Shaynen always burned bright. He was confidence, and it was that confidence that carried him through the years at the Temple of Dreams. Found as a child, hardly speaking of where he’d come from or what he went through, Shaynen worked hard. Working through exhaustion, happy to absorb everything the Temple had to teach…
Nine years altogether…
All of it led to the Ceremony of Dreams. Where he would finally meet his spirit…
Shaynen clenched and unclenched his fists. Unable to stop readjusting and moving to different seats in the common room. The only noise in the room was from the fire in the stone fireplace. Outside the windows the sun was falling from the sky towards nightfall. The door creaked and Shaynen shot to his feet. Holding his breath until he could see who was entering.
“Just me, don’t get excited.” Jay said as he slammed the door behind him. Shaynen let out his breath in a sigh and fell into his seat. “Well don’t get so depressed either.” Shaynen scoffed but smiled.
“Skipping study hall? Shame on you Jay.” Shaynen said sarcastically, playfully crossing his arms and staring with mock scrutiny.
“I got excused,” Jay said, holding up a paper note. “Finished my takeaway work early so I could come keep you company. I knew you’d be losing your mind.”
“You have no idea,” Shaynen flopped over the back of the bench and hung upside down.
“Did Master Ayre mention why your ceremony has to be isolated?” Jay asked as hiked his leg over the bench to sit on it sideways.
“No,” Shaynen sat up and readjusted again so he could sit crossed legged on the bench. “Do you think that’d quell the anxiety?”
“Nah,” Jay shook his head. “Betcha it’s to keep you from getting your ass kicked by all the other acolytes.”
“Human’s go through the ceremony at eighteen! Why can’t I?” Shaynen rolled to stand up again.
“Probably cause you aren’t a human,” Jay pointed out. “And human’s are a minority here, and also Elves go through the ceremony at adulthood and you’re…” Jay did some whispering math. “About 82 years too short.” Shaynen laughed and Jay chuckled along with him. Though the laughter died and they moved about in silence.
“Shame about that final exam,” Shaynen said quietly.
“I think I’d have gone through the Ceremony like everyone else.” Jay shrugged. “Then we’d be right here again.”
“Yeah, but we’d be on equal footing,” Shaynen said.
“Yeah,” Jay nodded. Shaynen walked around the bench and sat on the bench sideways to face Jay.
“I’ll be here for yours.” Shaynen said, reaching over and putting his hand on Jay’s.
“Even if you get assigned somewhere else?” Jay asked. Shaynen took the note from Jay’s hand.
“I’ll get excused,” Shaynen held up the note. Jay pushed up his glasses and smiled.
“You want to know a secret?” He said. Taking the note and revealing an empty paper. “I didn’t get excused.” The two started giggling like school children.
The sun dipped low and covered the room in a blanket of gold. Shaynen could feel the warmth of it on his back. Little curves of golden light dodged around Shaynen and caught the edges of Jay’s hair and face. Jay smiled with a soft and faraway look. The smile slowly faded as something tangible could almost be seen behind his eyes.
“Shaynen?” Jay started but before he could continue his thought there was a knock at the door. Master Ayre peeked in and Shaynen jumped to his feet.
“It’s time,” Master Ayre said, sparing a look at Jay.
“Put a pin in that for a minute?” Shaynen asked, though he didn’t wait for a reply. Running to make it through the door with Master Ayre behind him.
"Why can't I perform the ceremony like everyone else?" Shaynen asked as Master Ayre past him to lead him down the empty halls.
"Your case is unorthodox, I believe you might take a little more time than the others." The elder responded hesitantly. He opened his mouth but shut it again.
"What is it?" Shaynen asked.
"Nothing," Master Ayre said with a small shake of his head. "Or rather, it will depend on the outcome of your ceremony."
"Do you think I'm not ready?" Shaynen asked. Feeling the anxiety bubbling up in his empty stomach.
"I don't know what to think," Master Ayre said. "Your case is unique." The uncertainty did little for Shaynen's stomach. He fell to silence for the remainder of the walk through the halls, his anxieties mounting and trying to force him back to the comfort of uniformity.
He was led down the stairs to the ceremony chambers deep in the heart of the temple of dreams. Accompanying the fade of natural light in favor of single dim lanterns, there was an increase in the sounds of running water. Shaynen had questions, the amount growing the farther into the subterranean corridors he went. He couldn't quite force his voice to acknowledge them. The spiraling stairwell ended in a large dim corridor where only small candles lit the floor, floating in little currents of water along the edges of the corridor.
Walking down the arched Hall, shaynen felt even his heartbeat was too loud. Pounding rapidly in his chest, wondering if everyone who walked these halls felt the same.
At the end of the hall was a giant set of double doors. Where the rivers on either side of the hall flowed out from. Master Ayre stood to the side of it.
"All unnecessary items must be removed prior to entry of the pool." He said, his whispering voice echoed. Shaynen nodded, still speechless. He placed his hands on the doors to open them.
"Shaynen," Master Ayre said suddenly. His slightly louder outburst bounced violently off the walls. Shaynen turned to look at him. Aftera minute of silence, Master Ayre managed to speak; "have faith in yourself."
"Okay," shaynen barely breathed. He pushed open the stone doors. They were hinged to always fall shut and it took an amount of strength to open the doors enough to slip through.
Shaynen stood in the room and the doors thundered closed behind him. The room was pitch black, with a single dim light falling from an unseen ceiling. In the center of that light was a rhythmic drop of water that fell into the center of a pool. Shaynen waited for his eyes to adjust to the darkness, it didn't take long for the room to come into focus.
The pool in the center of the room wasn't very wide. The single drop of water would ripple the surface and once the water calmed again the drop would hit the surface and it would ripple again. Before the pool was a stone table that had a single wide lipped cup waiting. The floor was engraved with deep grooves that water traveled through.
Shaynen walked forward, untying the white cloth from around his chest. He wound it and placed it on the table, his dreamcatcher placed on top of the folds. He debated what could be considered unnecessary. Deciding that if clothes weren't unnecessary for the deafening then they weren't unnecessary here. He took up the cup and drained it. Stepping up onto the edge of the pool and shook out his hands, trying to stop his fear from telling him to run.
He stepped down into the water, the level only going half way up his shins. He placed around the single beam of light and water drop. Trying to decide which way to face. He settled, sitting cross legged in the water, facing the door. He leaned back to the drop fell between his legs. The nerves in his stomach squeezed tightly, he hoped he wouldn't throw up, he couldn't even fathom how he would clean the pool if he did.
His mind tried to tell him that it wasn't too late, that he could still back out. Though he knew that wasn't true. He took a last steadying breath before adjusting and sitting up straight. Tipping his head back so the drop could land on his forehead. He could feel his mind starting to spin and his face got warm, his mind couldn’t wander far, anchored by the single drop. It felt like he was melting into the pool. There was something moving around the room. He could almost hear it…
~...~
Shaynen gasped and sat up in alarm. The room was dark and Shaynen had no idea where he was at first, or why he was there. His clothes were wet from laying in the pool, the single drop of water falling from the ceiling slapped against the back of his neck.
The realization hit him so hard it was as if the entire building came down on top of him. He had no idea what to do, the water dropping onto him felt like a boulder of shame dropping heavier and heavier over him. Shaynen racked his brain trying to figure out what it was that he did wrong. Was he over dressed? Did he not center himself correctly? What was it?
This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.
“Shaynen?” Master Ayre called tentatively, creating one of the stone doors open but not entering. “Is everything all right? It’s nearly midnight.” Shaynen felt more panic settling in as new accusatory thoughts burst in. Of course he took the longest and still had nothing to show for it. His knees slid up and Shaynen wrapped his arms around them, curling up as tightly as he could. Resting his head on his knees.
“Shaynen?” Master Ayre peeked hesitantly into the doors. He ducked into the doors and ran to the edge of the pool. “Are you hurt?”
“No,” Shaynen said. His mind was on fire, bouncing back and forth between coming up with a lie or admitting the truth.
“Come out of the water,” Master Ayre held out a hand for Shaynen to take. “What did you see?”
“Nothing,” Shaynen whispered into his knees. Not moving.
“What?”
“I said, I saw nothing” Shaynen’s yell bounced off the walls like taunting phantoms. He covered his face to hide the tears. Master Ayre breathed a sigh, closing his eyes in relief.
“Perhaps, it could be a blessing,” He said. Shaynen’s head snapped up.
“How can this possibly be a blessing!” Shaynen snapped viciously. “How can I leave this room without a spirit? How do I face anyone here having failed?”
“You didn’t fail,” Master Ayre said sternly.
“Has anyone come out of these chambers without a spirit?” Shaynen asked. The elder couldn’t reply. Shaynen searched his face and felt the dread rising. “Has anyone ever had to try again?” Still there was no answer, he rested his head on his knees again in shock. Staring into nothing.
“I don’t have the answers you want.” Master Ayre said, “this might be something you have to find yourself.”
“How?” Shaynen sighed.
“For now, we’ll get some sleep. Tomorrow we’ll look at it with fresh eyes.”
Shaynen took Master Ayre’s offered hand and stood up. He couldn’t meet his eyes, staring directly down at his feet. Gathering his things from the table and holding them to his chest. He was exhausted in every way. Remembering Jay shared a dorm with him made him stand up straight in fresh panic. What was he going to say? How was he going to explain it? He begged whatever force was listening for Jay to already be asleep. It was nearly midnight, lights out was at ten. Not that lights out ever really stopped Jay.
Shaynen was almost shaking when he reached the commons. The sheer terror of opening the door to see Jay waiting made him stop before the door. Unable to reach for the handle.
“Get some sleep,” Master Ayre pat him on the shoulder, “We’ll think of something in the morning.” Shaynen nodded shakily, he felt like he would throw up when he grabbed the handle and opened the door. The commons were dark, despite the gloom, Shaynen didn’t see Jay in the commons. He let out a deep breath and slipped into the room. Sneaking through the commons and into the dorms where the acolytes slept.
Shaynen snuck to his cot and placed his things neatly with his few other possessions underneath it. He crawled into the bed and pulled the thin blanket overtop of him. All the emotion settled down atop him, pulling the blanket over his head and curling into a ball. Quietly crying until he fell asleep…
Shaynen slept fitfully, tossing and turning until his pillow hung half-way off his cot and his blanket was thrown to the ground. He curled up again, resting his head onto his arm with most of the pillow out of reach. He could hear the sound of water dripping from somewhere and every drop would roll him tighter into a ball. Somewhere in the overpowering sound there was a tiny unintelligible whisper.
A drop of water and Shaynen cracked an eye open. Looking through the dark at the window. Through the frosted windows he could see the muddled starlight. No rain, no water to fall through some unseen crack. Shaynen rolled over more asleep than awake and drifted back to sleep.
The single drop of water fell again and this time the whisper behind it clearly speaking his name. Shaynen’s eyes shot open. He sat up and looked around the room. All the cots were filled with their owners. But there was still the sound of water falling from somewhere, with the whispering trailing right behind it. Echoing like Shaynen was at the tail end of the reverberating echo.
Shaynen ducked to look under his bed. Expecting to see Jay playing some kind of stupid prank on him, but there was nothing under the bed. Shaynen sat back up and stared at the end of his bed. The sound of water echoed around the ceiling and the whispers bounced with it. Shaynen tried to follow the sound but when he looked to where he thought the sound was coming from it would move to another hard to see corner.
He sighed in annoyance and swung his legs over the edge of the cot. Staring at the floor. Shaynen shook his head trying to rid himself of the sound but it just would shake loose. He stood up, rushing for the door. Not sure where he was going to go but all he knew was that he couldn’t sit still and listen to the sound.
Shaynen looked at every one of the cots to make sure none were awake. SLowly shutting the door to the dormitories. He sighed in a second of silence. Surprised when the echoes came from behind him, just as loud. He jumped around and found only the empty commons. The whispers were flowing around in the commons and flowing out toward the window. He could feel the pull of a current trying to pull him along with it. He subconsciously slid half an inch toward the window before his better judgment kicked in and he turned that momentum toward the door of the commons. The whispers followed, trying to beckon him back. His mind was bouncing between two extremes, making him dizzy as he walked down the halls. (*) He considered following the noise while also convincing himself that whatever it is can come into the temple to reveal itself if that's what it wanted. For every reason to go he had an excuse to stay.
He covered his ears to see if that could help block the sound out but it kept on clear as a bell. With covering his ears not working he ran his hands through his hair and stared up at the ceiling in frustration. The dripping water followed him, riding on his heels. Shaynen turned abruptly and faced the water still hoping that it was caused by a dumb joke that went too far. The hall seemed to open up in a river that was all too ready to sweep him away. Shaynen turned and walked the hall faster.
"I must be still dreaming," shaynen said aloud. "That's why there's noise and everything seems askew. It's all a dream." Even spoken aloud the words weren't convincing.
"What would I even do? Just vanish into the night following a phantom sound?" Shaynen scoffed nearly hysterical. "To where? With what supplies? Would I just assume everyone will be cool with this? Who's going to teach the new students what's edible and what's not? Who's going to teach the kids how to make textiles out of trees?" Shaynen held his arms around his chest as he paced back and forth in a sitting area made from the corner of two adjoining halls. He stared accusingly at the benches. Ducking to look underneath the closest one.
"I can't abandon my friends here," he murmured. The current pulling him to the balcony window. "I'm not going out there, not again." Quick memories danced across his vision. His stomach lurched hard as his muscle memory remembered the struggle better than his mind ever could.
"I can't do it again," he stood up, trying to back away from the balcony windows. "I can't afford to lose it all again." He swallowed hard. The single drop of water sped up, the whispers sounding like they were just outside the door. Coming closer. His breath hitched,
"I avoided disaster once, what could happen this time… if I go…"
If I go. Those words opened the doors of possibility with a thundering roar that made shaynen gasp sharply. He ran to the doors and threw them open. Hoping to see what was making the noise. Instead there was nothing but an empty balcony, an endless sea of stars and the surrounding forest canopy. He sighed with a hint of disappointment. Moving to the edge of the enclosed balcony and looking over the wall.
Through the walls, shaynen spotted movement. He leapt up onto the wall and strained his eyes. There was something. It moved the trees and left a black mist in its wake. Shaynen felt like he'd been punched in the stomach. The mist vanished and shaynen was able to breathe again. The sound of rain coming from the trees. He sighed, clenching and unclenching his fists before turning, separating his hair and pulling it up into its bun.
Shaynen snuck into the dorms and grabbed his cloth and sandals. Giving himself adequate time to think better, but instead all he did was contemplate why he was doing it at all, somehow without stopping for a second. The entire temple was silent. Without a single soul anywhere, even the courtyard was dark and quiet. Shaynen moved out of the temple and past it's front gates.
"Okay, what?" He said to the quiet forest. Not even the crickets answered him. Shaynen swallowed hard. "You woke me up, and for what?" He started into the trees,
"Just so you know I'm not leaving," shaynen said "I can't be distracted by whatever this is. I've got important things to do." The forest was silent as Shaynen past through it. A rock dropped into Shaynen's stomach, the conflicting feeling returning.
"I don't need you to know I'm good enough!" He yelled. "I don't know where you're trying to lead me and I don't need to." Shaynen sighed and stopped walking.
"Okay, maybe I do." He said quietly. "Maybe I really want you to take me someplace that I know doesn't exist but. I swear I…" shaynen sighed. Feeling stupid. "I'm talking to trees."
Shaynen swallowed and rubbed at his face. He heard a drop of water hit the grass and he uncovered his face. He was hit on the arm by another drop that glowed. All around him more of the water began to fall, drenching him and the surrounding area. He watched the water wondering if he dared look up.
He chanced a glance up and saw a flood of illuminated water like a tap falling right overtop him. Shaynen booked it, jumping onto a half fallen tree and scaling it to the highest point. The rush of water crashing and splashing up over the sides. The spray only barely able to reach him. Shaynen's heart tried to break his ribs as he watched the ethereal glow of the falling water. He realized there were things moving inside it. Shaynen slid down the fallen trunk. His mouth was dry from it hanging open.
Slowly, he touched the water and recoiled. Nothing happened. Shaynen swallowed and slid fully into the water, the level only reaching mid-shin. The whispers from inside the column of water were nearly understandable as Shaynen walked around it. He reached forward.
No sooner had his fingers touched the water did the falls explode into a bright sky of light. Shaynen jumped back but a giant smile broke out as he saw that along the edges of the rays of light were animal spirits. Birds flew in flocks, deer pranced in herds. Shaynen's face froze to panic and a herd of elephants stampeded towards him. He fell flat to the ground with an unflattering noise. The ground shook from the force the elephants' stomping made. Shaynen felt the wind of The elephant's feet passing just above him. He uncovered his head and peeked up as they past over him.
Shaynen could hardly breathe, every animal he could ever imagine was here, moving and passing around him. He let out a waterlogged laugh as he watched the spirits draw near. Staring up he was surprised by the weight of a school of fish as they swam in an invisible stream around him. Shaynen ran to follow but slid to a stop as a pack of wolves jumped up from a new ray of light. Barking and running about playfully. Shaynen crotched and held out his hands for one of them to come. He clicked his tongue and beckoned.
The herd cocked their heads in wonder but ultimately ran in the opposite direction. Shaynen stood and stared, noticing the spirits were all flicking away from him. Shaynen slowly turned and saw a tide that was rising up over him. It cracked and a massive pair of wings unfolded before the tide crested and fell. Washing past shaynen and through the trees.
"Wait!" Shaynen yelled. He ran to follow the wave as it was washing further and further away. He pushed himself as hard as he could but couldn't gain. Shaynen flashed, jumping forward enough to barely touch the wave with the tips of his fingers before it vanished with the first light of morning.
Shaynen felt the glow of the spirits coating him, he was hyperventilating. Every nerve was on fire in a way it had never been before. It was a pressure building in his chest. It made him giddy without a single thought running through his head.
Shaynen ran.
And he didn't look back.