1st November:

Today, in Defence Against the Dark Arts, I noticed Henry Blaise was sharing our class. Henry is a Prefect, and the only Slytherin 7th year. He sometimes has classes with us, because there are no other members of our House in his year. I suddenly felt more hopeful than I usually am in this class - that's because usually when Henry is sharing a class with us, it's going to be something interesting.

I was not disappointed. Professor Livia started teaching us how to cast the Patronus charm! None of us were able to do much more than produce a small, silvery light; but Professor Livia said it's very rare to master it, or cast a full-bodied Patronus. She's going to continue instructing us over November and December, and beyond. For the first time in as long as I can remember, I'm actually excited for DADA classes!

I wonder what form my Patronus will take?

Second Week of November:

We're still learning how to cast a Patronus in DADA, but in this class today, we did duelling again.

This time, I was surprised to discover that we Slytherins would be doing the blocking, and the Gryffindors were going to be doing the casting.

We haven't had any practise at blocking yet, so I couldn't help feeling nervous. I was thinking it was a good thing I already knew a bit about shield charms, though I haven't practised much... at least, not against an actual opponent.

We were paired into groups of 2 again. Gryffindor Vs Slytherin.

I was paired with a boy called Silas. He walked up to me and introduced himself. He had black eyes, dark hair and this sort of mischievous smile. He also happened to be very attractive, but I had a really strange feeling about him, and I don't think it was just because he was good-looking. My heart started racing, and I suddenly felt extremely anxious for no reason. It made me lose track of what I was doing. I must have looked like an idiot, just standing there.

I briefly heard him say something, but it just sounded like mumbling. I don't know if I have ever felt quite this way before. I was just staring blankly in his general direction, and I'd completely forgotten what it was that I was supposed to be doing. Then I felt something else. De ja vous. Like I'd seen him before, like I knew him somehow!

"Surely I'd remember someone like that?"I was thinking, and it was while I was processing all of this in slow motion, that the real world time left me behind, and the next thing I knew, I was on the floor, under a table, with chairs on top of me.

I heard laughter coming from the Gryffindors, and as I pulled myself up from the mess of chairs, I noticed Dominic was laughing too, the traitor!

I hadn't even thought about blocking. Of course - that is what he had been saying, but I hadn't been listening, his voice had been blurred out by the loudness of my own mind - he had told me to watch out and get ready.

I noticed he had extended a hand to me, and it took more than a few seconds for me to register what I was supposed to do next. I took his hand, and he pulled me up. I suddenly felt dizzy and sick, but also like I had conflicting emotions churning around inside me.

This time, I decided to be ready!

"Focus, this time,"he was explaining to me,"I'm going to give you plenty of warning, so be ready; three - two - one. Depulso!"

I suppose that was what he hit me with when I flew into the desks and chairs the first time. Unfortunately I wasn't quick enough. I found myself flying backwards once more. Only this time, I was more painfully in the moment, landing on the bruises I had already obtained.

"What's the matter, Carrow?"this time it was Professor Livia addressing me,"this is what you get when you don't pay attention in class. You should listen to me. If you can't successfully block a spell by the end of this lesson, I'm taking twenty points from Slytherin! Now get up, and go back!"

I picked myself up off the floor, and nervously returned to my area of the arena. I faced Silas, but I was scared this time. Being thrown backwards twice does kind of make you not want to get flung backwards a third time. I anxiously tried to remember the blocking spell, but it had gone completely from my head, and panic was rising up like a wall in front of ordinary brain function.

"Think! Think! Think!"I was telling myself, but I was only telling myself to think, and beyond that, there was no actual thinking.

"You ready, Carrow?"I heard Silas saying,"I'll go easy on you, this time; three, two, one!"

I felt dazed, lost, I realised I was sitting on the floor. This time, he had hit me with a stunning spell.

"Get up!"that was Professor Livia yelling at me.

Before I even tried to get up, Silas had lifted me into a standing position.

"Could you show me again how to do the - how to - how to block?"I asked Professor Livia, fumbling my words, feeling like an utter idiot.

I could hear the Gryffindors laughing around me, and I could feel my cheeks burning red, which made it even worse!

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Professor Livia demonstrated the spell. I watched, careful. I tried to listen with all of my brain (though, for some reason, this is never a thing with me, things go in one ear and out the other, and then I remember them 3 hours later). This time, I tried really hard.

"Just go with the flow,"I told myself.

This is something I've learned helps when I try to focus on something difficult and can't seem to do it.

I watched what she did, then I prepared myself. I faced Silas.

"Three - two - one!"he warned me.

I blocked his spell this time.

All the other Slytherins clapped, and I realised this duel had been the last one. Everyone else, having performed adequately, had finished their practise for class and had all been watching me and Silas. I didn't know whether to feel supported or patronised (especially when I saw Antonius clapping). The Gryffindors weren't clapping, they were just laughing.

I looked back at Silas, he was clapping too, but he also had a menacing smile,"see you round, Carrow!"he said.

I don't know why, but the way he said it sent shivers down my spine.

I've definitely met him before, even though I don't remember it. I've been at Hogwarts 6 years, he's been in all the classes we've had with the Gryffindors in that time, but I've never really paid him much attention until now. I've seen him around; in the distance, in the background, but I can't shake the feeling that I know him from more than just - that!

Later:

The 5 of us Carrows siblings met again in our "castle" up in the trees. When we're in there, we're invisible too, it's the perfect hiding place, though there was one flaw. When I was on my way there, I saw a disembodied head floating at the top of the second oak, above Wise Wizard's Watch - it was Anita.

I made sure to let her know that her disembodied spectre could be seen floating above the trees, and she instantly turned to Ed for advice.

While Ed and Anita had gone off to examine the lookout-tower, I realised it was just Lotty and I in the main part of our treehouse.

"Lotty?"I asked,"do you know a boy in Gryffindor called Silas? A 6th year?"

"Silas Warren,"Lotty answered, and she didn't look happy as she said it,"yeah - I know who he is. He's the one that founded the gang I told you about."

"Is he really?"I asked, surprised.

"Yup,"said Lotty,"he's one of the worst! He acts like some general commanding an army, or something. I don't like him. Why do you want to know?"

"I had to duel him in Defence Against the Dark Arts today,"I said.

"I hope you beat him!"Lotty said.

"Well, no - he beat me, actually,"I said.

"I bet he enjoyed that!"Lotty said,"you need to beat him next time, or you're not worthy of being my sister!"

"Lotty!"I gasped.

Lotty started laughing, then she said,"maybe we should practice duelling?"

I agreed that would be a good idea, just as Anita and Ed were returning from the lookout tower.

"Practising duelling?"Anita said,"count me in!"

"Um - Anita, you've barely started school..."I began.

"I built THIS, didn't I?"Anita said, indignantly,"I disguised myself as a mermaid in the Black Lake, I..."

"Ah - Anita's long list of achievements,"I heard Jared saying, peeking up from the trapdoor entrance.

"You're late!"I said.

"Well, I had some things to do on the way,"Jared said, pulling himself up into the treehouse,"you know - things to take care of."

"What sort of things?"Ed asked.

"Oh - you know - things,"Jared casually answered,"things I would rather people didn't know about."

Jared is like that. He likes to make himself seem mysterious, like he's living some secret double life and he's doing loads of interesting, but less-than-above-board things. It must all be completely ordinary, of course, and certainly not secret, or he wouldn't be telling us 'hints' like he does.

We began discussing the idea of duelling practise with each other. Lotty knows some spells that I don't, and Ed knows a lot - though he says he's never actually put them into practice, only read about them. Jared claims to be a duelling expert, but I suppose we'll find out whether or not that's true soon enough!

Before returning to Hogwarts, we tested out Ed's upgrade of Wise Wizard's Watch. This time, there were no floating heads, even when all of us tried, testing out our different heights.

We still had some free time, after this. Lotty and I decided to practice flying for a bit. Lotty wants to get into the Gryffindor Quidditch Team. She has always been brilliant at sports, and she's passionate about Quidditch. I hope she does get in. At least then, when they win time and time again, like usual, I can be pleased about Lotty winning, instead of disappointed about us losing.

But it was while we were flying around above the school grounds, that we suddenly saw 3 people flying towards us. A girl and 2 boys. One of them was a Hufflepuff, and the other two were Gryffindors. They flew straight at us!

"What are you doing?"I yelled, dodging out of the way.

"Pure-blood scum!"one of the boys yelled, and he threw something over us both. I'm not sure what it was, but one thing I know was that I was falling - falling - falling... there was some kind of dust in my eyes, I couldn't see, I expected to hit the ground, and then...

"Arresto Momentum!"someone cried.

I was suspended in the air, a few feet from the ground, so was Lotty, though she was above me. Then the spell wore off, and I crashed onto the soft, muddy ground, as the sound of laughter died off into the distance.

"What was that?"I gasped, sitting up, I turned to Lotty,"are you ok?"I began.

Lotty's broom was broken. Possibly beyond repair. She was on the verge of tears.

"Why would they do this?"she whispered.

I saw tears welling in her eyes. I realised, suddenly, how much this means to her. She wants to get into the Quidditch Team, and this will have ruined that - she won't be able to participate in the Quidditch trials without her broom - unless?

"Lotty - you can have mine,"I offered,"they probably only targeted us because I was with you, anyway."

"No,"Lotty said,"you need it."

"You can have it until you get a replacement,"I said,"mine's better than yours, anyway, and I've never been able to use it to it's full potential. In the meantime, we can try to fix yours."

"No,"Lotty insisted,"if I have yours, then they'll just break that one too."

"Why?"I said,"they've been bullying you?"

Lotty was looking at the ground.

"They've been bullying you, haven't they!"I went on,"the cowards!"

"Shh! No,"said Lotty,"it's not all that bad. I'll be fine. Don't worry about me."

"You should have my broom!"I persisted,"if they break it, so what? That's not on you, that's on them!"

"But..."Lotty went on.

"Take it,"I said, giving it to her,"it's yours until you have a replacement."

Lotty reluctantly accepted it.

"Go on, Lotty, get into the Gryffindor Quidditch Team!"I said.

Lotty blinked back tears,"that's just it,"she said,"I don't - they might not let me in."

"Why? If you practise enough, and I know you can fly well, I've seen you!"I went on.

"It's just - I don't think they will, because - because I'm a Carrow,"Lotty said.

"Well, then you just have to try your absolute best!"I encouraged her,"be so good, that they can't help but let you in, Carrow or no Carrow, you can show them!"

Lotty smiled weakly,"I'm not sure that's how it works, but I can try,"she said.