Storing Coffee and the freshly paralyzed humanoid mimic in my body, I stepped out the middle of the mining operation. I glanced around, quickly assessing that no one found me strange immediately. Balancing my body with two extra people inside proved to be a challenge, but my stagger helped me blend in better with the other exhausted workers. I looked around for someone to talk to.

“Oi, Jerr-boi, I’ve been lookin’ everywhere for you! When’d you shift back to box form? I thought you were saving it for your date later with that hottie from uptown.” A hipster male voice called out from my left. A burly mimic covered in grime and scratches was waving his arm while strolling towards me. I had the feeling that he was smiling, although it was impossible to confirm this just by studying his physical expression.

‘An acquaintance of our hostage, probably,’ Coffee commented.

‘Yeah. Like I thought, his mana core will help us identify as him even if we don’t look the same.’

As the mimic got closer, his eyes seemed to affix themselves more closely on the various parts of my body.

“Sup with the shitty form, dude? You okay?” He asked. Oh, crap. My mind raced as I tried to come up with an excuse.

“Shhh, I didn’t have time for a full transformation,” I whispered furiously, pretending to give him a panicked look. “We need to get the fuck outta here.”

“Dawg, what happened?” The mimic looked worried now.

“You know Frank, Tony, and Claire?”

“Yeaaaaaah, aren’t those the shitheads you mentioned yesterday? The ones who keep taking breaks to go take a piss or whatev the hell they’re actually doing?”

‘This might be easier than I thought,’ Coffee said.

‘Stop that. Thoughts like those are death flags,’ I shot back.

‘Death flag?’

‘Like, a jinx.’

“I... I overheard them talk about setting explosives around here... This place is gonna blow any moment!” I confided with a fearful expression.

…

He stared at me for a good ten seconds.

“Hahaha good one, Jerry. I almost believed you for a sec!” He laughed and slapped me on the back. I say laugh, but it was more like he was wagging his three tongues while arching himself backwards. A guttural sound resounded from deep within his chesty body.

‘Don’t comment. Just give him a stern look,’ Coffee instructed.

I did, and the mimic’s laugh slowly trailed off and was replaced by silence.

“You’re serious,” he said. “Explosion. Here? I mean, those three are assholes, but explosions?"

"They mentioned something about accident insurance," I explained. Realization dawned on his face.

"For the love of all boxes, what do we do?!”

“Shh! We have to evacuate everyone immediately, but don’t talk mention those three. Just tell them that we’re in danger. I’m only telling you because I trust you, man. We have less than half an hour. Gather everyone you can and get out of here.”

“What about you, Jerry? I’m not going anywhere without you, buddy.”

‘Another heroic type, huh,’ Coffee said. I could pretty much see her rolling her eyes.

‘Jerry just has a good friend.’

“I’ll get out too. Round up everyone and leave first. I’ll stay behind to help stragglers, and meet you at the top,” I lied, planning to escape via a different route.

“Aight.”

He made a fist with his hand, and I bumped it, upon which he folded his legs into wheels and zoomed off towards a large crowd of mimics, who appeared to be taking a break. Seconds after he joined them, they began discussing frantically among themselves, and looked a little panicked. I affirmed that our role was over.

Making sure that he wasn’t paying attention to me, I moved towards the hidden passageway, which had been mentioned to be in the tunnel eight entrances to the right of the one we were in.

‘What the hell was that?’ Coffee asked.

‘What was what?’

‘You fisted him.’

‘I wha—oh, that was a fist bump. It’s what men do sometimes to look, uh… cool,’ I commented, making my way towards the hidden passageway that we heard about. They said that it was in the tunnel eight entrances to our right.

‘So it’s some kind of secret male code? How do you know about it?’

‘Cause I’m a male, duh,’ I replied on reflex.

…

Oh, that’s right. Fuck me. There I go, opening a can of worms again.

‘WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!’ Coffee screamed and kicked me from inside. Hard.

‘OW! No, stop. Stop. STOP! That hurts!’

‘You think you’re going to get off easy just like that? I was b-barely wearing… Is that why y-you saved m-me? You pedophile! Hentai! Let me out! Sexual harassment!’

‘We can talk about this later! Don’t you remember the situation we’re in? Ow! C’mon, help me look for that exit. They said that it was somewhere here,’ I said, groaning in pain but lifting my lid a crack so that Coffee could peek through. We were now in a narrow tunnel like the one we were teleported to initially. This one was also demarcated with a 'X'-marked sign out front.

‘Fine. You’re gonna pay later…’ she grumbled.

‘Uhmmm. How’s Jerry doing?’ I changed the subject as we started scouring the walls for a hidden passage.

‘He’ll be out for a while since I just gave him another administration. I had to change the type of toxin though, because he was synthesizing a counter-toxin for the one I was using before. Can you go back a step or two? I think I saw something poking out,’ Coffee said, igniting a small flame to provide better lighting. We had ventured far enough from the main area to avoid detection.

‘Do you think he’s going to get crap later for snitching on those three? Oh yeah, this looks weird. It’s like three black penises sticking out of the wall in an upside down triangle,’ I grabbed the one on the right and tried to move it.

‘Probably, but he knows about us anyway, so he’ll be fine. I know you’re just checking those out, but could you do it any less… strokingly? I knew it; you are a pervert.’

If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

‘Your mind’s in one hell of a gutter. Have you had your eyes checked recently? Also, is that what you think of all men you come across?’

‘Only the ones who pretend to be a girl to an innocent maiden like me,’ Coffee snapped. That statement pierced through my core and made me miss a step.

‘I was going to correct you at some point. I just didn’t get the chance to—’

‘Riiight. That’s what they all say.’

‘Who the hell is this ‘they’?’ I grunted, trying to pull on the lowest protrusion.

Click. Gurrrrrrrrrrg.

The stone wall behind us shifted aside, revealing a crudely made staircase.

‘Oh, there was that method too,’ Coffee slapped her forehead.

‘Hmm?’

‘We could’ve dug our way upwards.’

‘How?’

‘Steal a pickaxe and dig our way up, obviously. Magic, you dolt. Haven’t you heard of Earth magic? It uses a specific combination of Collision and Flux mana.’

‘Uh… not really. But if Earth magic exists, then why are they mining using physical force?’

‘Not everyone can use spells advanced enough to excavate an entire floor’s length of Strecicelium rock. Wouldn’t have been a problem for the two of us, though. I can compensate for my lack of mana with control, and… somehow, you’re able to learn things that usually take weeks for even talented magicians; not to mention your matured core too.’ She sounded bitter. ‘We’re going to have a long talk afterwards and you’re going to tell me exactly what kind of training you did.’

‘Okay, okay. Let’s head back to check on the others,’ I said, closing the hidden passageway by pushing the penis-lever back in.

‘We have less than 15 minutes. Make it quick, and then let’s get the hell out of here,’ Coffee said, extinguishing her flame.

‘Okay.’

----------------------------------------

When we were close to the tunnel exit, we confirmed that the workers were being transported to safety using the central elevator. Jerry's friend seemed to be leading the process efficiently by dividing the remaining mimics into groups of five.

'Something's wrong,' Coffee said.

'What do you mean? Everyone's going to be okay, and we can dump ol' Jerr-boi off wherever once we are out of here.'

'Look at those three who are staring at the leader guy.'

'Where?'

'They're in the group closest to us.'

Now that Coffee mentioned it, there were three mimics acting strangely. It was hard to describe what they looked like, being so far from them. One was tall and lankey, another was short and obese, and the last was pretty average, save for the green tattoo of some animal on her back. Unlike the others who were watching the elevator go up and down, they were entirely focused on Jerry's friend. He, on the other hand, was avoiding looking at them to the point that it was obvious that he was doing it on purpose.

'Do you think...?'

'Those are most likely Frank, Tony, and Angela,' Coffee confirmed

'Ah shit... and they're in the last group to leave. If they think that it was him who ruined their plans, he's going to be in trouble once he's alone with them.'

'He wouldn't be stupid enough to wait until the last group...' 

'Not unless he was waiting for his friend,' I said, smacking myself in the face.

'Hmm, remind you of how someone felt when you were being super idealistic earlier?'

'Hey, that was different.'

'Anyway, let's just go. We really can't do anything this time,' Coffee poked me from inside.

I hated to admit it, but she was right. Actually, I was thinking the same thing. We had precious little time left, I had my hands full with transportation, and it wasn't for certain that Jerry's friend was in danger. It was enough to know that evacuation was underway.

We turned around and returned to the three penis-levers, opening the hidden passageway and climbing up the stairs.

'That was surprisingly rational of you,' Coffee murmured from inside.

'You know what's irrational? The fact that I'm the only one doing the heavy-lifting here,' I said, spitting Coffee out. Before I could spit the paralyzed mimic out, she raised both arms in a defensive stance.

'I'm a powerless little girl. What kind of a man are you to try and make me carrying a disgusting mimic up a flight of stairs?'

'Oh please, the jig is already up that you're older than I am.' I readied myself to spit the mimic right at her.

'Wait, wait! I'll forgive you for tricking me into thinking you were a girl for the past 24 hours. I swear the event will be forgotten and never mentioned again.'

'...Sigh... Fine,' I begrudgingly kept my mouth shut. 'And as for what you were saying, it's like I said. I'm not some sort of martyr. I just want to do what's right if I can, you know? In the future, I'd appreciate it if you consulted me about your plans first.'

'Nyeh~' Coffee stuck her tongue out at me, crossed her arms and faced away. I resisted the temptation to spit the paralyzed mimic at her (who was currently thinking: 'Am I some kind of ball to you monsters?!').

We continued to climb the stairs one step at a time. It went quite the ways up, but that was unsurprising given how high the elevator rose. Eventually, we finally reached the end, where there was an upright formation of the penis triangle. On Coffee's snickering bequest, I pulled the top protrusion.

Click. Gurrrrrrrrrrg.

Light flooded in like we were being reborn into the world. It took a while for our eyes to adjust, but when they did, my chesty mouth hung open a full 180 degrees. We were standing at the edge of a flat mountain range looking down on a rocky landscape littered with countless sparkling spires of bright green-blue stalagmites. The entire ceiling was an aurora borealis, an ever-flowing river of almost mystical energies.

Far beyond, we saw a great city built atop top plateau of a small mountain. But unlike the cities seen in fantasy movies or animes, the entire city architecture, at least from where we were standing, appeared to be giant boxes. At the centre of the city was a tall skyscraper, taller than the next tallest building by about three times, that was made of complete gold. At its top was a giant eye, which radiated a bright yellowy-orange glow on the surrounding area.

Thankfully, it was unmoving and seemed to be a mere sculpture, unlike another eye that I knew of from my world's popular literature.

BOOM!

The mountain we were on shook violently, and both of us stumbled at the same time. The explosives must have gone off. I closed my mouth and retracted my legs, causing my chesty body to lie flat. 

Thud.

'Kyaaa!' Coffee screamed, holding onto my arm tightly. There was nothing for me to grab onto. Nothing to stop us from falling if the ground beneath us crumbled. The tremors continued for several seconds, and then stopped abruptly.

However, our relief was short-lived. To our horror, the giant eye on the city skyscraper swiveled and looked directly at us. A cold sweat ran down my spine.

'Coffee, what is that?' I asked in a voice much too tranquil for the situation.

'How the fuck are you staying calm?! I don't know! I don't fucking know! Is it looking at us?!' Coffee screamed telepathically.

'Ugh, my head... if I'm correct, you two are referring to the Great Eye?' An unmistakeably female voice said from inside me. Coffee reflexively tore a piece of flesh from her finger and created a ruby-red blade using her blood. My mind went into a flurry, as did my arms and tongues on instinct. What a weird body. 

'Uhnn~ Don't stop~ WAIT NO. Stop it! I mean don't stop... Uhn~' the voice moaned.

Coffee gave me a look of revulsion, but motioned me to spit the mimic out. I gladly did so, and the no-longer-paralyzed mimic flew out, covered in saliva and panting with a sensual expression.

'Awww, it was just getting to the good part...' she complained. Coffee put her blade under the mimic's chin with a dark look on her face. 'Wait, don't paralyze me again! I'm not your enemy!'

'Who are you?' Coffee demanded.

'I thought your name was Jerry?' I asked. I turned to Coffee and whispered, 'Is Jerry a girl's name?!'

'Ahem,' the mimic lightly coughed into her fist. 'Jerry is the alias I used to infiltrate the Joviacht Mining Corp. to investigate possible terrorist activities. Please let me reintroduce myself.

'My name is Elizabeth von Morningwood, junior officer of the Mimic Social Guardians, or the MSG. You can call me Liz.'

'Coffee, use your neurotoxin. She's part of the mimic popo,' I said.

'Gladly,' Coffee smiled.

'Let me finish! I'm interested in you two, and I want to help you out,' she begged.

'Why?' Coffee asked suspiciously.

'I've been watching you both for the past hour, and I feel like you will be amazing material for the novel I'm writing. Neither of you seem that dangerous. As an MSG officer, I should take you in for interrogation, but I hate my job anyways,' she said nonchalantly.

'Sounds like bullshit. Why should we trust you?' I eyed her critically.

'Because you don't have a choice. There's no chance in hell that you'll get out of here by yourselves. This is the heart of the Mimic Kingdom,' she replied. 'As soon as you make it down this mountain, there will be investigators everywhere looking for me.'

If that was true...

Coffee and I looked at each other, both of us conflicted as to what to do.

'Might as well squeeze information out of her to begin with,' I suggested, directing my thoughts so that only Coffee would hear.

'Good idea. Ask about that freaky eye,' Coffee agreed.

'You have to answer our questions first,' I told Liz, who nodded excitedly.

'First of all, what's that thing you referred to as the Great Eye?'

'Oh, that thing? It's a sex compass,' she said.

...

'What?'

'It shines upon the most recent area of intercourse. It must've thought that the explosion in the mountain was a giant ejaculation.'

...