Damhnait was standing there, staring at the men as he clutched his neck. I looked at him too, but he wouldn't have more than a minute left in him, if he was unlucky. Most likely within a couple of seconds he would lose conscious. I ignored him and walked towards Damhnait, sheathing my sword back into its leather, and dropping my shield so I could hold her closer to me.
That was what I wanted to do, but she shot her face towards me, her eyes wider and her expression terrified, taking a step back for each step I took closer to her. Seeing her look at me with such a face hurt me, but I could guess at what she had gone through. She was panicking and I was lucky she didn't throw the spear into my own back. She had likely picked it up from the hands of the man I initially cut the throat of.
"Dam, it's me, Elgin. Calm down, no one's going to hurt you now. It's alright." I tried to keep my voice level, smooth and neutral. It had succeeded, up until my voice cracked upon saying, 'alright.' Damhnait stopped walking backwards, and I stopped moving forward. Letting her piece together what is happening, and what just happened, without pressuring her too much. "It's Elgin, your brother. You're safe with me." I'm not sure how safe she was exactly, but she certainly would be safer around me.
Damhnait stood there, staring at my eyes. I could feel some form of presence return to them, gone was the wild look, and the posture that screamed she was planning on either running, or savagely fighting me, whichever was better. Her voice broke, finally, and she spoke. "Elgin?" I nodded, unsure if she could see my nod.
"Yes, your older brother, Elgin."
She collapsed right there, on her knees. Panting, her eyes down and facing the ground. I quickly knelt next to her, checking around her for any wounds. Beyond what looked like a head injury, blood covering her forehead, hair, and her left eye, she looked fine. She would recover from that, she's faced worse. As much as I wanted to let her have her rest, I needed information. What had happened? Where is everyone else? Are there any other survivors? Dark thoughts started to boil from where I tried to hide them. I needed information, and I can't let myself fall to despair.
"Dam, are you alright? What happened to everyone else?" I asked, placing my hand gently on her shoulder. My voice was gentler than I thought I could make it. But that didn't mean much, her head jolted upward, her eyes once again facing me directly. Her face, slightly scarred from too many years spent roughhousing, was pale. Even in the moonlight I could tell. Her eyes gradually grew in size, before she grabbed my arm and tried to get herself standing back up. Her legs were shaking, and the suddenness of the movement almost toppled me down, on top of her.
But I had enough reflexes to counter act the tug. I pulled her up on to her knees, steadying her on her feet with my hands firmly on her shoulders. I could feel how small she was, and she certainly was small compared to me. She stood roughly to my own shoulders. But that didn't matter right now. Through the feeling of her slight quivering, she began to try to get out of my grip. She wanted to run towards the village, but I couldn't let her. I didn't know who was out there, and there would certainly be men around our house.
"Let go." She said, her voice course and the first signs of tears could be heard within in. I didn't let go. She repeated herself, a bit louder each time, until I finally clasped her as close to my body as I could, into a hug, and her own squirming finally began to die down. Her eyes were again cloudy with panic, and I waited for them to clear up once again.
"What happened?"
"Men came. They, they killed everyone. Mom tried to defend me, told me to run, pushed me away. She was outnumbered, and she didn't have any weapons. I didn't run. I watched as everyone was butchered, and I couldn't do a thing. I'm a coward, a filthy, wretched coward, and the same men who had killed our family wanted me dead as well. Or worse. Only when I realized my life was in danger did I run."
Her voice was dreadfully quiet. Almost like a whisper, I had to put every ounce of concentration on hearing her. She didn't let out tears, the feeling might've left her the moment she stopped resisting against my hold against her. I hugged her closer, and then quickly parted away from her, looking her in the eyes. She wasn't crying, more of a surprised look on her face. I didn't know how to tell her she didn't do anything wrong, my voice caught within my throat and I couldn't force it out. Instead I let go, and walked towards my shield and picked it back up.
Cold hatred seeped into my limbs. I could feel exhaustion finally, but that didn't stop the tingling feeling of uncontrolled anger from exploding through my body. I wanted to do everything I could to get back on those men, the men who had slaughtered my family. Perhaps I and Damhnait had already killed them, their corpses laying beside us. The only thing stopping me from running and killing as many as I could before my own demise, which would certainly come as I was outnumbered, and the villagers who I had abandoned probably being annihilated as I sit here and think, was the realization of Damhnait's presence.
My priories were misaligned. Blood first, everything else second.
"What do you want to do?" My voice shocked me, more than it shocked Damhnait, I saw her within the corner of my eye jump in attention. It was cold, calculating, but at the same time painfully impatient. Damhnait looked at me, considering my words more carefully.
"I want them dead, Ergin. I want to kill those men with my own hands, I want them to feel pain for what they've done to us."
"And what will become of you, then? Am I supposed to let you die, letting you get raped, murdered, and then without ceremony, throw into a ditch, at best? Am I supposed to get myself killed, and you to whatever fate they will decide for you?" I didn't want to be so harsh, and most of the hate within my voice was directed towards me. But I needed her to be convinced, and to be the one to convince to me, that dying for vainglory when there was still a way to truly get back at these men was beyond retarded.
Damhnait shook at that. Perhaps she didn't understand the situation, the shear amount of men that had outnumbered us. This was planned, and they wanted the entire village to be exterminated. Perhaps they wanted to take our women, as well, but given that they killed even the youngest of my siblings, they didn't want that either.
"So what!? I should've already been killed, twice over! I couldn't protect mom, nor little Faolán, not Nessa and not the cows either! I couldn't even protect myself without your help."
I quickly walked over to Damhnait and slapped her across the face. Her voice was getting too loud, and I could already hear some of the men beginning to make their way into the forest. She wasn't shouting, but I wouldn't be surprised to know they had heard us.
"They're coming. Follow me." Damhnait, held her cheek, her eyes glaring daggers into me, but still nodded. "We will consider this later. For now, I want you safe, Dam. Please, follow me."
I walked over to the slain swordsmen and retrieved the sword from his hands and his sheath from his belt, Damhnait closely behind me. Perhaps she grew meek after the slap. She was strange, anytime dad would get angry enough to hit her she would grow to be as meek as she was acting now. But, no matter what I did to her she'd always act defianty against me. Perhaps she's grown to see me more like an older brother than an annoying friend, finally?
I gave Damhnait the sword and his sheath and started to jog deeper into the forest. I could hear her following closely behind me as well. Checking my tunic for any signs of further blood, and being glad there was none and that the cut I had received truly was superficial, I continued to jog into the night, keeping at a pace that Damhnait could also keep up with. In a night like this the men aren't likely to find us, although it would certainly be wise to go as far away before morning.
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I had already hatched a plan. A terribly rough one, but one that I would have to rely on if I wanted to survive. Or rather, one I had to rely on if I wanted to enact revenge. My honor depends entirely on whether or not I could do this successfully, and if I fail I would've left my father and my village to die. I wanted to yell, but that would only alert the men of our presence.
But I had to keep my breathing smooth and consistent.
After roughly two hours of running, Damhnait spoke her first protest. Her voice came between ragged gasps, her hands clutching at my tunic as if to catch up. I had been lost in my thoughts, thinking about the number of men I needed, and what could've motivated these men to annihilate us in such a way. Such an act wasn't entirely unprecedented, but certainly it was rare. And never, ever did it end well for the offending people. But it was rarely without any justification.
I was certainly tired, yes, but not as tired as Damhnait. I had forgotten about her in all this jogging, I'm lucky she didn't accidentally trip, pass out, or worse. I would've lost her, then.
"Stop, please, I can't," another bout of breathing came, Damhnait placing her hands on her thighs, face down and trying to catch her breath. "I can't go on. Let's rest, I'm sure we've ran far enough now."
"Alright. Let's rest for half an hour, but afterwards we'll continue to walk. The further, the better. The further away from our village we walk, the better our odds will be we won't meet the tribes of those who slaughtered our own tribe. You understand? We'll be on the run for weeks, at best." I sat down next to a tree and watched Damhnait fall down onto the dirt. She certainly wasn't without endurance, but she didn't live the life I had lived. She wasn't use to jogging for hours on end, and frankly neither was I. But I had plenty of conditioning doing other things.
I focused on the my breathing, taking deep breaths in and out until that finally stopped being necessary. My limbs felt like stones, and I wanted to do nothing but sleep. And I had started to suspect that is exactly what Dam had fallen into.
"Dam? You awake?" I inquired.
"Yeah." She spoke back. I guess my worries were unfounded. With all that had happened recently sleeping might not be the first thing on her mind.
"Good. Don't fall asleep. We'll need to walk."
"Uh huh." She certainly wasn't all that committed if that's all she could give back.
I listened to her breathing, and gave most of my attention to the sound. A light rasp could be heard, not terrible but perhaps she was pushing herself beyond her body's ability to handle. Maybe it is wise to let her rest for longer. But, how well of trackers the men are isn't known to me. If we slept through the night, our cowardice will be granted a terrible ending. I can't let that happen. So I resolved myself, I didn't want Damhnait to suffer beyond what she had already.
"Want me to carry you?" I said, making my offer. Hopefully she'll let me. She isn't all that heavy to begin with. Roughly ninety pounds, I'd guess. I could walk with her on my back for a couple of hours, at least. Even with how sore my legs are.
"What?"
"You heard me. Want me to carry you on my back?"
"Why?"
"Aren't you tired? I want you to rest, your breathing doesn't sound all that good."
Damhnait didn't speak for a while, leting her breathing fill in as the blank noise. "Y'don't gotta," she finally gave her opinion.
"That's not a no."
"Yeah, it's not." She agreed with that sentiment.
"You're not that heavy, you know. I could let you rest on my back for a couple of hours, it wouldn't be that big a deal."
Damhnait rolled over onto her belly and pushed herself onto her knees, then got up with shaky legs onto her feet. She looked over to me, in a posture that looked unstable. She began to walk, her legs shaking but gradually gaining back its natural grace. But she suddenly stopped, a couple of feet away from where she started.
"I can walk."
I got up and showed her the ease with which I could move. Sure, my legs were sore and I really wanted to lie down for a while, but I could walk like this for a long, long time. I wouldn't be a good warrior if I couldn't do at least this much. I pushed her slightly just to see how she'd react. Not very well, considering the light shove I gave her toppled her onto her behind.
"Can you?" I asked.
She looked up to me, half tired and half glaring. She didn't nod, or speak. Instead I crouched down so that she could crawl onto my back, regardless of her assent. If she didn't want to, then she could start walking on her own. After a couple of moments, I could hear her movements, and then feel her arms and legs position themselves comfortably over me. She held me by the neck, and I grabbed her by the fold of her knees. This might be slightly more tiring than I thought, but I'll grit through it.
Standing back up I started to walk. I vaguely knew where I was going, and that direction held no villages for long, long miles. Eventually I'll leave the bosom of Máthair mountain, and into the lesser hills that stood in front of her. The first priority is survival, but I knew how to hunt, and how to build shelters and camps. The second would be finding a village that wasn't hostile to our presence. This wouldn't be that difficult, provided that any village I happen upon isn't hostile to my clan. I could make myself useful as a warrior.
There were many paths leading from one village to another, once I find one I could find any other. I knew basic geography, where certain clans hold their stakes, but the details get foggier and foggier the further away I go from my original village. Both a good and bad thing. But, mostly a bad thing. There would likely be less bad blood between strangers, the only benefit.
On another note, my spiritual sight has been allowing me to see something I hadn't picked up on before. Webs of white ran through my body, a bright light emanating from the center of my heart. This was new. Some of it could be seen on my sister, as well, but it wasn't as widely spread as my own. I didn't focus much on it, but I got the feeling it was slowly growing and increasing in area across every inch of me. But it didn't feel like a malady, instead it felt like a form of raw power.
This was significantly less important than making sure I don't trip and drop Damhnait onto the ground, she'd be very angry with that.
She had been resting her chin on the right side of my shoulder, her breathing stopped coming from her mouth and instead was through her nose. Which maybe wasn't so good for her, I must've smelled awful.
"You stink."
Well, I don't need to speculate, I got it straight out of her mouth.
"Want to walk on your own, then?"
Damhnait hugged my neck closer, bringing her face closer to my own, and shook her head. Perhaps she was just trying to be snarky. I started to chuckle, and continued my long walk towards some destination I didn't yet know.
---
Morning had came. I was still walking, Damhnait asleep on my back. My legs were starting to cramp terribly, and my breathing was starting to hurt. There wasn't enough energy left in me to continue carrying her, so I spoke up to wake her. It didn't take much prodding to have her wake up, she was definitely asleep but I can't imagine it being all that deep considering the morning sun and my constant jostling. Sometimes I could hear her whisper names, but I could never figure out which or whose.
"Wha-" her head lifted itself off my shoulder and, from what I could imagine, started to look around. Her body tensed up, and I could feel her beginning to try to run.
"Calm down, girl. It's fine. I'm tired, and I think it's about time we had you walk on your own."
"Wha? Oh. Oh. Elgin, it's just you." I had stopped walking, preparing to let Damhnait walk on her own two feet. I crouched down and felt her weight come off me, very much to my relief.
"It's morning, then? Damn, you've carried me for a while, huh." I nodded at that. I sat down and then splayed myself on the ground. Dam was wiping sleep out of her eyes, but she's still considerably more well rested than I was.
"It's your turn to carry me now, then." I said, dead pan.
"That wasn't part of the deal, so no." Darn.
"You ingrate. If you won't carry me then help me get on my feet," I extended my hands and waited for her to grab them. She did so, thankfully, and pulled me up. She had enough strength to do that, which was definitely good. Having got up, I gave my thanks, and got a thanks instead of a 'you're welcome' back, then I continued to walk. Towards a destination I didn't yet know, but was likely very, very far.