I was shocked.
He continued, “This morning I talked to the building manager. Asked if there were any vacancies. He told me the apartment three doors down’ll be vacant in a few weeks. The owner of the condo got relocated and asked him to put an ad up. I was thinkin’ I’d rent it for you.
Get you in your own place and keeping it here would make it so they wouldn’t know you weren’t living with me. I thought it’d be a good way to get some distance, carefully.”
My expression must’ve dropped. He gave me a squeeze, “I told him I’d let him know. I didn’t do it on the spot, probably ‘cuz I didn’t know if I could let you go. After having you last night, call me a dog, but I wanted you again. Saw you when I got home and was gonna ask you what you wanted. Then the way you looked at me? f**k, the way you look at me, Angel…
All day I wanted to k**s you, be inside you. Watching you shop, seeing you smile, it got to me. And you taking the pet name I gave you as your new name? s**t, baby.
After getting a taste of you I couldn’t stop myself. And now after having you again? You talking to me like that and begging me to spank you, asking me for permission to touch yourself? Thanking me for making you come, for letting you make yourself come? f**k, baby. This was even better than last night and last night was f**k-hot.”
“It was amazing,” I agreed, goosebumps all over me, warmth in my chest like I hadn’t felt in years, maybe even ever.
“What do you want?”
“This,” I answered.
“You’ve got this hero worship thing happenin’ and I am a fuckin’ dog for letting it get carried away. I wanna say I really wanted to not go here with you but it’s only been a few days. Clearly I didn’t try that hard.
But the way you look at me, the way you are when we f**k, it’s too much.”
I kissed his chin and snuggled in. I couldn’t believe I felt so bold to do that. But I did. And it felt awesome to just snuggle in close to him like that.
He put an arm tight around me, “I dunno, babe. I just don’t want if this thing with us goes somewhere and for you, as your life gets normal again, to suddenly realize you don’t want this.”
“I won’t,” I whispered.
“How do you know that?”
I didn’t have an answer for him. I just couldn’t imagine not wanting him.
He continued, “Because once I’ve decided you’re mine I won’t be willing to let you go unless you do something to shred my heart. Maybe I should give you space, let you figure out what you want before we take this any further.”
“Maybe you should,” I said softly.
He raised his eyebrows for a second and then moistened his lips and nodded.
“But please don’t,” I said.
He shook his head and sighed but he looked relieved, I think.
“What do you want outta life?” he asked me.
I shrugged, “It has been a long time since I let myself think about that. All I’ve thought about for so many months, is this. Getting sold so I could get out of there. That’s what I did, Drake.
I worked hard to make them trust me so I could be sold. I didn’t play them, please don’t think I’m playing you. I didn’t play anyone, I just tried really hard to be good enough. And I’d never ever shred your heart. Never ever.”
He shook his head and was quiet a minute, studying me, before saying “So what if you and I carry on and suddenly you realize what you want isn’t this?”
“I don’t think that’ll happen,” I said and my heart wanted to leap with joy because it sounded like he did want this, want me.
“Because you thought you’d have nothing better,” he said, “Because you thought this was the best scenario you could get, getting sold. But I don’t wanna be someone’s best case scenario.
I want a woman who worships the ground I walk on. I want a woman who lets me do the same for her and who appreciates that I worship her. I want a woman who wants what I want outta life.”
“You deserve nothing less.” God, he was amazing. He wanted a relationship, not a slave, a partner in life.
“And if this thing with us goes where it could go I might always wonder if it’s enough for you. And you might never ask for more because you’ll think you don’t deserve more.
What if looking at me always reminds you of how you came to be mine? What if being with me means you can’t ever totally forget that hell that they put you through? I know this is a lot but I need this on the table.
In the situation we’re in we can’t afford to just play things by ear. Does what I’m saying even make sense?”
I nodded, “It does. I know my head isn’t on straight. But I know that with all that you’ve given me so far that I have a very good chance of it finding its way to straightening out. ”
He rolled his eyes, “I feel like a fuckin’ dog.”
“Listen,” I got up onto an elbow and touched his face, “Do you not look in the mirror and see all that is you? Do you not see that you could never ever be a consolation prize to any girl? I won’t forget what I’ve been through whether I’m here with you or totally alone. It’ll always be with me. We have to look like we’re together so that they don’t think you’re a threat. So just take me. I’m yours. Won’t that make it easier? Then you’re not pretending. You’re just going about your life.
You’re just doing what anyone else who had a Kruna slave would do. Instead of adding me to the list of complications, just go about your life. I won’t complicate it.
I’ll enjoy every minute I have being yours as a gift because it is one. You’ll be giving me a beautiful gift, Drake. And you’ve already done so much for me I hate to ask you for a thing and I don’t want you keeping me out of obligation and robbing yourself of being happy and being with someone who you choose to be with instead of feeling obligated to keep someone you’re stuck with but I’m asking you not to feel guilty about what we just did. It was beautiful.
Just keep me for now, maybe? I’ll work hard to be everything you need and I won’t try to make you feel bad later if you don’t want me anymore.”
“Baby…” he said but let that hang.
“When the day comes that you decide we can safely part, I’ll deal. I won’t go all stalker crazy on you because I’ve been trained to behave and I will behave. I won’t ever do anything to make you regret rescuing me.
And I won’t expect you to be mine back. If you want someone else, you do what you want. I’m yours and only yours for as long as you decide but you won’t be expected to be faithful to me. You’re in charge. If you want me, I’m here. I will have no expectations.”
Wow, that was a lot. It must’ve sounded rehearsed to him, like I was trying to sell him something.
“Naw,” he touched my face, “If I’m with you, I’m only with you.”
I breathed deep and choked up. I shouldn’t have done that. It revealed too much.
“See, already you feel deep and I could f**k that up.” He ran his fingers through my hair.
“How?” I leaned into his wrist. I kept revealing too much with him.
“Am I always gonna wonder if you really want out?” his eyes roved over my face.
I shrugged, “I don’t know.”
“Are you gonna want out?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Don’t know any more than you don’t know if you’re gonna want out. When people decide to be together they don’t know if it’s forever. They only know they wanna see where it goes. I’d love to see where this could go.”
He smiled, “That answer is a good sign. A very fuckin’ good sign.”
“Maybe my head isn’t as f****d up as we think,” I shrugged. But it probably was.
We were quiet for a minute, cuddling.
“What do you wanna do tonight?” he asked, tucking hair behind my ear.
“Me?” God, he was sweet.
“Yeah, you. You’ve had your first outing since Thailand, shopping and the restaurant. You wanna go out tonight or you wanna stay in?”
“I wanna stay in,” I answered.
“What do you wanna do tonight?” Drake caressed my cheek with his thumb.
“I wanna please you, Master,” I said, “And maybe if I’m a very good girl, after I do, we can eat some more of that spaghetti here in bed while we watch the hockey game?”
His eyes lit up and his hands slid up from my h**s to my shoulders and then he pinned me to the bed, “Angel,” he breathed almost right against my lips, “I’m not your Master. But is it twisted that I’m totally okay with pretending in this bed that I am?”
“I’m not sure I’m the best judge here but I’m gonna say no. Not twisted at all.” I grinned.
He smiled big and then he m****d into my mouth as his tongue dipped in.
I spread my legs wide, arched my back and absorbed the feeling of his c**k stretching me, “I’ve gotta add, too, if you were to choose to be my Master, I have a feeling you’d be very good at it.”
Two hours later we’d had s*x two more times. He had stamina. Gorgeous and generously amazing in bed. Rough, biting, gripping, dominant, taking what he wanted, not treating me like a piece of china that would break, and giving me o****m after o****m.
And he was a badass from a powerful family who could protect me. There was a long list of pluses for me to want him, no minuses whatsoever. Sadly, there were mostly minuses on his list of reasons for keeping me.
The only pluses were endless s*x and keeping the Kruna bosses oblivious. I wished that I could give him more than those reasons to keep me.
He got up and fried up our leftover spaghetti and meatballs and brought it in and we ate it in his bed while watching a hockey game. Damn. Fried spaghetti was the best spaghetti ever. It was buttery and crispy in spots and I ate a massive plate of it. I ate so much of it I think I slipped into a carb coma.
He loved hockey and really seemed happy with the idea that I liked it, too. I didn’t bother telling him that I played hockey on a girls’ team back in high school. I fell asleep with my head on his belly and his fingers in my hair sometime during the third period.
I heard when he flicked the TV off. He shifted me off his stomach and then curled me up against him, his hand on my bare bottom. He gave it a squeeze, “Hey Angel?” he called out.
“Yes?” I opened my eyes.
“How do you feel about kids?”
“Kids?”
“Yeah.”
“I went to school to be a teacher. Love kids,” I said sleepily.
He squeezed me tight, kind of too tight, “Yeah?”
“Uh huh. I taught grade one in Thailand at an English school before… before you know. You like kids?”
He let out a long breath, “You wanna talk about how you went from being a teacher to being at Kruna?” he asked softly.
“No,” I answered, “Is that okay?”
“Yeah,” he kissed my hand, “you tell me that story later.”
“Thank you,”
“What’s your name, baby?”
“It’s Angel, Master.”
“How about when you tell me that story you tell me your name.”
“You know my name.” I said softly.
“Baby…”This content is © .
“Drake, if I ever say that other name out loud again something really bad’ll happen.”
“No it won’t because I won’t let it,” he said into my ear and kissed my neck.
He didn’t answer me about him wanting kids.
“Can’t I just be Angel?” I asked.
He sighed, “For now, alright. Goodnight my Angel. Sweet dreams.”
“Thanks to you they will be,” I said, fingering my collar and curled into him. His Angel. Swoon. I hoped I could be his angel forever.
He gave me a squeeze.
“Drake?”
“Yeah, baby?”
“Do you call all girls angel?”