"Of all the--"
Victoria's tight fist strains against the desire to smash into something and, instead, lands gently on the meeting table, only giving off the slightest thud that fades into the vardo's space.
Almost twelve hours had passed since The Vanishing and a whole day remained until they would return. Victoria shakes her head, wondering if the Halfling knew about it as well.
The Mind Frame picture before her couldn't have come at a worse moment and with terrible news. Approaching from the south, through the Denagrin Plains, over a hundred Hobgoblins march in groups of nine or so. As clear as the picture is, so many greenish grey-skinned warriors milling about the grassy landscape makes it difficult to get an accurate count. Behind them is a cloud of dust that reaches for the sky, barely concealing three, massive and familiar figures.
Bones connect to bones that have no business being connected at all. Ribs, spines, femurs, arm bones, and so many others are bound in shapes to create long, craning necks and bodies so very unlike the ones they originally formed. Three sets of three, tree trunk sized necks stem from wide, slinking bodies and hold up gnarled, draconic heads, snarling and snapping at the very air itself.
If he has enough bones for three Skeletal Hydras, there has to be a significant force of Skeleton Soldiers as well, even though they can't be seen in the image Conner sent. And if Plisk is right, there should be an overhelming number of them. Well, if Linqs was under the watch of a lesser commander then such an army would seem overwhelming indeed. With all the defenses and efforts set in place, Victory's hand no longer seems out of reach.
Vic reaches her own hand to her ear, deftly brushing the Whisper Ear Cuff to activate it, "Sonny? Sonny can you hear me?"
Nothing.
"Elsbeth, Boulder, Driftwood's forces are already on the move through the planes. We need to mobilize now. Before we send Squads Gold and Electrum and their escorts to their forward positions as well as getting Electrum ready in Kes Mudd, I need all available fighting units to gather in front of the Town Hall. I need to form a War Party."
"Yes, Lieutenant," Boulder answers, the grin obvious in his growling voice.
The Whisper Cuff doesn't work mentally like the War Party chat Ability so she couldn't hear Elsbeth's response, but she didn't need to. Victoria's oldest friend had been awaiting orders in the general workshop, fletching bolts for the repeating crossbows and creating specialty spears for her ballista. Once the call came through, she packed up, geared out, and took off for her assigned position. Her heart raced at the prospect of the upcoming battle. Thoughts of the vicious hobs, unrelenting undead, and smug Halfling pulled her heart strings as taut as a three hundred pound draw longbow, and only her opponents' utter defeat will bring her sweet release.
At the same time, Boulder wrangles all the soldiers, including Gorm, who will be leading the reserve units in The Keep. With only Gorm, Conner, Reiger, Plisk, and himself left of the original seven soldiers loyal to their Lieutenant, they wouldn't be able to form much of a line especially against the numbers coming to crash against their walls. However, four of them were to lead two Kobolds from Squads Gold or Electrum, they could form four distinct guerrilla parties bent on disruption and devastation. It's too bad Squad Mithral went with Sonny, all of their help would be of great use on the battlefield right about now.
Adding all Kobold squad leaders, soldiers, reserves, Elsbeth, Kona, Serenity, and Corvina into a single War Party will allow Victoria to perform two-way mental communication.
She sends everyone out to prepare and she does the same, going back to the vardo to pick out her outfit and toys to play with.
Victoria stands in her undergarments, aside from her two rings and halo, appraising her new set of equipment next to the old. The black, Terror of Many set has served her well enough, but, for now, its main weakness is the lack of other wearers. Had there been hundreds of soldiers wearing the same armor, it would, of course, be a different story. But the new set of armor, a six piece set using the Terror's blueprints, greyladium and wraithsteel ingots, and Nightmare leather, has no such handicap. The dark wraithsteel counteracts the natural radiance of the greyladium, making it a matte, light grey instead. Dawn uses the same set and used turquoise paint to decorate hers with a small anvil being hit by a Thunderstruck over her chest, pinstripe lines down the sides, and her last name across the shoulders of her cuirass. Inspired, many others did the same, including Victoria.
After donning a black, long-sleeved, padded gambeson, a kind of jacket meant to be worn on its own or underneath armor that would otherwise be uncomfortable on its own, she picks up her own cuirass to equip it. Made from Infernal Canvas and down from the Harpy Matriarch, the gambeson adds a decent amount of Armor, makes the cuirass quite bearable, and keeps out the cold rather well. The other five pieces of the armor set are already equipped and she holds up the OverChest piece to scrutinizing eyes. It may be the only piece of the set with an actual Set Bonus, but that bonus is quite…
[Penumbral Vanguard Cuirass. Advanced Expert. OverChest. 6/6
[Durability: 440/440
[Armor: 19
[+2% Resistance to all damage
[Set Bonus: Every time the wearer reduces a target to 0HP, increase damage dealt by wearer and healing effects targeting wearer by 1% for 3minutes. Max 10%. Each effect resets after the 3minutes.]
Over the left side of the cuirass' chest area is a flaming blue skull that's become quite a popular emblem, especially among the Kobolds for some reason. It replaced the blue wolf mask, though a few of the children still sport it. Where Dawn has her last name on the back, Vic got someone else to paint a pair of outstretched wings. She knew that painting wasn't her strong suit, as Kona has enjoyed teasing every chance she gets. Over her arms are the insignias of her officer ranking, a heater shield with two arrows laying over it at an angle from top right to bottom left.
Unfortunately for Dawn, before she could assign clever names to the armor sets, the other crafters working on them chose a more practical route. The Penumbral Vanguard set is meant for main fighters and tanks, designed to help them push harder and longer on the front lines.
A lighter set, the Penumbral Strider set, was mostly made with leathers, Infernal Cloth, and scales of greyladium and was issued to the archers and rogues. The all metal bracers were replaced with mostly leather, the paldrons with rugged cloaks, and the cuirass with a brigandine style OverChest armor piece. This set increases Dexterity as well as the wearer's attack range. So, regardless if a rogue had any sort of training in ranged weapons, like darts, shuriken, or even bows, they could at least attempt to use them and reach a further distance, which in itself is useful.
For the casters, they took a lot of influence from several sources: a wide-brimmed hat styled after Kona's Hedge Mage's Hat, a tailcoat like the one made for Ardacen's Corsair set as well as his Eldritch Soldier leather bracers, enchanted fingerless gloves, and leather greaves. Instead of the billowing robe of a regular caster, and especially after seeing the success of the likes of Ardacen, the Tailors came to the conclusion that that style is far more functional in combat. It gave off an air of "military academy dress code" and everyone seemed to like it. Kona, however, was able to commission a coat that still gave her the set bonuses.
Instead of the Victorian-esque tailcoat, the Tailors crafted a knee length, skirted coat with lace edges along the bottom and at the ends of her long, flared sleeves. It still has the same color palette, but differentiates itself in its unique, feminine charms. Underneath this she still wears tight, black pants that hug her like leggings and her Released Eldritch Soldier Tunic. This made riding her Flying Broom far easier to do than in a long robe or dress. Her new hat has holes for her ears to poke out of, a purely aestheic choice, but a cute one none the less. When she is standing next to Serenity, who chooses to wear the standard tailcoat along with a new eyepatch that matches the uniform, one would think they were a well coordinated couple ready to win a costume contest.
The Penumbral Canto set gives a moderate increase in Max MP and Willpower, the Hedge Mage's Hat's bonus effect of allowing Spells costing 5MP or lower to be cast for free, as well as a slight increase in Spell range except for those based on touch. Also, the new tailcoat means the healers and mages will have a look that doesn't immediately paint them as casters, a welcome bonus in large scale combat. While they still couldn't exactly wade into the middle of battle, with the set they would certainly have an easier time skirting the edges of the front lines, dishing out healing, buffs, hexes, and ranged DPS.
All in all, the cool grey, radiant black, and striking turquiose colors have a very uniform feel. While the previous all-black, umbramium-based equipment looked cool and edgy, this new gear gives everyone a stronger sense of community. They wear the colors of their town and the personal touches of the armor give everyone a solid moral boost. Moral isn't something quantified, kind of like Luck or Potential, but like the other two Stats it's far better to have more rather than less.
Given that all sets are based around their OverChest piece, everyone needed to wear something underneath. And, if people didn't want to wear a gambeson, they still had the Released Eldritch Soldier Tunics equipped as their UnderChest armor due, in large part, to the White Flame I reaction Spell. It may work best on those who dropped a bunch of points into Arcane, but the tunic does give a miniscule +2 bonus to Arcane and sometimes an extra 2HP could mean the difference between life and death. For now, even the regular citizens, the non-combatants, wore it, styled to their liking. Just in case.
Cuirass, pauldrons, bracers, helmet, greaves, and boots equipped, Victoria glances at the full array of weapons spread out before her, fidgetting with the storage ring on her right hand. Her heart flutters for a moment, eyes darting from weapon to weapon and all the other pieces of equipment in between. As one would do in a field of wildflowers, she artfully and methodically picks out her battle bouquet.
"Ace. Memory. Thunderstruck. A few of the new, odd darts Rachel uses--"
[Burst of Unkindness. Advanced Journeyman Weapon. Dart
[Durability: 75/75
[Dexterity/Melee, Throwable/1
[Base Damage: 5
[If thrown, this weapon explodes (dealing 100 Durability damage to itself) and creates an Area of Effect 5ft in radius. Deal Arcane Total to everything within range. 70% chance to inflict Frightened Debuff for 2minutes.]
"--Gods, they give their weapons such strange names... One of the new scotum shields--"
[Scotum Shield of Horde Guard. Advanced Apprentice Armor. Shield.
[Durability: 350/350
[Armor: 7
[-3% to weapon based damage for every hostile targeting the weilder of this shield. Max -15%.]
"--Spectral Bow and fifty splinters."
She picks up one of the new, single-edge swords she used in the dungeon to view its description.
[Guarding Dwarven Longsword. Enhanced Journeyman Weapon. One-Handed Sword.
[Durability: 300/300
[Strength/Melee/1
[Base Damage: 15
[+3Armor]
After storing the rest of her weapons that won't be seeing combat in one of the crates, she takes out a second Dwarven Longsword and tosses it into her ring with the other. It worked well in the dungeon. Victoria tries once more for Sonny, but still gets no reply. She checks her personal stock of potions and, satisfied, heads out to the Town Square and thinks about The Grey Lady. It finally occurs to her that Dawn, Rachel, and Lavina are the only ones who can draw and lower her and the only one even close to being able to help now is currently on a mission to find and return an airship with Mika, Sonny, and Squad Mithril. Also, with the Travelers gone, the list of available defensive forces is that much shorter and plans must be modified until their return.
After everyones' departure, Gorm leads a handful of people in their preperations, as per designs left behind by Dawn. First, they fully locked down the portcullis. Then, they used Ground Shift to cover the facade of the entryway with earth and rock, blending it into the walls of the pass. There's no time to block the entrance of the pass like they had originally planned, so now the hope is that the enemy simply passes by on their march. If not, they'll still have to make it through several layers of defenses.
***************
If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.
Dez Driftwood stares lovingly at the four skeletal horses pulling his chariot. He was a little late in picking up the tiered Spell Basic Necromancy in his haste to learn the more powerful Spells, but once he reached its third tier and gained Create Undead, Minor, he could use bones to create certain kinds of simple animals. They can't be large beasts like Dire Wolves or Badger Bears, but things like horses and medium-sized dogs still have their uses. Behind and on his flanks are the dozens of ten foot tall warrior Giant Skeletons he crafted to be his personal guards, along with three squads of ten Archer Skeletons equipped with simple bows and poisoned arrows.
Beyond the sight of his own little platoon is the battalion of over three hundred Skeleton Soldiers, each armed with a bone gladius and wooden shield. Each one of them is linked to the Necromancer's will and doesn't need any other form of leadership. Dez certainly couldn't trust those brainless hobs to lead his army. As of right now, he didn't know who he could trust.
They couldn't even do something as simple as gather as many bones as they could in the immediate area or to find out why their biggest hunting party disappeared without a trace. Then, he got that Mind Frame from the scouting party before they all died. It was a simple picture of a group of disconcertingly well equipped Kobolds attacking the Scouts with surgical precision. Just past them, hidden partially by the vegetation, was a handful of people.
Although Dez himself couldn't recognize them, one of the Travelers who had joined up with him was able to identify the black, grey, and turquiose of their outfits with those of the citizens who, not too long ago, swept through and created an uproar in Kes Solomas, with their uniquely crafted items and explosively popular resteraunt. Fortunately for Dez, this kind of popularity led to investigative actions by interested parties and their connection with certain well liked, or hated depending on who you asked, Travelers. The leaders of which, turned out to be a short, dark blue Infernus with ram-like horns who weilds a strange weapons and an odd, Blue Mage with a head lit in sapphire blue flames and clothes that looked more suited to a life out at sea.
The second, of course, is the man who Dez has come to hate, to loathe with a thriving passion.
All Dez wanted to do was develop his powers and grow his army, a simple enough venture for a Necromancer with access to The Book of Shadows. Bones for his army were easy enough to obtain, though most of the meat encasing it seemed reluctant to give it up. Even as a Butcher in his former home town, he scowled as he was forced to handle the fibrous muscles or sloppy organs a majority of the time. He hated the messy flesh and all that it entailed.
The second part, often difficult for anyone to do solo, Legendary item or not, became as crystal clear as the solution itself. After discovering the intoxicating power granted by the Life Crystals from Travelers, as well as the bonus of creating and leveling the Boss Feat that greatly increases his base Stats after killing them, Dez's carefree wandering days gave way to a desire for more, ever more. He jumped through two, second quarter levels due to Life Crystals alone, something not so simple considering the XP needs that grow ever longer with each level especially after the first twenty-five levels. And when he ran out of Travelers to kill along the way, he learned that if one were to bind one to his services and allow them to sleep safely enough times, their souls would be bound to the area around the newly reclaimed tower.
The first death after this discovery was taken as a sort of "work-site accident" what with all the aggressive Hobgoblins running around, trying to prepare for war. The second time, however, was blatant and after much dissent and arguing over what really happened, three of the four Travelers were imprisoned in the tower's basement oubliette, a kind of deep dungeon with a hole in the ceiling where prisoners are dropped into and no other way out. Stripped of their gear and drained of their MP and SP using enchanted manacles found in the room above the oubliette, the Travelers were killed several times until the XP given by their Life Crystals wasn't worth the effort.
By then, it had taken hold. A fiery grip like a fist of molten iron had wrapped its burning fingers around the base of the Halfling's brain and around his heart strings. Gaining levels and growing his army have always been his main goals. But now, a new step above and beyond them had surfaced, leading him up the path of greatness, of true power. Raising his Stats, expanding his Ability list, swelling his army, sprawling his territory all of these things and more meant only one thing to Dez.
More.
More Life Crystals.
That's what Dez wants. It's what he needs. What he craves. Everything he has now, everything he does, and everything he has planned have become nothing but tools for obtaining those shards of life energy. When he grips one in his hand, squeezing slowly until all at once it feels completely unbreakable and utterly fragile. He shudders at the memory of every, single one, as they pulsed with energy and somehow shrieked in his hand before th crystals shattered and the cloud of dust entered his body through pores, eyes, nostrils, anywhere it could. It invaded him, invigorated him, filled him with fresh knowledge and raw power.
He found a way to get more, and a being as strong as Winters should have one hell of a Life Crystal. Full of his memories, experiences, emotions. His hopes and dreams. The thought of crushing it in his fist sends a cold shiver up Dez's spine, but another thought quickly ignites an ember of anger.
The Vanishing.
Had he known about the Vanishing sooner, Dez would have mobilized his army a long time ago, but that simpering rat mage, Billy, only told him about it an hour or so before it was supposed to happen. That was just about thirteen hours ago. His troops marched off as quickly as they could, wasting four to get fully organized and mobilized. They traveled through the Tombshadow Woods and Denegrin Plains on their way to the unnamed valley where the Scouts were killed.
They had to be there. And, if he could get there before the return, he could prepare a little welcome home party for the villian who deserves his just reward for attempting to get in the way of his progress. The antagonist, the true villain of this narration.
Riding along side the chariot, atop a skeletal horse of his own, Angus Elder strums absent mindedly on his mithril guitar as he stares at the Halfling gripping the reins, knuckles fit to split open. Though shocked at first to find himself in the predicament in the Lich's Tower, with hardly a single memory to recall, it didn't take long for him to readjust himself. He could see past the level of crazy Dez had put forth as a sort of defense mechanism, to the lonely and caring person he truly is. That Dez, however, seemed to have been left on the side of some long forgotten road and a new one had come to replace him.
Angus had warned Dez about the dangers of abusing the Life Crystals, but the arguments he presented regarding their plans made sense in a way. Had they a fast and safe way of becoming stronger, they would have taken it. And, unsure whether out of greed or concern over his friend, Dez didn't let Angus use half as many of the Crystals. Although an itch for them did slowly develop, it wasn't anything like the need he saw in the Halflings eyes most of the time.
He let out a deep sigh, spurred the boney sides of his steed and continued to ride along side the only person he could call friend.
***************
"So," Sonny asks, hands on her hips and head cocked slightly, "What you're saying is we got everything BUT the navigation fixed?"
"No, no! Not at all." Lavina wipes her brow with her handkerchief and simply tosses it into her storage ring. She slaps an empty spot on the main control panel, "This baby is fully functional and under our complete control."
"So what's the hold up?"
Lavina whinces and shrugs her shoulders, looking over at Mika who responds with gruff resignation, "The only way we could get it working is if we used an earlier setting than the one it was on before the ship went ti-- er…" The Dwarf catches her words as the Machina shoots her a withering look.
"--Before the major malfunction." Her correction still doesn't seem to answer Sonny's question so she continues explaining with a deep sigh. "It means all logs and information has been reset to before the airship took off and it's practically factory new now."
"What a waste." Sonny looks over at Dola, sleeping off his motion sickness in a bedroll. The other Kobolds were organizing the remains of what used to be the only functioning canon on board, gutted to help repair the control panel.
Lavina strokes the panel with her fingertips and stares wistfully at the slowly turning blank, magic globe of Arc, "It is. There was so much history, so much we could have learned about the sky sailors and what happened leading up to us finding it. All gone. And that includes the maps. That's what we were trying to say. No map, no way to tell how to get home."
Mika shakes her downcast head, placing a hand on Lavina's shoulder.
Sonny pauses for a good, long moment, patiently waiting to see if they had anything else to add. She could hear giggling from the Kobolds, and when she turns to see what they are up to she finds they had used the pieces to create a kind of step stool and are taking turns playing with the wheel. They weren't turning it enough to change course, but it was still fun for them to do so. Sonny motions for the two Tinkerers to follow her and she guides them between the wheel and control panel. The Kobolds move to make way for them, but Sonny smiles at them, motioning them to stay.
"Do either of you know how to work the panel?" Lavina nods and Sonny directs her back behind it. "Mika. Do you have access to your personal map?"
"Of course, but--" The sudden, yet simple realization dawns on her, her face growing wide with comprehension. Still, this doesn't stop Sonny as she shakes her head in disappointment.
"Please… Take us home?" She asks, holding back a grin and tamping down a fit of laughter.
In between the frustrated shouts of accusation from the Dwarf toward the panicked Faunus, Mika gives the helms-kobold directions and they cut through the clouds with ease. Soon, they'll be in range for Sonny to hail Victoria over the Whisper Cuff to give her the good news.
***************
Even though I've been jogging alongside Catus, Arc's deity of time in the form of a giant snail, for quite a while I don't feel any sort of fatigue. My muscles feel as fresh as they would after a good, long rest, I'm not sweating, though I don't ever recall doing so in the game, and my breathing and heart rate all seem nominal. His glistening and writhing body glides across the invisible surface that seems to have no correlation with what the rest of our senses are perceiving.
Our figures are hovering in the air, high above a tower jutting out of a clearing made in a dark, dense forest. There are dozens upon dozens of tents, makeshift structures, fire pits, and impromptu crafting areas. The flames are frozen in place, licking at massive cauldrons filled with what looks like bubbling, grey glue. I can see racks of bone and leather based equipment, armor sporting the white, bony hand of Dez Driftwood, Linqs' public enemy number one. A large patch of nearby land, however, seems devoid of any kind of activity. No structures, no racks, no firepits, trees, or vegetation of any kind. Just a rectangular swatch of dirt and rock.
"That must be where he keeps his undead army…" I grumble to myself, my voice almost catching on the last word. Just by looking at the size of the rectangle, and guessing how much space an adult person can take, I estimate a force somewhere in the four hundreds, and that doesn't include the tribe of Hobgoblins and any other allies he might have convinced to join him. How did he even get so close to us? Again? Is Arc really that small or is it something else?
[The Abandoned Tower of the Lich Lord. After so long, another caster weilding power over the undead has stumbled across its doorstep.]
"Any advice on how I can end his little boat ride down the river?"
[Alas, that kind of advice is neither available for me to give away, nor is it my place to do so. Even Brother Azrael cannot give Travelers advice in ways to end the lives of Arceans. It is not our place to play judge and jury.]
"Even if the little bastard killed scores of other Arceans? Or plans to kill hundreds more?"
[That is a job for Pravdera and her Marduks. I recall her having quite the distaste for Necromancers after the war between her followers and the previous Lich Lord. Maybe, if you have a way to do so, there might be a way for you to be granted a boon by the goddess?]
"Maybe…" Our jog is just shy of a run now. My entire body is dark and encompassed with shadows, blocking the view of anything behind it. "When can I get back in the g-- back to Arc?"
[Nearly there. We must acclimate you slowly or you might experience an uncomfortable disconnect between mind and body. You do enjoy having your limbs behaving according to your mind's impulses, yes?]
"That… sounds like something I would enjoy, yes. By the way, how long has it been?"
[That is going to be a bit tricky to answer. Relatively speaking, it has only been maybe an hour or so for us. However…]
"Tell me I've been in here for a year or more and I'm going to quit moving right now."
A deep resounding laugh from the snail deity shakes my bones and rattles my teeth. Hands shoot up and instinctively cover my ears, though the effort is useless.
[No, nothing as extreme as that. Well… it must be obvious that it's been longer than an hour.]
"How… long…?" My tone is curt as I roll my eyes.
[It would be enough to say that you are already fifteen hours late for rentry into Arc.]
"Fifteen hours?" I growl, not that I could tell the difference between several seconds and several days in this place. Plus, Catus and I have been engaging in enjoyable conversation. Maybe that's why time sort of flew right by. I misstep in the haze of my frustration, stumble, and dance about until I find the jogging rhythm again, continuing to keep pace. My hands find my temples, rubbing them so I can relieve some slow building pain and my eyes squint from the cranial discomfort.
[We are on schedule, if that's any sort of consolation to you.]
Three of his eyestalks look forward, the fourth stays focused on me. If he thinks I'm planning on reacting badly to his news, he might be right. I consider it for a split second, but common sense tells me he's my only ticket back into the game and I don't want to mess up the progress this far.
"How long are we going to be doing this?" My hands drop to my sides with a slap. My fingers discover the cool leather and hard umbrium scales of my Reinforced Corsair Tailcoat. I look down and am pleased to see the rest of my in-game clothes. I try to activate Arcane Bolt, but nothing happens.
[Not long, Ardacen. Nearly there.]
I could hear the smirk in his voice as I inspect my clothes. The pace, I notice, has increased in speed and I move to match it.
***************
Ric's fists plead almost desperately with Ardacen's door, begging for entry. He calls once more, but only silence answers. He shakes his head at Dawn and the hallway seems to expand, compounding a feeling of lonliness. It shrinks back down at the sound of two people approaching. The male pushes a thin laptop cart and the female points frantically at the screen while speaking loudly.
"See? I told you it wouldn't work, but it's too late now. We just have to let Ardacen run his course and hope he gets back into the game without having an aneurysm."
Shocked by the words, Richter and Dawn freeze in place in front of the door and the two newcomers suddenly register their presence. It takes a moment before anyone speaks and Richter clears his throat to get the ball rolling.
"You… mentioned Ardacen? Is he okay?" He points his eyes and shurgs a shoulder at the door's direction.
Erin pops an eyebrow up and places defiant hands on her hips, "And you are-- What? His family?" She gives him the once over, but cocks her head at the vague familiarity of Dawn.
Richter gives her his best real estate agent smile and extends his hand, "Richter Pryce. I'm a friend of his."
Arthur tentatively gives it a shake, but a sudden realization washes over Erin. One of her hands covers a mute scream as the other points at one then the other.
"Ri-- Ri-- Richter? And that means you're--" Dawn smiles, waiting for her to finish. Having just had the same jarring moment with Richter, who she still forgets doesn't have pointy ears and platinum blonde hair.
Dawn waves her hands, placating Erin, "We just wanted to make sure Ardy and his mom are okay. Would you happen to know if he quit or not?"
Once again, Erin's expression turns on a dime and she sinks her chin down, crossing her arms over her chest, "Well… the thing is…"