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Up Your Arsenal

“So, zhis is a dungeon core,” Wilhelm muttered, staring closely into the fiery core of my…core. Where before, my core was simply shining, it was now burning with a golden, aethereal flame. “I’ve heard zhe stories, but I’ve never seen one before.”

I was gritting my teeth, or as close as I could get without actually having teeth, at the sight of the revenant bending over to inspect my core. I was just a mess of contradicting instincts; on the one hand, I somehow trusted him almost completely, yet at the same time, something in the back of my ghostly head was screaming all the horrible things he could potentially do to my exposed core. Apparently, I have anxieties, isn’t that something?

I hovered over to float by Wilhelm’s shoulder. What kind of stories?

“Tales of king making and of king breaking. Tales of wonder and tales of horror. Tales of heroes and villains.” Wilhelm looked at me, his burning eyes gazing at me through the corner of his visor. “Zhe kind legends are made of.”

Well, that’s all sorts of helpful.

Wilhelm stood straight, tucking his hands behind his back. “You are not vhat I expected,” he said finally, head turning to the side, one hand coming to rest on the cannon I’d shoved aside (somehow) to let the revenant knight into the cabin. “It is said zhat to enter a dungeon is to court death, and yet, you only have two traps, three crabs, and a skeleton pirate who cannot even best an octopus.”

I also have a giant seagull.

The revenant knight stared at me. “Ah, yes, a feathered rat. Zhat will definitely strike fear into your enemies.”

I stared at Wilhelm, unamused. Hey, I can do without the sarcasm. I’m doing my best.

Wilhelm paused, taking a deep breath. “Apologies,” he said, sincerely apologetic. “Vhen I died, it was vith the knowledge zhat I had failed in my duty. But, now that death is no longer so terminal…” He took another deep breath and let it out. “Bah, but enough vith such maudlin thoughts. Vhat are your plans?”

I tried pursing my lips. To be honest, I haven’t the foggiest. I’ve mostly been reacting to things as they come.

The revenant grumbled, staring at me in contemplation. “I see. Vell, far be it from me to tell you vhat to do. But,” he clarified. “If I may suggest, perhaps you should look into increasing your defenses. I feel exposed, and it only makes it vorse zhat I do not have a good blade by my side.” Clicking his heels together, Wilhelm brought his fist to his chest in a salute. “By your leave.” Turning smartly on his heels, the revenant marched to the door, deftly opening it outward with hardly a break in his stride. “To zhink I’d miss my days as a squire in zhe armory…”

If I had arms, I’d be crossing them in thought right about now. Wilhelm was right, I did need more defenses. Those lizardmen that attacked me were far too…not industrialized, but well-organized, to have been on their own. Their weapons were not the crude things of isolated survivors, instead boasting a sophistication that spoke of a primitive support structure, at the very least.

Actually, what happened to those weapons? I don’t remember absorbing them.

Regardless, I still need defenses. Cleaning up that mess on the main deck took long enough that I regenerated enough mana to buy a couple of traps.

Although…I can’t get that last thing Wilhelm was muttering about out of my head. An armory. That might be useful. At the moment, I have to manually reload my cannons…well, cannon…which costs me five mana each time. I wonder if…would building an armory mitigate that cost?

[Dungeon Core Fort Kickass Health 30/30 Mana 33/50]

[Construction]

[Terrain]

[Raise Terrain]

[Lower Terrain]

[Add Water]

[Remove Water]

[Wooden Construction]

[Construct Wooden Wall: 1 Mana]

[Construct Wooden Door: 1 Mana]

[Construct Canvas Awning: 5 Mana]

[Construct Guard Tower: 20 Mana]

[Construct Small Armory: 20 Mana]

[Construct Small Storeroom: 15 Mana]

[Objects]

[Oil Lantern: 1 Mana]

[Hurricane Lamp: 1 Mana]

[Table: 1 Mana]

[Bookcase: 1 Mana]

[Bed: 2 Mana]

[Hammock: 1 Mana]

[Stool: 1 Mana]

Holy cow, this thing really kicked off since I bought the entrance. Terrain, wooden construction, and objects. Lots of things I can purchase. Some of these things, I have no idea why I couldn’t make or purchase them earlier. Other things do make sense, because there’s not much point in being able to effect terrain when there’s no terrain to effect. Still, the rest makes no sense.

…I think I’m missing something.

Meh. I’ll figure it out later.

Okay, let’s do the armory. It might be foolish to make one before I beef up my defenses, but I think it will work out in the long run.

But where to put it. Think, think, think…

The gundeck seems an obvious place. It’s open, gun ports have been cut all along the hull, so I’ll definitely be putting more cannons in here at some point, and it’s in a centralized location.

The berth deck is another place, but there’s a lot of walls there, and really, it’s easier to go down than it is to go up.

So, gundeck it is.

Letting myself sink into the deck, I popped out from the ceiling in the gundeck. I’m right underneath the main cabin. Hmm, the hull is solid, I think I’ll tuck the armory in back here. And…buy.

The ship shook, wood warping and groaning macabrely. Wooden planks grew out of the floor and the roof, flowing together until they formed a wall. Part of that wall rippled, twisting and distorting to form a set of doors similar to the ones leading into the cabin above deck. Finally, a pair of oil lamps sprouted from the wall on either side of the doors, twin flames flickering into existence as the shaking slowed. The ship stood still.

Well, that was a production. Is that shaking going to happen every time I build something? God, I hope not, I have a feeling that’d get annoying fast.

So, I have an armory. Only, it’s…empty. Hmm…does the armory have its own menu?

[Dungeon Core Fort Kickass Health 30/30 Mana 13/50]

[Armory]

[Furnishings]

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[Empty Barrel: 1 Mana]

[Workbench: 1 Mana]

[Small Table: 1 Mana]

[Weapons Cabinet: 1 Mana]

[Weaponry]

[Pirate Cutlass: 20 Mana]

[Bayonet: 15 Mana]

[Steel Hunting Knife: 15 Mana]

[Steel Hatchet: 15 Mana]

[Ebony Macahuitl: 10 Mana]

[Obsidian Spear: 10 Mana]

[Ebony Club: 10 Mana]

[Flintlock Pistol: 20 Mana]

[Flintlock Musket: 25 Mana]

[Ammunition]

[Box of Primer: 15 Mana]

[Barrel of Gunpowder: 15 Mana]

[Pile of Cannonballs: 15 Mana]

[Pile of Grapeshot: 15 Mana]

[Ramrod: 5 Mana]

[Sponge: 5 Mana]

[Priming Iron: 5 Mana]

[Botefeux: 5 Mana]

[Sack of Musket Balls: 10 Mana]

[Powder Horn: 10 Mana]

Wow, that is quite the selection. Three categories; furnishings, weapons, ammo…huh, I have the lizardmen’s weapons listed under weapons. I must have absorbed them with their bodies. Weird that the popups never said anything about it. Ugh, but the weapons are expensive. It makes sense, they’d probably make my minions (those that could use them, at least) stronger, let them hit harder.

Pity I don’t have enough mana to actually do what I wanted, setting things up for the cannons to be reloaded manually. Well, I can always furnish the place while waiting for Dexter or Sinister to get back.

Let’s see…let’s get…two workbenches, set those in the corners. What if I put an empty barrel here, against the back hull between the two…oh, I like that look. Plus, I can keep things in there. Maybe spears. Ooh, a table, I need a table, pop one out and…small, round, half the size of the workbenches, let’s stick it at the end of the portside workbench. Yes, I think that’s a good spot for it. Umm…cabinets, let’s get…three, I’ll arrange them around the mizzenmast here. Good, good.

Okay, that was seven mana spent, leaving me with six. You know, I like the way this armory is turning out. I just need to get enough mana for the cannon stuff and I’ll be just fine and dandy.

I was distracted by footsteps outside the door. The doorknob rattled, and the narrow twin doors opened to admit Wilhelm’s armored form. The revenant looked around, taking in the unfinished armory before his fiery gaze locked onto my aethereal form. For a moment, he was silent, but then he took a steadying breath. “It’s one zhing to hear zhe stories of how dungeons make zhe earth quake, it’s anozher to experience it for oneself.”

Yeah, sorry about that, I apologized. I had no idea that was going to happen.

“Quite alright,” Wilhelm assured. “Just, give us some warning next time? Deadbeard lost his head again, quite literally.”

Whoops. I’ll be sure to do so.

Wilhelm nodded, then looked closely at the furnishings. “Is zhis an armory?”

Yeah, I replied, somewhat surprised. How’d you know?

The revenant gestured at the room. “I spent most my time as a squire in zhe armory. I should hope I can recognize one, even if it is only at zhe most rudimentary level.”

Oh yeah, he’d muttered something about that earlier. Any suggestions then?

Looking about, Wilhelm shook his head. “Nein. You’ll need tools, supplies to maintain your veapons, but, you don’t really have zhe space for anything else.”

Ah, well, we’re out of luck for tools at the moment. I sighed. Well, thank you.

“Mein pleasure,” Wilhelm nodded politely. “Vhen you get zhe armory stocked, let me know? As I said earlier, I feel naked vithout a good blade at my side.”

This coming from the man in full plate mail armor. Sure, I’ll be sure to let you know.

Wilhelm sketched a quick bow. “Danke.” He paused, his head tilting to one side as a distant thumping echoed through the ship. “Ah, sounds like one of your crabs has returned.”

So it would seem, I agreed. I’ll see you later, then.

Floating down through the floor, I made my way down to the orlop deck and proceeded out of the deck. Even though the sun had come up and was beating down on the sands, I didn’t have to wait for my vision to adjust. One of the few pleasant things I’d found about being incorporeal.

I was halfway across the sand when the gates opened, letting in Sinister carrying a…

Jesus Christ, Sinister! I stopped dead in my tracks, staring gormlessly at the giant crab and its cargo. Where the hell did you get a great white shark?

Sinister didn’t answer of course. He just proudly presented the dead shark to me, holding it out in front of him in his claws. For my part, all I could do was stare at the behemoth fish.

The thing was huge. It was the epitome of needing a bigger boat; it barely fit through the gates in the first place. It was at least thirty feet long if it was an inch, and its mouth was easily large enough to swallow a man whole.

Jesus Christ, how the hell did Sinister manage to kill this thing? Seriously, I didn’t even think they grew to that size, yet here one is, all mangled and cut to hell by Sinister. My giant crab isn’t even scratched…actually, no, now that I look closely, there is a set of scratches in his upper shell that looks disturbingly like bite marks.

Sighing, I reached out and poked the dead fish.

[Baby Megalodon absorbed. +100 Mana]

Eep.

Oh my. Oh my my my. Aiyaiyaiyaiyai…

Well, it’s a good thing I don’t wear pants anymore, because I’m sure that I would have soiled them.

Fffffffffff…

Okay, keep it together old boy. Keep it together. It’s just an extinct, not-so-extinct sea monster your crab brought you, no need to freak out.

Th-ank you Sinister. Huh, my voice cracked. How does that work?

Wriggling in joy, Sinister clacked his claws together and scuttled away, the gates swinging shut behind him.

Slowly, I turned, only to stop as I caught a glimpse of the very angry octopus floating in the bit of lagoon within the walls. Never have I seen a mollusk so shell shocked. When it noticed me looking at it, it didn’t even hiss. It just slowly sank under the water’s surface, a haunted look in its eyes.

I feel you, my angry cephalopod friend. I feel you. Oy. Just what kind of monster have I created?

Well, that was a lot of mana to get from a baby. Oh God, the adults must be terrifying.

In a bit of a daze, I wandered back into the shipwreck. Let’s…let’s just go finish up with the armory, before I freak out and go catatonic.

----------------------------------------

And two barrels of gunpowder, one box of primer, a pile of cannonballs, and the various implements needed to load a cannon, and my armory is nearly complete, leaving me with twenty-six mana to work with. You know, it’s really therapeutic to decorate. I’ve almost forgot what I was freaking out about.

…and now I’ve gone and thought about it. Aaaaaaaah. Existential terror!

Okay, the moment’s passed. Hopefully that won’t happen again.

Oh, who am I kidding, of course it will. Probably at the most inopportune time as well.

Any-hoodles, I still need to actually stock the armory…it’s kind of just a room with cabinets and barrels…and explosive gunpowder. For my cannons. Actually, wouldn’t that make it a ship’s magazine?

Either way, I still need to throw some weapons in there. But, I think that can wait until later, when I have the mana to spare. For now, I think I should focus on traps. First things first, I need to move my spike pit, put it in a better spot. It’s not really going to do anything where it is right now.

Hmm, where to put it? The beach maybe. If it can be moved…I hope it can be moved. I should check on that.

Floating upwards, I passed up into the cabin, and then floated out onto the deck. Ooh, I never reset the hole. That…that could have ended badly for someone. Okay…right…let’s just poke the hole, and…

[Spike Pit Trap]

[Reset: 5 Mana]

[Reposition: 5 Mana]

Oh good, I can reposition it. It’ll just cost me five mana.

I wonder if repositioning it will reset it? Well, either way, I can afford five mana. Pick reposition, and…

I am holding a hole. I am holding a hole in my aethereal hands. It is flat and floppy, and pitch black. It’s like something out of a cartoon, only if you look at it head on, you can see a bunch of spikes in the depths that don’t actually exist. God this is trippy.

I don’t want to look at this anymore. Down to the beach we go. I paused right before I started to pass through the deck. Actually, let’s take the stairs. I don’t want to pass through the floor and find out I accidentally set the trap in the wrong spot.

Doot-de-doo, going down the stairs, doot-de-doo, this is taking longer than just going through the floor, doot-de-doo, and we’re here.

Okay, where to put this hole, this hole that bends physics over the table and violates it. Dry. Without foreplay. Doesn’t even leave a phone number and my mind has gone to some very dark places, so let’s stick a knife in that train of thought and leave it for dead.

Where to put the hole? Um…here, smack between the wreck and the gate, next to the lagoon and this puddle. Boop and place.

…oh shit, I hope it doesn’t fill with water.

Good news, it is not. That’s a relief.

A harsh, but muffled screech pierced the air, and I looked up just in time to catch a winged figure silhouetted against the sun. A moment later, Moa landed on the sand before me, a black arrow with green fletching and an obsidian head clenched in the dire gull’s toothed beak.

Flipping the arrow into the air, Moa neatly caught it in his beak by the fletching. With deft movements of his neck, the dire gull began to draw in the sand,

What are those, stick figures with tails? Okay, tailed stick figures and…what is that? A triangle with one curved side and a line sticking out from it…which is now in a box. Oh look, the stick figures have spears and…

Oh shit.