Walking through the desert with a heavy heart, the sand is everywhere as far as the eye can see.

The eternal tormentor is high in the sky, lashing everything under his ever-watchful eye with heat strokes.

Each while a small dust devil starts and ends as fast, the youth back in my tribe called them Devil Farts!

You contemplate your entire life traveling such distance, no real landmarks in your way.

Orphaned I was, at a very young age. I had no backing in life, which you would think shouldn’t have been too much of a problem for someone with my physique.

But it was especially because of my physique! They called me the giant; called me a mountain; they called me many names that were intended to be derogatory.

There are no bad words. We humans can make the most magnificent word feel like an insult when said in a certain way.

I was young then. Wise men in the tribe always spoke of our mountain as the protector of our tribe.

One of its reasons for existence, it blocked the wind from lashing us all day.

It helped way-mark our tribe for passing convoys to not miss us.

Mountains are such magnificent edifices of nature, and still the youth in our tribe made it a derogatory word to hurt and annoy me all the time.

I never hit them, even though they hurt me physically many, many times. I never felt like I wanted to physically hurt anybody.

I worked some odds and ends around the village, minor tasks here and there that guaranteed me food and survival.

Most of the youth were sons of people I owed my work to. There was no escaping it, but the older I got, the more audacious their insults or physical transgressions became.

I was getting sick and tired of living in my tribe, never able to make anything of my life, never amounting to anything.

It was the night of the wedding of one of the tribe’s youth who was about my age.

He never missed an opportunity to bully me, and he wouldn’t miss it on his wedding night.

I was helping make up the gathering place for the wedding, carrying heavy stuff, bringing drinks and food. Everyone was happy, everyone was drinking and eating, laughing and joking around.

At one point, the groom called me over and said,

“How are you doing, you freak?”

My eyes widened. I didn’t expect better from him, but at least on his wedding night he should have tried to not antagonize me.

“See all those people gathering for my wedding? See the genuine happiness on their faces for me? You will be forever alone, you dumb human mountain.”

If I answer with words as harsh, most of the tribe won’t be giving me any new jobs.

And while I can answer with violence for this demeaning treatment, I don’t feel like doing that.

My heart is so heavy though, from all the abuse I had to endure, sometimes it feels like they do this to me just because I never push back.

Because they know each time I push back, it gets me into more trouble.

Sadistic assholes who revel in my misery.

I gave him a strict, challenging stare instead of answering.

“Oh, showing some spunk finally. Our fake gentle giant is showing his true side, is that it? Lucky for you, this is my wedding night. I will deal with you later.”

I turn my back to him and start walking away.

“Hey you big sack of rocks, take this.”

He threw a gold coin at my feet. I looked at it, and back at him, and walked away.

“The Hell! You dare refuse my kindness, you piece of shit!”

The groom is running after me. I am still walking away. He gets ahead of me, and jumps and slaps me in the face so hard.

I barely felt anything, but he hurt my pride or what’s left of it anyway, so I shoved him out of my way and continued walking.

“You better keep walking, walk away and never come back! Father, the charity case you all burden our lives with ruined my mood on my wedding night. Do fucking something about it!”

“GABALAWI THE NEXT TIME YOU COME TO US, YOU BETTER BE WALKING ON YOUR HANDS AND KNEES, AND I WILL THINK OF FORGIVING YOU, HOW DARE YOU RUIN SUCH AN AUSPICIOUS NIGHT, Keep walk…..”

I couldn’t hear his obnoxious shouting anymore.

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I was picking up speed as I moved further.

The entire tribe heard him. I am wondering why I kept staying there for this long. I should have left with a convoy long ago, but the only thing stopping me was perhaps if anywhere else differed from my tribe?

Would other people treat me with kindness?

That remained to be seen, but with a mountain of a lifetime of unjustness on top of my shoulders, I left, never looking back. There must be a life for me out there.

*****

image [https://imgur.com/XfBSXXC.jpg]

After a day heading away from my tribe, when I doubted everything, thirsty, hungry, tired, and exhausted, thinking my end will surely be in this desert.

I finally met a caravan. I gave them the only coins I had in exchange for food and water.

I asked them for directions, out of the desert, to one of those, talked about cities that I heard a lot about, but never seen, and they described the way for me.

They were kind to me, respectful while speaking with me. I never knew what those feelings felt like, not sure if I am exaggerating when I say that for the first time I felt human…

*****

image [https://imgur.com/XfBSXXC.jpg]

The days and nights faded together, I wasn’t sure how much time had passed, the way out of the desert would take months on foot, and luckily enough for me, I found a few tribes in the way, where I offered them my services for food and water for the way, which they gladly accepted, and generously rewarded my efforts.

I don’t understand anymore. All that was normal in my past life turned out to be abnormal. I thought I was a freak, that my physique warranted the abuse I got.

Did my tribe just get caught up in all this ugliness and never stopped to ponder why they started doing it in the first place, or what’s the effect all the abuse and bullying were taking on me, a fellow human, who isn’t much different from them?

I kept thinking of the past some days, and other days I tried to throw it behind me, and act like it never happened.

My confidence was on the rise, my self-esteem was through the sky compared to what it had been most of my life.

A life that was doomed to loneliness and misery if I stuck around in that place, which never accepted me.

I felt much better. The lashes of the eternal tormentor were nothing to me, I handled the heat just fine, the length of the way out of our desert was nothing to me, I had a goal, and I was going to achieve it.

******

image [https://imgur.com/XfBSXXC.jpg]

After three months on the way I finally saw a change of scenery, over there on the horizon there wasn’t sand anymore, there was trees and greenery and a shade of blue cutting through the land, I wondered what it was, it all looked like a mirage of the desert, but a passing caravan told me the desert was nearly at an end, so I knew it must have been what the world looked like out of the desert in what we called the wetlands!

A few miles and I was there, walking on solid land instead of sand.

The long blue shade I saw from far away was a river!

I ran towards it and kneeled down, and gulped down water like it was going to run out!

After getting full to the point of sloshing and filling my water skin bags, I looked around. No one was around as far as the eye can see.

I found a spot in the river that wasn’t deep. I could stand on it and only be knee deep in the water. I took off all my clothes and started washing.

It felt like I was washing away years of being ashamed of my body.

Humiliation and abuse melting and exuding from my pores through the river.

This benevolent body of water that will forever keep giving to this land, a land that was alive just because of it, and it asked for nothing in return.

Years of oppressive thoughts, trickling out of my mind each time I submerged my head into the water.

I didn’t think I would love having this abundance of water so much.

Halfway through washing myself, I felt happy. For the first time, I felt happy. I was laughing, throwing water in the air with my hands, then I started crying. They were happy tears; I felt like I finally made it, like I was stuck in a nightmare and made it out. For the first time, I looked forward to what life will bring me next. I was ready, ready to live to the fullest.

*****

image [https://imgur.com/XfBSXXC.jpg]

After walking for days, I found a small village; which I entered and asked around for work; I didn’t have to ask for long. Everyone was welcoming me. They saw me as an opportunity to do hard work and carry things they can’t. They were all so kind to me.

After working for many people in the village for half a year, the village elder asked me over to his place, where I found him sitting with many artisans of the village that I helped many times in the past months.

They welcomed me, and the elder spoke.

“Gabalawi, we welcome you among us. Since you arrived to this village, you have been helpful. You accepted whatever we gave you, and you were never greedy. We loved you as one of our own, and we want you to know that we consider you one of our own.”

“Thanks Elder. Your words warm my heart. I am happy among all of you. You welcomed me with open arms, and I am really grateful for the opportunity to be among such kind people who treated me with nothing but respect.”

Everyone around was smiling warmly at me, wide expectant smiles like they were hiding something good from me.

“You are a good man Gabalawi, a gentleman, and because of all your help, Me and the other villagers, would like to offer you a small house in the village, that will be your own from now on, We are greedy and we want you to be one of us forever and stay in this village, who knows we might even marry you to one of our daughters.”

I couldn’t believe my ears, a house of my own, One of their own!

Marry one of their daughters!!!

I never even dared have such a dream, and yet it’s now my reality.

I couldn’t stop the tears flowing down my face.

I didn’t know what I was saying, choking out words of gratitude between the happy tears, while many people were patting me on the back and hugging me.

None of them know my story, but they accepted me among them, and never suspected me of anything.

We all headed over to my new house, and I found that they even had furnished it with what they could buy or spare.

And I couldn’t say anything. I had stopped crying on the way here, but now I am crying again.

I finally choked out, “Thanks everyone, thanks. You don’t know how much this means to me, how deep your kindness has touched my heart. Thank you.”

Everyone just patted me on the back, or hugged me, or shook my hand.

And they excused themselves to allow me to enjoy my new home.

Half an hour later, the wife of the elder came to my house with a big tray of food, which she gave to me at my door, the tray contained the best meal that I ever ate in this world, I never could afford such food, none of the villagers could, but they must have wanted to make this day as special as they could for me.