The celebration of my marriage to Lord Louweris drags on without excitement. The attendees gather around me, their false compliments betraying that they are merely seeking an advantage. Lord Louweris remains steadfastly by my side, holding my hand tightly as if he never intends to let go. I struggle to find the right words—the ones he expects from me—and feign that his presence fills me with joy, even though it could hardly be more difficult.
Suddenly, Lords Velqorin and Sylas approach us. The two men shake hands, while Lord Louweris laughs loudly, and Lord Velqorin forces a smile.
“Zyar, my good old friend!” Louweris calls out with laughter, clapping him heartily on the shoulder. “How long has it been since we last saw each other?”
“Since last summer, if I remember correctly”, replies Lord Velqorin. “I heard a few months ago that you were looking to marry again. But I never thought you’d take such a young girl as your wife.”
“You know how it is”, says Louweris, grinning as he places his hand on my shoulder and lets it slide lower than I would like. “At this age, they have a special charm!”
He laughs again, but inside, I curl up in shame. His touch is unwanted and degrading, yet no one seems to notice—except for Lord Velqorin and Sylas, who are aware. Their glances make the situation even more humiliating, and I don’t know how to escape this embarrassment.
Finally, Louweris lets go of me, but not without giving me a slap as he passes by. I flinch and watch him, startled.
“I’ll leave you alone for a few minutes”, he says with a self-satisfied grin. “Stay where you are. The celebration will soon be over anyway.”
I nod silently and watch as he walks away. Only when he is out of sight do I take a deep breath and place my hand on my chest to calm my wildly beating heart.
Lord Velqorin and Sylas watch me in silence. Not a word escapes their lips. They have already tried to sway my father without success. Now I am the wife of a man far too old for me, likely with children my age.
“Princess, I...” Sylas begins hesitantly, but his voice remains distant. He searches for words, but finds none.
Instead, Lord Velqorin speaks: “If you need anything, you are always free to come to me.”
With a weak smile, I shake my head. “I’ve been surviving on my own in this world for a long time. This decision, made without my consent, will not break me.”
The lord nods silently and accepts my rejection. Despite all his victories, despite the armies he has defeated, a great heart beats in his chest. Lord Velqorin sees me for the first time today, yet he treats me better than the king has in recent years. Is this the kind of relationship a daughter should have with her father?
“Zyar!” the king suddenly calls with his usual cheerfulness. “I was hoping to catch you. How about you and your family spend the night in the castle? And tomorrow we can go hunting together.”
“We had planned to return to our castle after the departure of the princess and Lord Louweris”, Lord Velqorin replies politely.
“Elowirn will stay the night”, my father announces without looking at me. “The couple will depart only after the hunt. It’s late, and they have a three-day ride ahead of them.”
Velqorin hesitates briefly, his gaze shifting from his son to me. I say nothing, for my opinion does not matter.
“Very well”, the lord finally agrees. “We will accompany you on the hunt tomorrow.”
“Excellent!” King Mukuta exclaims joyfully, concluding the conversation with a hearty clap. “The servants will serve your favorite breakfast in honor of your visit tomorrow.”
My father laughs and gives Velqorin a friendly clap on the shoulder before hurrying off to the remaining guests. Many have already said their goodbyes, as the hour is late and they have a long ride ahead.
Lord Velqorin and his son bid me farewell with a silent nod and turn away. Sylas throws one last glance in my direction, his eyes reflecting the sadness he carries deep in his heart.
At the moment we danced in the middle of the hall, a fire ignited in both of us—one that was quickly extinguished. Yet somewhere within us, a spark still glows.
“Congratulations on your marriage, Lady Louweris”, the voice of Crown Prince Yula sounds. I glance to the side, surprised by his presence. “Your husband is truly a sight to behold. You’ve hit the jackpot!”
The queen laughs softly and adds, “Lord Louweris is already waiting for you in your chamber. Your luggage has been packed and is waiting in the carriage for tomorrow’s departure. For your sake, I have selected a nightgown that you will find on the bed.”
“In our chamber?” I repeat, confused and gripped by nervousness. “Surely it’s not expected that...”
“What did you think?” the queen asks with a feigned look of concern. “Do you believe this man wants you merely for decoration? You are to bear him heirs, and soon. Your father expects a son—and so does your husband.”
The queen snaps her fingers, and as if from nowhere, two maidservants appear beside me. They ensure I am taken to where I am expected.
My gaze shifts to Crown Prince Yula, my younger brother, who was born just two years after me. In his eyes, I see the same cold hatred that my father and his wife direct at me. They all despise me, and my marriage to Lord Louweris is nothing more than a welcome humiliation for them.
“As soon as I am king, I will make sure she never sets foot in this kingdom again, mother”, Yula says quietly, but with a clarity that takes my breath away as the maidservants lead me away.
No one but me, the maidservants, and the queen seems to have heard his words. But I understand what they mean: With my father’s death, my fate will be sealed, and my life will finally shatter.
Not that it’s any different now. Tomorrow, I will travel to Ashmond with Lord Louweris to rule beside him over this ancient, mysterious region. According to the legends, the Ascharans—what the inhabitants of Ashmond have always been called—came into the world from the Moon Lands long ago. How much truth there is in this legend, no one knows anymore, for the Ascharans were mercilessly hunted during wartime. Their golden hair was reason enough to accuse them of dark magic. It is said that a single strand of hair was enough to perform forbidden spells.
The legend speaks of two sisters who were separated by fate: one with golden hair and the other with red eyes. From their love and pain, the Ascharans arose—known for their golden hair and blood-red eyes. But if the books in our castle are to be believed, hardly anyone remains of them. Only one person is said to still carry the blood of the Ascharans—an ancient woman who likely lived long before Lord Louweris was born.
When I think of all these legends, reaching so deep into the past yet hardly anyone can confirm them, I wonder if there isn’t more to life than what we know as reality. The stranger who floated effortlessly through the air on that stormy day, and the voice that has accompanied me since childhood—they all belong to a world that doesn’t fit here.
The maidservants escort me to the door of my room. There stands Lord Louweris, his hand outstretched as the key is handed to him. The women bow deeply and withdraw to attend to their duties. Louweris takes my hand in his, and with the other, he opens the door. He allows me to enter first, following closely behind as I step into the room with uncertain steps.
My familiar room suddenly feels foreign. The empty bookshelves and the sight of my vanished belongings leave the space feeling strangely hollow. A suffocating feeling spreads within me.
Did the queen order the maidservants to treat my possessions with care? Or have I already been forgotten, like the contents of these now empty shelves?
That’s an absurd thought. Since I have lived in this castle, I have always been a nobody. Even this celebration, supposedly held in my honor, has made it clear that my presence means nothing to anyone.
“You had a lovely room”, says Lord Louweris, deliberately emphasizing the past tense. “In my estate, you will lead a better life starting tomorrow. This little bed is not worthy of a Lady Louweris. It’s a shame that your father let you sleep under these conditions.”
What am I supposed to say to that? Even if my life wasn’t that of a typical princess, I have always cherished this room as a refuge. Here, shielded from the influence of the king and queen, I could be myself. Here, I vented my anger at their control and eventually came to terms with my loneliness. Yet I know that Lord Louweris, now my husband, expects nothing but agreement. Disagreement would displease him and only bring me unnecessary trouble.
“You’re right, Lord Louweris”, I reluctantly concede.
“In the presence of strangers, you will call me Lord Louweris, child”, he interjects sharply. “But within our own four walls, you will address me as your beloved.”
My Beloved? Is he completely insane? He calls me a child and, in the same breath, demands that I honor him with a pet name? The thought disgusts me, yet I am at his mercy. As repulsed as I am by his behavior, I can feel the weight of his authority pressing down on me. Even though he is many years older, he is a man who has fought countless battles—and I am alone before him. I do not wish to underestimate his strength.
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“If you are tired...” I begin, my voice faltering as a lump forms in my throat. I force myself to say the next words. “...my beloved.” A moment of silence passes before I find the strength to continue. “Then I will prepare your bed.“
”My bed?” Lord Louweris looks at me, confusion etched on his face. “You know that you will be sleeping in it with me, don’t you? You are now my wife, and as such, you will spend the nights at my side.“
Secretly, I had hoped that this aspect of marriage would play only a formal role. But what had I expected? A man like him does not marry a young bride without intentions.
I stand frozen, unable to move as I watch him. He goes to the door, turns the key in the lock that had been given to him, and carefully puts it in his jacket pocket, which he then drapes over a chair. Not a sound escapes my lips. I pray that his back-and-forth takes more time, that the inevitable can be delayed just a little longer.
But to my misfortune, the Lord stands directly behind me, whispering softly in my ear. I flinch, trying to stay calm, aware of the potential consequences. His hand glides over my body, and I feel his warm breath, sending a shiver down my spine. I would have preferred to create distance immediately.
“You have a remarkable presence”, says Lord Louweris, brushing his hand across my chest. “Your father told me you are still inexperienced.”
At that moment, I feel the urge to turn away from him.I face him, pressing my dress tightly against myself to shield my body. Lord Louweris looks at me seriously, his hands clenched into fists.
“Do you wish to resist?” the man hisses with an irritated undertone, stepping closer. “Listen well, child. You belong to me, and you will submit!“
I shake my head in fear, wanting nothing more than for him to leave the room immediately. The desire to escape this place is so strong that I forget how safe it once made me feel.
Lord Louweris grips my hair roughly, pulling me to my feet to look me in the eye.
“No one taught you manners”, he hisses in disbelief, tightening his grip. Pain shoots through me as I wince. “I have married many women. A little child like you will not be a problem.“
He reaches for my neck, pulling me to him with such force that I cannot resist. The fury driving him at this moment gives him an unimaginable strength.While one hand holds me firmly, the other slips down to my dress, which he effortlessly pulls down.
Exposed before this stranger, the desire to sink into the ground becomes overwhelming. Lord Louweris eyes me hungrily and presses my hands to the side, which I had tried to use to cover myself.He shoves me onto the bed and leans over me. The man does not glance at my face even once. Instead, he focuses on my body, touching and pinching me. With all my might, I attempt to fight back. Unexpectedly, he strikes me sharply across the face.
“I’m too old for these games”, he hisses, unfazed. “You will learn to listen to your husband.“
”Don’t you feel disgust for yourself when you want to force a young girl into something?” I ask, anger rising within me, realizing my choice of words only after I say them.
Where did I find the courage to contradict him? Have I lost my mind? This man is my husband and a good friend of my father, who already despises me. Any further misstep will lead to my downfall and prevent any possible life of freedom.
“What did you say?” Lord Louweris growls. “Have you taken it upon yourself to question me? You may be the princess of this kingdom, but in this bed, you are my possession and will not speak unless you are asked!“
The courage that brought me to this situation dissipates. I am speechless, and my heart races so loudly I can hear it in my ears. Suddenly, he strikes me again—my vision blurs.
His unwanted touches come to an end. Lord Louweris unfastens his trousers, revealing his masculinity that promises pain in the coming moments. I press my legs together, and as a response, I receive another slap that sends my world reeling.
“You will bear me a son”, he commands as if a woman could control the course of nature, pulling my legs apart. “Be a good child and obey your lord.“
Before Lord Louweris can continue, something within me stirs. The fear of being violated by this man sends me into a trance-like state. For the next few moments, it feels as if I am observing the events from someone else’s perspective while still seeing through my own eyes.
Out of the corner of my eye, I spot a hairpin left behind by one of the maids, as my own are packed away in the carriage. Without a second thought, I reach for the pin and stab it directly into Lord Louweris’s eye. A bone-chilling scream escapes his lips as he falls backward.
“You wretch!” he bellows in anger, unable to rise due to the unbearable pain.
I jump up and hastily throw on my dress, leaving it unbuttoned.
“The pain you feel now”, I hiss, looking at him with contempt. “Is nothing compared to what you wanted to do to me.“
”You will pay for this!” he groans, trying in vain to shout at me. He lacks the strength. “I will whip you! I will break all your bones! My possession will have no will!“
”How delightful that I am not your possession”, I retort coolly. “Lady Louweris? I am Vespera, and I am my own person.“
With a disdainful spit at his feet, I rush to his coat to search for the key that will allow me to escape. His scream might have woken someone, but given that the castle is vast and my room is high up, the chances are slim. Still, I know that Queen Mayyira is surely planning something and may have stationed someone near the room. But I cannot let this opportunity slip away. It doesn’t matter if I survive outside the castle; I just want to escape this place.
With a determined swing, I open the door and quietly lock it behind me, preventing Lord Louweris from yelling and alerting the entire castle. In a hurried but silent run, I make my way to the lowest floor, where the stables await me. There stands the carriage with my most valuable belongings, the only hope for my escape. In this conspicuous dress, I cannot remain unnoticed. Luckily, years ago, I sewed pants and a light blouse that now give me the necessary freedom of movement. The warm days protect me from the cold of the night. As a child, I hated sewing, and now this skill saves my life.
Each of my steps echoes in the vast halls of the castle, like the pounding of my quickening heart that begins to thud in my chest. At this late hour, most soldiers are stationed in the dungeons or at the bridge to fend off unwanted intruders. My father had seen no reason to watch over me, as I was always trapped in my room. Today, however, he is convinced that Lord Louweris has me under his control. Perhaps, just perhaps, today is the day I can reclaim my freedom.
“Vespera... come to me!”
That voice! I finally hear it again! I didn’t imagine it as a child! Its call, reaching me at this critical moment, must be connected to my escape! My courage has restored my connection to the voice I thought I had lost in my childhood. The countless oppressions of the queen had broken my will, but today I have regained that will to resist the terrible grasp of Lord Louweris.
The voice does not specify where I should meet it, yet I can only envision the royal gardens before my mind’s eye. There, right there, is where I last heard it. An inexplicable pull, as if the path is already marked out, leads me there.With my heart racing, I head determinedly toward the stables to follow the call of the voice. It is hard to believe how quickly I reach my first destination. Before me stands the lord’s carriage, the man who is still marked by the pin I recently stabbed into his eye.A strange courage, wild and untamed, floods my veins, filling me with a strength I cannot explain. I should be horrified by my actions, yet instead, I feel an indescribable, almost intoxicating joy. It’s as if I have discovered a part of myself that fascinates and frightens me at the same time. Without this newfound determination, I would not be here—I would not feel the freshness of the wind on my skin or hear the distant roar of the sea. All this beauty in the world had been lost to me for so long, wrapped in the darkness of my captivity.
With hasty, quiet steps, I hurry to the carriage, open the trunks, and quickly find what I’m looking for. The trousers and blouse—sewn by my own hands—await me like old allies. I immediately change in the shelter of the shadows. Wearing trousers gives me the freedom of movement I need. Skirts? Too dangerous, too constricting—a single misstep, and everything could be lost. But the world wouldn’t approve if a woman dared to act like a man.
But today, I am not concerned with what the world wants to see. Tonight belongs to me—and perhaps my life as well. Just as I am about to make my way toward the royal gardens, I hear loud footsteps in the distance. I immediately glance over my shoulder and duck into the carriage, waiting patiently, my breath shallow and my heartbeat pounding in my ears.
“The princess has vanished!” shouts a voice—the metallic clinking of his armor reveals him as a guard.
A second man responds hastily: “Do you think she’s been kidnapped?”
“Surely not!” the first one immediately contradicts. “Lord Louweris is currently being treated. They say she stabbed him in the eye with a needle!”
A horrified noise escapes from the second man, as if the mere thought makes him nauseous.
“Maybe she didn’t want this marriage?” the first soldier adds thoughtfully. “Perhaps all of this was arranged without her consent?”
“So what?” the other replies coolly. “She’s a princess—they’re not meant to rule! She should consider herself lucky that someone like Lord Louweris even set his sights on her. We must find her as quickly as possible! The Lord will generously reward whoever finds her!”
The footsteps slowly fade away, and in that moment, it hits me with shocking clarity: one of them was probably on the bridge, just a few meters above my head! These men were dangerously close to me—a wrong step, a quiet sound, and they would have discovered me immediately.
My heart pounds even harder as I dare to emerge from my hiding spot. I now realize how narrowly I have escaped danger—and how little time I have left. The path to the royal gardens feels heavier than I expected. Although it’s only a few meters, every step feels as though I’m being dragged through thick mud. My body and mind are working against me—as if they want to hold me back. Everyone here is on Lord Louweris’s side, this man who holds nothing but contempt for women, who ruthlessly forces a young girl like me into marriage. With every step, it becomes clearer: this place is not for me. My place is somewhere else—far away from this prison.
Sneaking toward the gardens feels like an eternity, as if time itself wanted to torment me. But finally, I reach them. Yet... nothing. No sign, no voice.
“But where is she?” I murmur, confused, standing before the high fence that prevents me from touching the water. “How beautiful the moon shimmers in the water...” The reflection of the moon is breathtaking—a fleeting moment of peace amid the chaos.
Exhausted and disheartened, I let myself sink to the ground. My hands cover my face, as if I could hide the pain of disappointment this way. I was so full of hope to finally learn who or what this mysterious voice is that called me here. But no one is waiting here. Was it all just a figment of my imagination? An illusion of my despair?
“VESPERA!” The voice, loud and menacing, pulls me out of my apathy. My heart races, and I glance over my shoulder. In an instant, I jump to my feet—right into the furious gaze of the king. His look burns with anger, his hands clenched into fists. Behind him stand the soldiers guarding the castle, each one who was nearby. They have all been summoned because of me. Is their fear of me truly that great?
“TRAITOR!” King Mukuta thunders, his voice rumbling like an approaching storm. “How dare you stab your husband in the eye with a needle? Princess Vespera Valdyris, I condemn you to death!”
They have found me. The queen must have known I would flee here. She knows the significance of this place for me; she knew it even back when she forbade me access to the gardens. What is my connection to this place? I do not know, but I have always felt peace here—a peace I have found nowhere else.
Perhaps... it wouldn’t be the worst thing to die in this place. I can hardly imagine a more beautiful end.
“Vespera, come to me!”