The first thing Robin noticed was the broom. It wasn’t the cheap plastic broom he had used before, it looked … expensive. It was made of wood, and had a small set of runes going around the top of the stick. The runes looked similar to the ones on the toilet seat and wall, but these ones were made with some kind of inlaid metal. The plastic bristles had been replaced by a band of grey straw, bound together by a brass ring with more of the small metal-inlaid runes.

  Robin had read Harry Potter. He reached out towards it, visions of swooping over the trees already filling his head. Robin stared in dismay at the box that appeared when he touched the broom.

Deverran Broom Typically wielded by priestesses of Deverra, the Deverran Broom is a powerful magical tool in the arsenal of a midwife. Any area cleaned by the Deverran Broom reduces the chance of miscarriage, stillbirth, infection, or other maladies directly associated with the process of birth. This effect will last 4 minutes per level of the Cleaning skill of the user. The Broom may be used as a divine focus for worshippers of Deverra.

  Robin felt his jaw dropping as he finished reading the text of the box. Why is there a tool for a midwife in a dungeon? He dismissed the text in a huff and snatched the broom out of the cabinet. It was heavier than it looked. Robin hefted it and swung it a few times, gripping it like a baseball bat right above the bristles. How tough was it, though? Robin looked at the mantis, his head pivoting perfectly in place. It wasn’t moving, and was still staring at him. Okay then…

  Robin swung the broom at the door of the cabinet. It connected with a loud “thunk” , but the door didn’t move much. Worse, the broom vibrated painfully in Robin’s hands and he accidentally dropped it. Robin stared at his hands, feeling stupid. He should have known better than that. He remembered when he had tried playing t-ball with an old bollard and missed the ball. The reverberations always hurt like heck. Why had they kept playing on the bollard? Who had he been with? He didn’t remember, and he was likely just trying to distract himself. Gritting his teeth, he picked the broom up and gave it a few more practice swings.

  The mantis stared down at him.

  Robin leaned the broom against the cabinet and reached back inside to pull out the other contents of the cabinet. They were in an open-topped wooden box that Robin suspected may once have been a milk crate. He pulled the entire box out and set it on the ground in front of him.

  There were two bottles, each made of glass. One had a green liquid inside and the other had a red powder. The green bottle had a “heart” symbol on the cork, but the red one was unlabeled. There were two rolls of white gauze roughly the size and shape of toilet paper. To Robin’s surprise, a box appeared when he touched them.

Linens of the Mad Scientist These linens are the special toiletry of a Mad Scientist, and as such, are not intended for those of sound mind to use. When used on a wound, the wound may recover up to 6 body per use. There are 10 uses per roll. Larger wounds may take more uses. In addition, if the linens are applied by a user with the Mad Science skill, a mutation may be triggered. The chance and severity of mutation rises based upon the Mad Science skill of the user.

Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings.

  He dismissed the box. Mutation? Does that mean like the X-Men, or like the Toxic Avenger? Robin stared at the linens. They looked normal enough. Robin set them aside and reached for the last thing in the box, a multitool. This looked normal enough. Robin read the box that appeared when he touched it.

Anytool (Apprentice) The Anytool may become any tool with which the user has familiarity. The Anytool grants a +1 bonus to any Crafting skill in which it is used for a significant part of the crafted object’s construction. The Anytool will release a large amount of heat when a transformation is triggered, to which the user is not immune.

  This looked useful. Maybe it can become a sword, Robin thought idly. A sudden scalding on his hand forced him to drop the anytool. Robin shook his thankfully only slightly-singed hand and stared at the anytool as it burst into flames. The flames spread out from the anytool, then rapidly began to clear. When they had fully vanished a machete was left behind.

  “Huh. Guess a sword isn’t a tool, according to the anytool.”

  The mantis two two quick scurries of motion across the ceiling at the sound of Robin’s voice. Robin cringed and froze. It looked like it was about to jump on him again. At least the Bug Taming skill might level up, right? He forced himself to look at the mantis and gently said “...go ahead.”

  The mantis stared down at him, showing no response to his words. Robin sighed and turned around, only for the mantis to immediately leap onto his back, climbing to his shoulder before Robin had fully realized what happened.

  Robin had thought it would be better to have it on his shoulder, when it was on his head. He had not considered that now he could directly see the orchid mantis, with all of the claws and sharp pieces of body that were a direct warning from Nature to stay away. Robin turned his head slowly to fully look at it. It was staring right at him, unmoving except for tiny twitches of its antennae. Robin looked for a moment, and then slowly approached the other cabinet.

  This one likely wasn’t going to contain much. Before ...all of this, it had just held a massive industrial bulk roll of heavy-duty trash bags. One of those might be useful for carrying this loot, though. He snickered internally at the phrase “loot.” He pulled it open, being careful not to disturb the mantis. When he saw that it was almost empty, his heart dropped. Then he saw a small leather backpack, similar to the tiny ones that girls wore as purses. Groaning internally, he reached out to touch it.

Satchel of the Generous Matron

Once per day, a single protein bar, fiber bar, nutrient bar, a single piece of hard candy, or a single coin may be removed from the satchel. The value and mintage of the coin is random. The satchel may contain up to 25 cubic feet of items. The items must be able to fit through the opening of the satchel.

  This one would be useful, even if he would feel weird using it… but did it have to look like a purse?