...What the hell is this...!?

W...why do I have claws!?

I jolt up in my panic, only to fall back downwards, wincing in pain. It hurts... everything hurts so much...! It's like my body was just torn apart and reassembled! Or maybe just... torn apart...? It still hurts after all... haha...

N-no! That's... not important. I have to figure out what happened to me. I push myself up, squeezing my eyes shut due to the pain, when I notice something else.

Squeezing my eyes shut...? No. My left eye... it's gone. Gouged out, seemingly in some type of intense struggle.

Oh god... what the hell happened...? Why did this happen to me?

I just... ate that meat, and the next thing I knew...

I look around in a panic for the rabbit, but all I see are piles of skeletons, torn to shreds. Sitting right next to it are a dozen of bug corpses split in two, their insides completely drained. Even the organs I removed from the rabbit are nowhere to be seen. Except for the berries, which are practically untouched, everything is gone.

...Where did... all of these skeletons come from...?

My eye drops down to my hands. They're drenched in red all the way up to my upper arms. I bet if I could see my face, it would be covered in dried blood as well.

I crawl to the corner and throw up. I won't even try to hold back or stop myself, what I just saw and did was so disgusting, the smell of vomit won't make a big difference anyway, so it doesn't really matter.

I wipe my mouth with my sleeve.

...I knew it. I shouldn't have eaten that meat, it was giving me such a bad vibe that entire time...! I'm an idiot! Idiot, idiot, idiot! I would say I want to cry, but I'm already crying pretty hard now!

My hands reflexively squeeze tight, pushing my new claws into my skin. I quickly relax them as soon as I sense the pain, but I've already reopened the earlier wounds made from the same action. My teeth clench shut, and I hiss from the pain.

...Ah... my teeth feel weird. What, do I have fangs now as well...?

...No. It's... different. It's not just fangs, all of my teeth are different. It's like they're... optimized for eating meat. I have fang-like, long, pointed teeth for gripping prey, and sharp, blade-like teeth for cutting meat. The main similarity between them is they're all razor sharp.

I...I wasn't even serious when I was talking about the fangs, you know? It was just a little playful remark, but for the reality to actually be worse...

I know you've been throwing jokes at me, life, but something as cruel as this... I haven't even been here for two whole days, and I'm already losing part of my humanity...! Even if I find civilization, I'm never even going to be able to fit in! Chances are, I'll just be enslaved and sold off as some exotic good...

...What did I do to deserve this...?

...Please.

I don't want to be alone anymore.

I don't want to be hungry.

I don't want to be afraid.

I don't want to feel this pain anymore.

...I don't... want to die again...!

Is that too much to ask!?

...

For a moment, I calm down a bit and listen to the wind blow. Of course, it's not really the wind. It's night outside, meaning that those strange creatures are lurking about, making those sounds. Either way, it's nice to just listen to. It's almost... relieving, even, but only for a bit.

This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it

I raise my hand to hit the floor--a simple show of frustration--but instead of beating down with my fist, I instinctually slash with my claws. A tiny, practically miniscule scratch mark appears. Of course, with my strength, I wasn't expecting anything more. If your body is weak, even the sharpest blade won't cut through stone.

I take off the scarf around my feet that I never returned to my neck. With its current condition, it would be fair to call it a red scarf, rather than white like it used to be. I wrap it around my neck with care, before slumping down on the floor, resting my head on the extra cloth.

It hurts. This feeling of emptiness is just tearing away at my soul. This cold feeling, as though my heart is turning to ice... I can't take it. I curl up into a ball, hugging my knees to my chest. My body trembles incessantly, despite my mind's futile attempts to calm down. Deep breaths change to hyperventilation. Daydreaming turns to a mental nightmare.

I...it's okay. I'm going to be fine. I'll just fall asleep here for the night, and when I wake up, it'll all be a dream. Just like nothing happened at all.

It'll be... just like a dream.

"...A...ha...aha..."

A dry, broken laugh resounds throughout the cave. I jump a bit, before realizing it's my own ruined voice, forcing itself through my useless vocal cords.

...Yeah... of course it's me. Nobody else is even here. Of course, I might be going insane. I won't be ruling that possibility out, no matter how much I want to.

...Even if I wake up, and it turns out that nothing even happened, what will I even do about it? I'll still be stuck with a life in this damn forest.

Yeah, no way.

A life in this hell where everything is trying to drive me insane, trying to end my life...

I can hardly even call that a life.

I wipe off the tears dripping down my face. I can't live here anymore. I don't care if I can't find my own place in society, but as long as I'm in this hellhole, I might as well kill myself.

Because in my eyes, it's actually starting to become worse than death itself.

If I stay here, what will my life be? Eating mystery meat that slowly robs me of my humanity? Going out over and over again, just to collect the bare necessities? Like a machine, doing the same thing, not remembering anything but what I already know?

Yeah, right.

If that's what it is, it would indeed be best to just fall asleep and never wake up.

...

...Hah...

All of that venting was kinda... relieving. What's the term for that called again? Catharsis? Yeah...

How cathartic.

I roll around on the ground, only to bump into a small, furry object. Is it the rabbit? No, it's...

"meow"

A...kitten...?

I see a ball of fur jump away seemingly startled. It's a mix of black and white, kind of like a fancy suit, and only reaches up to my knees in terms of height. It's big eyes hold a mixture of surprise and fear, but also seem rather curious of me.

...Why are you here? Or rather, how are you here? I didn't even notice you at all...

It walks around clumsily, before stopping for a moment to stare at my eye. With almost human-like expressiveness, it totters over and plops down in front of my chest.

Ah... it just... even though it's me...

As I slowly grasp on to the kitten and hug it closer, the tears gradually start to run again. The kitten doesn't respond to the sudden grab, and almost seems to nuzzle deeper into my body.

It's just... so nice to finally just see one thing that's not trying to kill me, you know? It feels so warm, so soft, that I'm just crying from relief.

I run my hand down the kitten's fur, taking in the softness into my palm, and repeat the action over and over. Eventually, a soft growl-like sound enters my sensitive ears... it's purring.

A creature like this, I can't even bring myself to kill for food.

...Have my thoughts become so twisted that I would even contemplate such a thing? I really am going crazy...

The kitten looks up and starts licking my face. Little flakes of red fall to the ground... dried blood, most likely. It wouldn't happen to be cleaning me, would it? Or is it just hungry?

If you're hungry, then sorry, but I can't really feed you. I'm all out of food, you see. Although, I guess you don't even care, do you?

It must be nice to be a cat.

You don't need to worry about learning to hunt... it probably comes naturally as they grow up. And even if you do struggle with it, you don't have the necessary intelligence to suffer so much about it, do you?

...Sorry. That was rude of me.

The kitten scratches at my cloak with its tiny claws. Just like mine, but smaller, huh.

I can't help but want to protect such a thing, but what can I even do for it? I don't have the strength, will, or resources to do such a thing, do I? I can't save you from harm. I'm sorry, but there's nothing I can do... you should just head back to your mama or papa, where it'll be safer...

...Yeah, safer... cause seeing how I'm living life, the least safe place is probably right at my side.

I push it away, sending it stumbling down, but it immediately gets back up and crawls back towards me. It jumps around, clawing at the cloth of the scarf resting under my head in a playful manner. I sit up in resignation and take off my scarf, letting the kitten do what it wants with it.

...I guess it really does intend on staying with me.

A smile creeps on my pitiful face as I watch the kitten play around with my scarf.

I think I've finally decided where to go from here.

Previously, I might have endured staying here and living such a painful life, or even killing myself so I wouldn't even need to experience it, but no matter what, I just can't let that happen, you know? It doesn't feel right to just give up like that.

...Thanks for the emotional support. You're really helping me a lot at the moment, little guy.

I hug the kitten closer to my body, and it lets out a tiny meow in response.

This damned forest...

I'm finally gonna leave it behind.