Chapter 13
Ignis, with a swift, decisive motion, unleashed the power of Timestop, freezing the chaotic scene before them. Three icy blasts erupted from his fingertips, each seeking a critical point: the entrance they had used, the opposite doorway, and the stone stairway leading to the portal. The world was held frozen like a renaissance painting, the orcs mid-stride, their roars stifled.
The Dogs and Tigers, with a thunderous chorus of roars, sent shockwaves rippling through the cavern, disorienting the remaining orcs. Rob, the stalwart fighter, pounded his hammer against his shield, issuing a defiant challenge also echoing through the frozen chamber further debuffing the frozen orcs.
Elly, ever vigilant, reapplied the potent Pierce enchantment to every weapon in their arsenal, including the fearsome claws and teeth of the beasts. Pierce , invoked his newfound Boon, a surge of life energy that fortified the party and their companions, to his surprise even the beasts received the buff.
As the world remained frozen, a symphony of destruction unfolded. Elly and Ignis unleashed a barrage of arrows, fireblasts, and ice shards, their attacks finding purchase in the frozen orcs. The beasts, agile and ferocious, descended the icy stairs, their claws and teeth tearing through the frozen horde with brutal efficiency. The once-threatening orcs were now mere playthings, their frozen bodies shattered by the combined might of the party and their loyal companions.
"Out of mana, boss," Ignis's voice signaled over the group chat, a note of desperation in his tone.
"That's alright," Pierce replied, a grin spreading across his face. "Just hide behind the portal and rest for a moment. This crazy plan might actually work."
"Dude, you just jinxed it!" Flint exclaimed, taking his position in front of the portal as a horde of orcs attempted to climb up the icy stairs.
“Some idiots always gotta ice skate uphill!” Ignis says marveling at the thick layer of ice between the hoard and his party.
"What is this 'jinx' you speak of, and how might I acquire it?" Grok inquired, her voice echoing through the cavern. She and Bromli had soared to the top of the cavern, their first dive-bomb run already underway. They rained down a hail of orc corpses, dropped from their inventory using the fallen orcs as ammunition against their own army.
"Keep track of your kills, the highest score after this battle earns the coveted title of 'Jinx' within our party," Evolon announced to the group, a mischievous glint in her eye.
"You and your counting kills crap, what am I going to do, heal them to death?" Pierce grumbled, his hands a blur as he topped off the party's health and tended to the wounded beasts.
Suddenly, a colossal orc, clad in intimidating blue metallic armor, leaped onto the portal stage, its roar echoing through the cavern. The creature, towering over Flint, drew two menacing swords and prepared to strike. Arrows, fireballs, and ice bolts bounced harmlessly off its impervious armor.
Flint, undeterred, blocked the first blow with his shield and deflected the second with his hammer. However, the orc's relentless assault proved too much. A vicious slash tore through Flitns leg armor, followed by another into his collar bone. Just as the mortal wound threatened to claim him, the wounds began to seal, and the orc froze in place, its menacing pose frozen in time as Ignis cast Time Freeze again.
"Is that all you got?" Flint scoffed, cracking his neck. He retrieved his fallen hammer and swung it upward, striking the orc's vulnerable point in between his legs. A deafening clang echoed through the cavern, but the metallic armor remained unscathed.
"Oh hell no, we're not going to invade the cavern, face insurmountable odds, run out of mana as they climb the stairs to kill us, and then confront an unkillable boss. That's not how this story ends!" Evolon declared, firing two arrows directly into the frozen orc boss's eyes. With a resounding DING, the boss was vanquished.
"That armor just tanked a shot to the balls, come to poppa!" Flint exclaimed, absorbing the boss's body, claiming its armor and weapons, and adding the corpse to the growing pile of ammunition for Grok's aerial assaults.
"When the portal dissipates, we'll make a hasty retreat back the way we came, slowing their pursuit with Ignis's ice magic," Pierce strategized over the mental link.
"What about the captured humans?" Evolon asked, a note of concern in his voice.
"It's standard procedure for them to be shipped off through portals to other worlds for interrogation, sorting, and selling," Grok explained, dropping the boss's corpse onto a horde of orcs below.
"So, an intergalactic magical stockyard for sentient beings?" Ignis asked, incredulous.
"A very eloquent way of putting it," Grok replied. "They also sell exotic animals for zoos, private collections, and, for the more discerning palate, to private chefs of the wealthy."
"Like the Collector from Marvel? That guy was the worst!" Pierce exclaimed, healing the Dogs and Tigers.
"Or like the worst Star Trek episodes, where plot armor protects the museums until it doesn't. Poor Moopsy!" Evolon lamented.
"You are not to hug the cute space monsters! Once again, I cannot revive your corpse!" Pierce shouted, his voice filled with exasperation.
"But what if they're cute and cuddly?" Evolon protested.
"Have you ever seen a shaved panda bear?" Flint asked, a wry smile on his face.
"I'm sure they're cute and cuddly too!" Evolon insisted, huffing in frustration.
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"There's stuff out there that could rip your arms off," Flint countered, a serious tone in his voice.
"Grok, what is this armor made of? I can't even scratch it with my hammer," Flint asked, examining the mysterious metal.
"Grok is no metal expert, but I believe it's Chronite. A very rare magical metal, immune to kinetic force unless superheated to glowing. It's highly sought after by heavy guards, or 'tanks' as you call them," Grok explained.
"Very nice!" Flint exclaimed, equipping the armor directly from his inventory.
"That orc was over a foot taller than you. How does that armor fit?" Ignis asked, astonished.
"Size enchantment," Flint replied, his voice filled with wonder. "I can read its properties now that it's equipped. That guy would have wiped the floor with us without the Timestop and the shot to the eyes. Holy crap, it gives a whopping 25 armor, doubling my Defense to 44!" Flint marveled at his newfound power. “I could tank shots from a sniper with this on!”
"Everyone, time to test the armor with kicks to the sack, line starts behind me!" Ignis declared, his attention briefly diverted from the fiery chaos he had unleashed upon the orcs. A tiger, unfazed by the flames, pounced on a hapless orc, tearing it limb from limb.
"Now that I think about it, has anyone checked the properties of their robe? My Azure Arcanum increases spell effect duration by 20%. That's why my Timestop is lasting longer than expected," Ignis mused, examining the fabric of his new robe.
"Yes, yes, the wizard has a new magic robe. What really impresses me is that Grok's robe is making her beasts' roars last 20% longer," Evolon observed.
"Magic mechanics are weird," Pierce commented. "Can you imagine having to put a robe on each of the Dogs? Fluffy, there, biting off an orc's arm while dressed as a Christmas schnauzer."
"Wait, let me try something," Ignis said, pulling a bloody robe from his inventory and layering it over his existing robe. "So, the robe takes up both the chest and cloak slots. Now I have a 40% longer duration on my Timestop, Ice, and Fire spells."
"How about the hood as a hat? I'm not surprised the wizard is breaking the game by exploiting mechanics," Pierce quipped.
"Nope, I tried that. It seems the robes occupy both the chest and shoulder slots, but they probably weren't meant to be worn together like this. It's a bit warm, but I can just Ice Blast myself to cool off," Ignis explained.
Just as the wizard was about to unleash a blast of freezing air upon himself, the portal began to flicker and disappear.
"That's our cue, ladies and gentlemen," Pierce announced over the mental link.
Ignis allowed the ice on the stairs to melt as the controlled beasts sprinted towards the party. The group quickly exited through the original entrance, following Grok through the winding corridors. Ignis brought up the rear, casting ice spells at each intersection to slow any pursuing orcs.
Emerging from the cave, they found themselves in an open field bathed in an eerie purple moonlight. Strange stars twinkled overhead, casting an otherworldly glow on the landscape.
"We really are on a different planet," Pierce remarked, pausing to marvel at the celestial spectacle.
"Stupid human, run first, look at ancestors later!" Grok scolded, soaring ahead to scout for a suitable hiding place.
Snapping out of his reverie, Pierce sprinted after his companions, disappearing into the vast expanse of the alien countryside. After several kilometers of frantic running, the group regrouped, panting and exhausted, but safe.
"Do you know where we are?" Pierce asked Grok.
"Not every orc knows every part of Jusburnaxium after flying a few minutes in the sky," Grok replied.
"You didn't answer the question," Pierce persisted, tossing her a bag of beef jerky and a Mountain Dew.
"Yes, Grok knows where we are. Large Adventurer City Dunblag is a half-day march this way. Quicker if tiny humans move faster," Grok informed them, tapping on Flint's new helmet from her perch atop her Drake.
"Great! Everyone take off the robes and put them in their inventory. Ignis, turn yours inside out because I realize you'll never take it off, even to bathe," Pierce instructed the group. "From now on, we're an adventuring team, and Grok will be our spokesperson. Our priority is stealth. Our goals are to acquire items that allow us to communicate, disguise ourselves, gather information on the captive humans, and find portals both on and off this planet."
"Don't forget finding and killing the asshole that invaded our planet!" Evolon growled, her voice filled with righteous anger.
"Also, we need new gear. What we have is fine for plowing through level one orcs, but that big bastard would have been a problem," Flint said, taking a swig of his Peach Monster Energy drink.
"That reminds me, how many levels did you guys get for that big boy?" Pierce asked.
"Just one, why?" Ignis replied.
"Oh, I got two," Pierce said with a grin.
"Your 513 Cadium increase incoming experience, is usually doubled with one Cadium, but each beyond one does not seem to double it again. The math is beyond me," Grok explained.
"Oh, that reminds me, I had this pop-up that I ignored for a bit..." Pierce said, reading the prompt aloud. "Your group has slain a carrier of Cadium. How would you like to distribute the 1 Cadium acquired?"
"I say Grok here deserves it. One more won't help any of us anymore than ten, but one will double her amount," Flint suggested to the group, receiving affirmative nods.
"Grok cannot accept this gift. Entire clans would murder Grok for the one I have. Holding two Cadium would put a target on me I can never escape," Grok protested, her voice filled with reverence.
"It's not a gift. You earned it. You're a valued member of The Donner Party now, and it's about time you start catching up to us!" Evolon insisted, locking eyes with the large orc.
"I dub thee Grok the Pelvis Crusher, Member of The Donner Party!" Pierce declared, confirming the prompt and awarding the Cadium to Grok.
"Grok, did you add points to Intelligence? You seem to be forming full sentences more often now," Pierce observed.
"Grok is increasing mental and physical stats, as my beasts use my stat sheet as a base for their own power. More Wisdom means more roars, more Strength means more beast damage. I am also adjusting to your language as I am exposed to it," Grok explained, a toothy grin spreading across her face.
"Okay, break's over. Let's make like the Fellowship and run away from some orcs!" Flint declared, crushing an empty can against his helmet and tossing it into his inventory.
Over the next few hours, the group encountered a series of bizarre sights. Bottomless lakes, home to colossal krakens that lurked beneath the surface, ready to drag unsuspecting creatures to a watery grave. Copper-colored trees, as strong as bronze, yet as ordinary as any other. Large, winged serpents that molt like butterflies, transforming into flightless, reptilian chickens with paralyzing beaks. These beaks, it turned out, were highly prized by adventurers, as their dust could be applied to weapons to inflict a paralyzing effect for one day.
As the sun began to rise, casting a warm, red-orange glow over the landscape, the Donner Party crested a large hill, revealing the sprawling city below.
"Welcome to Dunblag on the planet of Jusburnaxium, my human friends," Grok announced, landing beside her companions and gesturing towards the city.
"Looks like a nice hive of scum and villainy," Flint muttered, hefting his hammer and descending the hill towards the city.