Levi Asper looked from Sheriff Cherry to Herman Tate. Herman was oddly serene, devoid of emotion. He smiled politely, sitting on the settee in the Tate parlor, his hands tucked under his thighs. Beside him, Cherry sat, arms looped over the back of the settee, as if he hadn't a care in the world. Butter wouldn't melt in his mouth.
Unseen, Deputy Jeff Schim pinched the bridge of his nose. He sat in the seemingly empty space beside Cherry. This was not a good idea.
For an entirely unrelated reason, Asper was of the same mind. He hadn't anticipated the sheriff would be hanging around when he arrived. "Are you certain you want Sheriff Cherry here?" he asked .
"Yes," said Herman.
Asper again looked between the men. "Sheriff Cherry."
"Yes," said Herman.
"The man you called 'the biggest mistake ever conceived by Brody's Cross'?" Herman Tate didn't like Sheriff Cherry. No one liked Sheriff Cherry.
"...yes," said Herman with less certainty.
"I got you Herman Tate," said Cherry congenially. "You could stand to be a little nicer."
"That is true," said Herman. He would be agreeable and friendly. That had served him well thus far.
"I had to hear about it through the grapevine," said Asper. "Who the hell leaves word with the saloon and no one else? What was your thought process there?"
"You heard, it seems. I'd say it worked." In truth, Cherry wanted Asper to feel as if his perceived authority meant nothing. The Asper family might have been the oldest and wealthiest in Brody's Cross but that didn't mean Cherry would give him the time of day. "I didn't want to overwhelm Herman with too many well-wishers."
"How kind of you," said Asper with forced amicability. "And how fortunate that I could rush over and find you conspiring on the sofa. Are you his legal counsel, Sheriff Cherry? Why is it he's deferrin' to you?" He made no comment as to the bloodstain that remained brazenly soaked across the floor, choosing instead to bark, "And where the hell are the servants? Shouldn't I have been offered somethin' to drink?"
"Down in Texas. I'd imagine the liquor's in the kitchen." Cherry pointed helpfully.
"Given that one of us is a public servant," scowled Asper. "In the absence of the domestics, I'd say it's his job to take those duties over."
"In that case, we're plum out," said Cherry.
"Jesus Christ," muttered Schim.
Asper dropped any pretense of sociability. "Go get us drinks, Sheriff."
"I do not want one, my ch--" Herman started, correcting himself. "...sheriff." That was close.
"He doesn't want one," reiterated Cherry. "Herman's sworn off the stuff."
"Well, I do," said Asper. "Common courtesy dictates that you offer somethin' to your guests."
"You're not my guest," said Cherry. "And you want to talk to Herman Tate alone and unsupervised. That's what you want."
"Did your invisible friend leave?" whispered Herman loud enough for everyone to hear.
"I don't know why I bothered comin' out here," declared Asper, throwing a hand into the air.
"You wanted to talk to Tate," said Cherry firmly. "And it turns out Tate doesn't want me to go anywhere."
"This is what you want?" Asper scoffed, addressing Herman.
Cherry waved the matter along. He couldn't leave Herman to Asper when the former didn't know what Herman was supposed to know. "Yeah, he's said so. Let's get this over with."
Asper frowned, considered, then asked dryly, "I have some new terms to our agreement, Herman. If you don't go along with them I'll..." He glanced to Cherry. "...go to the sheriff."
Cherry chuckled. "Ballsy of you to bring me in on this, Herman."
The statement made the young man worry. He didn't understand. "Is it?"
"Why the change of heart?" mused Asper. "Previously, you didn't want anyone to know about this."
Shady dealings, it sounded like. Cherry didn't seek to go too far down this rabbit hole. "From what I understand, Herman's been attendin' to his father's final request and doin' some soul searchin'."
"Yes," said Herman, reciting what he'd been instructed. "After Pa died, Lacey and I were goin' to spread his ashes in Illinois. That's what he always wanted. Then Lacey got sick and I had to go alone."
Asper frowned. "Your father was buried, wasn't he?"
"His metaphorical ashes," said Cherry, interjecting. "Symbolic."
"If that was the case, why did your household say you were still in town?" asked Asper.
"To keep men like you from takin' advantage of a sick gal like Miss Lacey."
Asper pounded a fist on the arm of his chair. "Why are you answerin' for him, Cherry?"
Herman cut in, "I asked him to." The lawmen were impressed. Cherry hadn't instructed the monster to do so. "Mr. Sheriff is allowed to speak for me. I'd like him to."
Asper made a face. "'Mr. Sheriff'?"
"I don't see anythin' wrong with it," said Cherry with a shrug. Truthfully, he hated it. He wasn't going to blow everything on account of one dumb name.
Gritting his teeth, Asper eyed Herman with intense scrutiny. The young man tried his best to sit calm and straight. "A lookalike, perhaps?" the rancher finally suggested.
"I told you," said Schim. "You can't pull this off."
Cherry responded indignantly, "You callin' me a liar, Levi?"
"I'd like to call you many things," said Asper. "Incompetent. Amoral. Ungrateful."
"I said my thanks for your excellent care," said Cherry, all teeth. "I've shown gratitude."
"Lazy," added the rancher with emphasis.
"Go ahead, Asper," challenged the sheriff. "Ask Herman Tate somethin' only he'd know."
Asper folded his arms and stared daggers. "All right," he said. "If you're really Herman Tate, tell me who your daddy named you after."
Herman panicked. How was he supposed to know anything about that? He hadn't been given more than the barest coaching, assured by Mr. Sheriff that he'd handle the talking. There was one thing, yes, Mr. Sheriff had told him to say in situations of doubt but was this the time to use it?
"Sheep?" he put forth.
Asper's expression softened, although he remained cross. "Fine. He's Herman Tate."
Cherry smirked. "Of course he is."
"I can't believe that worked," said Schim. "I can't believe that's true."
"Be that as it may," said Asper. "I think I will save our conversation for another time."
Cherry arched an eyebrow. "Then you're satisfied?"
"No," said Asper. "I didn't expect you to be babysittin' him."
Herman smiled vacantly.
"What happened to you?" inquired the rancher, unnerved.
"I don't really care what you expected," said Cherry. "I want to know if you're gonna let this drop. I got you Tate. You concede this?"
Of course that was the sheriff's aim. Asper suspected as much. He was content to wash his hands of the lawman and call them even if it meant Cherry would leave Herman to him. "As far I'm concerned, you actually did what I asked."
Jeff Schim, realizing his partner's intentions himself, spoke up. "Go get the drinks. Give Asper a reason to talk to him here."
Cherry side-eyed Schim and aped a cough. "Why?" He cleared his throat. "That's better." To Asper, he said, "Just a bit dry."
"Because," said Schim, "I want to know what this has been about. We've been hearin' about Herman and Lacey for weeks and everythin' we learn gets stranger and stranger. I want to know what happened and this might be the chance." He pondered, then added, "You went as far as to get the demon to fill in for Herman which, while monumentally stupid, would be wasted if we didn't use him to his full potential. I know that you intend to close the book on this as soon as Asper rides off, but it doesn't have to be limited to that. We could get an actual answer to what's been going on."
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"Well," said Asper, after what seemed to him an awkward stretch of sitting in silence, "I'll see you around, Herman." He stood to go.
"Damn it, Ewald." Schim stood to match Asper. He turned to his partner."I want to know even if you don't. Please."
Cherry ran a tongue over his teeth. He didn't much care what Schim wanted. At the same, he rose and said, "You know what? I could use a drink." He nodded at Asper. "Did you want one? Whiskey?"
Herman stood since everyone else was standing.
"I'm leavin', Sheriff." said Asper. "I don't need a drink now."
"Suit yourself," said Cherry and he disappeared to the kitchen.
As soon as he was out of sight and much to Schim's delight, Asper turned to Herman. "You should know that I don't buy your story for one minute."
Herman smiled politely. "What story is that?"
"That your father wanted his ashes scattered. That sob story crap might work on the Cherry but it won't work on me. You think you can weasel out of the agreement by cryin' to the sheriff, think again."
"Okay," said Herman.
"What does Sheriff Cherry know?" prodded Asper. He never would have suspected Herman Tate, out of everyone, to have loose lips.
"Sheep," said Herman, hoping that was the right response.
"The hell he does," said Asper. "You know exactly what I mean."
"I do know exactly what you mean," said Herman, attempting to placate.
"You know," said Asper. "You've been a real pain in the ass to track down. I think you owe me somethin' for the trouble I went through to bring you back. Somethin' as an apology for everythin' you put me through."
"Apology?" That the rancher was making a threat went over Herman's head. "I'm sorry."
"I don't want your apology," snapped Asper. "I want more money the next time you pay. For time missed and for the hell you put me through." He motioned towards the kitchen. "I went out of my way for him. That alone should add another two hundred dollars. That, and you never try this shit again. You understand?"
"I understand," said Herman.
"He doesn't know anything, right?"
"Right."
"Good." Again, the rancher looked towards the kitchen. "I want one thousand dollars in my hand by Sunday, or so help me, Herman, I'm tellin' everyone precisely what you've been up to."
"One thousand dollars?!" gaped Schim.
"Okay," said Herman. How was he going to get one thousand dollars? Mr. Sheriff would need to help him with that.
The rancher set his hat to his head. "I'll be waiting. You know where to find me."
"Yes, I know where to find you," said nodded Herman.
Asper made an unhappy sound and moved to the doorway. "Somethin's up. When I figure out what--" He didn't finish the thought. A large, grizzled man blocked the way to the doorway. Gasping, he back pedaled as the outlaw moved forward. Asper glared at Herman and declared, "You! This was a trap!"
"Hello, Herman," said the grizzled man. "Long time, no see."
Herman blinked. "Yes. Hello."
The grizzled man narrowed his multicolored eyes. "You're not Herman."
"I am Herman," said Herman.
"He's not?" said Asper. Then, to save his skin, "The sheriff tried to trick me! Us. The sheriff tried to trick us."
"We've met before," said the grizzled man, fixated by the young man. "At the church. You looked different then."
"Oh," said Herman. What was he supposed to say to that? "Maybe."
"Yes," said the grizzled man. "I know your smell."
Herman smiled politely.
"Where is Herman Tate?" asked the grizzled man.
"I was wonderin' the same thing," said Asper, playing up their common interest. A mistake.
"Why's that?" asked the grizzled man, examining the rancher. "Who are you?"
Asper swallowed. "Me? I... I just meant I haven't seen him around."
"I asked your name, mister," growled the grizzled man.
"Sheriff!" shouted Schim, sensing the situation was about to get hairy. "Get in here!"
"I really should be goin'," insisted Asper. The grizzled man grabbed him by the front of his shirt and hoisted him off the ground. To Herman, he posited, "Do you know his name?"
"Ewald!" Where was he? Schim didn't dare leave the scene. "We have a problem!"
"Le...vi," recalled Herman. That sounded like the name Mr. Sheriff had used.
"Levi Asper?" suggested the grizzled man.
"Yes," said Herman. He had heard 'Asper' and 'Levi'.
The grizzled man beamed wickedly. "I thought that might be the case. I've heard about you."
"Let me go and I will give you whatever you want," begged Asper. "Please. I'll do whatever you want!"
"The only thing I want you to do," said the grizzled man, "is die."
As the deputy watched, the grizzled man transformed into a large wolf, pushing a struggling Asper into the floor and tearing him apart. Blood splattered over the walls and door frame. Chunks of flesh and viscera coated the wolfman and his surroundings. Little was left intact. When he was finished, there was no question of Levi Asper's survival. Schim covered his mouth with his hands. Herman stared blankly.
The grizzled man, clothing in tatters, returned to his human form and chuckled. "You know," he said to Herman. "You're all right."
"Thank you," said Herman.
"That's a neat trick you've got," he continued, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "How do you pull it off? Is it somethin' I could learn?"
Schim was mortified. Levi Asper was dead, the demon and the wolfman were conspiring, and to top it off, he'd never seen this man before in his life or afterlife. He was some other bastard with two different colored eyes.
"No," said Herman.
"I figured, but I thought I'd ask." He motioned to Herman. "Is there a reason you decided to stop playin' preacher?"
"Mr. Sheriff asked me to," said Herman.
"'Mr. Sheriff'?" The grizzled man picked at his teeth with his thumbnail. Schim didn't want to think about what he dislodged. "I was told the sheriff died."
"No," said Herman. "That was his invisible friend."
"You don't make a lot of sense," said the grizzled man. "That's fine. Where's the sheriff now?"
"In the kitchen."
Schim rushed past the outlaw as he thanked Herman for his help. Passing through the wall, he cried out, "Ewald, the wolfman is here. He just disemboweled Levi Asper and he's comin' for you!"
Sheriff Cherry was nowhere to be seen. As Schim stood dumbfounded, the grizzled man opened the door and stuck his head in. "There's no one here, friend."
"Oh," said Herman. "He said he was getting a drink."
"He's gone," said the outlaw and stepped out. Schim remained in the kitchen listening as the conversation unfolded. "You should come with me. The boys'd get a real kick out of you."
"If you would like." Herman didn't want someone else to try to kill him. He wanted to feed on brains and not be stabbed in the intestines.
"Nah, it's if you'd like."
The answer was easy. "Okay."
"We're gonna hang around here until we find Herman, but then we might ride out to Colorado. You ever been to Colorado?"
"No."
"Come on, we can talk as we ride..."
The voices faded and still Jeff Schim remained. He remained and tried to make sense of what had happened.