Holtz walked closer while speaking to me, then stopped to stand in front of me. “Speaking of the long term battle ahead of you, there is still more you need to know about that new ability of yours. As an impromptu battle slave for the time being, I'm letting you know that the more you know & learn about how to control all that mana within yourself; means that you’ll have all the better odds to perform up to the peak elite standards that will be required of you to survive.”
Turning face to his side, Holts held his palm wide open and he held his hand outwards. I suddenly felt his mana condensing, so I quickly shifted to my second sight to see and feel the deep intricacies into what Holtz was about to describe to me.
Seeing the mana that matches the color of Holtzs’ Mana Mark began to swirl around their forearm & wrist, which actively tendril outwards from his palm in fibrous clumps. It looked like a hefty bundle of mana strands slathering out towards the surrounding atmosphere, kind of like a flower blossom if it's petals got clumped together by sap, or like a bundle of wet ropes tied together had popped their bindings and came to life in clumps that reached around.
I took a deep breath and actively settled my nerves to further calm myself down. Seeing such thing further enforced the fact that I was legitimately somewhere new, as if all the other things hadn't already convinced me yet, but it got more personal at this point and now I must seriously learn how to properly focus on my Mana Control……. 'Battle slave……. I have to stay calm if I am to face and survive someone else's will to kill….. So, if he did it like that, then….'
Upon recalling the feeling of sinking deeply into that sense of mana within myself from before, I began to notice further details through this new sensory awareness for the types, qualities, and characteristics that each and every mana element gave off. I could begin to pinpoint very accurately the intensity of quality, as well as an elemental Flavor… Aroma….. Essence all within a confined space….
As I attuned to these qualities and began to understand and comprehend this flowing field of living information, it was like a new sense of wellness opened up within my mind and spirit as I started to get used to this new sensory pattern recognition.
There’s a lot of information to unpack here and I’m getting a better hang at the feeling of this. I also realize again that I’ve stared into space rather intently from the detail I was beholding, so I blinked a few times, refocused on my own mana again and looked at Holtz as a whole being.
At the direct imprint point of his mana mark interacting with his personal spiritual mana I began to see a slight difference of mana colors being turbulent at the point of connection and in a very condensed state. Deep in my mind I likened it as boiling oil being smothered and sizzling between two ornate yet smoldering branding stamps interlocking at the points of connection. It… felt like he was forcing it though………
The sense was brief and fleeting but I was able to capture enough of his intention given to the mana for control purposes. Somehow I understood what he was doing as I watched, so now my turn. Focusing in my wrist, I was able to recreate the essence of the intention for my mana to begin a simple interaction between my spirit mana and the actual structural workings of the mana mark itself. 'If Holtz was able to brute force his way through this with such results….'
I defocus my sense of sight for a moment, to then hyper focus through my spirit & try to improve on my sense for mana instead. Remembering what Holtz just did, I concentrated mana into my wrist and gently ‘reached’ outwards to meet the deep purple mana glyph on the back of my wrist.
I could remember the feeling of intensity of Holtzs’ spirit boiling into his glyph within that simple instance. Like remembering an old scent, I had a sudden flashback of when I first forced my will and attitude upon my prayers in the old world.
That approach never gave me the peace I craved. It was only later on where I remember being taught; that 'surrendering' to the Spirit, removes the resistance I encountered internally from every time I faced my shadows and scars back then. The memories showed a stark contrast between experiencing the difference of not knowing what else to do vs. violently suppressing my darkest vexations.
Back then the struggle of wanting to be in control just to feel safe, was gradually beaten out of me the more I was pelted with rocks and beaten for calling out the truth. Honestly I was humbled by how durable and tenacious the body and mind really are when focused properly, despite the chaos taking place within or around me. I too had to learn to let go that I had been living old lies, and learned to gently sort out new ideas and new reactions while basking in the presence of Spirit. There seems to be a similar principle at action here. This world requires my self control to be at an even higher level now. And Baka'ru made this personal.
I took a long slow and deep breath to collect these senses, and remembered my prayers to overcome my old obstacles, and set myself to focus on myself as a whole, to quiet my mind and listen through my mana. This wasn’t a simple ‘passive’ attitude, but a much more complex acknowledgment of my state of being and my ability to recognize how & what it feels like & when to ‘let’ power flow out of me & in what directions and intensities.
In hindsight I can see it as simply allowing myself to work WITH Spirit. Before- I used to force my own will as if to absolutely control the power behind the prayer for myself. When I got to a broken enough point, where one day I didn’t know what else to do; I made a choice to let go of what it was 'supposed to be like'- I shrugged and simply gave attention to what needed to be done and put care into whatever I did for those moments from that point on. I just met the pain where it was. And I suddenly found that the answers suddenly showed up if I kept 'seeking/listening' in each moment. It challenged my every fiber at that time, but the willingness to let God's will be bigger, allowed me to see and live from a fresh start. I learned a lot about myself and about others this way too.
This made me reflect on the effect of the turbulence I noticed within his mana when displaying his skills. Holtz was by no means weak, but I could tell about Holtz; that even with all that polish and shine, he still had plenty of space of improvement and that finding peace would be one of the breakthrough markers for him as a person as well.
'Wait… why…. Why do I ‘know’ this…... No.. just… He could definitely benefit from some extra clarity if he would allow his tension to relax.'
I got even quieter, let my belly and lungs drop loose and 'listened' as I opened up my senses within my mana. I once spent some time with the elders, and trained my awareness just to meet with the atmosphere around me. I once learned to appreciate the feeling of the wind, sunlight, and water flowing along my skin. I once learned to feel warmth again when...…. Well, now that I’m here, I’ll revisit these steps now in this world to listen to what the mana had to say rather than brutally force this mana to do what I wanted….
I’m striving to sense for the differences in the spacing in-between the mana I could perceive vs. the objects and world around my mana. It felt wispy but vaguely fluid like. When I narrowed my focus to the extreme ends of my mana, I felt tiny vortices being the catalyst of the wispy sensation. It was these miniature tornado shapes that brushed between the mana and the mana mark. The hissing sound resonating like that of sizzling oil was the compression release of this border being squeezed through even tinier gaps I am beginning to sense in my own glyph while staying calm.
I was able to calmly meet my mana with the borders of the mana mark to feel their interaction, like a puddle slowly creeping along the cracks of some stones. I was able to glide and wisp mana motes around and began intertwining my spirit mana within the structures of the imprinted mana mark. At this depth of mana sense I can tell that there are even more ways to refine this sense and thus get an even deeper control over this essence…
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I can estimate that the more I practice with and learn to acclimate to these patterns of energy, that I’ll be able to better utilize this power and get an even clearer understanding of my manas’ interaction within the actual glyph in and of itself….
In fact…. There’s a suction feeling taking place from the glyph itself as if it’s hungry….. It is taking in essence from my mana, simply by being near me. I could now clearly feel a slight but distinct absorption pulling from inside the glyph, trying to seemingly feed on me like a parasite.
As for the structure of the mark itself, I can sense that the glyph was porous and semi hollow in design, but even deeper it had hidden functions buried further within. Can’t tell what any would be quite yet, but I have a sense that it’ll give me a better edge at survival in this place if I can utilize my mana to help me defend myself and build all of my foundations as a labor/battle slave as firmly as I can….. Hehe…. It’s like I have special powers like the angels and old heroes, but in this world though……
At the least I now knew that I could start to ‘explore’ within this glyph structure more, and additionally learned that the more I explored this new faculty of mine, the better off I would be in this world…..
Well let us figure this out, I suppose… I closed my eyes and focused within, and immediately got a zap between my eyebrows, knocking my head back a little. I noticed Holtz retracting his mana from flicking me between the eyes… I blinked widely as I processed new boundaries and common sense being broken and remolded in real time…. I felt…... Literal….. Impact….. Mana, can materialize….. My mind creaks open doors of possibilities sensing the wide range of applications for this miraculous substance that emits life essence.
It is very good to know that method is a thing….. But then as I see Holtz’s eyes calling for my attention, it reminds me of the various beasts rushing around, and I understand to split my focus the best I can to pay attention to all of this wild sensory awareness taking place collectively. I have to think from this alert perspective as often as possible from now on…. I have to stay alert to my surroundings more often…... I need to gain better insight now while I have Holtz with me… This way I can be ready for my solo runs to be safe and prepared for anything better out here in these fields….
Reshaping my alertness to listen and feel for the mana and sounds taking place around me, I stay relaxed and ready to strike like a lion holding position and awaiting to pounce on prey, just in case. Also focusing inward I develop deeper awareness of my mana from that calm inner mana world perspective looking outward.
As if I was imagining the circumstance from within the glyph itself, I actually perceived this space from an internal mana perspective. It was as if I gained a second layered visual perspective and I was ‘seeing’ as a spirit mote body, floating around in a kind of day dream. Within 2nd sight, my consciousness expanded as I recognized that I was now watching spirit motes of the birds floating through the space of the sky. I even could sense movement from some kind of crawling bugs that had been digging while underneath the surface area as well. It was beautiful to experience the movement and vitality of all of these creatures swirling around us, as I check back in from being immersed in the natural mana essence of everything the environment itself consisted of. This may be Holtz’s native world, but for me….. This is truly surreal and wonderful….. And I like it.
[ +1 Mana Control ]
I, as the spirit motes, slowly wafted up to and embraced the curves and edges and tunnels of the glyph like I was walking up to a complex building with many halls and pathways. As I made tangible contact with the mana mark I focused on the sensual awareness of my mana interacting with the space of the mana glyph around it. Gliding my ‘hands’ along the surface, I noticed a granular resistance like a caked on coating that should later be removed. It left me feeling kinda gross like I licked a salty caked on and oily residue from a plate that didn’t get washed clean yet. I think I twinged for a second from slight recoil…… blehk…… This curse is the most disgusting part about this...
As my spirit mote consciousness delves deeper within these dark purple glyph pathways, I’m concentrating and trying to feel through the passages to explore it’s dimensions as well as hoping to find a path to create a stream of mana to flow through this to start ‘washing’ away this filthiness from within.
I was learning more at a rapid pace, and continuously saw [+1 Mana Control]’s accumulating. As I felt my way around internally from within the Mana Glyph, I was also paying attention externally as the birds, boars and insects course around the area and collectively ebb ever closer around us. While I’m concentrating on clearing a mana pathway real quick, a stream of mana motes made connection with a miniature mana crystal node hidden along a collection point of a few pathways, I made connection and somehow felt like I could now ‘reach’ with mana, and promptly did so as if I felt an instinctual urge to ‘yawn’, expressing itself through this sense of touch. I suddenly sensed a burst of my mana translate into the node, which made purple mana tendrils breach through and slither out from the surface of my palm.
By this point I opened my palm to face up as a small burst of purple tendrils extended forth from my palm, but only slightly…. I’m suddenly dumbstruck as if I’d been missing out all along, and I instantly know what this feeling literally reminds me of! The pieces were right there all along, and for all intents and purposes, this act is way less gross here. But by way of intention- this mana stuff is also so much more complex than just a simple sensory organ. No wonder all of the mana seemed vaguely aromatic and appealing to my appetite.
[Mana Glyph: Mana Touch Activated]
Holtz’ is staring intently at my quiet personage sensing the various activities taking place through my mana, and feeling the fluctuations taking place between my wrist and the mana glyph but just barely. He was expecting a more aggressive approach such as his own, expecting Densu to fill the glyph with power as soon as he figured it out. Despite this slight surprise as for never taking this more calm approach to the mana before for himself, he put that thought in the back of his mind for later.
Holtz could tell I was sensing all around us too for a decent amount of distance, acknowledging that I was indeed taking heed to his last warning about staying alert to the environment around himself…. 'This much is okay for around these gates, but this can be worked on in time…. Wait a minute, I didn’t tell him how……. Aahhhh, it’s like this….'
He smirked, noticing that he didn’t get to explain the usual process to me yet but only just showed me his ability first then and flicked my forehead to catch my attention just a moment ago. About to speak up to me, I had suddenly stuck my tongue out at my palm real quick like a joke, and simultaneously a purple burst of mana fibers waved in an outward spiral out from within my palm and back upwards towards my face. I immediately felt both sides of this and squinted hard and held back intense laughter. I suddenly heard Holtzs’ voice again, so I lightly bit my ‘tongues’ and deeply pushed a slow breath out to calm myself down again, as I looked back towards him.
As if seeing this mana touch tendril reach out from my palm suddenly like a teasing joke, had interrupted his train of thought- he still spoke through the surprise, to further inform me of my current state of being. “Keep paying more attention to what is going on around you now that you’re out here. I say this because of how much effort I need to stay alert for when I have to think so deeply mid battle, and to do so swiftly, all while formulating and executing a real time battle strategy on the run. During the waves of war if you’re caught unaware, it is easy to become overwhelmed and wind up as a rich source of spirit mana food to any of the lucky enough creatures to consume your essence.”
Seeing that I was alert to his warnings he continued to encourage me. “At some point the information intake and your reaction time will begin to smooth out and you’ll soon adapt to getting quicker at reacting to real time battle. As these mana senses begin to feel more natural, you’ll sense a sharp development in how you personally relate to mana of all sorts.
Everyone develops their own unique sensitivities and preferences in life. This much is the same for everyone's development of Mana control. Although it’s sad that some people simply aren’t designed to process large extents of mana flow. Forcing an influx purposefully onto someone who isn’t developed can cause severe spirit damage…. Someone who is too damaged can even be annihilated.”
For a brief moment I felt a horrific killing intent directly matched up with the surface of my entire mana body, as Holtz glared piercingly through my soul like I was glass, “We don’t do that here. Willful Annihilation is a capitol offense here in Indossus….”.
The awful pressure eased up off my being, and allowed for clarity to return to my surroundings. This gap between strength in this world is on a completely different level than what I’m used to. Or maybe I never understood true strength to begin with.
Holtz continued after feeling like he proved his point, “Anyone found having intent of maliciously hurting the very essence of a person within our territory will be treated as an actor of war against all of the people, and the Celestials do not take kindly to the evils that lurk within this land and hurt it’s inhabitants to the point of annihilation…....”
The resonance of the hooves of the wild boars running around could start to be felt with more frequent consistency and heavier intensity, as if the flash of extreme killing intent had triggered the whole lot of them at once.