Novels2Search

10: Purpose

Thus, my feet carried me forward, following the steady stride of Miotu and Craig, their determined silhouettes already blazing a trail for the hero and I to follow. Their eagerness to warn the adventurer's guild was admirable.

Either that, or they just wanted to get out of here. Both cases were valid.

Hana, however, appeared anchored to her spot in the road, displaying a strange lack of intent to move. I glanced at her in an attempt to urge her on, but as I turned my gaze her way, I noticed something off about her. Her walking was slow and unsteady, like she was about to collapse at any moment. She teetered around until leaning against my arm for support, slowly looking up to meet my gaze. Her skin was clammy to the touch.

"Hey, are you alright?" I asked, concern starting to build. For a moment, I thought she might've been hurt in the battle, and I had missed it while I was unconscious.

But before I could contemplate any further, Hana's eyes found mine, drawing me in with an intensity that was impossible to resist. The world seemed to contort around her vivid blue eyes, ensnaring me like a fishing boat to a whirlpool. As I was sucked deeper and deeper into the abyss, her eyes slowly began to transmute into a dark shade of purple.

Then, the devastated scene of Alonzia vanished, and a series of images flickered through my mind—familiar scenes that I had witnessed countless times before.

...

My humble little home with its modest hearth lit aflame. My bed, not too tidy, but cozy all the same.

Beneath those warm memories, I sensed that Hana had rapidly formed a complex web of emotions tied to that little shack. They were feelings that told the chronology of her suffering, both of her life back home as well as her brief stay here. Bitterness, nostalgia, happiness, relief. Panic, emptiness, sorrow, then anger. So much anger. So much anger that it spilled from her spirit to mine, cracking the glass that gave her heart shape.

Hana’s unfiltered spirit flowed into mine, and I could feel that I was invading somewhere I shouldn’t. The purity of her soul's desires were not tainted by the complexity of thought, the seeds of doubt, or the twisting nature of outside pressure.

No, they simply were. They simply were her.

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The summoning was jarring and sudden.

I was in the air one moment, and then in the next, I was sitting atop a curious chalk drawing, surrounded by unfamiliar robed figures. Weirdly enough, they looked scared of me, like they had just watched a Dementor apparate into the room. I couldn't tell if I was more or less nervous knowing they were uncomfortable with my sudden appearance. Maybe they were just as confused as I was regarding the reason why I was here.

But they never elaborated why they reacted that way, and despite their clear discomfort, they housed me for the night, fed me, and gave me the rundown not only the current world I occupied, but also of my coming responsibility as the hero. It was simple. Defeat the Demon King and send him back to hell for another century or so. Easy, right?

"Now to meet your benefactors, as well as the people you'll be saving."

The next 24 hours were a blur. I was introduced to tons of new people, all of them treating me like the second coming of Christ. There were far too many faces to remember in that short period of time, and none of them stuck around for longer than a few minutes. They didn't even seem like they would teach me how to do any of what they were asking me to. They were more like investors, offering to buy me equipment in exchange for advertisement or loot from the Demon King's domain.

I didn't know how I felt about it. It all seemed like a little too much, and I was more than a little confused.

Don't get me wrong, it felt really good to be appreciated and treated like I meant something. The reason why I jumped was because I felt the exact opposite back at home. My life felt meaningless, and any efforts that I had made to combat that meaninglessness had only blown up in my face or disappointed me in the end. Right now, I was getting exactly what I thought I wanted. Recognition, fame, instant success.

So then why didn't I feel fulfilled? What more could I want from life, if not for the things I'd been chasing after for so long?

Maybe it was because I didn't even know what I meant to these people yet. The definition of hero to them was surely defined over the years, but to me, my role was ambiguous at best. I wasn't a light novel character. I was a real person with glaring mental and physical weaknesses. How would I even expect to defeat someone as ominous-sounding as the Demon King? Surely I couldn't do it in the traditional sense of beating him in direct combat.

They really expected Hana of the 'Southern Californias' to defeat a Satan allegory? Yeah, that'll go well for sure. These people really picked the right person for the job. I didn't know how to fight, use magic, or do anything that a hero might be expected to do, so clearly I was the correct choice.

'...'

That's when I realized why everything didn't feel right.

It felt like I was an impostor; like someone else should have been summoned instead of me. Maybe there really was someone capable of taking on the king of all evils, and I had somehow usurped their spot.

I hadn't accomplished anything worthy of note. It didn't seem even remotely possible that I was chosen.

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Yet, people were still fighting over me like a pack of wolves on fresh meat. Once I had been sent off to the guild to acquire party members, the guild receptionist actively had to tell people to back off and give me space, which I appreciated greatly. I think she may have suspected how little I was truly prepared for the role, so she tiptoed around talking to me, and instead focused on keeping the masses of the guild at bay. It felt like I was being babied, almost.

"Don't worry," she said. "I'll make sure we find someone capable to help you along the early stages of your journey. I promise everything will be just fine."

It was hard to doubt her, with how sure of herself she looked.

She clearly already had someone in mind. I wondered what they were like, to instill such confidence in her.

Fortunately I didn't have to wonder long. The person in question just casually showed up and took out the biggest man I'd ever seen. It was nothing short of unreal, how he moved around.

The guy looked average, but he was clearly talented in ways that I was not. I would be lying if I didn't feel some sort of resentment towards him initially.

The naturally gifted could go die in a hole. Didn't they know how hard some people had to work?

It was amazing how fast I came to such a ridiculous assumption. I knew I was just bitter, and yet I judged someone's character off of my biased view of what he had showed me in a little over a few seconds. Worse yet, I didn't even feel shame for doing so.

But then he showed me around the town. Overshared a little about his life. Made me feel at home. Then I realized why Claire had such faith in this guy. It wasn't his strength.

The guy was a dork. He was genuine, considerate, and supposedly hardworking.

He might have said some dumb shit when we first met, but he more than made up for it at the coffee place.

It was there that I learned what I saw wasn't talent. It was the result of a lifetime of dedication and training, and I only learned that because he wasn't afraid to lay his thoughts out on the table for me to see.

Long story short, he was the perfect person to introduce a new person to an unknown place. He made me feel welcome. Claire had chosen well.

That's probably why it was so easy for me to attach myself to this place so fast.

Here, in a far-off land, filled with swords and magic from my light novels, there stood a dingy, dilapidated house, owned by a young man who managed to be both unintentionally rude and endearingly considerate at the same time. Its walls were a patchwork of peeling paint and disintegrating wood, its windows hopping with dust bunnies, and its roof slumped under the weight of gravity. Yet, despite its desperate need for a woman’s touch, it had a charm and a character all its own.

It was loved dearly, even if the person who owned it didn’t quite know it. And I was sure he didn’t. He seemed kind of thick.

As I rested my eyes upon this shitty, timeworn shack for the first time, I couldn't help but feel a curious sense of connection. Like perhaps this was something I was always meant to experience, even if nothing like this existed on Earth for me.

At least, not in the way it did here.

Growing up in a strict family, I had always been bound by expectations and limitations, my every step shadowed by the ghosts of what others thought I should be. And I tread on those shadows religiously, never daring to step out of line. I knew all too well my parents’ love ended where my success did, never having supported anything that I really wanted to pursue.

And man, did my success end. It doesn't get much worse than being in hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt, dropping out of school, and becoming homeless. Or at least, I thought it didn't. I hoped it didn't.

But I was wrong. It only got worse, and with that misfortune came the intrusive thoughts, which was then followed by my eventual death.

Then, here, on the unfamiliar soil of Prithvi, I had a chance to break free from those shackles and forge a new path, one that was entirely my own, even if I had no fucking idea what that path might be. It's not like I was given the chance to think about it.

That would all, of course, come after I fulfilled a similar set of expectations that bounded me similarly in my previous life.

But at least this time, I had goal, and that goal was this:

I imagined myself standing before an equally shitty house as Sun's, the proud owner of a home to call my own. I envisioned the work I would put into it, tenderly breathing new life into the withered walls, mending the broken windows, and restoring the roof to its former glory.

This would be my sanctuary, a place where I could grow and learn and become the person I was always meant to be. Not the one I was expected to be. Where was the purpose in that?

Where was MY purpose?

Finally, I knew what it was.

It was to be free.

I would save this world with Sun at my side (I'd make him go with me), and then settle down as the hero who brought peace to all the lands. After that, who knows what I'd do? It'd all be up to me. I'd do anything I wanted to do.

For the very first time.

...

And yet, the chance had been stolen away in the blink of an eye.

She craved retribution, yearning to confront those who had wronged her and robbed her of the possibility of a life she had sought for so long. She knew that as long as they existed, she would never find peace. She would never be able to settle down. She would be exiled again. She would never find a home.

No, this time it was worse. She would actively be hunted down.

She was not going to let that define her life. Not again. That's why she reached out to me, even if it was purely by accident, desperately seeking a companion during the time she needed one most.

(Please help me, Sun,) she thought, a message finally whispered with intent. (And I will do my best to save your world.)

At that moment, a profound understanding washed over me, a sensation that transcended words or gestures.

Our minds had become entwined, our thoughts and emotions floating to and fro between our consciences. I could sense her innermost desires, fears, and dreams as vividly as if they were my own. It was a connection that defied the boundaries of the physical world, a bond forged in the deepest recesses of our consciousness. I could feel the warmth of her spirit and the strength of her will, and I knew she could sense the same within me.

Then, just as suddenly as it had begun, the intimate space within her spirit began to unravel.

The invisible threads that had linked our minds started to fray, and the vivid tapestry of our shared experience dissipated like fog swept away by the wind. The world around us came rushing back into focus, and I found myself standing once again in the familiar surroundings of Alonzia.

"You guys coming?" Craig was already heading out with Miotu hot on his tail.

Hana and I, who had been spacing out for some time now, answered swiftly and decisively.

"Yeah," we said in synchronization.

(We are ready.)