BRIARETH
“Faladel’s been off recently, don’t you think?” I begin, turning to the queen as her husband quietly casts the spell that will protect us from any magical interference.
“Yes, and it’s been worse since you arrived back with him from your day off. What did you do to him, Briareth?” She asks, a cold glint in her eye.
“Nothing!” I protest. When she gets all serious like this, she scares me somewhat.
“You know how close they are dear, I’m sure it wasn’t on purpose.” The King breaks in.
“But I didn’t do anything, well, except escort the drunk dude home, but that didn’t cause this!”
“He got drunk?!” The queen exclaimed, obviously worried. “No wonder he’s been so stressed, what were the both of you thinking–!” I flinch, suddenly understanding her confusion. Whoopsies! Bad word choice.
“Wait.” The King puts a steadying hand on her shoulder. “Faladel knows better than to get drunk. Also, I’ve never heard Briareth call him ‘dude’ before.” The queen calms down slightly but is still staring at me suspiciously.
“His majesty is right,” I assure her, “neither of us got drunk, it was one of my neighbors. He’s an idiot who said some… rather cruel things. I think Faladel took them to heart. Which is why he’s currently like this. But he’s been off since before that. It’s like something in him changed after we got back from making peace. I think you might be putting too much pressure on him.”
The king sighs and the queen shakes her head. “We’ve not been putting the pressure on him nearly as much as he puts it on himself.” The King explains. “The recent test? He asked for it. It hadn’t originally been in his curriculum. He had us make it, and then studied for it relentlessly. As if it was a way to prove himself.”
“We’ve talked with him about it, but nothing seems to get through. I’ve told him book learning isn’t going to help him learn to rule better at this point, but that just meant he tried to do the same amount of book work as well as sit in on all the meetings and take notes.” The Queen elaborates quietly. “He knows we worry, but he says he can handle it. And so we just been left watching as he struggles to find his own way.” She stops, and I realize that the shine in her eyes has changed from wrath to unshed tears. Her husband puts a comforting arm around her.
“Why don’t you just talk to him again?” I ask, “Tell him he’s doing too much, or that it’s fine if he lets go of a few things, or even just that he doesn’t have to take over after you.” I pause, surprised by my own brilliance. “Yeah, if he doesn’t feel the pressure from that area, then it truly does become his own will driving him so he might feel like he’s letting less people down who he cares about. That one might actually work!”
“You think we haven’t tried?!” The King retorts, and quiets down as his wife puts a hand on his arm. “We’ve made it known to him that it doesn’t matter to us. Of course, we’d love it if someone as responsible and level headed as Faladel took over after we’re gone. But he’s not the only person in the world suited to such a role. In fact, I’m afraid he’s particularly unsuited. He’ll drown in it.” As he continues, almost all of his earlier vehemence fades. “The only reason I survived after I took control is because of my beloved Eliyen here. She told me she'd be the serious one, and I could be as silly as I like, as long as I never did anything too flippant during the council meetings. Without her, I would have cracked under all my duties. However, Faladel doesn’t have a personality that would allow him to hide behind ridiculousness when things get too stifling, much less a partner to help him handle everything.
“He has me.”
The Queen blinks silently, and the King studies me closely. “As far as I am aware Briareth Herbalar, you and my son don’t share that sort of relationship.” He says in a slightly chilling tone. “Have the two of you been keeping things from us?”
“Faladel and I?! What? NO! We’re not in that sort of relationship.” Somehow, I manage to blanch and blush furiously at the same time. It makes me feel vaguely light headed. “I just meant I’d be there for him when he takes over, you know? Through thick and thin.”
“Well that’s a relief.” The King mutters, and I’m not sure which part he’s replying to.
“He does seem less scripted when you’re around.” The Queen says softly. “I think the two of you are good for each other.”
I blink in confusion. Faladel is good for me? Where did that come from?
The King nods in agreement. “He seems… lighter when you are around. And you seem more steady.” I mentally shrug. However they got to that conclusion, I have no clue, but it makes my next request much easier.
“I’ve noticed that when he’s traveling on adventures with me, he’s more carefree. More himself. More person, and less wooden responses.” I begin slowly, trying to find the right words. “A long journey, an adventure with low stress that will give him time to figure things out, might be just what he needs. He’s smart, smarter than me for sure. If we can give him a space with no judgment, surely he’ll realize that his current workload, his current–” I hesitate, workload wasn’t right, not really. “–actions” I finally settle on “are unsustainable. He’ll make a change, adjust his style. He’ll figure it out, if we can give him the time and space to do so.”
“Alright, Briareth, what do you have in mind?” The King asks with a knowing smile.
“I’m so glad you asked.” I say, snagging my satchel which stores all the paperwork I brought with me from a table. Quickly I lay out my maps and notes. Outside of the dwarven and elvish territories, I’ve left plenty of room, with only a giant question mark. I gesture towards the open space. “I want to go here.”
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“Off the edge of the world?” The king seems vaguely amused. “I fear that is impossible even for you Briareth, you know as well as I do, previous exploration has confirmed that there is only an endless void out there. No land, no sky, no sea. The mountains just end. Everyone who has tried to go further has fallen off the edge and never returned.”
“See, that’s where you’re wrong.” I say, tapping at my notes on our conversation with the Librarian. “My source tells me that there is a path to an outside world, and that he has guided people there before.”
“Your source?” The King asks, searching my face steadily with his golden eyes.
“The librarian who keeps a record of all history. You sent us to meet him to find out what started the war. He had mentioned it in passing, and if you allow us to return, I bet I could get him to tell us where it is.”
“Let me get this straight.” The queen breaks in. “Your source is an ancient, insane elf, with a twisted sense of humor that causes him to set deadly traps for all his visitors, who mentioned this in passing over seven years ago.”
“When you put it like that…” I hesitate. It really doesn’t sound great and Faladel’s parents look at each other.
The Queen nods, and the King says. “Alright Briareth, you have our permission. Plan your trip. We’ll find a way to make Faladel go with you. Even if your source was just rambling nonsense, at least it will give Faladel some time to think about his future away from prying eyes.”
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FALADEL
I can’t hear everything of course. Most of it is muffled in fact. But I can hear enough to distinguish three very separate voices. Two are my parents, and the other is Briareth. They are talking about me. Having a private meeting about me. Without telling me. My first instinct is to walk on in and ask them about it, but… I can’t. Something inside me says they won’t tell me. There was a reason I wasn’t invited.
I instinctively quell my hurt and indignation. There will be time for that later. Now however… I press my ear to the door silently, surprised that none of them thought to put up anti-eavesdropping spells. Those don’t work on the new watchers that lie broken behind me of course, but they are still standard for any secret meetings between the Royals and their vassals. Perhaps this is an informal meeting and they forgot? Or perhaps since the enchanted watchers came out there has not been as much need for that sort of spell.
Either way, a mistake on their part and one I’m going to take full advantage of.
“He’s been off since before… too much pressure.” Briareth says. It doesn’t take much brainwork to figure out who they’re talking about.
“He puts it on himself.” Father retorts. “...He asked for it… had us make it… a way to prove himself.” I strain to hear more, going so far as to holding my breath, but I’m still missing too much. Were they talking about my recent test? Is it just my imagination, or was there some disdain in those words? Did they disapprove of my initiative? Or was it the results that were unsatisfactory?
I knew I got number seven wrong. But surely that isn’t the point of this conversation.
“We’ve talked with him about it, but nothing seems… I’ve told him… going to help him…. rule better at this point…” My mouth drops open. More is said after that, but I can’t hear it over my shock. Mother sounds like she’s trying to explain it to Briareth, but what I really need is for her to explain it to me. Nothing can help me at this point? I don’t remember any conversations like that. Surely I missed something important here, or perhaps it is just that my memory has grown very selective of late. “He says he can handle it…he struggles to find his own way.” She stops. And all the sound disappears for a bit into senseless murmuring.
“...just talk to him again?” Briareth asks, of course he’s the first one to be loud enough to understand. I roll my eyes gently and smile. “Tell him…” He fades out and I can’t hear him until he shouts triumphantly, “That one might actually work!” I frown slightly, staring into the dark woodgrains of the door. Work how exactly?
“You think we haven’t tried?!” Father shouts back. “We’ve made it known to him…doesn’t matter to us.” I flinch away from the door at the vehemence in those words. What doesn’t matter? I don’t matter? I return to my former position as quickly as possible, but I’ve already missed something. “...we’d love it if someone… responsible and levelheaded… took over after we’re gone…. Not the only person… I’m afraid he’s particularly unsuited. He’ll drown in it.” His voice drops lower and there is a long pause. I think I’m holding my breath. I can’t make heads or tails of the first bit, but the ending was rather obvious. They don’t think I’m good enough? Even my parents don’t want me taking the throne? Something inside me cracks slightly.
I thought they had my back.
Slowly, carefully, I pull away from the door. I don’t want to hear anything more. I don’t think I’d be able to accept it. I need to take some time. Process all that I’ve heard, not jump to any conclusions. Although, I can’t help some that have already formed.
I pad silently away, not back the way I came, but onwards, towards my rooms. The last thing I need is to be around people right now. I might not be able to control my face.
Although a moreose thought creeps in, is there really a point anymore? If those closest to me don’t think I’m good enough, why would anyone else? Maybe I should just give up and let everyone see what a disappointment I am. How flawed. How unreliable. How unsuitable.
No! I shake my head in a silent denial. My parents and Briareth might have confirmed my worst fears about myself. But that doesn’t mean everybody has realized it yet.
A board creaks beneath my feet, and I resist the urge to run away. I’m scared of being seen when I’m vulnerable like this, but running would just make more noise. If I’m lucky, they won’t have noticed yet. I don’t want to alert them. I’m only a few feet away from the nearest turn. So, instead of running, I just keep walking. Steadily and silently padding forwards, paying less attention to my scattered thoughts and more to the floor in front of me, on the lookout for creaky boards. As if nothing happened. As if I’m perfectly fine. The only change is my extra caution. I won’t let myself be found out.
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BRIARETH
There is a soft creaking noise from the hallway outside. It isn’t like the normal creak of tree branches, or settling wood. No, it’s a footsteps on floorboards creak, and we all freeze for a few seconds. I can hear only my breath and my heartbeat. Did someone overhear us? Is someone listening in now? After a few seconds of nothing, the king silently goes over and checks the doorway. He opens it quickly, but there is no one out there. The hallway is deserted.
I turn to the queen, almost ready to be done with this meeting, “One last thing, I believe you have my mongoose.”
“Your mongoose?” She raises her eyebrow. “I thought Albreth went where he wished. I certainly haven’t been holding him captive. If he hasn’t returned to you, perhaps you weren’t treating him right.”
I gape at her. Convincing her to give back my mongoose was supposed to be the easy part after a difficult conversation about Faladel, however, it looks like the two have swapped places, and we are going to be here a lot longer than I originally estimated.