“Coffee?”
Odessa glanced up from where she’d been dozing in the hospital waiting room.
Chaser was holding out a cup of coffee that smelt like it had actually been made using a real espresso machine. He had another three cups in a takeaway holder.
“Oh, fuck yes!” Right then, she would have sold her soul for some caffeine. “Where did you even get this?”
Chaser took the seat next to her. “Some guy in the parking lot wearing a trench coat.”
“What! Really?” Odessa gave him a wide-eyed look. She stared down at her coffee and took one long, heavenly sniff. Then she proclaimed, “I don’t even care.”
She poked Donny, who was next to her, asleep across three chairs. “Oi! Donny. Coffee.”
“Huh.” He raised his weary head. “Oh, thank the gods!” He took the cup from Chaser’s outstretched hand. One side of his usually neatly coiffed hair looked a little flatter than usual. That, more than anything else, was a testament to the long night they’d just had. Getting Bob, first back to the buggy, and then to a hospital, had taken several hours. The sun would probably be rising soon.
“Any news?” Chaser asked Odessa.
She nodded. “They’re prepping him for surgery.”
“Already? Really?”
“Well, it took so long to get him back that he hasn’t eaten anything and it is the middle of the night at the edge of nowhere so it’s not like there are a lot of other cases.”
“I hope the poor surgeon is more awake than we are,” remarked Chaser.
“They said it should be pretty straightforward.”
Donny took a long sip of coffee, blinked several times, and then sat up attentively. “Hey, you guys ever hear about that case out on the east coast? Some doc was operating at 3am after a double shift and left his scalpel in a girl’s leg. Sewed it back up and everything.”
“Bullshit!” Odessa told him. “But you should tell Bob that story once he’s out. Ooooh we should totally get a metal detector and rig it to beep at a button press then scan his leg. It’ll be so funny.”
Donny gave one loud ‘hah.’
Chaser nodded along looking thoughtful, and tired. After a moment’s silence he asked, “Where’s Rhys?”
Odessa shrugged. “Dunno, went to the bathroom maybe. I was asleep.”
They chatted for a bit. There wasn’t much else to do at this hour except chat.
“This kind of throws a kink in the whole Mt Sutmo plan, doesn’t it?” Remarked Chaser sadly. “There’s no way Bob’s gonna be able to climb that mountain, and it’s not like we can really leave him in the car.”
“Why not?” suggested Donny. “He can do his meditating and read.”
“Be a bit shit for that many hours though,” Odessa pointed out.
Chaser nodded. “So what do we do then? Head back home?”
“No way!” Odessa shook her head and tried to rack her brain for another solution. “Maybe he could do it, or at least some of it. You guys remember that time I hiked all the way into Moon Bay on crutches?”
“Yeah, I remember the blisters on your hands were the size of golf balls and we had to get that nice couple to take you back out on their boat,”
“But I got there, even carried my climbing shoe and the quick-draws.”
“And nobody did any climbing what-so-ever the next day,” Donny reminded her.
“That’s only cause we all drank so much,” Odessa objected.
Chaser groaned. “That was the worst hangover of my life, I swear.” He looked down at his empty coffee cup and then at the one remaining one.
“If Rhys ain’t back in 5, I’m drinking his coffee.”
“Fair,” Odessa agreed.
“Hey, speak of the Devil,” Chaser remarked as Rhys walked back in to the room.
“Ooh, is that coffee? For me?”
Chaser sighed and handed him the last cup. “Yeah, I guess so.”
“Thanks. Hey not to brag or anything, but you guys are gonna love me.”
“Why? What have you done?” asked Odessa.
“I have figured our next big move.” He waited a moment to give it time to sink in. Unimpressed with their reactions he remarked, “Oh, come on, show a little excitement.”
“It’s 4 in the morning,” replied Odessa, although a quick glance at her watch showed it was closer to 5.
“Mmm,” agreed Chaser with a tired nod.
Donny completed the effect with a yawn.
“Okay, okay, fair enough. Anyway I was just chatting to a couple of climbers who happened to be in the other waiting room, over by the vending machines. One of their mates collided with the wrong end of a truck on his motorcycle—he’s fine, it just missed him, mostly—Anyway, One of them recognised me from my videos. He was like, ‘hey aren’t you that tech guy who reviews all them fancy gadgets for climbing and canyoning and stuff?’ And he was pretty stoked because my video saved him some money on a dodgy dive watch. You won’t believe the shit some companies are getting away with, reported accuracies that are only valid for the first 3 months of use then you gotta get them re-serviced at an extra cost. There’s this one company whose watches use blood-powered infusements for providing really perasonalised data so-”
“Rhyyyys,” Odessa complained.
“Okay, so these two climbers—or three, but two now—well, turns out they’re also cave divers and they were headed towards Riftgate to dive some unexplored cave system in the middle of the bush. This rich guy who owns the land invited them up there to map it for him. He’s even paying for any equipment they need. Like any equipment. But get this, since their friend got injured they’re down a man, so I told them, ‘hey, we got a couple of experienced cave divers here, plus the best cameraman this side of the planet, why don’t we team up?’ And they seemed pretty keen with that. I mean they know who I am, and the girl recognised your name too.” Rhys nodded at Odessa.
“The girl?”
“Yeah, so what do you guys think? I mean the guy loaned them a fricking Rolex.”
“And that had nothing to do with your decision I’m sure,” teased Chaser.
“Well, of course it did. It’s a fricking Rolex, one of the best diving watches ever. But get this, for every new section of the cave system we map there’s an extra bonus in it for each of us. A nice big pay packet, enough to send us anywhere we want.”
“What’s the catch?” asked Odessa.
Rhys shrugged. “Well, it’s not much of a catch. The guy just wants us to take someone along, for the easy bits, you know, give them a fun time and let them explore just enough to make them feel like they’re a real adventurer. Maybe even let them enter a new section of the cave first, under guidance of course.”
The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement.
Odessa considered it. “A passenger huh? Well, we’ve done that before. Sounds fine to me.”
Donny gave the thumbs up.
Chaser nodded. “I’m in.”
Several hours, and some well-needed rest later, they found themselves driving up an old, overgrown, jungle road, towards something called ‘The Goblin’s Grotto’. Chaser was in control. Donny sat shotgun so he could get footage of their approach. They hadn’t forgotten Bob. He’d been released from hospital following a smooth surgery with instructions to rest for the next few days. Now he was nestled in the back between Odessa and Rhys with his freshly cast leg poking through between the front seats, occasionally getting in the way of Chaser’s gear-shifting.
“Oi! Watch it!” Bob told Chaser for the thousandth time, as Chaser briefly shifted down so he could get the buggy up and over a particularly gnarly section of rocks.
“I can’t believe this is here,” Odessa remarked, as she gazed around at the thick bush. We were just in the middle of the desert and then bam, jungle.”
“Yeah, it’s sort of an oasis,” Bob told her. “Lotta fresh underground rivers close to the surface. But the whole area around Riftgate is kind of a biome anomaly. If you go north about 100 km you’ll get snow. Like desert, then line in the sand, then snow.”
“Or line in the snow,” replied Odessa with a grin.
“Well it’s still a line in the sand too, cause it’s like sand, and then it’s snow, boom just like that. Ow! Chaser!”
“Sorry,” Chaser called back from the front. “This road’s a munt.”
The buggy tilted sideways and then growled its way out of a muddy hole.
“So how deep do you think this system goes?”
With a flick of his hand Donny sent his camera up in the air so it was following along telekinetically above them, and then pulled out his laptop. “So, I’ve been looking up the history of this cave system on the internet.”
Chaser gave him a quick double take from the driver’s seat. “How do you even have internet?”
“Well, I don’t now, but I downloaded some stuff via the satellite when we were back in the desert, while you guys were sleeping earlier.”
“Why weren’t you sleeping?” Chaser narrowed his eyes.
“I slept when we were waiting in the hospital.”
Odessa climbed out of her seat so she could better look over Donny’s shoulder at the screen. “Let’s see.”
“Put your seat belt back on,” Rhys complained.
Odessa wrinkled her nose and poked her tongue out at him.
“Well there’s not much to see, that’s the thing,” Donny told them.
Disappointed, Odessa sat back down and put her seat belt on.
“So, it seems like there’s been a few attempts at these caves but not really much to show for it. Most of the footage I could find was fuzzy. There was this one recording that had only sound and no video, and it’s silent for the majority of it until right near the end when all you can hear is some splashes and someone screaming.”
“So what happened to the people who filmed it?”
“I don’t know. Nobody does. Apparently it’s found footage. But nobody knows who found it either.”
“Or somebody’s reenactment of The Blair Witch Project,” replied Odessa with a grin.
“What about the other attempts?” Rhys asked.
“Well, there were a couple of girls who went missing out here in 92,’ and this one guy in 96’ who came out here with two mates and he was the only one who came back out but he won’t talk about what happened. Even Mickey Erikson, the guy that was first to scale the Balloon Crest and who dove the wreck of the Dawn Explorer, tried to map these caves. It was his last trip before Primrose Peak.”
“So what happened?”
“Don’t know. He died on Primrose Peak, so who knows what he saw in the Goblin’s Grotto before that. He didn’t put much up between the trips. There are a lot like that actually. This place has been the second to last trip for several dead adventurers. There was one couple that came out here on their honeymoon back in 2000, right before they vanished in the desert. Then some kid a year later who spent a few days here. He sent an email to his parents saying he was going climbing up north along the coast and was never heard from again. Maybe it’s bad luck.”
“Maybe he saw the goblins and they drove him mad,” suggested Bob.
“Goblins aren’t real.” Odessa rolled her eyes, then she reconsidered. “Are they?” She’d been raised in one of the more insular human villages and she could never be quite sure what was fantasy and what was fact. Growing up she’d always thought unicorns were imaginary, until she’d seen one. Turns out they weren’t even as dangerous as what the stories had said. They were basically spoilt show ponies. Very expensive show ponies, that couldn’t pull very much and generally weren’t supposed to be ridden. Yes they were all capable of a single different type of magic, much like witches themselves. But it wasn’t like they ran around setting towns on fire and stabbing people with their horns, like her parent’s bedtime stories had always said. It didn’t help that Chaser and Donny kept trying to make up fake animals and convince her they were real.
“Oh, very real,” replied Bob with a serious expression.
Odessa didn’t believe him. Bob was never that serious.
“They have long green ears and they’re attracted to electricity. They sneak into people’s houses when they’re sleeping and gnaw on the electrical wires and technopath toes.”
“Those are gremlins,” corrected Chaser from the front seat.
Odessa frowned. “It thought gremlins were little, brown, leathery creatures? And they definitely don’t chew on toes.”
“Oh so she knows about gremlins does she?” teased Chaser.
“I used to flat with an electrical engineer. She told me all about them.”
“Well,” Chaser continued, “Goblins are bigger see, much bigger. In fact, some say if you let them keep growing, eventually they get as big as a house.”
“Like that?” Rhys asked as he pointed straight ahead.
Odessa had just enough time to see a giant green looking creature with long ears, earrings, and a pink mow-hawk?... standing on the road ahead of them. Then Chaser swerved and drove them all into a deep rut.
Luckily he had only been going about 10 km/hour.
It was still a bit of jolt though.
When Odessa looked up at the road ahead again the creature was gone.
“Ow!” remarked Bob.
“Shit! I lost the camera!” cried Donny.
“Rhys, you fuck!” yelled Chaser.
“You weren’t supposed to swerve,” replied Rhys indignantly.
“What do ya mean I wasn’t supposed to swerve? There was a giant thing in the road. What did you expect was going to happen?”
“Well, it obviously wasn’t real,” explained Rhys.
Sometimes Odessa forgot that Rhys’ power was summoning illusions. Sometimes she forgot he could be just as immature as the rest of them.
Donny was already climbing out of the car. “I gotta go get the camera, don’t move.”
“Somehow I don’t think that’s going to be a problem,” Chaser replied, as he tried to do just that and found the wheels spinning in place.
While Donny ran off down the road to find his camera the rest of them, except for Bob, who was stuck the car with his cast, all piled out. Odessa tapped a button on her watch and then helped them shove branches under the stuck wheels, anything that would give them a little more traction.
Chaser jumped back in, gave the accelerator a forceful push, and managed to spray mud all over Odessa and Rhys.
They ducked and ran for cover as some of the twigs and a rock or two came flying their way.
“You idiot,” Rhys told him. “You’re supposed to push it down slowly.”
“Well if you know so much, why don’t you do it then?” Chaser threw his hands in the air and jumped back out.
Rhys gladly took the wheel.
After a bit of digging and more branches, they tried again.
“Maybe we should deflate the tyres?” suggested Odessa when the car still didn’t move enough to get out of the ditch.
But before anyone could reply a deep, warm voice called out, “Hey there! Do you need a push?”
Odessa glanced up to see a god-like man with his upper half poking out of the sun-roof of a silver 4x4. His darkly bronzed muscular arms stretched the seams of his black shirt but required very little stretching of the imagination. He looked more like he belonged at a bodybuilding gym than on a climbing wall. Most climbers were wiry, strong and lean, not muscular. Muscle disproportionately added body mass. It meant you had to carry more. It probably helped for diving though. Made sinking easier.
There were exceptions of course, like Donny, who had been known to buy five mince pies the morning of an expedition and eat them all before the end of their first snack break. Donny was more of a cameraman than a climber though. He’d often aid climb stuff that the others would free solo. He was a little chubby and sometimes slow moving but he was strong and had the endurance of an Ox. He’d keep going long after the others wanted to rest.
Rhys was probably at the upper end of muscular for a climber but he was nothing compared to this new god. The rest of them were more stereotypically lean.
The god’s hair was shaved, his eyes were a bright green, his perfect smile could have melted butter. For several moments Odessa just stared at him.
Rhys introduced them. “Oh hey! Guys, this is Nico, one of the folk we’ll be diving with. Nico, this is Chaser, Odessa, and Bob’s the one in the car there.”
“Hi. Pleasure to meet you.” Nico waved at them, then he pointed to the driver’s seat. “This is Triss.”
The glare on the windscreen made it hard to see the person at the wheel but a moment later a woman poked her head out the side and gently waved. She was almost the complete opposite of Nico, with extremely fair skin and a structure that was more skinny than lean. Her hair was also short, cut razor straight and longer at the front than at the back. The pair of the them wouldn’t have been out of place on the cover of a magazine.
“Fuck, yes, we’d love a push.” Chaser stepped back away from the buggy.
Odessa observed as the other vehicle slowly drove forward and gently nudged the back of the buggy while Rhys steered it up and out of the hole.
Donny returned then, with his camera looking a little muddy, but otherwise undamaged. In a frustrated tone he exclaimed, “Oh come on, your couldn’t wait until I got the camera rolling? This is some superb footage we’re missing.”
“Don’t worry Donny, I got ya,” Odessa pointed to her watch.
Donny frowned. “What’s that?”
She’d figured he wouldn’t want to miss this. “Hidden camera. Doesn’t run for very long and I get a lot of jerky footage but it’s great in an emergency, like when your cameraman loses his camera in the bush,” she teased.
Donny gave a relieved sigh. “You’re the best.”
Odessa grinned. “I know.”
There were whoops of joy from their new friends as both vehicles made it past the hole.
It was only when they all piled back in the buggy that they realised someone was missing.
Odessa looked at the empty seat and then around at the quiet, dark jungle which surrounded them.
“Where’s Chaser?”