Chapter 3

Hana met her in the piano room at school, playing Clair De Lune with an elegant grace that awoke deep buried feelings within Hana that she thought she suppressed long ago. Such a melancholy song. Yet, Hana found herself drawn to the piano room.

A tall, slender girl with a heart-shaped face, aristocratic nose, and longer fingers was sitting at the piano bench, enraptured within the song that she played.

The floorboards underneath Hana’s shoes creaked. The beautiful girl stopped playing and regarded Hana. Hana blushed. It was as if a spotlight centered itself on her, exposing her. She stared down at the ground and looked anywhere except for the other girl.

“You are Hana-san, aren’t you?” the girl asked.

Hana let out a barely perceptible squeak which meant yes, and then went to play with one of the braids that hung over her shoulders. God, she probably looked so stupid right now, and she was sure that the other girl marked her off as weird or boring or creepy.

“I see,” the other girl said. “My name is Misaki. I’ve seen you scurry around the school sometimes with your head down and rushing to classes without saying hello to anyone.”

“I’m not good at making friends,” Hana whispered. “People think that I’m weird and creepy.”

“What I think is that you should stand proud and tall. Look people in the eye.”

Misaki smiled gently at her. Hana’s heart flutter a beat inside her throat. The other girl put a reassuring hand on Hana’s shoulder, and Hana managed to look at Misaki in the eye.

“I heard you playing the piano,” Hana said. “I was just curious to see who was playing.”

“Is there a particular piece that you wanted to hear?”

“A tragic song. I like those the best.”

“A tragic song, huh?”

Misaki made her way to the piano bench, spread her fingers across the ebony and ivory keys, and played Ave Maria Schubert. There was something almost nostalgic in the sonorous notes reverberating throughout the darkened room. Hana felt the vibrations of emotion thrum as Misaki’s hands effortlessly scaled across the piano in grand flourishes and sweeping gestures.

She closed her eyes and receded back into a meditative trance that drifted her away from reality and into her own personal world. Swaying in rhythm to the music, moved by an internal metronome as essential to her as her circadian rhythm, a light-hearted and light-headed sensation of flight alleviated her depressive spirit.

Each note resonated with the depth of her pathos personified as passion. Misaki didn’t need words to express them; music alone was enough. She pored through every note, each one pulsing like a heartbeat. Hana foolishly thought that Misaki conveyed the sincerity of her tone, the resonance of her love, her soul, to her. Her heart rose and fell with each lilting note, visualizing sensations rather than imagery. Hana never visualized well; she was an emotional creature, and she felt that emotions contained more vibrancy and life than colors ever could.

Once Misaki finished playing, Hana found herself so entranced with the wonders of the beautiful song that she barely heard what Misaki said. She snapped out of her daze and asked, “What did you say, Misaki-san?”

“I love the piano because you can express so many emotions through the notes. I always feel that I can convey myself better through music rather than words.”

“I felt like I could understand you while you were playing that music,” Hana said, looking down as she spoke. “You certainly put your heart and soul into playing the piano. It must be nice, to have something to be devoted to whole-heartedly.”

“Don’t you have anything that you would pour your heart and soul into, Hana-san? Life isn’t worth living if you don’t have some kind of passion in your life.”

Hana thought for a moment, and shook her head. There was nothing that she devoted herself to with as much dedication as Misaki did to the piano. She had no special talents, or so she felt. She was a plain-looking girl with no ambition, content to wander through life rather than pursue something meaningful. Sometimes Hana contemplated the meaning of her existence, and seemed to find it meaningless. Though something in Misaki’s piano playing ignited a spark inside her, something that she never felt before. A warm glowing feeling inside her chest, where she was content with things and maybe buoyant with life. Somehow, Misaki’s music reached deep into her heart, entranced her, luring her like the songs of sirens that lured sailors into the waters.

“I would like to hear you play again,” Hana said.

Misaki gave her a brilliant smile. “Of course. Come to the piano room anytime and I shall play whatever piece you would like.”

--x--

Hana would come to the piano room everyday just to listen to Misaki playing. Every time, Hana felt that soaring sensation within her and a warm glow within her that erupted into a full-blown supernova. Hana dutifully made her way to the piano room every time Misaki was there, and Misaki would play the pieces that she liked, just as she promised. Once she familiarized herself with Misaki’s music, Hana decided that she wanted to learn more and more about Misaki. Likewise, Misaki wanted to learn more about Hana, and this mutual friendship left Hana feeling a warm contentment that she gained a new friend.

“Hana-san,” Misaki said after she finished playing, “would you like to give a try playing the piano?”

Hana poked her two index fingers together. “But I don’t know how to read the notes…”

“I’ll teach you. Come sit at the piano bench.”

Hana did as she was told, and when she sat down, Misaki was standing right behind her, hovering her hands over her own. Hana blushed, though said nothing. Misaki then explained the notes for the left and right hands, and the keys that corresponded with each notes. The first song that Hana played with Misaki’s guidance was a simple one, a little tune known as Mary Had A Little Lamb. First, Misaki played on top of her hands to guide her, though eventually Hana could play the tune without Misaki. When she discovered that she could play the piano, Hana beamed.

“You’re a good teacher,” Hana said.

“I’m just glad to impart knowledge to others,” Misaki said with a smile. “The piano is a wonderful medium, isn’t it? Do you understand what I mean when I said that you can express so many emotions through the notes?”

“Yeah, I think I do.”

“I can teach you to play some more, if you like. You have a talent for it, Hana. Believe me. You could become even better than I am, if you practice.”

Hana looked down. “I don’t think that I could be as good as you, Misaki-san.”

“Of course you can. You need more confidence in yourself. As long as you believe in yourself, you can do anything that you wanted. Remember that.”

“Misaki-san, you play like a professional. You could go somewhere with this.”

“I’m just someone who is passionate for music and grew up having instruments in the house.”

“You can play other instruments as well?”

“At home there is a violin, a flute, and a harp. And of course a piano. It’s easier to learn how to play other instruments when you start with the piano, and you can branch off from there. What about you? Is there anything in particular that you like to do?”

“Well, I like to read, I guess, though I’m not really all that book-smart. I know a few things here and there, but there’s so much that I don’t know. The more that I learn and read, I realize how much I don’t know at all. I try to fill in all the gaps in my knowledge, but it’s impossible.”

If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

“That’s part of being humble and wise. Knowing that you don’t know everything. There will always be gaps in knowledge, but it’s more important that the knowledge that you do have is used properly. That’s all that matters.”

“I think you’re right about that,” Hana said, smiling an intoxicated smile towards Misaki. “And isn’t it about experience and making connections?”

“Exactly. The piano has taught me many things. It taught me the basics for note-reading, which I could transfer to playing other instruments. Not only that, but the piano taught me how to express my emotions and feelings. It’s something that I’m passionate about, that I put my heart and soul into because I love music. Whenever I try to play the piano, I also try to paint pictures with notes. Didn’t you find yourself imagining things while I was playing the piano?”

“I could picture moonlight reflecting across the lake when you played Claire de Lune. I saw it so vividly inside my head. It was amazing. You really do paint pictures with notes.”

“Thank you. I wasn’t always good at the piano, though,” Misaki said while folding her hands in her lap. “I one time composed a piece for my mother when I was little. I put everything that I had into that song, though once I played the piece on the piano, my mother said that it was childish, amateurish and technically incorrect. She was a strict piano teacher, and nothing ever seemed to satisfy her.”

Hana put a hand to her mouth and shook her head. “You’re a wonderful piano player. Your mother never should’ve said that about the song that you wrote for her.”

“It’s fine. To be truthful, it was amateurish and childish. Years passed by and I haven’t written any original material of my own, though one day, I hope that I can create a piece that moves someone. Something that conveys my feelings and heart to them. Because that’s what good music does. It lets you see deep into the musician’s emotions, laid out bare for all to see. It’s a kind of soul resonance; your heart knows it, your entire body knows it, deep down to the marrow of your bones.”

“I think that you will be able to do it. I know you can.”

“Yes. My mother knew the technicalities of a piece and could play with precision. Though she could never play with emotion. She was never an emotional woman. I might make some technical mistakes, but at least I put heart into my music.”

“Your mother only cared about the technicalities. But she never thought about the time and dedication you put into a piece for her? That’s so sad. Though what’s also sad is the fact that I think there is nothing in the world that ever moved your mother.”

“No. She never cried during funerals and she never seemed to be particularly proud of me, even though I worked hard to be where I am now. We came from two different disciplines—she believes in playing all the notes in the way that they’re written, and I deviate and make up my own songs, improvise, putting some more emotion into it. It always annoyed her when I did that, and she would slap my hands and say Misaki Hiraga, you’re not playing the piece correctly, you never do. Enough about me, though. How about your parents?”

“My parents...” Hana paused. “...My father left when I was very young. My mom would still hang out his clothes to dry for people to see, so that people would think that he was still there. I was forced to become studious, and read lots of books at a young age. Mom said if I studied hard, I would be able to go to a good college, and get a decent job to help support her when she was older. She also said that, maybe, just maybe, if I could get entrance into a prestigious school, my father would come back.”

“I’m sorry,” Misaki said softly, as she put a comforting hand upon Hana.

“Don’t be. So anyway, I studied day and night, barely getting a wink of sleep most days. It was always books for me, and I didn’t have time to make friends. I wanted to make sure that I got good grades at school, so that my father could see them and perhaps be proud of me. When I managed to get an application for entrance into a prestigious school, I was so proud of myself. I thought that Daddy would come home with us. But after all that work and effort, it was for nothing. He never came back.”

“It’s horrible that you had to go through all that. Now I understand why you seem so shy and reserved all the time. It must have been hard, growing up without your father.”

“It’s okay. It’s all in the past. I don’t think about him much anymore. So, I guess the thing is to look forward to the future. I will continue to study and get good grades. Perhaps I can become a veterinarian one day.”

“You like working with animals? What’s your favorite animal?”

Hana fidgeted with the ends of her skirt. “Rabbits. I think they’re sweet and cuddly animals.”

“I like cats. I think that there will be no technology nor advanced human knowledge that will ever understand cats. They’re mysterious creatures, aren’t they?”

“I’m allergic to cats, so I can’t have one.” Hana sighed. “Though I’m sure it would be lovely to own one.”

“I took care of a stray once. I gave it a saucer of milk every day to make sure that it had something to eat. Though my mother chased it away. She was never too fond of animals, especially cats.”

“That’s a shame.”

“It is. I felt lonely at the mansion, without any animal companion to befriend me. Though when you first came into the piano room, you’re the first real friend that I ever had.”

Hana looked into Misaki’s eyes for a moment, before she clasped both of her hands within her own. “You’re my first real friend too. I’m glad that we’re friends.”

--x--

Months passed and they became inseparable friends. Hana would always come to the piano room to listen to Misaki play, and Misaki would dedicate her time and devotion to playing songs for Hana. However, one particular day, Misaki said that she was going to perform a special piece for Hana. Excited, Hana went into the piano room with anticipation and saw Misaki waiting for her, looking beautiful as always.

“After ten years have passed, I decided to write an original song,” Misaki finally said with a smile as she put her hands hovering above the keys. “I tried to think of something special, something that expressed everything about me into music. I thought and I thought, until the song came to me out of the blue. Please listen and enjoy while I play.”

With that, Misaki began.

With a flourish of her hands, the notes magically painted beautiful imagery inside Hana’s head. She pictured a young little girl sitting at the piano, taking her first few tentative steps playing the piano, halting, hesitant, yet hopeful at the same time. As the notes continued to resound throughout the room, Hana imagined a young girl composing an original piece for her mother, who then rejected her and told her that her writing was technically incorrect, a deep scar that afflicted Misaki till this very day. But as she continued on, the song lifted, then soared and crescendo and climaxed into a wonderful burst of sound that was like aural fireworks.

Hana found herself crying tears at the piano piece that Misaki composed. It was beautiful. She managed to convey her emotions and life story into a simple piece of music. Hana clapped when the song was over, and Misaki was blushed.

“That was beautiful, Misaki-chan!” Hana wiped the tears away with her closed hands. “I think that was your best performance yet! You really should go professional in playing the piano!”

“I had a muse to inspire me. In truth, this song is dedicated to you, my dearest friend.”

“To me?”

Misaki smiled and nodded. “Ever since you walked in the piano room that day, you were the only one to genuinely praise my piano playing skills. After having been trained by my mom to play the piano her way, someone listening to the earnest and genuine way that I really play has helped me get over my mother insulting my piano piece dedicated to her. I decided if I were to write another piano piece, it would be in dedication to you, someone who loved the pure, honest way that I played.”

“I adore your piano playing, Misaki. You’re just so amazingly talented at it; I can’t believe that your mother couldn’t see your brilliance. To dedicate such a song to me; I’m truly honored.”

Misaki smiled gently with a blush upon her delicate cheeks. “I’m glad that you liked it.”

--x--

A few more months have passed. Ever since that day that Misaki played a piano piece dedicated to her, Hana realized that she was slowly but surely falling in love with Misaki. She didn’t realize it until now, though besides being her only true friend, Misaki was also the first person that Hana ever felt the beginnings of a crush on. At first, Hana didn’t want to believe that she was in love with her best friend. From what she knew about love, it didn’t last forever, especially since her father separated himself from his wife and daughter. And yet when it came to Misaki, Hana would feel her breath catch in her throat and think about her all the time.

Today, Hana decided, was the day that she would confess to Misaki. She felt butterflies fluttering in her stomach at the prospect, but she decided that she will confess now or she will never be able to do it again. So. Today was the day that she would say it. That she loved Misaki Hiraga. There was a slight perk in Hana’s step as she began making her way towards school, hoping to see Misaki. When she arrived, however, the atmosphere was solemn and the students were silent.

Hana caught the sleeve of one of the students that remained solemn-faced, and said, “Hey, do you know what’s going on? Do you know where Misaki is?”

The girl’s face wilted. “Oh, I’m so sorry. You and Hiraga-san were good friends, weren’t you? I’d hate to tell you this, but Hiraga-san is dead. It was a traffic accident.”

Her world receded. There was no sight. There was no sound. Her vision blurred.

“Hana-san? Hana-san? Are you all right?”

Her face contorted into a frown.. Misaki was dead? No, no, that was impossible. She still had to be alive. Hana was going to tell Misaki what she truly felt. They were going to go on dates together, maybe eventually get married, and grow old together. There were so many things she wanted to share. But Misaki was dead. The girl had said so.

Feeling as though she might retch, Hana reeled away. She ran into the school, down the corridors blindly, and made her way to the school roof. She didn’t know what she was doing up here, but something compelled her to be here.

She reached out to the chained link fence and let the tears fall. Misaki, who was so full of vibrant life and talent, was dead. It seemed so unfair. that her life was cruelly taken away from her at the prime of her life. Now, Hana had no one.

Hana took a deep shuddering breath. Why did God have to take Misaki away from her? Her heart clenched.

She glanced down, down the side of the roof. If she died too, would she be able to see Misaki again?

A new determination overcame Hana, and she climbed the chained link fence until she was on the other side of it. She held onto the chain link fence with one hand and examined the plummet down. Could she really do it? Could she really jump?

Ever since you walked in the piano room that day, you were the only one to genuinely praise my piano playing skills. …I decided if I were to write another piano piece, it would be in dedication to you, someone who loved the pure, honest way that I played.

Hana closed her eyes then leapt into the unknown.