Chapter 14: Fire

What is fire?

Fire is the process of burning down combustible materials, which in turn produces heat and light, and at times smoke. Historians say the discovery of fire is what led to the modern civilization we have today. Wow, isn't fire just amazing? Something lighter than air being able to move empires.

That's right, fire, especially this fire, is an immaculate ruby brimming with warmth and intensity. It sings to us a lament with its every crackle. Its warmth is indiscriminate, embracing both the living and dead in this mock twilight. The nauseating stench of burning flesh is really the only thing ruining the experience.

Liri and I sit on the cold stone floor, the dark elf clutching her caramel legs together, while her partymates' corpses burn in a huge bonfire I made and their apparent killer just stands behind us staring at me like a creep. Isn't this a surreal scenario? 

Our eyes glow red-orange watching the flames grow higher and their bodies break down into something horrific. I wonder how long until the fire reaches everything and burns it all to ashes?

"How'd you make a fire this big without chanting? You must be a chantless magician."

"Nope. It's just good old blackpowder."

"Blackpowder? What's that?"

"It's basically, uh, a blackish powder taken from certain rocks that easily catches fire. Like magic sand, minus the magic."

"Heh, that's interesting."

"Yup."

Tick, tock, tick, tock...

I am trapped in this moment, watching the flames slowly melt the skin off the bones of the people I had a fun drink with last night. Although I've seen this scene play out before once in my life, so this isn't anything new. It's just terribly sad.

But despite the greath warmth right in front of me, my hands feel chillingly cold to the point of shaking.

Surely there must have been a line I shouldn't have crossed. Maybe there was another way, another route to take, that wouldn't end me up facing this warm and twisted fire. Maybe if I did things right, if I stuck to my morality, if I chose the harder path in exchange for innocence, then I wouldn't feel so violated by that melting bald head staring straight into my soul.

But what can I do, time waits for no one. Not even me. Well, not like it's going to get any worse. So for now, I hide my fear, coat it with cruel apathy.

"Hey... what do you think comes after death?"

"What does the sun goddess' teachings say?"

"If I remember... they said that the souls of those worthy enough for the sun goddess will be reincarnated to a new vessel."

"Reincarnation, huh? That isn't so bad at all. But if you lose all your memories from your previous life, then isn't that the same as permanently dying?"

"Really? I don't think only memories make the soul, at least not alone... wait, are you trying to dodge the question?"

"Hehehe, you caught on."

"Hihihi, that's 'cause I'm smart."

I don't know what to make of this situation. As for the ghost girl, what the hell could I make of her? I'm not stupid enough to lash out to her after what I saw. She's like a storm that suddenly appears out of nowhere. When it passes, nobody blames the storm, but whatever sent it — whether it be a powerful magician or the goddess herself — something with a will — but we don't definitely blame the stupid storm. Since the storm has no will on its own. Just like this girl.

At least, that's how I see it. She just stares at me. That grim, cold, uncaring stare.

"...Why do you look like a girl? Or maybe you're a girl with a manly voice?"

"This is a wig."

"Really? It looks too beautiful to be fake."

"Nope, you got it backwards. It looks beautiful because it's fake."

"But fake things can't be beautiful..."

"What are you talking about? Didn't you just compliment my wig before?"

"Hihi, I guess there are rare exceptions."

Tick, tock, tick, tock...

But the ghost girl isn't the only mystery.

I steal a glance at Liri's face, whose expression I can't quite pin down. How do you explain an expression that's both disturbed and disturbingly fine at the same time? I don't know, strange? It's like a face that isn't taking this too well and instead is rejecting reality... although I can't speak for myself.

Liri is, funnily enough, the most enigmatic piece of the puzzle for me, not the ghost girl with the soulless black eyes. As soon as I woke up from my sudden sleep, I caught her trying to kill herself as well with purplehead's bloodied knife. But I wasn't fooled. I knew In an instant that she has never touched that ghost girl— since her face wasn't that of enlightenment, but of incredible confusion.

What's going on through her mind right now? Who knows, I'm not going to pry. Not sticking my head into other's business is the greatest life lesson my dear friend Jina could ever teach me. It saved me a lot of unnecessary trouble ever since... until recently.

"...I hate being a dark elf."

"Hah? Where'd that come from?"

"What do you know about dark elves, Rose?"

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"Let's see... I'm sure I've read that during the last Demon Lord war, the dark elf tribes were the only non-demon race that allied themselves with the Demon Lord's army. That's all I remember."

"...Hihi, you really are a sheltered country bumpkin."

"Oy."

"But just as you said, my ancestors pledged their eternal allegiance to the Demon Lord back then, so even now our tribes normally shies away from human eyes, waiting for his eventual revival. That's why we're called a race of traitors. But I wanted to be different, you know. I wanted... to be like a human. Caring, compassionate, filled with love. I was jealous. That's why I tried my best. Against the wishes of my tribe, I joined human society, tried to be part of them — I even fought their wars with them. And just when I thought I finally knew what it meant to be human, after meeting Gaul, and Ron, and Damian, and Garmund, and having so much fun, happiness and love I could never experienced before... this happens. Reminding me that whatever I do, I'll never truly be human. That the blood running under my veins will always be tainted by this curse. It's too cruel. Too cruel..."

Her pointy ears droop.

"Hmm... really? Why are dark elves so different from humans?"

"That's— I don't want to say it."

"Okay then."

...

"... You're not going to sweet-talk me into answering?"

"What the hell? Why would I?"

"That's sad, kinda."

Tick, tock, tick, tock...

I've been sitting here for hours, reduced to doing small talk with Liri. I wonder when the boss of this floor will respawn? And there seems to be no adventurer party coming here, it seems. I think we've been here for quite a while, and I'm sick and tired of smelling this terrible smell, so I have to end this. My original goal still stands, and nothing will stop me. Not even this.

I stand up and begin packing my stuff, leaving Liri alone to stare at the fire.

Hmm, I should at least do a little gesture of respect for Gaul and his merry band.

I stand near the blazing flames. On my blackboard I write, [Until next time] with a drawing of that night we had so much fun. Sadly, the best I could do is this shaky drawing, but it's enough. I throw it into the flames in a crackle. I'd like to think that it would reach them one day, even if it sounds impossible. A man can dream. I really shouldn't let the smoke get into my eyes.

Now, what becomes of Liri? All of her friends are dead... No, she's free to do what she wants.

"Where are you going?"

Liri suddenly breaks the solemn silence. She's still on the ground, clutching her legs, but those entranced eyes that never once looked away from the fire now looks into mine. Where am I going? There's only one answer.

"Deeper. Until I find the person that I'm looking for."

"You're looking for someone? So you'll go, even if that person's waiting on the last floor? You can't do it alone."

"I'll still do it. It's not a matter of if. I don't have a choice anyways. This is my only path."

"Then take me with you."

I cough spastically from her words. What the hell? Her party all killed themselves and she wants to come with me deeper into the dungeon? What kind of thinking could be behind this? There is a lot of ways in dealing with this chaotic situation, but her decision is probably the worst. I wait for her next words before saying anything.

"Ah, you know, I— uh, want to finish this one final quest of our party. I think they'd like that too. And besides, there's no one waiting for me outside..."

Her elf ears droop once more, and she shows a depressed face like a puppy begging to be adopted. Heh? Sure, her extensive knowledge as an adventurer will probably be helpful in the long run, but I don't think it's right. I'm no monster to use her selfishly like that.

...But if what she said about dark elves are true, and nothing really is waiting for her outside, then isn't taking her under my wing the best course of action here? No. Of course not. I'm sure that if she tries hard enough, she might be able to find new friends that would take care of her as much as baldy and friends did.

The key word there is "if". I don't know anything about Liri, or the dark elves. I can't leave her like this. I'm... kind of worried about her, not as a friend, not even as an acquaintance, but as a... I don't even know. Obligation?

Obligation to what? To baldy? I don't care enough to have any obligations to him... right?

"Are you sure about following me? You have nothing to gain."

"I might gain a family."

... What the hell, that's unfair. That sad puppy-like look, and those words, are all it takes to make me finally give up.

"You're quite sly, you know that?"

"Hihi, thanks. So, can I go with you? Even only until the end of the quest. Please?"

"Well... since you said please, I'll make an exception this time. Make yourself useful."

"Heh, I'll probably be a lot more useful than you, you know?"

Ah, that cutesy smile I haven't seen in a while. Somehow, I'm dazed by it. It's a smile that reminds me of Ela, a smile I'd fight to protect... This dungeon is getting to me. If I was an elf, my pointy ears would be perky right now. Dark elves aren't so bad, huh?

Without any further delay, she packs her stuff as well. She throws a golden bangle on the flames, and does that short sun goddess prayer with her hands clasped together and eyes shut. And when she's done, she stands by me, side to side, and we put that solemn crackling of the flames behind us. There's nothing else to be said.

... Should I throw this wig to the fire as well? It's getting itchy. Nah, I'll keep it just to be safe.

This party of two moves forward.