“Anyways, how my teacher taught me how to use BDM was to sit down and meditate. While meditating you’ll try your best to feel the Divinity inside you. Once you’re able to do that, you can try moving it around. You’ll have to do this for a while until you get a hang of it. Controlling it freely is no easy task. But… Controlling it while meditating, and while moving around, are two very different things. Being able to do the former does not mean you’ll be able to do the latter. But, the first step is to it while meditating, so let’s focus on that for now.” – Victor
“But how exactly am I supposed to ‘feel the Divinity inside me’? Not to mention manipulating it…” – Alex
“You remember how I said everything is made of Divinity right?” – Victor
“Yeah?” – Alex
“Well, you can think of it as a muscle inside your body. You just need to figure out how to flex that muscle. How exactly you do that, sadly isn’t something I can tell you; you just need to figure it out on your own. That’s the only way.” – Victor
After he says that, I nod, and sit down.
I close my eyes and try to imagine flexing a muscle in my body that isn’t really there.
Nothing is happening…
---
A few hours have passed, and I haven’t made any progress yet.
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It doesn’t seem possible.
How can I flex a muscle that isn’t there?!
It just doesn’t make any sense…
“Ugh! This is impossible!” – Alex
“…” – Victor
Wow…
Here I am working my ass off, while Vic is sleeping…
“Victor!” – Alex
He shoots up and with a confused look, he scans the area around him.
“Huh?!” – Victor
“I said, it’s impossible!” – Alex
“…” – Victor
“What?” – Alex
“Well… It’s clearly not impossible, you saw me do it just a little while ago.” – Victor
Haha, very funny Vic…
“You know what I mean. I’m sitting here and trying to flex a muscle that isn’t actually there, just like you said, but it doesn’t work…” – Alex
“That’s not what I said. That ‘muscle’ is there. You just don’t know how to use it yet.” – Victor
“That’s pretty much the same thing.” – Alex
“Well, not really. If I told you to flex the muscles in a third arm you would never be able to do it, because it’s not there. But flexing the muscles in your other two arms is very much possible, even if you for some reason didn’t know you had them. So don’t think of it as flexing a muscle that isn’t there, but rather a muscle that you just didn’t know was there.” – Victor
I sit down again.
Maybe if I try to flex all muscles in my body I’ll accidentally also ‘flex’ the Divinity?
--- Another couple of hours passes.
I have been trying many different things the last few hours.
I tried flexing my entire body.
I tried imagining my hand was glowing like his did.
I tried moving the air around in my lungs.
I tried hitting a tree and just hoping that my body would instinctively protect itself by strengthening my hand.
That clearly didn’t work, and my hand is bloody…
I asked Vic if he could lightly flick me while using BDM to make my body more used to the feeling of Divinity.
Nothing seems to be working.
This is much harder than I expected…
After a few more hours of trying out everything I could think of, it’s finally night and it’s time to go to bed.
Maybe I’ll have better luck tomorrow?
The day was long and I’m absolutely exhausted.
I instantly fell asleep...