This is definitely becoming a worrying habit.

Given everything, he had been through, from the loss of his family, a traumatic battle, to finally losing what little hope he’d had of saying goodbye, Rohl knew his reaction was nothing to be ashamed of. But that didn’t mean he had to like it, what was the point of shutting down when the nightmares would still be there when you awoke, he was simply delaying the inevitable, delaying facing the truth of his family's final passing.

They are lost to me.

It was a thought that had plagued him ever since he had awoken upon the temple’s bed. Rohl was not exactly sure of what had happened after he had passed out, but he could at least assume someone had carried him to this bedchamber and allowed him to rest undisturbed for gods knows how long.

They had even been kind enough as to bring him a slice of bread, butter and a knife to spread it with. As thankful as Rohl was for the meal, he didn’t move an inch out from his bed to reach it, instead, he simply remained prone and stared unforgivingly at the knife.

The urge to reach out and take it was small at first, a little scratch at the corner of his mind, but the longer he stared, the greater the urge grew. It was as if his entire body was overcome with this new desire.

I might as well. There’s no reason not to, nothing is going to change if I do or don’t.

Even with his own thoughts weighing in, Rohl remained fixed in position unmoving, he simply continued to stare and wait until his boredom finally drew him to action.

With somewhat slow hobbled movements, Rohl slipped out of the bed, collected his belongings including the small note that had been slipped under his clothes and simply left the room. Dawdling wouldn’t do him any good, not when he still had a plan to start and a monster to slay.

Thankfully the bedchamber seemed to be within the same area of the entranceway, a small blessing given how hard it would have been to navigate the temple alone. And with the exit in sight, Rohl wasted no time in pacing across the temple stone floor and finally returning to the outside world.

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Well, at least I have some semblance of the time.

From what Rohl could tell from the sun’s location, it still seemed to be early morning, perhaps a little later than he usually would have awoken but late enough that a handful of other people seemed to have already begun their day.

It would have been nice to say goodbye or at least thank them for everything.

The followers of Thanatos had been good to him, even if it was a part of their tasks, they had definitely made the trail far easier upon his soul. And with the thought of the priestess still within his mind, Rohl finally took out the note and opened it.

The temple has buried their ashes in the east graveyard. All of those under his care deserve a final resting place.

The note’s message was simple and short, but as much as it should have risen a new desire within him, to see their tombstones, lay flowers and weep, Rohl couldn’t. Instead, his steps took him away from the temple and back towards the main roads.

I just can't, not yet, how can I face them now? I'll do something to earn their forgiveness and then I will be back.

With that Rohl finally left the temple's ground and let his steps lead him back towards the guild. His plan may have been rather basic but for now, Rohl cared very little about that. He would take it one step at a time, join the guild, find somewhere to spend his nights, take a contract and slay whatever needed slaying. It was a simple plan and one he would surely have to repeat and modify many times over before he was eventually ready to take revenge.

But it was at least something, something he could put his focus on and distract himself with. Something to take his attention off his aching body and pained spirit. Something to focus on.

It was in truth a distraction that allowed him to make good, uninterrupted progress through the city with no unwelcome thoughts to lead him astray. He ignored the streets as they grew ever more populated, ignored the first calls of merchants as they opened up their stalls, and finally ignored the temptation of food and goods from the travelling merchants and the calls of innkeepers as they sought to tempt people in.

It allowed him to drown out the loud bangs of blacksmiths working metal, the sounds of furnaces smelting glass, of craftsmen chopping and sawing wood. Even the shouts and calls of a passing guard patrol went unnoticed as Rohl thought about one thing and one thing only.

That was until finally, Rohl's steps led him to the large wooden doors of the guild and his best hope of finding some purpose once again.