CHAPTER 12: THE WEIGHT OF SHADOWS

The evening sky was painted in warm shades of orange and violet, the last traces of daylight stretching across the horizon. A gentle breeze rustled through the trees, carrying the scent of damp earth and blooming flowers as Myura sat cross-legged in her backyard.

She stared at the ground, absentmindedly picking at the grass beneath her fingers. Despite the peaceful setting, her mind was far from calm.

Kazuki knew.

He had told her yesterday, his voice uncertain but firm:

"I can see it, Myura. Your aura… it’s different from everyone else’s. It’s dark. And it’s getting stronger."

She hadn’t known what to say. She had laughed at first, thinking he was joking, but the serious look in his eyes had quickly wiped the amusement from her face.

"I don’t think you’re bad or anything," he had reassured her. "But I… I don’t understand it. And that scares me."

That had hurt the most.

It wasn’t that Kazuki had turned on her—he hadn’t. He was still here, still talking to her, still treating her mostly the same. But there was hesitation in his voice now, a distance in his eyes that hadn’t been there before.

She didn’t want to see that look anymore.

She didn’t want him to be afraid of her.

That was why she had made up her mind—she would suppress her aura, no matter how hard it was. If Kazuki couldn’t see it, then maybe things could go back to normal.

Maybe… he would stop looking at her like that.

THE FIRST STEP

Zenko floated nearby, perched on a wooden fence, his golden eyes watching her in quiet contemplation. He had been silent for a while, letting her sit with her thoughts.

Finally, he spoke. “You’re trying to suppress it, aren’t you?”

Myura looked up, slightly startled. “How did you—?”

Zenko gave a small chuckle. “I’m apart you, Myura. I know almost everything about you…aaand I can feel what you’re doing.” He tilted his head. “You’re thinking about Kazuki.”

She sighed, rubbing her temples. “He told me he can see it. My aura. He said it’s different… that it scares him.”

Zenko’s ears twitched. “And now you want to suppress it so he won’t feel that way anymore?”

Myura nodded, determination flickering in her crimson eyes. “If I can keep him from seeing it, maybe he won’t look at me like I’m… different.”

Zenko regarded her for a moment before letting out a small sigh. “I won’t say it’s impossible. But it won’t be easy.”

“I don’t care,” Myura said firmly. “I have to try.”

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Zenko’s gaze softened slightly. “Then I’ll guide you. But listen carefully—suppressing your aura isn’t like hiding your emotions. It’s like trying to hold back a flood with your bare hands.** It will take an enormous amount of energy, and it won’t feel natural for a long time.**”

“How long?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.

Zenko flicked his tail. “Years.”

Myura swallowed, but her resolve didn’t waver. “Then I’ll start now.”

ATTEMPT ONE: TOO MUCH FORCE

Zenko floated down, landing gracefully beside her. “Alright. Close your eyes,” he instructed.

Myura obeyed, inhaling deeply as she let herself sink into her own mind.

“First,” Zenko continued, “feel your aura—not just as magic, but as a part of you. It’s like your heartbeat, always there, always moving.”

She did. The darkness within her pulsed like an unseen force, shifting beneath her skin. It wasn’t something she had ever needed to control—it had always been there, as natural as breathing.

“Now,” Zenko said, “imagine pulling it inward, like a cloak wrapping tightly around you. Don’t crush it—just seal it away.”

Myura focused, picturing the dark energy shrinking, retreating deep into herself. At first, it seemed to work. The shadows around her dimmed, her presence growing fainter—

Then the darkness pushed back.

A sudden force slammed through her chest, and her control shattered. The aura she had tried to contain erupted outward, sending a gust of unnatural wind whipping through the yard.

She gasped, stumbling backward onto her hands. A dull headache pulsed in her skull.

Zenko remained calm. “You forced it too fast,” he said. “Your aura isn’t something you can shove into a box. You have to coax it inward, not force it.”

Myura groaned, rubbing her forehead. “Okay… Again.”

ATTEMPT TWO: SLOW AND STEADY

Closing her eyes again, Myura inhaled deeply. This time, she took a different approach.

Instead of trying to crush the aura down all at once, she visualized it as a tide slowly retreating from the shore. A gentle pull, bit by bit. She guided it inward, whispering to it in her mind, coaxing it into stillness.

The energy resisted at first, pushing against her control like an untamed beast. But she didn’t fight it.

She guided it.

Seconds stretched into minutes. The air around her stilled. The shadows dimmed.

Then—

Silence.

Myura opened her eyes. The usual dark mist that subtly lingered around her… was gone.

Zenko’s golden eyes widened slightly. “You did it.”

She looked down at her hands, turning them over. They looked… normal. No black mist, no flickering energy.

She exhaled shakily, her chest feeling strangely hollow without the presence of her aura. “That was—”

The crushing exhaustion hit her all at once.

She gasped, nearly collapsing, barely managing to keep herself upright. A sharp pressure squeezed her skull, her vision blurring slightly.

Zenko immediately padded closer, his voice calm but firm. “That’s what I meant. Suppressing it takes more out of you than you think.”

She groaned, wiping sweat from her brow. “This sucks.”

Zenko chuckled. “You did well for your first time.”

She forced herself to stand, her legs weak but steady. “It’s not enough,” she muttered. “I have to do it longer. Tomorrow, I’m meeting Kazuki. I have to keep this up.”

Zenko studied her, his gaze unreadable. Finally, he nodded. “Then we’ll train every day.”

THE FIRST TEST

The sun dipped below the horizon as Myura finally retreated inside. Her limbs ached, and exhaustion dragged at her body, but she couldn’t rest yet.

Tomorrow, she would see Kazuki.

Tomorrow, she would have to keep this up.

Tomorrow… she would not let him see her darkness.

As she lay in bed, her crimson eyes drifting shut, Zenko curled up beside her, watching over her with quiet confidence.

Tomorrow will be the first true test.