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Death Procession
Chapter 8: Me, Myself, And I

Chapter 8: Me, Myself, And I

With anticipation, the nameless slime opens his status screen, admiring the improvements in his stats. The greatest surprise for him is the discovery that he managed to generate some mana. However, the pitiful amount left him with a feeling of disappointment. Despite his maximum mana having risen to three, he has only managed to generate one one-thousandth of a mana point. He sighs. “Well, I guess it’s better than nothing.” Thinking to himself in contemplation, he gazes at the pitiful amount of mana in his possession. “Well, it looks like my mana regen is either slow or the amount is unbelievably pitiful. I guess it’s better than nothing.” Looking back at his improving stats again, he considers their growth rate. “If I continue to gain stats at my current rate, I only need to eat another seventeen mana grass to reach one in both intellect and wisdom.” However, he did consider that there was no guarantee that his stats would continue to increase at the current rate.

Concern ran through his mind, realizing that he did not even know how or why he was gaining stats from the plants in the first place. “Could it be a property of the plant or a property of being a slime?” Considering his knowledge, pondering the idea for a moment, he shakes off the thoughts, returning to his original intention, ignoring this growing concern. “I don’t know enough yet, and at the moment, I have more pressing concerns to address.” Considering his options for a moment, he makes a decision. “Guess I’ll give it a try. What’s the worst that could happen.” Releasing a nervous chuckle to himself. His assumption was a lot could go wrong with his plan, but he ignored these nagging concerns.

He had long since decided that he needed a way to see or at least a way to perceive the surroundings, and there was no backing out now. Having no eyes or other sensory organs meant seeing in the traditional sense was out of the question. With conventional methods of sight out of the question, his only option was to develop a skill that could serve as his eyes. He could gain a lot of information by feeling the environment and the objects around him, but that required him to touch the things he was trying to identify. He could tell his sense of touch was improving the more he used it, but it would leave him vulnerable if the object or entity he was trying to identify had hostile intentions or something that attacked him outright. Needing a better option and considering the limited information at his disposal, he came to a simple conclusion. “I need an extrasensory skill.”

While considering his options for this endeavor, a few key points influenced his final decision. First, Winter stated that slimes would try to consume the ambient mana around them. This implication meant that mana was present in the very air of the world. Second, mana grass, based on its name and the effect it can induce on his body, implies that it contains a large quantity of mana. This curiosity had many far-reaching implications that he did not want to consider for now, but the simplest and most important is that even something as simple as grass can possess mana. The last consideration came from his original world. In his world, some creatures did not need their eyes to perceive their surroundings. As a result, he believes that he should be able to do something similar, at least in theory.

His knowledge on the subject was limited, but he knew that snakes could taste the air, while bats, dolphins, and whales use echolocation, but those were not the creatures he wanted to imitate. While he did not know how it worked, he did know that there were fish that could use electrolocation to perceive their surroundings, most notably sharks. “If I remember right, there are two types of electrolocations, active and passive. Passive electrolocation senses the electrical fields emitted by the surrounding creatures, while active electrolocation emits a field around the fish and detects fluctuations in that field. I have no way to sense electrical fields, but I have mana. If I can make a manalocation skill, it will solve all of my problems or at least one of them.” He muses to himself in thought. The only question is, how will he accomplish such a feat?

The nameless little slime directed his thoughts towards the system. “Any chance you’ll tell me how to create a manalocation skill?” He quips mentally at the system, which remains silent. “Guess that’s a no. Well, here’s hoping this works.” Sighing in annoyance, he turns his attention to the matter at hand. Taking a deep breath, he stops using his sense of touch skill, plunging him into a state of complete sensory deprivation, leaving him drifting through the black abyss of his mind. Taking a few deep breaths to center his mind, he stops breathing, canceling his mana cycling skill. Mentally, he knew he did not need to breathe, but the sensation was distressing. Fighting against his sense of self-preservation was a daunting task, taking what seemed like hours to settle his mind, but in reality, it had only been a few minutes. He was unsure whether going this far was necessary, but this would ensure no external distractions, allowing him to focus his mind solely on the upcoming task.

Relaxing his mind, he falls into the black void of his mind, reaching out with his senses, searching for his internal mana, the abyss dragging him deeper as time passes. In the endless abyss of his mind, his efforts to sense his mana span for what seems like hours as the void distorts his sense of time. Spiraling into the black abyss for what seems like an eternity, despite his best efforts, his minuscule amount of mana makes his endeavor virtually impossible, causing him to feel helpless as the abyss pulls at the edges of his mind, chipping away at his sanity and sense of reality. “This isn’t working. Try something else.” A sudden jolt shakes off the feeling of despair, forcing him to refocus his mind. Thinking back to his status sheet, he considers his options. “Maybe I’m going about this the wrong way. Health and energy are more than three times the size of my mana pool, and the current amount is a thousand times bigger.” With a new determination, he focuses on the idea of the two energies, sinking deeper into the mental abyss of his mind.

Falling through the black abyss of his mind, reaching out in a desperate attempt to sense anything, an unknowable amount of time passes as the void continues to eat away at his perception of time and reality, warping his mind. Now, tumbling through the empty abyss, the futility of his endless search is apparent in his mind, but he continues, the reason behind his actions eluding his thoughts, staying just out of reach like a fading dream. “I was searching for something, but what was it? Why can’t I see anything? I need to get out of here, but how? Where’s the exit?” Looking around in the dark, searching for an exit, his focus on the endless search slips. “No! Stay focused on the mission. But what is the mission? It’s important; keep looking. But why? I don’t want to be here anymore. I want to go home. Everything is gone; stay focused on the mission, soldier. There is no better chance than now; if this fails, there may be no second chance. Keep reaching out for the energy; it’s here, it’s close. I can’t do this anymore. I’m tired. Just a little rest. No! It’s so close, just a little further. Keep searching.”

He spirals through the dark abyss, his mind fracturing on the verge of collapse, until a wash of sensation hits his mind, drawing and focusing his attention to a single point. After what seemed like an eternity in the bottomless abyss of his mind, with only his thoughts to keep him company, he could finally feel something. His thoughts coalesce on the sensation, pulling his mind back from the brink of oblivion and complete insanity. Turning the sensation over in his mind, searching for words to describe what he was feeling, and in the end, he could only describe it as the essence of his being. His mind continues to clear, pulling the scattered fragments of his mind to this one point of focus. “I found it?” His thoughts continue to clear, sharpening as he investigates the new sensation.

Focusing on the essence, over what felt like hours or even perhaps days, he could discern that this essence was energy, his energy. Continuing his intricate study of the essence, he could feel that it was not just one solid thing but a swirling mass of energy. Focusing on the swirling mass, he tries with an obsessive glee to comprehend the mysteries of this new sensation. Time passes with little concern for him. His obsession over the only sensation in the black abyss consumes his thoughts, giving him an anchor to stabilize his mind and thoughts. “This is amazing! I can’t believe I wanted to give up when I was so close to such an amazing discovery.” Spending time investigating the mass of swirling energy pulls his mind back from the brink of a complete mental collapse. However, despite his stabilizing mental state, his obsession with the essence only grows.

The little slime spent what could be hours, days, or even weeks focusing on the mass of energy, time becoming meaningless in the face of his obsession. As time passes like the flow of a meandering river to nowhere, he realizes that the mass of energy is, in fact, three intrinsically linked energies. He stops, pulling back, observing the swirling mass with confusion. “It’s as if they are different parts of a hole yet the same, but at the same time distinct.” Focusing on the flow of the energies as they twist and swirl around each other, his understanding grows by the second, allowing him to gauge the differences between the three energies little by little.

Analyzing the three energies, he finds that, of the three energies, two are similar in size and intensity. However, the feeling they give off is nothing alike, marking them as two distinctly different forms of energy, connected but different. Continuing his obsessive study, he concentrates on the third energy, finding that it is half the size of its two siblings; however, the severely diminished intensity concerns him. The intensity of the small energy is one-third of what he expected, even when accounting for the size difference. “It’s almost like it’s wounded or something.” He pauses, taking a mental step back from the mass of energy. A revelation struck him like a lightning bolt, bringing everything into focus. He was sensing his physical health, physical energy, and core health. “If I’m right, that means these are my stats, and they are, in some fashion, linked.” He observes the swirling mass, thoughts racing through his mind, considering the implications of this information. “The energies function as one thing, but they’re different at the same time, and there is a link holding this mass together, but how? In video games, health is derived from or modified by your constitution stat; could it be that simple?” He questions, contemplating everything he has learned up to this point.

Intrigued by the discovery, he dives deeper into the mysteries of the energies. He could feel that the energies are linked, but his question is how. Exhilarated by the new mystery, he ignores his growing fatigue, driven by his curiosity and intent on understanding how these three energies, while distinct in their own right, were fundamentally linked. The meaningless flow of time marches on in the abyss of his mind as he delves deeper into his studies, and the further he falls into his obsession, the more his understanding grows. “The swirling mass of energy is my essence, constitution, my very being, and the different parts make up the hole.” He finds that his physical health and energy are not linked directly together but indirectly through his core. This idea gives him pause because it implies that if his core health is attacked directly or depleted, he will die regardless of how high his physical health and energy are.

Thoughts race through his mind at this revelation, striking him with another concern. “What if I run out of energy; would it start consuming my core health? Could I die from depleting my physical energy?” He takes a mental step back to calm his mind, realizing it makes sense. “If we think of my core as a combination of a brain and heart, things fall into place. If I were to push my body past the point of exhaustion, it would negatively affect my health, and if the body were to degrade past the point where it could sustain function, it would do the same.” The thought sent a chill through him. “I need to be careful. If my energy or health reaches zero, it may eat into my core health at best, and at worst, I may lose consciousness or die. Either way, I would probably die.”

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A sudden wave of fatigue washes over the little slime; his mind spins as his thoughts become sluggish. His persistent focus on the mass of swirling energy stretched on for an unknowable amount of time, his sense of time distorted and warped by the black abyss of his mind, allowing him time to comprehend the energy’s form, structure, and function, but the mental toll on his mind was not small. The backlash of this mental toll hits like a wave, disrupting his focus and thoughts, shrouding his mind in a fog. His muddled mind obstructs his ability to sense the energy, causing the feeling to slip from his grasp. A feeling of urgency jolts through his mind, and with desperate determination and sheer strength of will, he pulls his mind back into focus, honing back in on the sense of the energy. “No, I can’t stop yet. There are too many things I need to try.” Pushing the mental fatigue aside, he keeps marching forward, but the progress of his understanding is slowing as the mental fatigue continues to pile up.

He directs his attention back to the three energies, focusing on them, the mental fog driven from his mind for the moment. Despite being able to focus his mind, he could tell time was running short. Disappointment and concern creep into his mind, realizing he will not have time to develop a mana-sensing skill. He quickly discards the thoughts, deciding that being able to sense physical health and energy is a far more impressive boon than he had initially planned. Pausing in complete shock, he realizes that he has not gained any skills since the start of this endeavor. “Why have I not gained any skills?” He curses to himself. “I can sense the energies; that’s good enough for now.” He pushes the nagging thoughts and concerns aside, his time growing short, focusing on the smallest of the three energies. “My core has not healed ever since it was damaged.” He stops, his thoughts catching in his mind, a thought striking him like a truck. “Winter said the damage I took was damage to my soul…” He stares blankly at the small source of energy. “Is this my soul? Can I sense souls?”

Pushing this revelation aside, he focuses back on his original task. “All the more reason to see if this works.” Concern hangs heavy in his mind, but he ignores it, blocking out the unnecessary thoughts and focusing on the feeling of his physical energy, or at least what he believes is his physical energy. Straining his focus, he tries to exert his will over the energy. In the desperate attempt to manipulate his energy, time passes in the black abyss, his mental fatigue pilling up, muddling his thoughts. With a burst of frustration and annoyance, he screams into the void of his mind. “Just move! There’s not enough time for this. No, keep focusing a little longer. Completing this is too important to fail. Feel the energy, its form, and its flow through the body. Keep going just a little bit more.” He sighs internally, calming his mind, focusing on the energy, sensing its form, and following the flow as it travels through his body. “Just nudge it a little.” Little by little, the energy begins to shift, flowing towards his core, trickling in bit by bit until it becomes a flood, but to his disappointment, there is no immediate change.

Elated with the success, he maintains the flow of physical energy into his core, keeping his senses peeled for changes. “Even if this does not work like I hope, at least I can manipulate my energy now.” His efforts, while simple, are an attempt to use his physical energy to heal his damaged core. The assumption, while simply wild speculation, is that if the two energies are linked, it may be possible to use one to heal or replenish the other’s depleted energy. While this is simple conjecture on his part, being able to flow his physical energy into his core proves the concept is a limited success. Now he waits with bated breath, the strain on his mind becoming more overbearing by the second, to see if his physical energy will heal his damaged core. However, despite the passage of time, the damage to his core health, or perhaps his soul, has yet to recover even a fraction of the damage sustained.

Despite the staggering amount of energy pouring into his core, he saw no substantial change in the intensity of his core, worrying him. Time passes in the endless void, the only marker of its passage, the flow of his physical energy pouring into his core as though it were a bottomless pit. His mind felt heavy, confusion creeping into his mind as he persisted with the endeavor, his exhaustion weighing heavy on his fracturing mind. “Why am I still doing this? Keep going, don’t stop so soon. Why? Can’t you see it, look closely?” Trying in desperation to focus, straining his senses in a futile attempt to maintain the flow of energy. He suddenly felt a jolt, yanking his mind into focus as though being pulled by an unseen force. Focusing his mind on his core, he notices an improvement in its intensity. It was not a massive change, but it was a change nonetheless. “What? When did that happen?” He exclaimed in surprise.

His core’s condition was improving; it was slow, and the improvement so far was minuscule, but his gamble worked. To his surprise and horror, the energy consumption was staggering. From what he could sense, the energy consumption was around three or four times what it was restoring to his core. “Why does it take so much energy for such a small return? Perhaps it’s because of the way I’m introducing the energy. I’m essentially doing nothing more than pouring energy into my core without understanding what I’m doing. Effectively, I’m trying to brute force a healing method. Or, it could just take that much energy; who knows? That makes sense, I guess.” He stops pouring energy into his core, exhausting a third of his physical energy during the process, but that quantity of energy only restored his core’s health by one-fifth. The process made him feel physically tired, his mental exhaustion weighing heavy, his thoughts scattering in the mental fog, threatening to scatter his conciseness at any moment.

“I need to get out of here.” His mind swims, his focus breaking under the weight of the mental fatigue, his consciousness slipping, threatening, at any moment, to fail. Trying to clear the fog from his mind, he mentally shakes his head. “I need to stay focused.” His mind continues to reel, his consciousness falling deeper into the mental abyss, drowning in the mental fog. His thoughts and consciousness fade, dispersing into the dark abyss until he feels an abrupt pull. Unable to perceive or respond to the mysterious force dragging him from the abyss at a pace that made his fading mind spin. He takes a deep, gasping breath as he is forcefully ejected from the abyss, his mind reeling from the experience. The mental fog hangs in his mind, obscuring his thoughts, his mental exhaustion taking a heavy toll. As time passes, his mind begins to clear, and with a desperate determination, he forces his mind to focus, attempting to understand the all too familiar voice of the system ringing like a gong in his mind.

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Attention Level Two].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Attention Level Three].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Energy Sense Level One].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Energy Sense Level Two].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Energy Sense Level Three].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Life Sense Level One].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Life Sense Level Two].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Life Sense Level Three].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Soul Sense Level One].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Soul Sense Level Two].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Soul Sense Level Three].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Hunch Level One].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Ponder Level One].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Energy Manipulation Level One].

Congratulations, you have gained the skill [Minor Soul Recovery Level One].

Congratulations, [Mental Energy] has been added to your status.

Error, unable to calculate maximum [Mental Energy].

Error, [Mental Energy] exceeds intelligence stat.

Error, unable to display [Mental Energy].

Error, [Mental Energy] set to [Unknown].

Status condition [Mental Fatigue] gained.

Status condition [Mental Fatigue] removed.

Status condition [Mental Exhaustion] gained.

Status condition [Mental Fracture] gained.