Chapter 9 — Tin Hat Conspiracy

“Hopefully I didn’t hurt you,” Lana said in a whisper to not distract the others around us along the wall watching the bout.

“No, it was good. I’m not Rex’s prize student by any means, and I need practice. I will say, that I’ve never had someone your size handle me so readily. You must train a lot?”

“It’s actually been three years since I did any training,” Lana said. I could sense it was a touchy topic by the slightly pained expression she made as she said it.

“Really? It doesn’t seem like it. You are really good,” I emphasized my words by rubbing my throat.

She laughed, “So, you own a shop down the street?”

“Yeah, it’s just across the road on the far end,” I said, running a hand through my hair which was sweaty from our exertions. I was curious what Lana would think. I knew my work tended to be one of the first roadblocks to any relationship. Owning a store was cool, having a crystal shop that sold the metaphysical, was something else. Not bad per say, but it represented some of the fringe elements of society and a few of the women I’d met in the past hadn’t seemed to appreciate it when their goal was a man with a stable income who wouldn’t scare their extended family.

“I’ve seen that driving by,” Lana said. “Is it the one that looks like a greenhouse with all the plants inside?” I noticed her right cheek lifted higher in her smile, showing her white teeth more on that side. They looked perfect, unlike mine. She’d probably had braces and a more normal childhood.

“Haha, yeah. I have a friend who is obsessed with plants, and they help out a lot, but it does make it special.”

“You should pay them more.”

“They actually do it all for Coke on the cheap—Coca-cola that is.” I amended at her raised eyebrow, “are you from this area?”

“I actually only live a few blocks away. I moved here about four months ago. I finally got my job lined up last week.”

“So, you moved here without a job? What put Boise on the map for you?” I asked, truly interested.

“It’s my grandmother’s house. She passed away four months ago and since my dad is gone, she left everything to me. I was ready for a change, so I’m living at her house trying to figure it all out.”

“I’m sorry about your loss—both of them. That had to be hard losing your dad. It sounds like you were close. Was it a long time ago?” Lana took a breath, as if bracing to dive into a topic she didn’t want to discuss. I saw the signs, but it was too late, I’d already asked.

“Three years,” she said, and I could see the hurt still evident on her face. It was the same time since she’d stopped training. Today was a new start for her on many levels. I could tell our conversation, and probably even being here wasn’t the easiest thing for her, so I tried to lighten the mood.

“Well, I’m glad I had the opportunity to be beat silly by you on your first day back,” I said with a chuckle. “I’m glad I could help you see that you’re not rusty in the slightest.”

“It did feel good,” she said, eyeing me. “I put it off for far too long.”

Our conversation stalled for a moment as we both watched two others being walked through grappling techniques by Rex as they had a much more scripted spar. Rex did a good job of making them both feel safe to practice and not ashamed by not knowing much. This was probably the first time either of them had attempted anything like this. They were in a good place to learn.

“My dad… well, he and I trained a lot. He was into boxing, jujitsu, and taekwondo.” She slipped into a more relaxed tone, remembering her father. I was glad she had decided to say more, and I hoped it helped her with her new beginning. “He did lots of training abroad with other military forces, plus everything they could teach him in the navy seals. He went to conventions and courses, all to hone and improve his skills. He took me to anything we could both attend. When he was home or off duty, we went to classes like this.” She looked down at the padded mat flooring. Her face resolved and she squared her shoulders, “It seems both very wrong and very right being here without him. This is what he would want me to do.”

I nodded, giving her a smile of my own and nudging her friendly with my elbow. “I’m sure he would, and despite my poor performance, you’re in good hands with Rex. I can’t imagine a better teacher and I know his students do very well in competitions around here. What do you do for work?”

“I took a job with the forest service. I’m a park ranger and was doing the same in Arizona, so I planned on continuing here. I’ve always loved this area. It’s beautiful.”

“It really is. I just got home from hiking up near Lowman.”

“Oh yeah, maybe you’ll have to show me a few trails sometime?”

My heart soared and I would’ve stumbled on my words to say ‘yes’. I mean it’s not every day you meet a beautiful woman who wants to spend more time with you… well, at least not me. But Rex interrupted the moment before I could respond.

“Line up!” he commanded, brooking no further argument.

We went through grueling training. Rex adjusted each exercise to the ability of those present. That left Lana and I as the two doing the most advanced of everything. In truth, he would normally have probably taken it easier on me—but not today. He saw an opportunity to push me past what I would normally do, and he took it. I could tell he was barely keeping his twisted mirth inside each time he walked past me and corrected my movement or had me hold a position for way too long to demonstrate the exercise for the others. When no one else was looking he’d give me a friendly-mannered taunt, or let his joy show in his eyes. It seemed Lana had caught on, and she was enjoying the show too.

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By the time the class was over, I was drenched in sweat, my legs, arms, and every muscle in-between felt like cooked noodles.

Rex offered me a water bottle and I eagerly downed the whole thing.

Lana paused beside me, drinking her own, much less aggressively than me.

“What days do you come, Cal?” Lana asked.

“Most of them,” I mustered, whipping an arm across my mouth. At Rex’s clear eyebrow raise, I amended, “My schedule is sort of a mess, so I come whenever I can, but it varies. I hike a lot and if the store is busy, I have to put it first.”

“Well, I think I’m going to do the Monday, Wednesday, and Friday classes at seven in the morning. Maybe I’ll see you here?”

“You certainly will,” I said, knowing this was the time when I should ask for her number. She seemed interested, eyes meeting mine as she waited for… more. But the problem was, I didn’t have a phone and was about the hardest person to reach. If I asked for hers, she’d expect a call or text soon and it would get weird real fast when I never called her. Payphones would sometimes work for a couple of minutes, but chances were she wouldn’t answer. I’d leave a message, and then we’d play phone tag for a while if I was lucky. It’d happened before. My best option was to be honest or lean into being the ‘crazy’ new age guy who purposefully kept away from any electronics and lived like it was from the early nineteen hundreds. Not the typical dream guy of the 21st century.

“I uh, I’d ask for your number, so you’d have someone to call—if you needed anything—being new to town and all. But I don’t carry a phone.”

“Oh really?” she asked, intrigued, eyes focusing on mine as one eyebrow raised in question.

“Yeah, I just—”

“—He doesn’t want the government following him around,” Rex interjected, likely having seen the difficulty my life choices could cause in situations like this over the past few years. “I don’t blame him, I gotta lot of respect for someone that can live up to their principles. I just can’t cut free. He doesn’t even have any social media.” Rex said shaking his head like that was the most insane thing someone could ever do.

And just like that, Rex had framed it as something cooler, and not in a weird tin hat conspiracy theorist kind of way —well sort of in exactly that way, but better than I would have managed. Tin hat was still on the table, but it was due to my principles.

“My dad was actually like that,” Lana said softly biting her bottom lip, “He never had a smartphone once he found out how much information was sold out by apps. That’s pretty cool.”

And just like that, I was cool.

“But I’m almost always at my shop. Kate, my business partner, is there if I’m not and can pass a message if you ever need.”

“That’s how I tell him he’s being lazy,” Rex chimed in. “all the time, while I grab a coffee. Kate has a magical touch on the ancient steampunk looking machine Cal has, but it’s the best coffee in town.”

“Feel free to stop by,” I said, trying to step between Lana and Rex to block him from sight and let him know I didn’t need any more help, “I’ll let Kate know you get the friends and family discount, meaning free coffee.”

“­—It’s worth it.” Rex said, his footwork better than mine.

“That’s nice,” Lana said. “I guess I’ll see you around, Cal.”

I nodded, liking the way she said my name, “You too Lana.”

Then she left.

Most of the class was already gone by that point after Rex directed them to the best classes to participate in based on their skill level. A few other regulars were working out on the gym equipment but the immediate area around us was empty.

“You were flopping around like a fish!” Rex said as he slapped me on the shoulder, his laugh large and aggressive. “Has it been a while since you spoke to a girl?”

I muttered something incomprehensible while Rex continued, “You going to be more of a regular now? I know I sure would be.”

“I’ll be here. I was planning on coming more anyways, before I met Lana. But thanks for the help with the phone stuff.” I rubbed the back of my neck which was unsurprisingly as sore as the rest of me.

“Anytime, it’s a hard world to live in without some technology. Hopefully I got it right, is that not why you don’t have one?” His tone was genuine, but I could tell he was more interested in my answer than he was letting on.

“Oh, it is. I just never know how to explain it right and not sound crazy.”

Rex gave me a stone-cold face for a moment before smiling. You’d suck at poker, can’t lie to save your life. Kate and I have chatted about it, several times.” He said the last more conspiratorially.

“Poker?”

“No—You and tech. Keep up; you must be distracted… I wonder why?” He said rubbing the side of his jaw, face perplexed then morphing into extreme consternation as if trying to dream up a reason I could be distracted.

“I know you and Kate talk,” I said. “She also tells me you try to hire her yourself every time you come in.”

Rex let out a bellowing laugh. “Well, she never takes me up on it. You must be paying her well.”

“She’s actually going to be my business partner,” I said proudly. “As of today. She’s rolling out an online side of the shop.”

“Well damn,” Rex said staring absentmindedly out one of the windows, “I guess I’ll go give her a congratulations later, maybe try to poach her one last time.” He rubbed his chin as if deeply weighing his options.

“Thanks for the class. Even if I feel bruised, sore, and worse for coming in.” I said mockingly, rolling my shoulders.

“Anytime. Glad I’ll be seeing more of you,” he said with a knowing smile. “Hell, if I was younger and, in your shoes, I would be here at every class trying to get better and woo that girl. I saw the way she looked at you, before you even knew she was here.”

“Really?”

He gave me a pitying face, “Though, I think she’s more than you can handle.”

I groaned and shook my head. “I can handle a lot. Regardless, you will see me more. I promised a friend I’d get more training in. But I do have other things to do, I can’t come every day.”

“What, sitting and waiting for rocks to sell takes a lot of time?”

“Well, not when you make it sound like that’s all I do. It’s probably less time-consuming than instructing your clients on how to beat each other senseless while you watch, but it still takes work.”

“See—you got plenty of time.”

I laughed as Rex gave me another big pat on the back, “I’m rooting for ya.”

I walked back to my store, enjoying every moment of the cold air on the way as it soothed my aching body. I showered again, ate a quick protein bar and shake, not wanting to take more time to go out. Then I unboxed some of the new products I’d been sorting on a small table in my room the past few days. I took the best few specimens to the main floor once done and placed them on the shelving where they would catch the eye. It was busy, group after group came into the store which was phenomenal in what was usually our slower season. I let Kate take off early to think about things and return around six to go over our plans. She was ecstatic, though her plans had been curtailed by shoppers in the store.

It felt good to get lost in the work, I loved telling people about different stones, crystals, and where they came from. Kids were my favorite, and I had several pass-through who were very interested in the small fossil collection and polished stones set out at the perfect height for them to explore.

When it neared six, I dimmed the lights and flipped around the open sign, then locked the front door. It was made of glass but clouded to give some privacy. Kate would use the back door when she arrived. I then made the mistake of going downstairs and was immediately attacked by Fren.