“Panpour, finish this! Scald!” The blue and cream monkey pokémon danced around the heavy form of his opponent, its skinny limbs providing him with rather athletic capabilities. A moment later a harsh hiss filled the air, as the panpour spat a stream of steaming water at his opponent.
His opponent, a mole-like pokémon with massive drill claws, screeched in pain, stumbling over itself and face-planting into the dusty ground.
“Excadrill is unconscious. Challenger Rosa is victorious!” A robotic voice rings out, high pitched and tinny, and the woman that Aidinza met earlier today, Rosa clearly, celebrates. She snatches Panpour up, spinning him around, and posing victoriously.
He watches for a few moments, as Clay approaches the victorious trainer, but the young nomad ends up turning away. Feeling slightly creepy staring at someone he mildly disliked being so happy.
Instead, he examined the field that the gym battle happened upon. It was large, much larger than Elesa’s battlefield, but more importantly to him, rather than being a tiled floor, it was proper ground. More of a dusty dirt field painted with stadium lines than the runway of Nimbasa.
It was something that Clay had used to his advantage, his excadrill specifically dug through it with incredible ease, seemingly faster underground than it was above ground. But more than that, the excadrill could send a tide of rock at his opponents, which was what ended up putting down Rosa’s Whirlipede.
The loose topsoil would be used to Aidinza’s advantage, he could already tell, well to be specific it could be used for Sandile’s advantage. It would probably be close enough to sand that Sandile would be able to use it for Sand Tomb. But that was a double-edged sword because clearly Clay’s pokémon were trained in its manipulation as well, and they were also very physically powerful pokémon. Astazhei would probably end up carrying the fight; while the rufflet was not as agile and quick as a traditional bird, he could still fly high above any ground-bound manipulation, and pick and choose whatever fight he cared to.
“Howdy there, you plannin’’ on sittin’ for the entire day, or are we gonna get to things?” Aidinza starts, as a drawling voice pulls him from his little strategizing session. He glances up and sees the large gym leader looming over him, a stern look framed by curly hair on his face.
“The sun sings for your health, honoured leader Clay.” The young nomad jumps to his feet, bowing before the older man, one hand pressing to the bottom of his neck. “I did not mean to waste your time.”
“One o’ them desert folk huh?” He snorts slightly and walks over to where he had been standing when he had been fighting Rosa. “You can make up for it by makin’ this a good fight.”
Slightly unsure if he was making up for potentially wasting the Honoured Leader’s time, or for being one of the Ya’an-ah, Aidinza walked over to where Rosa had previously been, the woman had left while he was distracted.
“How many pokémon you have there, boy?” The large man adjusts the gleaming bronze belt buckle holding up his two pairs of pants, before glancing at the watch on his wrist, as expensive, if not more so than Silt’s watch.
“Two, honoured leader.” The large man nods along at that, fingering one of the Pokéballs on his belt; one that he had not used against Rosa.
“This'll be a two on two battle! Standard league ruling applies, I’ll do you the respect of choosing first.'' Clay drawls out, and after a moment a robotic voice sounds out a very similar sentence.
“Show our hard-working spirit, Onix!” A flash of red fills the air, and with a mighty roar, more akin to rocks grinding together than anything natural, a massive stone pokémon is revealed.
Aidinza’s mouth goes dry, as he stares at the behemoth. It was akin to a snake, a chain of grey boulders that coiled around itself, a ‘smaller’ series of boulders acting as a tail that dug idly into the ground, displacing dirt easily. The thing’s head was the largest boulder, with a wide craggy mouth, set below a hard angled ‘nose’ and two white eyes, with tiny beady pupils. A tall horn jutted from the top of its head, and Aidinza was sure that if the creature extended to its full height, several metres tall at least, it would drag against the ceiling.
This was an Onix, and Aidinza knew that they were one of the largest pokémon in the world, and knew first-hand how terrifying they could be; the few that lived under the Ya’an-ah desert shook the earth with their passing unless they kept to the deepest of their tunnels.
And Aidinza knew that he did not have anything that could put it down. Their bodies were built to withstand the weight of the entire world. Pure physical force would meet the hard stone, and just bounce off. Astazhei for all his strength would be helpless against the massive creature. Sandile would maybe have a better chance with his sand manipulation, but sand agains-
“Challenger release your pokémon, or forfeit the battle.'' The robotic voice rings out again, and Aidinza throws Astazhei out in a panic. The rufflet appears with a piercing caw, taking to the skies, turning fierce eyes onto his opponent, regardless of its size. “The Battle begins in three, two, one. Begin!!”
“Onix, let's turn this fight into a right proper throw down!'' The grey snake roared again, the sound of stone on stone grinding against Aidinza’s ears, as the Onix’s tail dug into the ground, and flung a massive clump of earth at Astazhei.
“Astazhei dodge!” He was wasting his breath, Astazhei was a prideful bird, but he was in no way eager to be slammed by that amount of stone. Astazhei’s wings stilled, ceasing the powerful beats that held his burly form aloft, and dropped easily under the hurled rock. “Hone Claw! We’re going to need to really bulk up for this!”
“Put in the hard yards, Onix! Don’t let up.” The rock snake continues to fling rocks at Astazhei, as the rufflet continues dodging around them, throwing his body out of the way with powerful wing beats, even as he gathers power using Hone Claw. Aidinza watched on edge as Astazhei’s muscles began bulging, and the sound of his claws rasping together hanging in the air, almost sending a shiver down the young nomad’s back.
However, Astazhei would not have much longer to gather power, as already the Onix’s rocks were honing in on his flight. The burly bird was not agile, and the rock snake was figuring out its exact range of motion.
Aidinza had to pull the trigger.
“Astazhei, get in close and do as much damage as you can!” His order came, already knowing that there was little chance that Astazhei would properly put the powerful pokémon down. Astazhei for his part showed no sign of believing for a moment that he would not triumph here, rising into the air, and then diving towards his opponent, building up a brutal speed.
“Onix! If he’s gonna come right to you, then give him a propah west welcome.” Despite the fact that Clay did not order any specific move, Onix seemed to know exactly what its trainer wanted, a blueish energy building around its boulder-like head, as it angled itself towards the approaching bird.
“GO LOW!” The Nomad shouts, unsure what the Onix was doing, but knowing that it spelled nothing good for Astazhei. But the rufflet had committed to his descent already, and attempting to drag himself out of it was nearly impossible at this point.
So Astazhei did not even bother to try and abandon his dive, the flicker of a shell of energy sparks to life around him the moment before he slammed into the rock snake that was well over ten times his size. The noise of the impact rattled Aidinza’s teeth, and it was all he could do to not look away from the crash, sure that Astazhei would be injured by the brutal collision.
Aidinza watched, honestly shocked that not only was Astazhei not seriously injured by the collision but had sent Onix sprawling back, slamming it down into the ground causing dust to explode up into the air.
Slowly, the dust clears, revealing Astazhei hovering proudly in the air, wings powerfully beating, as he lets out a loud caw. For a moment Aidizna thought that the rufflet had triumphed over the Onix in one single, potent blow, a thought that almost seemed to bear out as the dust cleared, and Onix was revealed curled in on itself on the ground.
“That varmit’s got some strength on it, but that ain’t no excuse to slack off. Onix! Rock Throw!” Unfortunately, Clay’s voice dispelled that delusion, and immediately the rock snake snapped up, exposing a mound of rocks that it had seemingly raised from the ground. The snake uncoiled, spinning around, and throwing at Astazhei the rocks in a buckshot of earth.
Astazhei stood no chance, the rocks forming a large net that he was completely unable to get out of. The flying type was sent spiralling out of control towards the ground, and rather than letting him slam into the ground, Aidinza recalled his pokémon.
“Challenger’s Rufflet is unable to battle! Challenger must now release his second pokémon!” The robot voice announces, and Ya’an-ah lowered his hand to Sandile’s Pokéball. Astazhei had done some damage, he had to have done, considering the sheer amount of force he crashed into the rock snake. Sandile could take advantage of that, Aidinza told himself.
Sandile would make Astazhei’s first - and final - attack count.
A flash of red fills the field, and a moment later Sandile appears. The desert croc eyes his opponent wearily, glancing back towards Aidinza as if wondering what in the world his trainer was thinking.
“Sand Tomb!.” Aidinza does not waste any time, knowing that there were no real breaks in a fight, and not wanting to give any time for the Onix to recover. But already he was cursing himself, Sandile’s Sand Tomb was growing in strength, but it was nowhere near the point where he could trap something as massive as Onix. Though judging by the shaking sand on the ground, it was likely that Sandile was going to attempt it regardless.
“Now you’re bringin’ some heat there boy.” Clay gave Sandile an appreciative glance, and though Aidinza could not see exactly what he was looking at on Sandile's body, he clearly seemed pleased at the sight of the young desert croc. “Onix! Let’s stifle this heat, Head Smash!”
The massive rock pokémon roared, upper body hitting the floor and surging forward towards Sandile. In doing so, it gave Aidinza a golden opportunity.
“Target the Sand Tomb in front of the Onix!” Sandile might not be strong enough to fully trap Onix in a sand devil, but he was more than strong enough to whip something up to cut off the rock snake. Sandile wasted no time in changing his focus, turning his already gathered power from controlling enough sand to try to entomb the entire pokémon, to just creating a whirl of harsh sand right in front of it.
“Get out of there Onix!” Instantly the sand plumed up into the air, building into a miniature tornado that lashed at everything in its bound, and Onix having already built up speed and being far too large to easily change its momentum, smashed straight into the intense rotation, roaring, pained as the sand ground at the joints of its boulder-like sections. It was not enough to truly put down something as strong as an Onix, but as its joints were clogged with sand, it was clear that Sandile had done some serious damage and sent Onix writhing out of its charge.
“Hone Claw!” Aidinza wasted none of the time Sandile earned, twin growls filling the air as Sandiles claws rasped together, his muscles bulking up.
“You got a style and yer stickin’ to it, ain’t ya? Onix! Finish this hoedown with a Smack Down.” The massive rock snake, having pulled away from the Sand Tomb raging in front of it, roars, slamming its tail into the floor; two rocks tearing themselves up from the floor and beginning to glow with orange light.
Aidinza eyed the orange rocks wearily, if they were as fast as when Onix threw rocks, then Sandile would not be able to dodge the attack.
“Sand Tomb on its head!” Aidinza ordered, if Sandile was not able to dodge, then the only option was to disrupt the attack. Sandile wasted no time, and with the power of Hone Claw strengthening him, the Sand Tomb that he unleashed was far stronger, a raging near tornado that completely hid the Onix from view, causing the glow around one of the boulders to sputter out.
But the other did not, and a moment later it flung itself forward, slamming into Sandile’s braced form, heavy tears forming in the ground, as the desert croc dug his talons into the dirt. The blow was not truly telling, Sandile was a hardy reptile, but an attack from an Onix, even one not using its massive form, was not something to be easily shrugged off.
“Nice shootin Onix, now Dragon Breath, break that Sand Tomb!” Onix roars again, and a powerful flash of blue lights up the inside of the dust devil, breaking apart the whirling sand instantly, exposing a ground down Onix, most of its body held close to the ground.
“Flex on it!” Aidinza shouts, despite how the words made him feel slightly awkward, wondering if it was disrespectful to do so to an Honoured Leader.
“What in tarnation?” Clay looked visibly confused, staring for a moment at Aidinza in mild disbelief. Sandile flexed his powerful reptile body, before thundering forward, leaving deep gouges into the ground with his vicious claws as he did so; the power of Hone Claw visibly surged through him as he slammed into the Onix, sending the already exhausted beast backwards, collapsing on its back.
Despite his pokémon just being beat, Clay started laughing, a heady sound that bounced off the bronze-plated walls.
“Good job Sandile, you did it!” Aidinza grinned giving his starter a thumbs up as elation filled him. The three of them just took down something as massive as an Onix.
“Bwah!” Sandile turned to his trainer, and gave him a gummy grin, proudly jutting his head into the air, body beginning to bulge with the increased power of Moxie, as a red flash engulfed his defeated foe!
“Leader Clay’s Onix is unable to battle! Clay must now release his second pokémon.” The robot's voice fills the stadium once more; Aidinza and Sandile freeze, somehow the fact that this was a two versus two fight had escaped the trainer, with how massive Onix was.
“Heha hooo boy, that was a chuckle and a bit.” Clay wipes at his eyes for a moment, before his hand falls to his belt, picking out another Pokéball. “Yer a riot boy. Now let's see how you go against Baltoy!”
A small, floating pokémon appears, with tan skin painted with red stripes, emphasising its stomach with a circle, and rimming its closed eyes in an upside-down half moon. The pokémon itself had two arms jutting out on its side, arcing slightly in an almost drooping T-pose. It also had two spikes, one jutting up from its head, and one jutting down below it.
“Sand Tomb!” Aidinza blurts out, Sandile might be empowered by Hone Claw and Moxie, but he was weakened by the blow from the Smack Down and the levitating Baltoy wou-
The pokémon rose high in the air, easily avoiding the Sand Tomb’s viscous torque.
Would be able to avoid Sandile’s attacks with ease, Aidinza finishes his thoughts with a scowl.
“Ain’t much for it boy, Mudslap!” The crack of the pokémon's eyes glow with a red light, the shine lighting up the baltoy’s face with an ominous radiance, before a small section of the ground lifts up, and surges forward to slam into Sandile. “Now no need to extend this, Ancient pow-.”
Aidinza returns his pokémon, mind blank for any way he was going to be able to actually reach Baltoy, and unwilling to let Sandile just be hammered into over and over again in a helpless fight.
“The challenger has forfeited his pokémon! Gym Leader Clay is Victorious!” Aidinza blinked slowly, he had lost. It was not an insane idea to the Ya’an-ah, but… He knew that he would have to deal with losing at some point but…
But maybe knowing something intellectually was far different from experiencing it directly. A different sort of blank from winning against Elesa takes over him, as he stares at the Pokéball in his hand.
“You got two good pokémon there boy. But they’ve got weak points and you ain’t put in the hard yards to fix them.” Aidinza looked up at Clay’s condemnation, green eyes wide and shining with something unshed. “You sent out a bird type against an Onix, and don’t have no options for yer Sandile when he comes up against flyers.”
Aidinza hangs his head, staring at the spot where Sandile had dug in against the Smack Down. He did not know what Sandile could have done, but there had to be something. Something that he could teach him, or he should have not panicked and sent out Sandile first. Astazhei was tough, but it was a flying type up against an onix.
“If you don’t give it yer everything, yer letting them, and yourself down.” The gym leader’s voice was hard, but it was not cruel. He was telling how he thought it was, telling the young nomad what the gym leader thought he needed to hear.
He was right. Astazhei gave it his all despite Aidinza’s mistake of sending him out first, landing a brutal blow on a pokémon many times his strength and size. Sandile gave it his all, manipulating Sand Tomb in new ways that they had never practised before. While Aidinza… he let them both down.
“Thank you, Honoured Leader Clay.” Aidinza bows, hand pressing to the bottom of a tight throat, before he turns away and leaves in a daze.
Leaves into the bronze paved streets of Driftveil,
A loser.
-
He does not know what led his feet in this direction. Hardly understands how a coincidence like this could happen, but after handing his pokémon over to the nurse on duty at the Pokémon Centre, he wandered the streets of Driftveil in a mild haze, and found himself outside of a house he was half-convinced that he had never been told the address of.
A young ginger man, Kaine, stood out front, holding some sort of odd stick device against a patch of grass, the device cutting through the grass with ease. Sandile would like that, Aidinza noted, as he came to a stop at the gate.
“Oh hey there man, didn’t expect to see you today, you seemed a bit put off by my invitation.” Kaine waved cheerfully, shutting off the noisy stick in his hand and placing it down. Aidinza waves back absently and watches as the ginger walks over and unlatches the gate. “Come on in, man. You have the full run of the place.”
“You honour me.” Aidinza gives a half bow and walks through the gate robotically.
“Hey, you okay? You seem a bit out of it?” The ginger man gives Aidinza a concerned once over as he leaned against his fence. Aidinza was tempted to tell him nothing, to just bottle it all up.
“I lost against Honoured Leader Clay.” He says instead, not exactly an admission on just how lost he felt, but it felt like enough of one.
“Oh. Oh…” The man trails off, brow furrowing, before he walks over to his stick, and unplugs it, taking it over to his veranda. “This your first loss?”
“I haven’t been a trainer for very long.” Aidinza glances up to the sky, wondering for a moment why he was being so… evasive. Why he would not just come out and say things straight. He had already started opening up to this near stranger.
“Yeah that’s a sign, come on, I’ll fix you up something and we can talk. This is… something pretty common.” Aidinza nods, wandering into the house at his urging, and soon enough finds himself with a blanket over him on a couch, Kaine pushing a mug into his hands.
He glances around the room, as Kaine goes to fetch something else. It was a small living room, probably one of the smallest rooms that Aidinza had ever been inside, comparable more to a tent than what he associated with buildings. But something about it did not trigger his discomfort with being inside. Maybe it had to do with how decorated it was, with painted plates taking up much of the far wall, a colourful gallery of various first and second stage pokémon frolicking around. In front of Aidinza was a table, with a number of books and what he was pretty sure were board games stacked upon it, an old coaster with heavy coffee circles on it off to the side. Behind the large screen that took up much of the room were a variety of pictures of the ginger man. At the start he was young, but as the pictures went on he grew into the gangly boy you knew. He was cheerfully grinning in all of them, alongside a number of other men at what seemed to be the docks, alongside a number of burly pokémon. At times the scene changed, and at times some of the people in the scene changed, but the majority of them were nearly identical.
“That’s the dock crew.” Kaine’s voice interrupts his examination. A now-familiar cheerful grin on his face as he holds his own mug, softly blowing on it after a moment. “Pa used to be a worker, and they all but raised me after…” He stares at the wall for a moment, before shaking his head, and giving a half shrug. “I shouldn’t distract us. We’re talking to you.”
Aidinza hummed, half tempted to ask him to continue to talk, not exactly looking forward to examining the empty feeling inside him.
“It’s easy at the start.” Kaine starts suddenly, as he takes a seat on a plush chair. Aidinza eyes him, curious as to what he was going to say. “When you start out as a trainer. It’s real simple. You’ve got the gym circuit, you’ve got your starter. You probably win more than you lose, and those you lose you can explain away pretty easily.” He pauses, sipping at his mug. “You aren’t losing anything serious, and when you do have serious fights you win. It’s easy. You just get swept up in it.” He glances over at Aidinza, who was raptly listening. “How on the head am I?”
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Aidinza considers his words for a moment. It had been really simple, he even thought about it earlier today, right? Musing that all he had done since leaving the Ya’an-ah desert was play with his pokémon, train and fight.
Before losing, that seemed like such a sweet life. So easy.
“You’re pretty spot on.” Aidinza verbalises after a few seconds, and Kaine nods unsurprised.
“Then you lose for real. All that fun time and happy feeling stops. You learn the other side of it, that crushing feeling of defeat. You start thinking I wasn’t doing enough, I need to do more. Then you find yourself asking a question.” Blue, serious eyes stare at Aidinza as Kaine pauses for several long moments, and Aidinza feels like the next words were going to… change something. “Why do I want to put in that effort.”
There. That was the empty feeling verbalised. He realised he had let down his two pokémon, realised he was the one who needed to shape up. Needed to get serious, if he wanted to go far as a trainer.
And found curling up in his chest… the question of why. Why would he be giving up the carefree feeling? There was… there were some answers there. Because Sandile and Astazhei needed him to. Because he wanted to be a strong trainer.
But they felt slightly hollow, doing something for someone else, or chasing after something as absent as power.
It just did not have enough strength to convince him.
“I faced that question pretty early on. Had a rival, and lost pretty badly to him and realised I just didn’t have the drive needed, when I asked myself why I had no answer.” He shakes his head, looking reminiscent for a moment. “I let my starter head off with another friend, and made my way back to driftveil.” He gestures over to the wall as if telling Aidinza he had already seen what came next. “What you’re feeling right now, it’s natural. Normal. My friend faced it a few weeks after me, my rival faced it, halfway through the gym challenge. You’re not a bad person for feeling it.”
“I don’t want to stop being a trainer,” Aidinza speaks, after a long moment of silence, and that was true, right?
“Would just that be enough for your pokémon?” Kaine once more hits the nail on the head, and Aidinza slowly shakes his head. “They need something more from you.” The gangly man sips at his drink once more, and Aidinza for the first time copies him, the warm taste of something sweet filling his mouth. “You’re from Route Four right? From the desert?” Aidinza nods at the question. “Why did you leave?”
Aidinza mulls the question over, staring at the pictures on the wall, imagining what it would look like if it was him. He could already picture the long desert dunes, and the cool nights spent around the fire with his tribe. It was tempting. Why did he leave the desert? Was it just to follow in his sister's footsteps? Was it just the expectation to do so?
“I’m not sure.” He admits finally, staring down at the mug in his hand. Sandile’s appearance… Sandile's appearance could be explained easily. There were thousands of sandiles in the Ya’an-ah desert, if not tens of thousands. The chances that one would walk in on a ritual as noisy as the Ritual of the Sun were not insignificant.
And if he was chosen, then how was he so quickly shaken? He was a faithful man, but could his belief be comparable to the great heroes of Ya’an-ah? Could he even begin to compare his flickering candle, to the raging bonfire of faith akin to Bi At Ini?
“I…” He trails off. Maybe he should just stop now before he tricked himself into some sort of delusion of grandeur. “May-.”
“Before you come to a decision.” Kaine stops him, for the first time since this conversation looking unsure. “There’s a cave system north of the docks. It's not massive but… I think before you come to a decision you should check it out. Maybe end things on a high note, maybe figure out something to drive you.”
Aidinza swirls his mug for a moment, watching the dark liquid for a moment. There was a temptation to just say no, to not waste time on something that felt so decided already. But, for a moment he finds his mind turning to his sister. Gowteel always told him that nothing good came from giving up early.
One last try, he resolved. “Where… exactly is this cave?” He asks, and Kaine gives him a half-smile.
-
The docks smelled of sulphur, salt, and fish. That is to say, it smelt terrible to the nose of the desert nomad. This part of Driftveil was probably the closest in appearance to Nimbasa, with large concrete warehouses that loomed over the streets, blocking out the sun and creating an oppressive way.
It was as ever, uncomfortable for the desert nomad, but this time he was too caught in his own head to pay too much mind to it. His feet felt heavy, his head hanging. It felt almost final to him, as he walked on and on, following Kaine’s directions.
What was he going to say to Sandile and Astazhei? Would they understand? Would they know that it was better if he let them find their own path rather than with someone of such flighty conviction?
Were they already waiting to be released? So they could find someone of proper certitude? Aidinza traces one of the Pokéballs at his waist; Sandile’s Pokéball was cool against his fingers.
He pulls his hand away, glancing around the shaded streets, and continues on. He would talk to the two of them outside the cave system, he resolves to himself, and he continues onwards, slipping through warehouse alleys and slowly darkening streets.
It took him a little under half an hour to find the final dirt track to the cave, the trail snaking down the cliffs, to an incredibly thin strip of rock and sand. The cave was a crack in the earth, just slightly taller than Aidinza, and twice his width, the ground covered in wet sand.
Aidinza pauses just before the cave watching the flowing Seismahan. For a moment he felt something spark in his chest, watching the wonder of just so much water right in front of him. There was nothing like it in the Ya’an-ah desert. Save perhaps if he was to ascend to the very peaks of the Relic Castle, and attempt to see beyond the wastes to see this river from the other side.
He slowly breathes in, and out, calmly walking over to a nearby rock, sitting against it, and unclipping both his Pokéballs.
He examined both their red-white exteriors; they were so small. Even compared to their young occupants. Yet the entire world hinged upon them, even the Ya’an-ah had come to rely on these fantastical devices.
He snorts; he was dragging his feet, delaying things. He lets out Sandile first, a flash of red in the darkening evening, seeing the desert crocodile appear on the sand. Sandile examined the sand for a moment, gleefully dragging his claw through it, not minding its slightly damp composition. But he pauses and glances over at Aidinza, having noticed his trainer's melancholy.
“Bwuh?” The ground-types keen, dark eyes watched Aidinza for a moment, glittering with concern, but all Aidinza managed was a wan smile. Sandile was not satisfied with that. He drew closer, nestling into his trainer’s side, snout coming to rest against his chest, as his eyes turned soulful.
Aidinza glanced away and released Astazhei. The rufflet, seemingly sharing his trainer’s depression, did not let out a mighty caw as he usually did, instead just fluttering down to the sand, and kicking at it.
For a moment, the sight of the lethargic bird stole Aidinza’s words, and he just stared at his second pokémon. How would the rufflet react to being told that Aidinza had let him down? That they had lost, and it was Aidinza’s fault? Angry? Dismissive? Disappointed?
“We lost.” He croaks out after a long moment of paralysis. Sandile blinked up at him, a low, soft noise building up in the reptile's throat. Astazhei on the other hand has a far more intense reaction, and not in the way that the young nomad expected.
The bird burst into tears, his large black iris’s disappearing behind his eyelids as thick tears welled at the corners of his eyes. The strong-bodied flying type began wildly fluttering around in a tear-filled tantrum.
“A-Astazhei!” Aidinza stuttered, not expecting the sudden outburst from the bird. Astazhei, hearing his trainer's voice, slumped down pounding at the sand with his wings, whipping up a great gust. “Astazhei!” He tries more firmly, and this time the flying-type pauses in his tantrum, opening his white pupiled eyes to stare shamefaced at his trainer. “I know you’re upset.” The rufflet cooed sadly, slumping down further as tears continued to flow. Aidinza gestures for him to come closer, gathering him up against his side, opposite where Sandile was still staring up at him.
Aidinza runs his left hand through Astazhei’s soft downy feathers, until the flying type stops crying, closing his big eyes and just relaxing into his side. With his right hand, he traced the rougher scales of Sandile. There was a temptation in him to just stay like that forever, to just stay here watching the water of Seismahan river as the sun drifted below the horizon, kept warm by his pokémon.
But that was not fair to them, he convinced himself. They had a right to know, they had as much investment in this as he did, if not more than him.
“You’re right to be upset.” He breaks the quiet, speaking over the sound of rushing water. “I let the two of you down.” The admission drove him to close his eyes, as he felt his pokémon shift against his side. “I didn’t… I haven’t put in what you needed me to put in.” He swallows a lump in his throat, feeling something prickle at the corner of his eyes. He did not want to say what came next. But he needed to say it, right? They needed to know. “I’m not sure I have what it takes to give you what you need to succeed. I’m not sure I can be a good trainer for you.”
There. It was out in the open. He cracked open his eyes, seeing Sandile sadly watching him, from where the croc’s snout was still resting against his chest. He glances over to Astazhei and sees the rufflet had pulled away, keen eyes shadowed in the dusk light.
Aidinza took in one more shuddering breath, with one more thing that needed to be said. He stares out into the glittering river and tries to come to terms with it.
“I’m not sure… I might not be a trainer tomorrow. I’m sorry.” Silence reigned, the words ‘I might not be your trainer’ he finds himself briefly unable to say. Aidinza, and Sandile were motionless in the wake of the declaration but Aidinza feels Astazhei shift, and make a low whistle. He swallows. “I might not be your tra-” Before he could finish he finds himself interrupted by a keening caw, and Aidinza finds himself buffeted by wind.
He bites down on his lip, and lets his head fall back against the rock, tracing Astazhei’s ascending form as he flies high into the air, and then away. His heart clenches, and this time he cannot stop the tears that slide down his face.
Sandile’s claws lightly pressed into his chest, as the desert croc climbed up Aidinza’s body, getting as close as possible to his face. Soulful reptilian eyes stared at him, before Sandile rocked forward, booping his snout into Aidinza’s tear-stained cheek. “Bwah.” The sound pulls a weak, shuddering smile from Aidinza as he scratches just behind the pokémon’s eye ridge, his favourite spot.
“I wanted to explore the cave here before I made the final choice.” He glances towards where the crack in the earth was, patting at the torch he had bought by his side. When he turned back to Sandile, his starter was giving him a gummy grin, but Aidinza could tell that it was off. “Come on.” He whispers hoarsely, and Sandile climbs off him.
He stands up and walks into the cave, Sandile following close behind him. The inside of the cave system was smooth stone walls, and though he knew little about caves even he could tell they were not carved out by humans. Maybe pokémon, using their power over the earth? Maybe once upon a time, it was a duranthill. Whatever the source, it formed a labyrinth of interlocking and twisting tunnels.
Aidinza let himself get lost in the markless tunnels, Sandile on his tail as they moved through the wet sand. There were pokémon here, but few stuck around long at the sight of Sandile, and those might be the opponents of some of Aidinza’s last fights.
It felt like hours passed as he simply explored, there was an almost familiarity to it. More than once the Naisho’h had taken shelter from the raging of their mother desert inside the caves that dotted her dunes. Though those were far more craggy, than the smooth stone of this place, he mused to himself, as he let his left hand trail over the walls.
It was as he was doing this, that the cave system widened up into a large cavern, half of it dominated by a large pool of clear water. He walks over to it, staring at his reflection in the water for a moment before he sees past that, several water pokémon lounging at the bottom. He examines them for a moment, noticing a few he recognised, Tympole, the first stage of Seismitoad, was easy to identify, there existed a few colonies of the line along the few rivers in the Ya’an-ah desert.
So were Basculin, the green and black pokémon being the focal point of many Ya’an-ah legends. Of a man who died thrice, as the man attempted to calm the endless war between red and blue striped Basculin.
However, there were many others that he did not recognise; a round, white and blue pokémon with a peculiar black spiral marking its chest was one. A predominantly orange fish with long whiskers was another, a particularly dumb species if Aidinza had to judge, considering it kept bumping against the wall.
“Oh, hello there!” A soft, feminine voice calls out behind Aidinza, startling him out of his examination. He whirled around, Sandile moving in front of him defensively. But it was just a human.
A strangely garbed woman. She had what he could only really describe as a tunic, over the top of a tighter black garment, the tunic white and grey with a coif like hoodie held together with a black X. She had tall boots on and oddly large stiff gloves, and on the centre of her tunic was an emblem, a shield half black, half white, with a stylized P intertwined with a z in the centre.
The woman herself was a ginger, a few shades lighter than Kaine, with cheerful blue eyes, and dimpled cheeks from a kind smile. She shifted slightly, and Aidinza was pretty sure he heard the clink of actual metal.
“Cool sands and wet winds, stranger.” He greets back, unsure at the appearance of another person. Then again, Kaine never said that this place was particularly private, or unknown.
“Plenty of that here.” Her smile widens, eyes closing for a moment as she giggles at her joke, and Aidinza finds himself cracking his own smile. The sand underneath them was cool, and the draft in the air hung heavy with damp. “I’m Jamie! Nice to meet you.”
She sticks a hand out, and Aidinza cautiously takes it; he had seen people do this hand grasp more than once, and its intricacies escaped him. So he resolved to carefully watch Jamie to see when he was supposed to let go. “Aidinza. Same?”
He quickly found his careful examination of her body language interrupted by a giggle. “Eye’s up here silly.” Her voice was teasing, but there was a note of chastisement that Aidinza hastened to obey, snapping up from where he was staring at her elbow. But not before he noticed something odd.
“You don’t have any Pokéballs?” That seemed… ill-advised to Aidinza, this cave, while not particularly dangerous, still had a number of aggressive pokémon.
“Oh, uh yeah! I don’t believe in them!” The way she said it made it seem like she thought it was the most natural idea in the world, yet Aidinza found himself taken aback. Did not believe in Pokéballs? Was she… crazy?
With a careful eye on her, he lowers his hand to his belt and unclips Sandile’s Pokeball. Before lifting it up to her field of view, and after a moment of deliberation, returned Sandile, as direct a demonstration of a Pokéball as he could think of.
After the flash of red light, Aidinza watched Jaime carefully, finger hovering over the release for if she proved truly deranged. But all that happened was Jaime trying to stop a giggle, before she descended into full-blown belly laughter, collapsing onto her butt as she held her stomach and gasped for breath between guffaws.
Aidinza pointedly did not move his finger from the release of the Pokéball.
“Y-you thought I mean I didn’t think they were r-real?” She gasps out between laughter, tears welling up in her eyes as she laughed so hard. Aidinza watched confused, what else could she have meant by saying she did not believe in them. Clearly, the confused look on his face was amusing, since it set her off again, slamming a glove clad hand into the ground as she rolled about. “I’m going to pee myself. Fuck.”
After a long - very long - bout of laughter, Jaime finally recovers, pushing herself up so she was sitting, and cradling her ribs. “Ah, you’re a riot Aidinza.” She snorts, and for a moment it seemed like she would descend into more laughter before she schooled herself. “I didn’t mean I didn’t think they’re real, I don’t believe in using them.”
That made a bit more sense than denying their existence to Aidinza, but he was still leery at the idea. “Why? They’re very useful.”
She seemed pleased by the question, her smile turning from merry to joyful as she leapt to her feet.
“It’s about trust!” She, for some reason, pointed toward the cave's roof at that, and Aidinza followed her gesture to see nothing but smooth stone. She giggled again, and Aidinza wondered if he should just stop trusting anything she said. “I believe that Pokéballs prevent trainers from trusting their pokémon!”
Aidinza kept his finger hovering over the release of Sandile’s Pokéball, and glanced around the cave, looking for if there was anyone else there.
“You look like you think I’m crazy.” She spins a finger around her temple, before jabbing a finger into her cheek, the plush flesh distorting around it. “But I’ve got really good reasons! Wanna hear them?”
“Okay.” Jamie beamed at the response, before rocking on her feet and tapping at her lips, clearly thinking.
“Well. Like I said, it has to do with trust.” She moves away from Aidinza, wandering over to the water, tugging off her gloves and dipping her hand into the water. “Trainers… they go their entire lives with their Pokéballs always at the ready, prepared to trap away their pokémon at the slightest provocation. Unable to trust them without their back up.” She shakes her head sadly, as she stares into the clear water, looking like she thought that was the most tragic thing in the world. “Why can’t they learn to just let go of their fear?” She looks back at Aidinza with wide blue eyes, and he finds himself genuinely moved to answer.
“The desert is a harsh mother. She is dry and rough, with a cruel temper. The Ya’an-ah know this. Yet we also know she will provide water from the Oasis and shelter from the worst of her storms.” Aidinza pauses for a moment, then joins the woman crouching at the edge of the water, staring deep into it. “It is not that we do not trust the desert when we prepare water tanks and tents. It is that we know the desert, and trust what we know.”
“So you think that pokémon are dangerous? Do you have to prepare for that?” She challenges, her blue eyes flashing with indignance. Aidinza for a moment is tempted to say yes, that no matter how docile a pokémon could be, they could be roused to terrible anger. But he finds his mind turning to his team, to Sandile and… and Astazhei, could he really say that he would think they would turn violent? Could he even bring himself to properly think about it?
No, he could not, so he fell silent, just watching the natural aquarium before him.
“It’s when Humans and pokémon trust each other… when they really have faith in each other, something beautiful forms.” Aidinza gives careful thought to her words, rolling them around in his head and examining them. He hears the woman rise once more, the clink of metal just reaching his ears before she patted his shoulder. “I hope you see the truth.”
She walks away, leaving Aidinza alone to continue staring down into the water. Trusting his pokémon…. He did, right? Except, had he proved that? In the battle against Clay, not only had he let them down by not planning better but had he also not trusted Sandile, not believing him able to overcome the Baltoy.
He did not have faith.
Faith… Aidinza considered himself a faithful man. He opened his heart and his soul during the rituals of the Ya’an-ah, he held the existence and the glory of the sun to be self-evident. He knew the stories, he knew their tales. He knew their meanings. He knew the signs, and he had resolved to himself his entire life that if he was called upon he would not falter.
Yet here he was, faltering. It took him only a few weeks away from the Sand and Sun to do so. Falter in what his people called a sign, and faltered in being a trainer.
A splash of water and a surfacing pokémon distracted him for a moment. Its body was made up of red segmented plates ending in white lines, leading from a smooth red mandibled face with two large white antennae, all the way down to two white, rectangular fins for its tail.
It had three pairs of black legs with two ending in long plated red tips. The foremost pair of legs were larger, and the right one was even larger still. The left one formed a jagged, many-pointed end, while the right was a large pincer with a red claw, both rimmed by the same white lines of the body plates.
Perhaps most striking were its eyes, pure blue, with small beady black pupils half-hidden by red eyelids, set on the side of its head, that lazily glanced around the cavern, before its attention landed on Aidinza as he observed it. There was a terribly tense moment as the two of them watched each other, the red, almost bug-like pokémon’s eyes flicking between Aidinza’s hand and his face, its larger claw rising slightly.
He was still holding his Pokéball, he realised. That was… good. Aidizna would definitely need it if this went bad. Though judging by the way the carapaced pokémon’s attention flicked to his Pokéball, it might know the danger it posed to it. Preparing its own response.
It seemed that he was in a standoff, a dangerous one considering how close the pokémon was, and how strong and large its claw looked. Would he even have time to release Sandile, before the pokémon got to him? It was clearly just as wary of him as he was of it, probably having some experience with trainers before. A bad experience if the way it was watching him could be trusted. Maybe he should throw himse-
The pokémon lowered its claw, with a placid blink, its eyes still examining Aidinza, as he breathed out carefully. It seemed that the pokémon had decided to extend a measure of trust towards the Ya’an-ah boy.
To put faith in him not attacking. Aidizna lowered Sandile’s Pokéball, clipping the device to his belt as he watched the six-limbed pokémon. Today seemed to revolve around faith and trust, and once more he proved himself recalcitrant to extend it. Was it another test? One final trial that he had just failed to overcome?
Aidinza snorts, as he sits down, letting his feet dip into the water, his shoes having already been soaked through in the soggy tunnel anyway. He felt exhausted, the day had exhausted him. It had just kept coming and coming. An endless parade of what he could only see as mistakes. Out of the corner of his eyes, he spies the pokémon approaching, its back legs skittering on the sandy ground, and two claws held from dragging by the bare minimum of effort.
It sets itself up next to Aidinza, lowering its body into the sand, its head hanging over the edge, mandibles just touching the water. Now that the tense moment had passed, it seemed like it felt rather relaxed in his presence.
“The funny thing about faith is you always think you have it before you find it tested.” Who knows what possessed him to start talking, to something that more likely than not had no real way to reply. “It seems so simple when you don’t have to think about it. But the moment you start to second guess things… it suddenly gets a whole lot more difficult to just trust. You know what I mean?”
The Pokéturns its placid eyes towards him, and for a moment he thought that was all it would do, before it straightened up, and turned, showing off its left claw as it shook it. Now he had a better look at it, he could see that the jagged end was not natural, the claw not closing properly, and looking almost… smashed apart, and on the grey of the limb was a large healed scar.
“Someone did that to you.” The red pokémon turned back to the water, dipping its mandibles in again, and nodded. “Was it a human?” A single eye flicks over to him and nods again. Abuse then, he realised with a start, or maybe this pokémon’s claw was valuable and someone tried to take it. “Surprised you lowered your claw.” He’s not sure he would, in this pokémon’s shoes, having grown up among the Sandile, who had taught the Naisho’h a longer memory than most.
Aidinza watched as the pokémon shrugged, lowering its claw into the water and playing with it. He marvelled at the casual display of trust. It just…
Trusted.
“I could be dangerous, trying to get you to lower your guard.” Another sideways look, that seemed to pierce into his soul, its half-lidded eyes surprisingly keen. It shrugged again, spurting a bit of water out, and turned to watch the ripples. Aidinza chuckled. “What do you lose by playing it safe?” He found himself asking, staring into the rippling, though he suspected he knew the answer already. A moment later he feels a splash of water against his face, and he turns to see that the pokémon had leaned over to point its large claw at him. “That’s pretty rude.”
The pokémon twittered, its eyes opening slightly in a chastisement that Aidinza could only take as ‘that was the point’. It would have been rude, heck it would have meant that this conversation would not have happened. This pokémon, no matter his reasons for being justified in being aggressive, simply did not want to be. Did not want to be the sort of pokémon that would attack first.
By the glorious Sun, was it really that simple? Was he just trying to make something complex when it did not have to be? Was his miserable walk this entire time pointless, this self-doubt pointless?
Yes.
He snorts, yes it fucking was. A grin crossed his face, it was that simple. He wanted to be a trainer, he wanted to be faithful, and he wanted to put in the effort, so why did he not become that person?
“Thank you.” He beamed, and without thinking he reached out to pat the pokémon, hand rubbing against hard keratin plating. The pokémon twittered again, its antenna shifting and producing a squeaking noise before it leaned into the touch. After a moment of companionable silence, while Aidinza traced the ridges and edges of the pokémon’s body, finding occasional soft flesh to massage, a temptation filled the young Ya’an-ah. “Do you want to come on my journey? You don’t have to if you don’t want to, but I would appreciate it, and I’d make sure to treat you properly, and train you properly…”
Aidinza glances down to his side as he rambled, seeing a placid yellow eye staring up at him, before it taps a large claw into one of the Pokéballs, and disappears in a red flash.
That answered that, he supposed, as he touched a hand to the cool metal of the near-perfectly still Pokéball. He gets to his feet, glancing around the cool cavern. It was about time to head off.
There’s another flash of red, and Sandile appears by his side. He grins down at the desert croc, who seemed confused by the difference in his trainer. It made sense, it was a stark difference; gone was the listless man who had stumbled through the cave tunnels like a man walking towards a death sentence. Gone was the weak posture, and hung head. But maybe even more than that was the difference between this Aidinza and the Aidinza of this morning, the one that saw Driftveil bridge, and fought against Rosa. That Aidinza had been lively but unsure, following the current of life without any resistance or real cause.
This Aidinza stood with his head high, and purpose in his movement. A drive in his green eyes, found from the simple understanding that if this was what he wanted, then he simply had to be that.
It seemed to be a good difference in Sandile’s eyes, as he smiled gummily, and wandered behind his trainer cheerfully. He seemed to be fully enjoying the sandy tunnels for the first time, digging into the soaked sand, and popping out at random intervals. Seemingly not minding in the slightest the wet.
The atmosphere was simply far more joyous than it had been an hour ago, and Aidinza, now firm in his understanding that while the path before him remained murky he still wanted to be the kind of person to walk it, smiles with new conviction.
-
It had taken the two of them twenty or so minutes to wander out of the cave, the twisted tunnels and pathways were not so labyrinthine now that he was out of his rut. As he walked down the cave's entrance, he noticed that the water had risen, submerging his ankles as he waded through it.
He pauses as he breaches the open air, the sun having long since fallen below the horizon, a field of stars above him and a full moon shining off the river Seismahan. Aidinza watched the sky for a long moment, hand falling to his side, to trace a currently empty Pokéball. It only takes him a moment to come to a choice, and despite the rising water - that Sandile was cheerfully playing in, he wandered over to a nearby rock and sat down.
“Oh hey again.” He glances up, and see’s Jaime standing there, still in her strange knight costume marked with the symbol of the P and Z intertwined, a large sack slung over her shoulder.
“Cool sands and wet winds, Jaime.” He greets, gracing her with a half smile, before looking up to the skies, waiting.
“You’re looking a sight more cheerful, the caves clear your head?” She bounced over to her own rock, sitting down and drawing her legs up to her chest, the sack being placed on its own rock.
“Something like that.” He hears Sandile splash by him, and scoops up the desert croc, to scratch at his wet scales absently, to rumbled approval. “Met a pokémon who just made sense.”
He hears Jaime giggle. “And you thought I was crazy.” His brow furrows for a moment, remembering her Pokéball speech, but shrugs it off, going to watch the sky once more. “You probably shouldn’t stay out here for the whole night, the Seismitoads upstream will probably decide to knock over the Bibarel dams at some point in the night, and that makes a big wave!” She slaps the water in an apparent demonstration, the water flicking everywhere. But Aidinza was already soaked at this point and paid it no mind.
“Got a pokémon I need to wait for.” Astazhei would come back; they had not known each other long, but he felt it in his bones. He runs his hand down Sandile’s drying body, brow furrowing briefly when he finds the desert croc’s tail still soaked.
“Did you release them?” She questions and her voice is intent and interested. He glances over at her, finding that her blue eyes were much the same, shining brilliantly in the light of the moon.
“Not quite. Just said the wrong thing, at the wrong time, in the wrong mind.” Her brow furrows for a moment, seemingly deliberating something for a moment, as a finger scratches at her pale skin.
“Maybe it would be better if you did?” That was not what he expected her to say at all. His good mood flickers and stills and he turns hard green eyes on her. “Well if it’s not here, and you hurt it… maybe it would be better if you released them? That way you aren’t putting yourself in danger of the Seismahan flooding, and your pokémon is released!”
She beams at that as if what she had said was a perfect storybook ending, her soft face lighting up under the moonlight. Aidinza felt something foul curl up in his gut, a terrible feeling scraping at his good mood and newfound conviction before he discarded it. Tore it up in his mind and burnt it up in the flames of the sun.
“No. It would not be better if I did that.” His voice was as frigid as the cold night air that flowed over his wet body, and at his voice, Jaime finally seemed to notice the glare he had levelled at her.
“Jeez, it’s just an idea.” She flicks her ginger hair, and as the tense silence continues, finally stands up and brushes herself off. “I should probably go.”
Aidinza turns away from her, looking towards the sky once more. Waiting for Astazhei to come back.
Forty-two minutes later, with the water level rising so much that the Ya’an-ah returned Sandile, a figure broke the light of the moon for a moment.
His waning attention, worn by the exhaustion of the day and the desire for sleep, snapped back into focus and he looked up at the night sky, hearing the powerful wing beats of Astazhei before seeing his powerful form. With a tremendous cry, the flying type swooped down, wind breaking and water shuddering in his wake, as he landed heavily on Aidinza’s knee.
In his powerful beak was clutched a peculiar pink berry, with a knotted crevasse giving it a rather strange surface. He jerked the branch at his trainer with surprising urgency, stopping just short of shoving the berry into his mouth.
Aidinza takes the berry for a moment, and examines it, unsure if it was actually an edible one. Many, despite their fantastical properties for pokémon, did not react well with humans.
He puts it away, despite Astazhei’s protests, and pulls the bird into a hug, running his hands through his soft downy feathers. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just needed to figure some stuff out.” Carefully Aidinza breathes in, still stroking his flying type. “If it's okay for you, I still want to be your Trainer.”
Astazhei looks up at him with wide white pupiled eyes, as they gleam with wetness. He bursts into tears, and buries his face into his trainer's chest, wings flaring out to wrap around Aidinza in a rendition of his own hug. The two of them stay there for a long moment, Aidinza just letting Astazhei get everything out, delighting in the fact that he came back, and wanted to stay.
Unfortunately, the moment could not last forever, and as the water raised high enough to submerge half his stomach, Aidinza realised it was definitely time to go.
He glances towards the pathway winding up the cliff. He’d get back to the Pokécentre, and learn what his new pokémon was, introduce him to the team and then…
Then it was try two for the Driftveil Gym.
A wide grin crossed his face, as he stood up, wading through the water as Astazhei took to the skies above him with a cry.
This time, the outcome was going to be different.