"[You're slooow!]" Aorutihaua flies circles around the Chaos carrier while nagging about my speed. At first I thought they were the stoic type once they put on their full helm, but apparently, that isn't the case once they also wear the Golden Shawl that allows them to fly.
"[We're above the ocean, so I can't just experiment with my form.]" I reply through my avatar sitting on top of the balloon next to Tahiri. Last time I tried recreating a jet plane, it flipped me over, so I'm not too keen on trying it with passengers and out over the sea. If that means it'll take a while longer, then that's how it is.
"[Boo...]" The Child of the Sun makes, and I can imagine them pouting underneath that black helmet.
"[So, where were we?]" I turn to the God of Storm and try to pick up our conversation from before we were interrupted by the childishness of the little god buzzing about the airship like an annoying fly.
"[You were asking about how to make up with Tokomaha.]" Tahiri replies with a knowing grin.
"[Ah... yeah.]" I scratch my cheek bashfully. Normally, I wouldn't really want to ask for advice in regards to relationship issues, but somehow I feel that Tokomaha deserves better treatment from me. While it's true that I don't like those who act hard to get or just can't be honest with their feelings that are obvious to everyone else, the God of Growth has grown on me.
I know I shouldn't do it, but the comparison with Aurelia comes quite easily; they're both very prideful. After last night with the golden girl, I understand that she isn't shy and clearly knows what she wants, but has high standards that I need to uphold if I want to stay with her. Tokomaha, on the other hand, hasn't made anything clear - aside from enjoying being taken for a ride seemingly one-sidedly.
"[Have you tried talking to her?]" The God of Storm states in a matter of fact tone.
"[You make it sound simple.]" I lie down and place my head on her lap casually. She doesn't mind and looks down at me with a raised eyebrow while regarding my question.
"[Because it is.]" With a shrug, she replies. "[Why does everybody have to make things complicated? Everything can be resolved through talking. Action comes only when either side thinks that there are no other options.]"
I don't think she's referring to relationship problems with that last line of hers. It sounds more like something applicable to altercations, be it between individuals or nations. Though I guess it's true to a certain extent; I should have a talk with Tokomaha before anything else.
"[Guess I'll give it a try.]" I sit up from Tahiri's lap and turn to smile at her.
"[Always happy to help.]" She returns it and takes a gulp from her jug of alcohol.
"[Thank you.]" My avatar melts into the balloon while waving at her, and she waves back.
I form from the ceiling of the bridge and slowly come down. Everybody is in their own rooms, so it's empty in here. Since this ship is literally just me, there are no instruments or a steering wheel, so I don't have to check for any course errors or malfunctions. Looking around, I wonder why I came here rather than go directly to Tokomaha's room.
Then again, I should go there and knock, rather than drop in without announcing myself. It worked last time because she was in the right mood for it, but currently, she won't be happy if I do that.
Thus, I physically walk through the central corridor of the living quarters and go to the little goddess' room, even though I can move through the walls easily. Need to keep some semblance of normalcy even for someone like me.
"[It's me.]" I knock on her door and call out to her. There's no reply, and for a second I wonder whether she's asleep or not in. But before I can form an eye on the other side of the door, I hear something from inside. Don't tell me she was masturbating again or something.
The door opens, and Tokomaha is standing there, looking up at me with defiant eyes. There are no signs of her having cried recently or anything like that, but it's clear that she's been upset since this morning.
This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.
"[What do you want?]" She asks me in an abrasive tone, and I forcefully step into the room, causing her to stagger back. "[Hey, what are you-]"
I close the door behind me and look at the little goddess with intent eyes. She realizes her situation and is feeling nervous, but there's also a hint of anticipation in her eyes. Then she notices her own thoughts and shakes her head to clear it. Apparently, she doesn't want this to go like the last few times when I basically forced myself on her.
Neither do I.
"[I've come to apologize.]" I finally say. Normally, this is where I would bow deeply, but I hold myself back from following my instincts. This nation doesn't have that kind of custom other than for people to show subservience to others. That's not the message I want to give her. "[My words this morning were out of line.]"
Tokomaha doesn't say anything and avoids eye contact. She's not making this easy; I'm making some concessions here, so she should at least reply. But the fact that she didn't just ignore me or slam the door on me when she saw me on the other side means that she's willing to at least listen to me.
"[There's something I have to tell you.]" I think this might be the first time I'm having this talk in such a straightforward way. So far, I've taken my situation with the girls for granted, especially because Kamii and Hestia were always so devoted and silently accommodating. Even Aurelia has shown understanding, though she did attach a rule.
I begin by telling Tokomaha about the girls waiting somewhere on the other side of the world, and how I've been living my life so far. Throughout, her face shows a wide range of expressions, but I can see from her reactions to my mention of other girls that she does disapprove of it. That's not good.
"[What do you think of me now?]" When I'm done, I let the little goddess decide.
She looks up at me with her amber eyes, her gaze unwavering. But it only lasts for a moment, before she looks away with a difficult expression. She's remained silent ever since I first started talking, and that hasn't changed even now. Walking over to the bed and plopping down on it, Tokomaha cradles her legs and seems to be deep in thought.
I remain standing in the center of the room where she left me and wait. This will need some time, I think, but that's what we have plenty of right now. Unlike all the others before, it seems that she's really thinking about what it means to share me with somebody else - especially with as many as four or more others.
The problem I have is that I believe each one of them deserves my full attention, but at the same time, I can't leave them all for any single one. While it would be frowned upon or even hated if I were in a shounen harem story, this here is my reality. I never thought things would get to the point where this could happen to me. But I also never thought I would be reincarnated as a cosmic horror, so there's that.
"[Chaos...]" Finally, Tokomaha looks up and speaks in a quiet voice. She pauses for a moment, and there's silence once again. I try not to look too eager to hear her words so that she doesn't feel any pressure to continue. Then, while looking straight into my eyes, she says what I didn't know I needed to hear right now. "[I love you...]"
If I had a heart in this form, it would have skipped ten beats. I know that she'll say something after this, but for now, I'm really happy that she feels this way about me.
"[I don't like it.]" She says with a miffed sideways glance. Huh, she doesn't like the fact that she loves me? "[That I have to share you. I don't like it.]" As if she noticed the ambiguity of her statement, she explains her words. "[But it seems that if I want to stay with you, I'll have to accept it.]"
I have to hold myself back from saying the wrong thing here. In a way, I wanted to say that she shouldn't have to accept it if it hurts her inside. I'm sure she could find somebody devoted only to her. But at the same time, I understand the feeling of loving a person so much that you don't want to let them go. Only that for me, it applies to several people.
"[So promise me at least one thing.]" Tokomaha focuses on me and the determination in her gaze surprises me; it reminds me of Aurelia's expression on the bridge yesterday. "[That when you're with me, you won't look at anybody else.]"
They're basically the same words as the golden girl's. Her sentiment is understandable, and I can get behind that promise just like I did with Aurelia's. I won't make the same kind of joke with the little goddess though since it seems like that admittance took a lot from her. She won't be able to handle me making insensitive jokes right now.
"[Thank you.]" I walk over to Tokomaha and lean in on her while placing a hand on her cheek. "[I promise.]"
Then, for the first time, I kiss her lips properly, as a lover would. I remembered that during all our escapades we never shared a heartfelt kiss. The first time I met her, I forced my prolonged tongue into her mouth as part of her punishment, and every single time afterward, our lips never even touched.
Now that I think about it, I never really let her feel my appreciation for her properly. I'm going to mend that now and shower her with my love.
When we separate, she looks up at me with glazed eyes and breathes heavily. I didn't notice the passage of time during our connection, but apparently it was quite long. However, this is far from over, and I need to give her more to convey my feelings for her.
I gently push her down onto the bed and bring my lips to hers again.