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Chapter 42: Kisa's Struggle

Elsewhere aboard the Bloodbearer, Kisa Kindris, daughter of the Thülvik, meanders down the ship's hallways, flanked by Soren Mudrose on her left, and Megla Brighteye on her right. The three Kraktol females slowly pace about, with Megla chatting excitedly and pointing out various sights along the way, Soren keeping calm and nodding along to her sister's words, and Kisa following Megla's explanations with visible interest.

The three girls stop before a wide-open area amongst the corridors where the walls and ceiling appear to have been cut out and torn up, making room for a mid-sized repair facility. A single shuttle with room for fifteen passengers sits inside the room, suspended by wires and hovering via anti-gravity thrusters to keep it off the ground, while several dozen Kessu mill about, cutting and welding like crazy.

"-and over there, that's a new Craft Repair Bay we hacked together two weeks ago," Megla explains, pointing at the torn-up spaceship. "We had to rip out the walls and ceiling; you wouldn't believe what a pain it was getting that shuttle over here! We had to take out all the ship's volatile compounds, then teleport the shell into position! If we had overlooked even a drop of antimatter fuel or some random isotopes, boom! The entire ship could have blown up! No more Bloodbearer!"

"Wow," Kisa says, clutching both of her claws against her chest. "It's... it's so big..."

"I know, right? One thing you have to get used to; the Fiftieth Era shuttles on the Bloodbearer are often as big as the Third Era interceptors the Kraktol use for war. They're faster and deadlier, too, even though they barely have any armaments. It's crazy!"

Kisa and Megla exchange a few questions and answers, but the more Megla talks, the more apparent it becomes that Kisa's knowledge is surprisingly superficial.

"A... an Inverted Space Drive?" Kisa asks. "That's why you experienced seven months with the Precursor and not two? But... how does that work? I don't understand at all."

Megla scratches her head. "Err, I'm not sure, myself, half-sister. The Admiral explained different types of warp technology to us before, but it kinda went over my head, and now I've forgotten. Something about time dilation."

"Kyargh! I see..."

Kisa falls silent. She wrings her claws together, while an odd expression passes across her face.

Soren notices. "Is something the matter, Kisa?"

"Hm? Oh, no. It's nothing, Soren. I, I just... I've had trouble sleeping, recently. I'm always so tired. I don't have a lot of energy these days... haha..."

Soren nods. "Acting as the Malvik and attending to your duties must be exhausting. The life of a royal is fraught with troubles, or so I imagine."

Kisa lowers her head. "Yes. Something like that..."

A moment of awkward silence follows. Megla coughs loudly, then points down the hall, toward a set of double doors a quarter-mile away. "Kyargh! All this boring technical talk is lame! Kisa, why don't we go to the Mess Hall and get some food? Are you hungry?"

Kisa nods. "Um, yes, actually. I haven't eaten in about a day. Lately, my stomach's been rather upset."

"Aw, that's unfortunate," Megla says, sympathetically. "Well, I know what will cheer you up. You've never tried Terran food; it's to die for! They have all kinds of great meat-meals, like 'stayuk' and 'feelay minion'. Once you try 'stayuk,' you'll have a hard time eating boring Kraktol food ever again!"

Kisa's scales flush with embarrassment. "Oh, um, not to be rude, Megla... but I'm a vegetarian. I don't like eating meat."

"What?!" Megla shrieks, her mind momentarily freezing in shock. "A vegetarian? But... but how? All Kraktol hate tree-food! It tastes awful! We have trouble digesting it!"

"Yes, true..." Kisa mutters, "but I just can't bring myself to eat meat. It's kind of cruel, you know? Someone has to die in order for me to live. I don't like that... not one bit."

Soren's tail swishes back and forth. "Oh? Then you don't like the taste of vegetables, but ethically, you'd rather eat bad-tasting food than propagate the deaths of other beings?"

Kisa raises her head and nods. "Y-yes! I know, it's weird, right? Mother tries to force me to eat meat, but I always tell her I'd rather starve. She gives up for a while, then tries again later. She tells me about all the... the enemy corpses she ate when she became the Thülvik. Mother says it isn't honorable for the Malvik to ignore perfectly good meat when it's put before her. All I can do is close my mouth stubbornly and wait her out, but I always get so scared when she..."

Abruptly, Kisa falls silent. She stammers for a moment before shaking her head. "...It's nothing. Never mind. Um, does the food-place have vegetable food?"

Soren nods. "Yes. The Admiral sometimes eats vegetables, though he's the only crew-member who does. Last time I asked, he mentioned something about how 'Terrans need a balanced and healthy diet' and how all the members of his species were omnivores. He's an oddball, sometimes."

Kisa shrugs. "If the Admiral likes to eat vegetables... I bet we could become friends. I've never met anyone who liked eating anything other than meat. It's been a bit... isolating."

"Mmm." Megla grunts.

The three Kraktol women stroll down the hallway. They chat idly as they walk over to the Mess Hall. When the doors open, Kisa pauses for a moment to stare in surprise. Inside, two hundred bench-tables sit in aisles and rows, with at least three hundred Kessu mingling together in groups of four to six, babbling to one another about this or that. Several curious, wide-eyed gazes flick over in Kisa's direction. Some of the gazes turn hostile, while others contain only curiosity or apathy.

"Before your arrival, Umi announced to all the crew-members your identity, as well as Lord Drall's," Soren explains. "Don't worry, though. The Kessu are quite harmless. I'm sure you've heard many terrible things about them in your lifetime, but from what I've experienced, they haven't treated me or Megla badly."

Kisa nods. "I see. We have a few Kessu slaves on Dragua, as you know... but they always look so sad. Mother won't let me speak to them, s-so I've never interacted with their species at all."

A pained look appears in Kisa's eyes, but she simply lowers her head and tries to laugh it off. "Haha... there I go again with that down-in-the-dumps talk. Um, where do we get food?"

Megla gestures toward a dozen food synthesizers attached to the far walls. Before them, three dozen Kessu line up with bowls and plates held at the ready, waiting for their turn to choose a meal.

"Over there. Just grab a bowl or a plate, depending on what you want to eat. What sorts of vegetables do you prefer?"

"I'll eat anything," Kisa says bashfully. "Grass, leaves, you name it. Dragua doesn't have much available, as you know. I found some tasty fruit growing on a tree once... but then Mother ordered someone to cut it down and burn it..."

Soren gazes at Kisa out of the corner of her eye, but says nothing.

Megla, however, shakes her head angrily. "Grass? Leaves? Kyargh! That won't do! I'm surprised you can even walk after eating such terrible garbage! Here, take a plate and a bowl, and I'll show you all the menu options."

She slaps a plate and bowl in Kisa's hands, then grabs two plates for herself. Soren doesn't grab anything, due to having eaten only a few hours before, but she still follows along to keep Kisa and Megla company.

The two of them arrive at the back of the line. Up ahead, a fat, pot-bellied Kessu boy meows and trills loudly as he ponders his choices.

"Mraaw! So many choices! Machine person! Do you have any Podongo-meat?"

Umi speaks from above. "Negative, crew-member 'Skippy.' That ingredient does not appear in my databases."

"Praaw! What about Giant Beatley?"

"Negative, crew-member Skippy. That ingredient does not appear in my databases."

Behind Skippy, his friend, Rags, hisses in annoyance. "Come on, Skip! What's taking so long? Just pick something!"

"Hmph!" Skippy grunts. "A refined and elegant palate such as mine can only subsist on the finest culinary delights! Machine person! Show me your tastiest meats!"

The screen before him instantly changes, showing a wide variety of preview pictures, while Umi explains his choices. "According to the data I've gathered from the Kessu crew-members, I can display the top twenty food choices in order from most to least popular. As you can see, ranked at number one, the 'Chopped Liver' option appears with twenty one point seven percent of all Kessu crew having eaten it on three or more occasions. At number two, the 'Fatty Chicken' option ranks similarly, but with a higher percentage of Kessu crew-members returning for five or more meals, despite fewer trying it even once. At number three on the list..."

Umi reads out ten more options, while Skippy merely nods along and broods silently. Several Kessu behind him meow and hiss in exasperation, but he ignores their complaints.

"Come on, move it along!" An older female Kessu meows. "Just pick something! My feet are killing me! I've been scrubbing deckplates for six hours, you little brat!"

"What's the holdup?" Another male Kessu growls. "I don't have all day, tubby! Move that tail!"

Finally, after ten full minutes of hemming and hawing, Skippy makes his choice. He ends up taking four plates of Chopped Liver in his arms, all while the other Kessu scowl at him angrily. "Good grief! You even eat like a lard-ball! All that, just to pick the liver! Your parents didn't raise you right, boy!"

Skippy pauses. Before walking away, he turns to the last Kessu who spoke.

"...My parents died when the Kraktol attacked."

The others fall silent. They lower their heads guiltily, perhaps feeling ashamed for speaking so thoughtlessly.

Without another word, Skippy waddles away, his ears flat, and his posture stiff.

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"...Stupid," The older female Kessu mutters. "I shouldn't have said that. Now I feel like a jerk."

"Poor kid," another Kessu adds. "Maybe that's why he eats so much. Guess I can't blame him."

...

The line continues moving, much faster than before. Kisa listens to the Kessu's conversations and sighs.

"...The, erm... the Kraktol attack..."

Megla stares ahead stonily. "Yes. He lost his parents because of us."

"No. Because of Mother..." Kisa mutters. "She ordered the attack. You just did what you were told."

"Does that make it any better?" Megla asks. "I didn't protest. I didn't object. Now that kitten doesn't have a mother or a father. If you stand by and do nothing, you're part of the problem. That's what the Admiral taught me."

Kisa sighs. "I see."

All three of the Kraktol fall silent. The next few minutes pass quickly as they saunter up to the menu screen. Megla activates it, then begins swiping through a list of meats and vegetables.

"So, as you can see here, half-sister, you can choose from a bunch of pre-made meals, or you can create and customize a personal dish. Just pick some ingredients, follow the directions, and the ship will 'poof' a meal into existence for you."

Kisa follows along with Megla's directions, while Soren occasionally offers helpful suggestions. Not one of the three women knows anything about vegetables, making them laugh several times as they examine the strange and wondrous Terran cuisine options.

"Car-rot? Bro-ko-lie? Haha, these vegetables have such funny names! And look, there are fruits, too, like app-lee and orr-aang. Which of these looks best to you?"

Kisa hesitates. "...A-all of them look good. I've never... I've never seen so many tasty things that weren't made of meat..."

Slightly taken aback, Megla glances at Soren, then back to Kisa. "Kyargh! Then why choose? Just try them all! The Admiral says that as long as we stay above a planet with biomatter, our food reserves will remain full! Eat whatever you like!"

Drops of drool congeal at the edges of Kisa's long, crocodilian mouth. "Really? It's okay if I do?"

"Of course! You are our guest, half-sister! Eat as much as you want!"

Kisa sets down the plate and bowl, then hastily taps several options for the juiciest, ripest fruits and vegetables among the preview images. "O-okay, then! I'll try this one, and this one... and um, maybe this one too!"

Within seconds, multiple beams of light zap into the bowl and atop the plate, materializing as apples, oranges, lettuce, and other sorts of vegetarian-friendly food options. Kisa takes her food, clearly excited by what she's about to eat. "Um, where can I sit? There are Kessu at all of the tables..."

Megla points toward a mostly empty bench some distance away, one where the older Kessu lady from earlier has taken a seat by herself, nibbling on a small plate of fish. "Just sit over there. Soren and I will join you in a moment, once I get my food."

"Okay!"

Kisa walks over to the table and hesitates as she glances at the tiny little grandmother Kessu plunked on the table's opposite side. She pauses awkwardly and clears her throat. "Erm, kyargh! I, I, uh... I would like to sit here! Is that... alright?"

The Kessu lady frowns. "Kss. Sit wherever you like. I don't care."

"Um... a-alright, then."

Kisa slides onto the bench, taking a seat at the furthest possible corner from the lady, not daring to make eye contact. Her grumpy appearance gives her an unapproachable aura, which, when mixed with Kisa's lack of knowledge regarding the Kessu in general, makes the Malvik hesitant to say anything.

Moments later, Kisa reaches down and plucks an apple out of the bowl. She glances behind herself, where Megla and Soren chat quietly, while Megla picks her food. After debating over whether or not it would be impolite to eat before they arrive, Kisa's hunger wins out. She quickly places the apple in her mouth and bites down, crushing it with several hundred pounds of bite pressure.

Immediately, sweet and delicious juices flow across her tongue. The Malvik squeaks in surprise, barely containing herself as she experiences the wonders of Terran fruits.

"Mmm... it's... it's so good..." Kisa mutters.

The Malvik quickly grabs another item out of the bowl, this time an orange. She puts in in her mouth and bites down, crushing it into a citrusy pulp. Instead of the sweet, candy-like taste of the apple, a terrible and acrid taste floods her senses.

"Ack! Kerk! Eww, that one was... that was weird..."

Kisa gags audibly, making the Kessu woman frown harder than before. "Hiss! Do you mind? I'm trying to eat, here. You don't hear me making all kinds of sickening noises, do you?"

Still gagging, Kisa chokes out an apology. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude... it's just- it's the first time I've eaten such tasty food... haha."

"The first time? Hmph. Doubtful..." The Kessu says. "You think I don't know who you are? We all do. You're the daughter of that 'thool-pick' person. You're royalty."

Kisa's awkward smile fades, ever so slightly. "Well... I mean, yes, I am. But... I don't really eat good food or anything there. Everyone I know eats meat, but I prefer fruits and vegetables, and-"

"Do I look like I care?" The grandmother Kessu snaps. "I don't want to hear your blubbering. Just shut up and eat your nasty fruit in silence."

Kisa's scales lose some of their color. "I'm... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude, miss..."

The Malvik falls silent, losing much of the excitement she felt from earlier. Numbly, she reaches into the bowl and pulls out a kiwi, then gently puts it in her mouth and bites down slowly, trying not to make any noise whatsoever.

Despite the fruit's delicious taste, she doesn't emote or show any excitement, instead opting to eat it slowly. She barely even enjoys its unique flavor, instead replaying the Kessu's words in her mind over and over.

Suddenly, the grandmother Kessu snaps. "Oh, Wind-Mother guide me! What, is the food not good enough for you, your highness? You were laughing it up just a minute ago, but now you look like you're attending a funeral! Hmph. Do you even know what a funeral is? I do! I lost my entire litter because of you! Because of your dreadful thool-pick! All of my kittens and grand-kittens burned in a fire, while my husband died trying to save them, but look at you! Just sitting here, munching on that fruit without a care in the world!"

Her rage intensifies. "I lost my home, my litter, and everyone else I loved! My home used to have over three hundred villagers, but now there aren't even a dozen of us! That day the fire fell from the skies, I watched helplessly while they screamed in pain and burned alive! But I couldn't do anything. I was old and useless. Worthless, just a stupid old woman!"

"Now look at me..." She concludes. "I scrub this ship daily, because it's all I can do. It's all I have. My only hope is that someday, the Admiral turns this big giant metal machine against you. I hope he burns your planet to the ground! I hope the Admiral rips your thool-pick apart and tortures him until he begs for mercy! That's all I have to live for. That's my only reason to go on."

The Kessu jerks her head away, then gets up from her chair and lowers her gaze.

"You disgust me. I hope you die a horrible death."

Kisa, stricken silent, stares blankly as the Kessu woman hobbles away, leaning on nearby tables to support her weak and creaky knees.

Several other nearby Kessu turn to look in Kisa's direction, their feline ears having heard everything the woman said. They shoot dirty glares at Kisa, nodding along silently to the grandmother's words. Some of them even whisper among each other, quietly brooding amongst themselves as they recall her emotion-packed speech.

...Kisa lowers her eyes. She vacantly gazes at the bowl of fruit before her, most of it untouched.

Her head reels, as does her stomach. A swimming sensation takes her, as the Kessu grandmother's words replay in her head.

It isn't long before images of her mother, Loreen, appear in the back of her mind as well.

Pathetic. What sort of Kraktol can't eat meat? You're a disgrace.

You'll take my place as the Thülvik someday, but that doesn't mean I have to be happy about it. I'll be damned if I let some gutless coward lead my beloved Kraktol empire.

Go on! Kill him! Stop wasting my time! He's only a slave!

There, that wasn't so hard, was it? Do you see that miserable look on his face? Seems he pissed and shit himself just before the lights went out. As expected of Mallali scum.

Just eat it, you little brat. It's meat! You are a Rodak! What sort of deviant doesn't like meat? You're embarrassing me!

...

"Kisa? Are you okay?"

Megla sits down beside Kisa, frowning as she notices the barely touched bowl of fruit. "I thought you were hungry? Weren't you looking forward to all those icky- I mean, all those delicious fruits and vegetables?"

Kisa nods numbly. "Fruits... vegetables..."

Megla rests a hand on Kisa's back. "What's wrong? Are you sick? Did one of those fruits give you a stomachache? I warned you they might not be good for you. We Kraktol can only properly digest meat after all, haha..."

Her voice barely a whisper, Kisa's jaw begins to tremble.

"This... this was a mistake. I don't belong here. I shouldn't have come..."

Soren appears at Kisa's side. She looks at Kisa with the eyes of someone who realizes something has gone horribly wrong. "Kisa? We're here for you, okay? What's the matter? Do you want to go somewhere... private?"

The red-scaled Kraktol flicks her eyes around the cafeteria. She instantly picks up on dozens of hostile gazes aimed in Kisa's direction, though many of the perpetrators sheepishly avert their eyes when they see Soren scanning the room.

Kisa's entire body trembles. "I... I shouldn't... I don't belong here... hic... it's not right... I'm bad, very bad..."

Without warning, Kisa jumps up from her seat. Her sudden movement startles Megla and Soren, making them both flinch and pull back a half-step. In the instant they pull away, Kisa climbs out of the table and rushes toward the exit door.

"H-hey, wait!" Megla shouts, completely confused by Kisa's sudden flurry of emotion. "Wha-what's wrong? What's going on?"

Before Megla and Soren can follow Kisa, she's already fled through the Mess Hall's double doors, leaving them in her dust.

The entire cafeteria goes silent. Even the Kessu at the far end of the room who didn't witness what happened with Kisa and the grandmother Kessu take notice now and start whispering among each other.

Soren stops her pursuit, then immediately turns to the nearest table. "Hey! You must have seen what happened. Why did Kisa leave like that? Did one of you say something to her?"

The table full of male Kessu doesn't reply. They only flatten their ears and look away, too ashamed to say anything.

"Come on! Speak!" Soren shouts, projecting her voice across the cafeteria. "One of you saw something! Don't play stupid with me."

Frustrated, Soren turns her attention upward, intending to ask Umi. Before she can ask the synthmind, a young male Kessu pipes up.

"Hmph! That lady got what she deserved."

Soren turns her attention toward the voice's direction, only to see Skippy and Rags sitting at one of the nearby tables. The chonker-Kessu slaps his belly and laughs. "What? I'm not afraid to speak my mind! That lady is the daughter of the tool-pick! She's the reason my mother and father are gone. She can die for all I care!"

"Y-yeah!" Another Kessu says, feeling emboldened by Skippy's words. "I lost my wife in that attack, and it was all because of the tool-pick's orders. I ain't got no sympathy for her daughter! Evil runs in the blood, that's what my grandfather always said!"

Soren and Megla stand together and remain silent, listening as one Kessu after another pipes up. They quickly come to realize what happened thanks to bits and pieces of information delivered by the more boisterous Kessu sitting nearby.

Megla balls her claws into fists. "Is that what you think? You think evil runs in the blood?"

The male Kessu from before nods emphatically. "Mraww, obviously!"

"Idiot!" Megla shouts, pointing her finger at him. "Bajira, I thought we were friends! Don't you know Kisa is my half-sister? If she is evil, then so am I! How could you say that about my blood relative?"

Bajira falters. "Err, but... that's not the same thing! You're one of the good ones, not like the other Kraktol. You and Soren have been kind to us and treated us right. That little thool-pick daughter though, she's different! Her father ordered the attack on our people!"

Soren's expression remains emotionless. "You're wrong. Out of Kisa, Megla, and myself, Kisa holds the least blame for what happened to your relatives. I was the tactical commander aboard the Dragon's Breath, while Megla was the second in command. We had more political control, as well as blame, for what happened to your families than Kisa ever did. You looked down on her purely because of her title. You didn't even try to understand her situation before rushing to judgment."

Megla shakes with rage. Still, she swallows some of her anger. "I... I know what happened to all of you was awful. I do! But... don't you see? You hurt Kisa for reasons beyond her control, reasons she had nothing to do with, just like Soren and I did to you. Even so, you all have, for the most part, accepted my sister and I as friends. We've hurt you infinitely more than Kisa ever has!"

"So, please!" Megla adds, "If you're going to hate anyone, don't hate Kisa. Hate me! Hate Soren! We're the evil ones here, not Kisa. My half-sister is a kind and loving Rodak, far moreso than I could ever be. If you can't find the empathy within yourselves to treat her as you would me... then I'd rather you all just stopped being my friends!"

The red-scaled Kraktol violently punches her chest, beating herself in grief. Without another word, she storms out of the cafeteria, leaving Soren behind.

Soren falls silent. She shakes her head and sighs. "You've all disappointed me. Anger, I can understand. But attacking someone unrelated without knowing the full situation? It's illogical. It's despicable. I feel the same as Megla in this regard."

She slowly exits the Mess Hall, leaving behind all of the Kessu who, only moments before, cheerfully insulted Kisa and disparaged her thoughtlessly.

Several Kessu, including Skippy himself, flatten their ears and look at one another guiltily.

"...M-maybe we went too far..." Skippy mutters. "I mean... I didn't even know that Kraktol lady at all. I guess I ought to, uh... apologize."

Rags nods. "We were all angry, but that doesn't excuse the way we looked at her, Skip. If we run into her later, maybe we should try to get to know her a little, eh?"

"Yeah. Maybe."

Skippy pokes at the liver on his plate, then sulkily shoves a piece in his mouth.

"I just... miss my mom and dad... so much."