At the end of the day, after grinding through another forgettable work, North had a strange hobby—torturing NPCs and players just for fun. It wasn’t a job. It wasn’t a side hustle. It wasn’t even something he did for recognition. It was just something that made him laugh after a long, boring day.
Some people relaxed with TV. Others played normal games.
North? He turned his private Fantasy Simulator server into a madhouse of suffering, tweaking its broken rules to trap, confuse, and destroy anything inside. NPCs flailed against illogical mechanics. Players cursed, screamed, and rage-quit. And North? He laughed.
The glow of three monitors flickered against the walls of his cluttered apartment. A half-empty energy drink sat next to his keyboard, condensation pooling on the desk. The room smelled faintly of instant noodles and overworked electronics.
North stretched his fingers and cracked his knuckles. Then, with a satisfied and happy smile, he booted up his masterpiece.
☯[WELCOME TO FANTASY SIMULATOR]☯
[Server: Peace is A LIE #431]
[Administrator: North]
The world loaded—not just any world, but the most hellishly broken power simulator ever devised. A world where he had twisted the game’s logic to the breaking point, where NPCs developed existential crises, and where players suffered purely for his amusement.
A chuckle rumbled in his throat.
"Let's see what we've got today."
A mountain monastery was burning to the ground.
A peerless Jade Beauty was escaping her 112th forced marriage attempt.
A town’s entire population was locked in an endless philosophical debate with a daoist of unknown origin about whether rocks had souls, unable to function.
And above all of this, North sat like a god, adjusting the settings, pushing reality to its limits.
----------------------------------------
A sky split in half.
Lightning crackled as two supreme Visionaries floated in mid-air, their robes billowing dramatically, their eyes burning with heaven shaking rage. Beneath them, an entire mortal empire cowered, watching in horror as the very laws of reality threatened to collapse.
And all over…
A single piece of long forgone Inheritance.
"Xu Ling!" roared Grand Elder Tianbao, his voice shaking the heavens. "Hand over the Blood Ancestor Inheritance, and I shall grant you a swift death!"
His opponent, Sect Master Xu Ling, clutched the glowing blood crystal in his palm, eyes blazing with madness. "Fool! If you were worthy, the inheritance would have chosen you! Prepare to die!"
The air trembled as both unleashed divine techniques at once.
* A 10,000-mile-long sword slash ripped through the clouds.
* A meteor storm rained down, obliterating entire cities.
* Somewhere in the distance, a random chicken ascended to godhood from exposure to the raw energy.
The long lost blood inheritance, meanwhile, remained completely untouched, floating in Xu Ling’s grasp.
North leaned forward, sipping his drink. The chances of getting a genuine blood inheritance was one in thousands, he had programmed it such and most of these inheritrices' were fake and spread about by a con Visionary to earn money and level up his art. But, the players didn’t know that. And the NPC logic? It had decided that this blood inheritance was real and the most valuable object in existence.
Below, a mortal farmer clutched his wife in terror.
"First it was the Great War of the Heaven-Going Blind… then the Tragedy of the Divine Egg… and now—now it’s fucking inheritance?!" he sobbed. "Why is life like this?!"
His wife had already passed out from spiritual pressure, mumbling about how she should have married that mortal accountant instead, living next door.
[System Message: The Heavenly Blood Inheritance has revealed itself and War has escalated. All Middle Plains major sects now declare war.]
North grinned. "That should keep them occupied for the next hundred or so in-game years."
----------------------------------------
With a click, he switched to Player #827198's perspective.
The poor bastard was named 'xXDragonLordXx.'
And he was surrounded. Not by monsters. Not by enemies. By plotlines.
A hundred sect leaders, divine beings, mysterious masked figures, and childhood friends all stood in a circle around him, each demanding his attention.
"xXDragonLord420Xx," boomed Sect Leader Bai, "you are the lost heir to our sacred legacy!"
"Nonsense!" shouted the Demon Lord. "He is MY reincarnated son! He shall lead my armies!"
"Impossible, he's clearly MY long-lost son's teacher's..."
xXDragonLordXx took one step back. His hands trembled over his keyboard.
[Player Chat] xXDragonLordXx: "WTF IS THIS? WHY DO I HAVE 52 QUEST MARKERS?!"
North chuckled and typed a single command.
[System Message: Player has awakened the "Dao of Bullsh*t." All words spoken now become self-fulfilling prophecies.]
xXDragonLordXx panicked. "I… I just want to be left alone!" he shouted out loud.
[System Message: Confirmed. Player has awakened the "Dao of Loneliness." From this moment, all allies and loved ones will tragically die or abandon him.]
The Jade Beauties gasped—then turned and ran.
His sect immediately disowned him.
The Demon Lord sighed. "A shame. I wanted a son, but it seems you are destined to be alone forever."
xXDragonLordXx collapsed to his knees.
[Player Chat] xXDragonLordXx: "WHAT KIND OF BULSHIT ASS PERSON IS RUNNING THIS SERVER."
The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there.
North wiped away a tear of laughter.
"Oh, man. I love this game."
----------------------------------------
With a click, he swapped to another scene—inside the great city of Golden Sunspire, a level 1 player was desperately trying to assassinate an old man in a famous inn.
But, this was no ordinary NPC.
It was Old Man Wei, the one and only secret Quest Giver in the world.
The poor player, a fresh-faced rogue, had mistakenly thought Old Man Wei was just another generic old man. He had no idea that North had given this quest giver NPCs absolute immortality to prevent young masters speedrunning exploits.
The rogue stabbed the old man in the chest. Nothing happened.
He tried again. Critical hit. Again, no damage.
Old Man Wei sighed. "Young master, which clan are you from? Are you perhaps lost? I need help with something. If you help me I'll offer you good reward."
The player went berserk, spamming abilities, throwing grenades, even attempting to glitch the game by wedging the NPC into a wall.
Nothing.
Then, North’s custom failsafe was triggered.
"If a player attacks a Quest NPC for more than 30 seconds…"
Suddenly, a bolt of thunder flashed across the sky before smacking down upon the angry player. The rogue instantly exploded into loot.
A system message popped up:
[System Warning: You have been eliminated by Quest Master Wei. Your account is now flagged for review.]
North cackled as the rogue rage-typed in global chat.
[Player "DeathReaper69"]: WTF!!! THIS SIMULATOR IS RIGGED
----------------------------------------
The scene opened in the Celestial Peak Sect, where Young Master Lin was pursuing what appeared to be the most stunning jade beauty he'd ever encountered. Her skin was like jade, her eyes like autumn waters, her figure so perfect it could topple nations—everything a proper cultivation novel demanded.
"Fair maiden," Young Master Lin called out, frantically chasing after her floating silk robes. "Please, wait! I must know your name!"
The jade beauty paused, holding a delicate sleeve to her lips as she giggled musically.
[System Notice: Player LegendaryChad89 has activated "Pursuit of Beauty" quest line]
Young Master Lin finally caught up, dropping to one knee. "I am Chen Tianxing of the Divine Sun Peak! Your beauty has captured my heart, and I—"
The jade beauty turned around fully.
"Oh my," said a distinctly masculine voice. "Another one?"
Young Master Chen's eyes bulged. The perfect jade beauty still stood there, but now he could also see... a muscular brother with a magnificent sword between his legs. Both images overlapped, creating a reality-breaking paradox.
[System Notice: Player LegendaryChad89's "Dao Heart" has received critical damage]
"I am Big Sword Wang, senior brother of the Long Iron Peak," the jade beauty-but-also-not said cheerfully. "I've been trying to tell everyone, but people keep throwing engagement rings at me and challenging each other to duels over my hand in marriage."
Young Master Chen's world shattered. "But... but the delicate fragrances! The floating silks! The devastating beauty!"
"Oh, that?" Big Sword Wang flexed, his massive biceps somehow creating the same ethereal sparkles usually reserved for jade beauties. "Side effects from my failed attempt at the 'Yin & Yang Purity Body Refinement Technique.' Now everyone either sees me as the most beautiful woman or the most handsome man. Sometimes both. It's been really awkward at sect meetings."
In the distance, another young master spotted them and immediately began racing over, love-struck.
"Not again," Brother Big Sword Wang sighed, his perfect jade beauty form and masculinity still flickering back and forth. "Look, if you're going to have a cultivation deviation over this, could you do it quietly? I have forty-seven marriage proposals to reject by sunset."
Young Master Chen had already collapsed, his worldview in shambles.
[System Notice: Player LegendaryChad89 has gained title "Seeker of Awkward Truths"]
[System Notice: Player LegendaryChad89 has lost "Young Master's Confidence"]
[System Notice: Player LegendaryChad89 is now questioning his gender]
...
"Now that's art," North murmured, reaching for his energy drink. His fingers never made it.
"Maybe I should add a marriage competition arc," He mused, opening his scenario editor. "Nothing like a hundred young masters fighting over a bride only to realize they're actually fighting over the sect's most muscular senior brother."
----------------------------------------
As North prepared to trigger another scenario—perhaps one where a divine pig accidentally becomes ruler of an immortal empire—something unexpected happened.
A system prompt flickered on his screen, one he had never seen before.
ERROR: SYSTEM ADMINISTRATOR DETECTED A DISCREPANCY IN PLAYER CONTROL.
Recalibrating User Experience...
Processing Customization...
Loading Full Immersion Mode...
North narrowed his eyes.
"What the hell?"
Before he could react, the screen flashed white.
"Wait," His eyes widened as his chair began to dissolve. "Wait, wait, wait—"
The sound of thunder cracked through his room, the smell of burning ozone filled his lungs. His body felt weightless, his chair vanishing beneath him as his vision warped.
Then—
He felt hard, sticky, and dirty floor beneath his fingers. A hot smell inundated his nose. The roar of random Visionaries battling over nonsense inside the inn. North’s eyes snapped open. He was no longer in his room. He seemed to have entered an entire different world or perhaps he had somehow pulled inside the game. And his own absurd world was now real.
☯[WELCOME TO FANTASY SIMULATOR]☯
[Administrator "North" recognized. Because you enjoyed playing this game so much. You have been chosen as lucky world traveler. Thus, you are no longer a player. You are now a part of the system.]
[Processing...]
[Role Assigned: "Designated Scapegoat of Cosmic Balance."]
[Error: System Stability— 0%. Too much chaos detected. Attempting forced balance...]
[Status: Stripping of all privileges]
[New Role: Integration Required]
North’s lips twitched violently, he couldn't breathe.
[Plot Armor: 0.1% - Critical Low]
[Survival Tax: In Debt Already]
[Surreal Charm: CATASTROPHICALLY HIGH]
[Installing Base Template...]
[Template Installed: "Wherever I Stop, A Plot Begins"]
As voices rang out in his head one after another, North slowly turned his head, eyes narrowing as Old Man Wei sat nearby drinking and sighing, who had unofficially became designated quest givers to the young masters of the Five Immortal Continents.
A random visionary in the distance screamed, "YOU DARE EXIST IN MY PRESENCE?!" and instantly launched a world-shattering sword beam in his direction.
A Jade Beauty gasped from a pavilion, "How shameless! He has seen my face—he must dug out his eyes or die!"
North exhaled, fat tears brimming in his eyes.
"...Somebody Get Me Out of Here..."
This was the beginning of his Last Game.