and I got the camera equipment set up. I’m not sure how I exactly got roped into the task, considering I had never done much with cameras before, but Liam asked for a quick hand, and next thing I knew, he was giving me a list of the things that needed to be done. When I finished setting up a camera or light, one of the two of them would come behind me and make sure that it looked alright. I must have been doing something okay at least, because other than some minor adjustments, they seemed happy with the setup.

Setup took us about a half hour, after while Cerce skipped back to her room to grab her anti-possession toolkit, as she called it. She came back with a bag full of various oils, crystals, candles, and salts, which she started placing around the filming area.

It all seemed ridiculous to me still. Granted, I had never done an exorcism on anyone, considering this was the first time I’d seen someone with a ghostly attachment. But previous to this, in order to banish a ghost, all I had to do was guide them toward the light. I had to imagine that, while they might be more connected to someone that they were possessing, I couldn’t imagine it being all that different, but I was trying my hardest not to judge before the exorcism actually took place.

“Are we rolling?” Circe asked, and Liam nodded. “Great. Luke, you know the drill - please sit in the chair in the middle of the salt circle.” I watched Luke take his seat in the chair, halfway wondering about how we were going to clean up the various salts that she had scattered on the floor of the hotel. Surely we weren’t just going to leave that here for housekeeping to clean up, right?

Circe flipped off the lights (something the boys were apparently prepared for, as I saw Liam hit a button on the two closest cameras), and suddenly the room was only lit by a large collection of candles scattered on the floor around him. Circe then walked carefully over the salt circle and put her hand on Luke’s shoulder. I felt a light ache in my own shoulder, the memory of something sharp grabbing me jumping forward in my mind, but I pushed it out of my thoughts and tried to focus on whatever clusterfuck of a ritual Circe was doing.

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“Spirit, I command you,” she started, taking her hand off Luke’s shoulder and using it to open a small vial of some liquid. “The power of Christ compels you,” she said, sprinkling some of the liquid on the top of Luke’s head. “The Holy Spirit compels you to leave this body. This body is not yours. It was not given to you by our creator, and you are not allowed to take from our creator. Out!” She shouted the last word, and at the sound of her voice, the candles surrounding Luke all quivered. Caitlin gasped, and I didn’t blame her - if I couldn’t see ghosts and didn’t know that nothing had exited him, I probably would have done the same.

“You are not permitted to enter this body,” she continued, flipping open another vial and sprinkling the liquid onto the front of Luke’s shirt. “You are not permitted to enter any body on this property. You are to leave these humans be and go toward the light!”

“Luke?” a small voice said, and I sat up straighter. No shit, I thought, there was no chance in hell that this was actually working. But I looked around, and it was clear that no one else had heard the voice.

“Go toward your maker, and you will be reborn in his light!” Circe roared. Some of the candles surrounding Luke burned out, and as they did, Circe folded over, as though all of her energy had been wiped away. Caitlin immediately rushed over the candles on the ground and went to help support her as Circe panted heavily.

“It is done,” she wheezed between breaths. “When the candles blow out, it is the spirit using that energy to move toward their next life beyond.”

Bullshit, I thought, as Caitlin helped Circe back to the couch, where she immediately collapsed. She definitely hadn’t gotten rid of whatever was attached to Luke, but she had gotten it to react to him, which was more than what I was expecting her to be able to do, so I guess I had to give her props for that. Still, I was surprised that she was as exhausted as she seemed - she curled up on the sofa and seemed to immediately nod off.

“Well,” Liam said, making his way into the frame, “there you have it, folks! Another successful exorcism by the famous Circe! Everybody make sure you say ‘hi Circe’ in the comments!”

He hit a button on the camera in front of him, then turned back to Luke. “You okay dude? You look kind of pale.”

“I…I don’t know,” Luke said. I couldn’t see him very well from where I was standing, but I noticed that his voice was shaking, so I walked closer to him. Liam was right - instead of getting rid of a ghost, Luke looked like he’d just seen one. “We’ve done this before several times,” he said, looking to me as though I could better explain it (which, I suppose, if there was someone in the room who could, it would be me. Especially now that Circe was lighty snoring in the corner of the room), “and each time, we’ve had the oils and the lights and the drama, and it’s great for the video. But this time… I don’t even know how to explain it.”

Liam nodded. “You didn’t look like you took to it well this time.”

“I didn’t.” Luke held up his hands slightly and looked at the back of them. Even from where I was standing, I could see they were shaking slightly. “This time, I wasn’t thinking about metrics or anything. I was just… I don’t know, scared, I think?”

Liam looked over to me, and when I met his stare, it was clear he was trying to express something, but I wasn’t sure what. Quickly, he shifted his eyes back to Liam. “Like something had gone wrong with it?”

“No, I don’t think it was that,” Luke said slowly. “It was like something in me didn’t want the exorcism to happen, or like I was scared of what Circe was doing, even though it hasn’t really changed much.”

Liam nodded slowly, then turned to me. “What are your thoughts? What did you see?”

I bit my lip, unsure of how much I wanted to say with Circe right there, albeit asleep. Caitlin was right there, too, and seemed to have the utmost faith in Circe, although she wasn’t paying attention to any of us - she had instead just grabbed one of the cameras and started downloading the footage. “I didn’t see anything,” I finally decided on.

“Nothing?” Liam asked, and I shook my head in confirmation. “Did you see anything for previous spirits that you’ve helped move on?”

“Well, yes and no,” I explained. “I don’t really see any of the bright lights they see or anything, but they just kind of disappear.”

“And you’re saying that you didn’t see this in this case?” Luke asked. His hands were still shaking lightly, but he rubbed his hands through this hair in an attempt to cover it up.

“I’m saying that I didn’t see anything,” I said. “And that means whatever was in you is still in you.”