“I’m so exhausted.” Lars exclaimed 

He had just finished bringing up the last of his boxes into his new apartment building. After setting down a vase he made his way to his bed and kicked his shoes off. Lying back on his mattress he stared at the wood paneling of his ceiling as he recounted the events over the last few days.

For the last month Lars' life had been nothing but hell as far as he was concerned. His parents had passed three weeks prior in a horrible car accident. He wasn’t that broken up about his parent’s untimely death, they weren’t all that affectionate with him growing up. They only ever called him when they needed something and after being rejected would ignore his existence for months on end. Yes truly there was no familial love in the McCoy household.

Though Lars had no need for the love of his petty parents, instead he devoted himself to his true passion, anime. Lars found in anime the thing that was always denied to him from his own family: love, adventure, acceptance. Truly Lars McCoy was the living embodiment of the Neet movement. As if the NEETs of America need a face for a presidential campaign Lars face would be plastered on buses and billboards.

His family became more and more frustrated/disgusted with him as his obsession grew. They would shout things at him like “You're almost 28, get a wife already!” 

“What utter fools they were.” Lars always told himself. “Don’t they know when one has tasted the fruit of 2D girls nothing ever tastes as sweet again.”

Lars knew he was a pervert and a degenerate but he was at peace with himself. To him everyone else was the weird ones unwilling or too cowardly to embrace their true selves. So he dedicated to distance himself from these ignorant fools and embraced all the pleasure that 2D had to offer.

That's when after years of ignoring each other his younger siblings called him to inform him of their parents death. They had agreed to meet and to make the proper arrangements for their funerals. After everything was said and done the funeral passed and some of his siblings had the decency to shed crocodile tears at the wake. Soon the group of young adults met with the family lawyer and discussed the will his parents left behind.

After all the charity donations and last attempts to buy their way into heaven they left generous sums to their four children. His oldest sister got the Yacht and beach house. The younger brother got the company plane as well as the art collection. His youngest sister received their parents' real estate in Las Vegas. While Lars himself was named heir and given ownership to their nation wide company.

His siblings gave him expected gazes and even a hint of envy, but Lars' face just contorted like he had bitten into a lemon. Of course they would make one last backstab before they croaked. Even death couldn’t prevent them from laying their bricks of expectations down on his shoulders. Therefore there was only one answer he could give.

“Don’t wanna!” He shouted.

His siblings all gasped at the same time.

“Big brother, what do you mean?” His oldest sister asked, clearly concerned.

“I don’t want the company you all can have it.” He said back resolutely.

His oldest sister fainted at his words while his other two siblings began to bicker and yell at him. Calling him selfish and an ecchi idiot. His youngest sister was the one being the most unreasonable out of the lot. She clung to his leg until his pants started to tear. Unfortunately Lars was as stubborn as a mule when it came to his otaku way of life. His family however refused to accept it.

“If you refuse Lars the company will go under!” His brother shouted.

“He’s right, you're the only one who can do it.” His oldest sister added after regaining consciousness. 

“Don't care, not my problem.” He replied back crossing his arms.

“Why are you so stupid big brother?!”

“I’m never contacting you again, mom and dad were right about you!”

“Yes, yes how sad I’ll be I 'll never have to deal with you blood sucking parasites again.” He said with a shrug.

Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

His youngest sister looked ready to burst into tears at his words, while the other two just looked down at the ground biting their lips. After some negotiating Lars sold his shares to his family’s company and received a hefty 5 million dollar buyout. Once he got his money he promptly moved his happy ass away from the rainbow flag state and all the nut jobs who lived there. He settled on the east coast and bought himself a one bedroom one bath apartment.

A happy smile grew across Lars face as he continued to lay on his bed and stare at the ceiling.

Phew

“I’m finally free!” He shouted to himself with excitement. “I’ve dealt with the whole lot of them, I’m free!”

He could now live his life free from the 3D worlds expectations and cares. Now he could dedicate his heart and soul to the world of 2D and become the king of Otakus. 

“Oh thank you mother and father.” He smiled. “Thank you for passing on at such an opportune time.”

He knew these thoughts made him scummy and immoral, but why should he care? It's not like he was the one to cause the car accident. Besides those standards were for the 3D world which he had already left behind. All things considered he had already won at the game of life.

Lars then got up and began to rearrange his new apartment which he had already dubbed his sanctuary. It would be his safe haven against the perils of the outside world, his bat cave in a way. The rules for this sanctuary were simple: 1) No discussing three dimensional topics politics, religion, etc.

2) No foreign relations to taint his Sanctuary. That meant no girlfriends or otherwise. This rule was especially important to Lars since to him women were nothing but bags of irrationality and contradictions. And 3) No working on anything that interrupts his Otaku time. This was important since he had just escaped the work of 3D so he had no interest in going back. After all, all work and no play made Lars a dull boy.

These 3 rules or better yet laws would be the shield that protects him from the responsibilities he had so desperately escaped. Lars was moved to near tears as he looked upon the plague on his wall that displayed his new laws. He had never been so moved in his life, could Isaac Newton have been this moved when he discovered his 3 laws of motion.  

Though Lars was aware that most “upstanding” members of society would disagree with his way of life. He never understood why people insisted on pushing their ways of life onto other people. It was a tale as old as time he guessed when a nation would invade a neighboring country and impose their own ideologies even if they didn’t want it. 

“Yes, go get married and have some healthy, beautiful children that will cut your throat and take everything you have.” He thought to himself.

Yes it was true Lars had become an utterly pessimistic person. He hadn’t always been this way but years of seeing man’s greed, idiocy, and self destructive nature had ruined his opinion on man. Though the straw that broke the camel's back, was at his parents' wake where he watched his sibling all plot to off the others in an attempt to get their portion of the inheritance. After watching such a fiasco unfold between three “loving” siblings. Lars had quietly and politely crumbled up his hopes and tossed them in the trash bin on his way out.

It was just a simple fact of the universe: the strong thrive and the weak suffer. The law of the jungle that our lizard brain seemed to have forgotten. The strong take from the weak, it was as simple as that. Those that chose to stay weak had no business complaining about fairness.

“I need a drink.” Lars declared aloud.

To kick off his carefree life Lars made his way to the local convenience store, and bought a few cases of beer and some microwave dinners. He wasn’t much of a cook and he wasn’t gonna start now. After thanking the cute cashier he made his way home and began to indulge. After the 9th drink he started to get woozy and made his way to bed. Looking up at his ceiling once more Lars just gave a drunken smile.

“Goodbye work.”

“Goodbye responsibilities.”

The sound of snoring then filled the apartment.

-six months went by in the blink of an eye.

Lars had conquered every manga and every anime he hadn’t been able to enjoy for the last eight years. 

“What a beautiful life.” 

He said aloud before letting out a burp. Lars had only been eating microwave dinners and drinking everything but water. His room was a pigsty and he was surrounded by old empty cans of ramen noodles and coca cola cans. The processed foods and beverages weren’t doing his body any favors and he now resembled a silverback gorilla with a five o clock shadow. 

But Lars didn’t have time to worry about such inconsequential things at the moment. Not when he was in the middle of the greatest war of his life. He was playing the newest online RPG game when surround sound, and his opponent had been the toughest he had ever faced. 

“Perhaps he is a true man of culture like myself.” He wondered as he continued to face off against his opponent. 

After several hours of intense clicking, Lars finally emerged victorious. It had taken several energy drinks but he had managed to find the will to win against this worthy adversary. Laying his head across the desk he let out loud wheezing, it had been a long time since something actually made him struggle.

Suddenly an email entered his gmail. It was from an unknown user and had no return address. After a moment of hesitation he decided to click on it. What popped up made his eyes widen.

[Do you enjoy this world?]

It was a single sentence but it held such meaning that it made Lars completely taken aback. 

“Ah he truly is a man of culture huh.” Lars smiled, having found a kindred spirit.

It took him less than five seconds to respond. Lars wrote back clear and concise sentences that completely displayed his contempt for the 3D world around him. He figured that this anonymous person probably felt the same way. After sending back a reply ten seconds later another message popped up.

[If you could, would you escape?]

Lars' heart was moved so deeply after reading this message. It was the first time in his life someone truly understood his frustrations and pain. He understood he was violating one of his 3 laws but he couldn’t resist.

[Yes] he wrote back.

Suddenly his monitor began to glow as a bright white light emitted from it. Lars' senses went numb. A low ringing in his ear that made him deaf, along with the bright light which blinded him left him completely disoriented about what was happening. Suddenly he felt himself engulfed in a cocoon of light and felt his very essence being dragged away. Everything began to feel distant as the world around him was peeled away.

He kept trying to blink but he couldn’t comprehend what he was seeing.

It was as if an invisible hand had him in its tight grip and was dragging him across space.

Suddenly everything stopped and Lars found himself surrounded in an endless void of darkness. As he was about to make a comment a message binged in his head.

[Welcome player, the tutorial will now commence.]

“WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!!!” He screamed as his voice echoed across the vast ocean of nothingness.