I had an epiphany.

With vomit pouring out of my mouth and into my lap, I found the sides of my lips raising into a mad smile.

Life could not get any weirder than it already was. This was it. Nothing more could surprise me. Not even if the Almighty revealed himself to me at that very moment.

Well, maybe that would surprise me but nothing else!

Gauss was standing up, his arms crossed over his chest. He was completely naked which made me realize that I was too. My eyes drifted to Deborah who, lucky for me, was also naked. However, it was hard to marvel at her stunning body when it was covered in puke.

I caught Gauss’ eyes which told me to avert mine away from the woman and I did so feeling like a dirty pervert.

The land, the world, the… where were we? Wherever we were, it was plain. In the spiritual readings that had once been my life’s goal to preach had defined a place called purgatory which, described this setting perfectly. Is that where I was? Purgatory? Where those poor souls waited to be relieved of their sins to be allowed into the heavenly kingdom? If so, where were the souls?

The ground was a mirror, reflecting everything above it. If I stared down at it long enough it ended up giving me a headache. There were also no walls and everything was white and without ornament. This world seemed to go on for as far as the eye could see. Being that everything was white, however, who knew if I was just staring at a distant wall.

I turned my head and noticed a large window behind me, which looked out into the real world revealing the other half of the church including the two dead homeless people and the church’s exit. If I squinted my eyes hard enough, I could see the grass just outside the church steps which was frozen in a sideways stance from the wind blowing through it. Time looked to have stopped completely.

“Where exactly are we?” I asked Gauss, wiping stomach acid from my lips.

“The Chamber of Stillness, I suppose.”

“And we’re here to train, right?” asked Deborah, turning away from us and using her forearm to hide most of her butt. This brought my attention to my own nudeness and I quickly covered my groin.

“That is correct.”

“And how are we supposed to do that butt naked and without weapons?” Deborah asked, pointing through the window at the armor and weapons that had been left behind on the ground.

Gauss rubbed his chin as he thought a moment. He walked to the window and put his hand to it. Then, he slammed his fist into it. There was a loud thud and I could feel the vibrations come through the ground to where I was sitting.

Then, he did something I hadn’t thought of. He simply walked around the window, disappearing. A few seconds later, he whistled for us to join him and we did so. As we were walking, Deborah looked down at where I was covering myself, and then she looked me in the eyes and winked. I could feel my cheeks go red instantly. I wanted to think of something witty to say or maybe even wink back at her but my nerves kept me from doing so.

Behind the window was no window at all but another altar that looked surprisingly similar to the one Gauss had shattered what seemed only minutes before. It was even covered in the same dust and two half-melted red candles. The wooden face of the altar, which I had come to take for granted, had three hourglasses carved into it. The main one in the middle was standing upright while the hourglass on each side of it was tilted away. How had I not noticed this before?

Gauss hovered his hand over the altar. He kept it there a moment before letting it rest on top of it. A sword appeared instantly a few inches away from his fingers.

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“Just as I thought,” he said, grabbing the sword and giving it a few spins to his side.

The blackness of Gauss’s skin was evident in the all-white world we were in. He also had a much more mature body and, dare I say, a more manly and hardened body than my own. I really wanted to be clothed now and so I too put my hand on the altar.

A long grey robe appeared and I quickly took it and threw it over my shoulders. It was neither warm nor cold. The temperature of this place didn’t seem to change at all no matter what. I felt comfortable, plain and simple. It was a feeling of neutrality.

Deborah followed my example. She placed her hand on the altar and instead of a robe she was given a nightgown. She raised a questioning eyebrow as she too placed it over her shoulders giving me a quick glance at her exposed breasts.

Dear Almighty, cleanse me of these impure thoughts.

“The altar gives you what is needed and bases its manifestation slightly on what you desire.”

“Makes sense for me,” I said. “Seeing my old church had me wishing I was preaching again. Guess that’s why it gave me a robe.”

“And I’m really tired,” said Deborah, rubbing the soft material on her skin and yawning.

Gauss placed the sword back on the table and it disappeared. It was then replaced by a set of black armor, the same ones he’d left in the real world. As he started to dawn the plate, Deborah and I walked back around the window to explore a little.

We walked forward a ways, both of our heads turning as if expecting to see something different besides whiteness.

“How do you think something like this has come to exist?” she asked me.

“I don’t know,” I answered. “Out of all my years of preaching, I’ve never heard of this place. It makes me wonder why places like the Refuge have kept these sorts of things out of the heads of the public.”

“Maybe because the public can’t be trusted with these sorts of things. Maybe it’s too much for them.”

“Maybe,” I said. “But you would never know unless you tried.”

“I think anyone who told the truth and explained to the masses of Auracle that there were hidden lands like this that that confessor would probably get his ass hung in the gallows for blasphemy.”

“You’re probably right,” I said, nodding my head. “If you would have told me something like this existed a year ago, I would have laughed at you and told you to come to church with me where I would then instruct you on reality. Turns out, I had no clue what reality was.”

“I was born in the Refuge so this stuff as always been my normal,” Deborah said, keeping her face forward as we walked.

I felt a warmness in my chest and started taking a few steps closer to her without even knowing it. Never before had I felt this way and I wondered now if I would change the past to get rid of all of this if I could. And, I was no longer sure if I would. I was really starting to like Deborah and not just for her physicality. Well, I’d never really liked a woman before, never had had the chance to.

I was just about to respond to her when my foot stepped into something wet. I looked down to see a midsized pool of light green water that had a thin layer of steam coming off the top of it. It was warm on my toes and I had an urge to dip myself entirely into it.

“Turn around,” came Gauss’ voice, more stern than it had been since the outbreak of demons in the Refuge.

Both Deborah and I did turn around. The man was breathing heavier than normal and he looked downright scary in his black armor.

“What are you doing?” I asked him, taking a step back.

“Prepare yourselves. Both of you. Training starts now.”

I put my hands up as I looked at Deborah. She had a nasty scowl on her face.

“Now, hold on a minute. Can’t we just rest a few minu-“

Gauss was on me like an animal. He slammed my demonic hand out of the way with his left while using his right to punch me straight in the jaw. I spun with the momentum of the hit and found myself laying on my side a few seconds later, my head ringing from the impact.

I could hear Deborah screaming in the background as Gauss continued his attack. He mounted me and was hammer fisting me in the shoulder and in my ribs. The pain lasted for only moments before I couldn’t feel anything anymore.

I was in a dreamlike state when Gauss stepped off of me and attacked Deborah. She put up a better fight than I did but only for five more seconds. She too fell to her side and Gauss fell atop of her as well. He picked her up by her hair and smashed her face into the ground repeatedly.

I wanted to scream but just could not. I was having a hard enough time breathing as is and so I just laid there watching Deborah lose a few teeth before Gauss stood up rubbing his hands together as if saying job well done to himself.

He walked over to me, his chest rising and lowering rapidly, both of his nostrils flared. I closed my eyes, waiting for him to restart his beating of me. But that’s not what happened. Instead, he bent over and started to roll me over gently.

With one final push, I felt the warmness of the pool drench my robes as I sunk to the bottom.