I regret ever complaining about the seas or the weather, because I obviously had no clue just how bad things could get. What waves we’d gotten on our journey thus far were like small peasant huts compared to a noble’s villa. The wooden sails creaked in pain as the ship was tossed to and fro like the handaxe of some showoff at a village festival. Between the high waves, the intense winds, and the strikes of lightning, I genuinely feared for our safety, even with the more experienced members of our crew taking the lead in trying to maneuver the ship towards what we thought to be the edge of the storm. Everyone, and I mean everyone, was out on deck trying to keep the ship together.

What I had failed to expect was how little control I’d have of myself should I end up in the sea during this storm. Let me explain.

As usual, Arzias was clambering up and down the mast, swinging throughout the rigging, trying to keep the sails from buckling and tearing under the intense pressure from the titanic winds and sharp, pelting rain. Honestly, the acrobatics she put on display, including swinging, flipping, ziplining, and even hanging by her tail was astounding. However, disaster struck—literally in this case—as a stray bolt of lightning blasted the mast, which exploded into smoke, splinters, and flames, as Arzias hung helplessly to the sail, which was now plummeting into the ocean. She quickly slid down to a more solid part of the mast and kicked off, leaping towards the ship, but unfortunately her jump came up just short as she dropped into the ocean. What’s worse, at the time I didn’t think anybody but me saw this happen, so as fast as I could, I tied a rope around my waist and to the railing of the deck and dove into the ocean to save her.

This was…not one of my best plans.

You see, I’m not exactly a strong swimmer, and I definitely wasn’t then. I don’t exactly float well, even when I’m not being tossed about by the waves. Also I hadn’t quite gotten used to opening my eyes underwater, so I couldn’t even see what I was doing. Couple that with the fact that I’d essentially turned myself into a rather inept anchor for the ship, and before I knew it, I felt myself sinking into a deep, quiet darkness, with my last thought being something along the lines of berating myself for being so impulsive.

—

Some time later, I felt my senses returning to me. First my sense of touch, as I was cold, sopping wet, lying on…sand? Just out of reach I could sense a faint warmth. A fire. Yes. I could smell the smoke. I could hear the crackling of the wood as the flames danced on top of it. There was even a mild scent of something cooking. Fish, maybe? I slowly opened my eyes, finding myself staring up at the calm night sky. I stiffly rolled over into the direction of the heat and crackling.

As I was taking all this in, I finally heard a hissing voice pipe up behind me. “Good, you finally awake!”

I spun in the direction of the voice, so much so that in my disorientation I found myself tumbling face down into the sand again. I pushed myself up to see Arzias, smiling that big, toothy grin of hers as she watched the fire. Specifically, fish she had skewered next to the fire, slowly roasting in its blessed warmth.

“Where are we?” I asked, before I noticed the absence of anybody else. “What happened?”

“You fall into sea and…um…not die but go to sleep.” Arzias clearly fumbled with the words. “You tied to ship but rope broke. Me already in sea, so me try to help, but couldn’t catch ship. Me recognize the…ummm…underwater river, and we ride to Arzias island.”

My head swam as I was trying to piece together Arzias’ broken language. If I was understanding her properly, we had used the ocean’s currents to somehow float our way to the Isle of Rampage. Not only that, but without the ship, or even somehow ahead of it. Had they gotten lost in the storm?

To say nothing of the fact that we were here days ahead of schedule. I mean, I know Arzias literally said she used the current to swim to the island, but still, how did she manage that out to see, carrying me, without either of us drowning? Or maybe we were closer than I’d realized, but we just hadn’t seen it from the sea?

I shook my head. Too much to process at the moment.

“Where’s everyone else?” I asked.

“Don’t know. Hopefully ship find safe place to stop somewhere else on island, but island is big. Didn’t want to just leave you alone for other lizardfolk to eat.

I shuddered at that thought. Left alone on the beach in soaked clothes only to be devoured alive by a bunch of people who were looking for a quick and easy meal.

I also found myself shivering as I realized that, indeed, I was still in my soaked clothes, so not enough time had passed for them to dry. But this raised a new concern. I had no spare clothing, and if I stayed in my wet clothes, I was probably going to get sick. A concern that Arzias didn’t seem to share.

I frantically searched for a solution. As appealing as being stark naked in the middle of nowhere on some island was (as in, it wasn’t, really), I would much rather have a room to myself to wait while things dried. As in, not out in the elements, in full view of whatever animals or people would be passing by. At best, we’d run into the ship’s crew and it would make things awkward for the next little while. At worst, well…I hadn’t wanted to consider the worst.

“Aren’t you still cold? My clothes are still wet, so I bet yours are too.”

“No, they fine,” Arzias responded. “I no need clothes so I was naked for while, but you need clothes, right?”

“Well, that’s true, but if I stay in wet clothes for a long time, I could actually contract something like pneumonia.”

“You…what?”

I scowled. Of course. I’d forgotten who I was talking to.

“I might get sick. Really sick. Are we close to your village?”

“No, if we walk, a day, maybe.”

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Rats. If I had to wait a day I’d definitely get sick. Couldn’t rely on my clothes drying off as we traveled, especially since, even now, this late at night, it was quite muggy. This place was even more humid than other coastal areas we’d traveled through up to this point, which would make sense if we were closer to the equator.

I sighed. I was afraid of this.

“Can we set up a shelter?” I asked, before having to clarify when Arzias tilted her head in confusion. “A tent, a small house, or something.”

“Maybe, if use tree leaves or something. Why?”

“Because I might have to get naked. And I want some privacy.”

“Oh, because you shy? Me know what mammal people look like when naked.”

“What? No! Because I want to be safe! I don’t have scales like you do, so if bugs or other animals show up, I’m less protected!” Also yes, I wasn’t exactly in a hurry to strip in front of someone I barely knew. Even if that had already happened to me with the heroes.

I then caught myself wondering what my kids would look like. Kids I had with Marsden.

Feeling myself blush at the thought, I forced myself back to the present, back to reality. Right. I wanted privacy to be safe from animals or whatever.

I opened my mouth to vocalize this thought, when Arzias said, “Maybe use tree leaves or something.”

“Won’t we need a lot for a shelter?”

“Oh no, not for house. For clothes. Just until your clothes dry.”

So there I was. My soaked clothes hanging over the fire as I sat, sensitive bits covered by leaves, my anxieties barely addressed, but still, something was better than nothing. And at least I had some fish to address the hunger pains I was beginning to have. Hopefully between the wet clothes and who knows what sorts of leaves Arzias found for me, I wouldn’t end up with some weird rash or bug bites.

Eventually, as I sat there in awkward silence, unsure of what to try to talk about with Arzias and pondering my current situation, I felt myself dozing off. Before I knew it I found myself on a dreamlike tropical island not unlike the one I was on in the waking world, although things were a great deal more…dreamy. I’ll spare you the details, but basically I was on a honeymoon with a certain Heroic individual who shall remain nameless. To this day I’m not quite sure why I was so enraptured by the man when I had barely spoken to him, but I just chalk it up to youth and raging hormones. I mean, in my defense, he was very easy on the eyes. Plus, I mean, he saved my life when he had no idea who I even was. I don’t think I need to explain why I find that attractive.

I say that, but even while writing that sentence I thought of the implication that I would find Arzias attractive, which isn’t really true. I’m sure it would be if she looked…well…humanoid. I haven’t done the best job of explaining what lizardfolk look like for those who might be unfamiliar with the species, which I suppose is my mistake, but they look less like reptilian humans and more like bipedal crocodiles. Except when they choose to be quadrupedal, even though their arms are…well…arms, and not crocodilian forelegs.

And no, before you ask, they don’t resemble those weird drawings that people made that are essentially just red or green human women with tails. You know know who you are, and you’re weird.

Sorry about that, speaking of weird, there I go on my weird tangents when I should be telling the story. I awoke a few hours later as the sun was rising. Our fire had long since gone out, and Arzias had burrowed into the sand, bedding down for her own sleep. Apparently burrowing into the sand allowed her to sleep while also listening, or rather feeling, for anything that could be moving towards us.

A handy skill to have, which only somewhat made up for the long stretches of awkward silence we were unsure of how to fill. It can be kind of troublesome when you only have a small amount of one language in common. Plus, I wasn’t sure what we could even talk about if there wasn’t any language barrier at all. What sorts of hobbies would she have? Would she even have hobbies? We already knew what her favorite food was. The answer was anything she could get her hands on. The fresher, the better. What about music? Books? I wasn’t sure how to even approach the subject.

Just thinking about it gave me the mother of all headaches, so I decided I’d just wait until Arzias woke up and try to scope out some food. I checked my clothes. Still somewhat damp. Probably would be best to just let them hang and air dry for a little longer. I would probably be fine, though looking through my things again, I spent another few seconds mentally scolding myself for diving overboard without any equipment. Even the dagger that Dad gave me would be better than the nothing I was currently armed with. Whatever, I could manage. The only problem being…where would I even start? I decided to try fishing, and sure enough, I saw quite a few crabs scuttling about the shore. I’d never cooked crabs up to that point, but I figured that it couldn’t have been that hard. We’d just have to build another fire.

I also needed something I could use to catch them. A stick or something like that. There was no way I was going to try to catch a bunch of crabs barehanded. I didn’t know how much it would hurt to get pinched by those claws, and I certainly didn’t want to find out. Those sharp sticks that Arzias used to skewer the fish she had caught might work, though I wasn’t sure if I could actually pierce the crabs’ carapace with it. No, I needed something heavier.

I quickly scanned the beach for any driftwood or large rocks or, gods willing, a box that had washed ashore from any ships that had the misfortune of running aground here. As luck would have it, a short walk away from our campsite, I did find a wrecked ship, in relatively decent condition. I mean, sure, she wasn’t seaworthy by any stretch of the imagination. And when I say ship, I mean…well…half of a ship. Specifically the mast and the bow of the ship, its sails torn to shreds from years of weathering. That or they were looted by others on the island. Maybe this was the ship that brought the orcs here? At the time I couldn’t be particularly sure, since any markings on the ship had faded with the passage of time, and I probably wouldn’t have recognized them even if they hadn’t. Though from the sound of things, the orcs weren’t exactly native to that island. I say from the sound of things because…well…we’ll get to that.

Anyway, I climbed about the wreckage trying to find something that might be of use. Most of the wood was too rotten to use as a very serious weapon. Heck, even the sail was too tattered to use as a decent set of clothing, or even as a very skimpy, just as uncomfortable set of underclothes. Just my luck.

I lowered myself into the “hold” of this half-ship, letting myself drop onto the sand. As my eyes adjusted to the lower light, I noticed a small chest. Treasure that previous looters hadn’t gotten their hands on? Maybe today was my lucky day. Unfortunately, the chest was locked. Drat.

But then, I remembered that I’d been practicing lockpicking on a similar chest. The locking mechanism couldn’t have been that different, nor could it be that much more complex. The only issue was the fact that I didn’t have my pins. I just had the small skirt of sticks and leaves that Arzias made for me. Maybe I could just remove a couple twigs from it and try my luck.

This made the skirt a little looser on me, but it would only be for a bit. I spent a few minutes jiggling the pins in the lock before I finally heard the telltale click that let me know that it had sprung open. I quickly opened the box to find, to my dismay, a small, rusted pendant. Great. Maybe I could sell the gem inside once I got off the island. If that day ever came.

Fortunately I wasn’t left to wallow in my disappointment for very long, because after I tossed the box aside, I felt the ground beneath me begin to shake. Oh no. The volcano wasn’t going to erupt, was it?

Well, no, actually, as on the other side of the hold, an enormous crab slowly dug its way out of a burrow in the sand. And I mean this sucker was huge. At least five or six times my size.

And it was cranky.