Jude was tense. He could feel it in his shoulders as he lined up his shot. With a deep breath, he released an arrow. It skewered a pigeon picking at the carcass of a cat, slumped against a toppled bin. He trudged across the masses of rubbish and debris and scooped it up nonchalantly. He wrapped it in plastic and dropped it into his bag.

He stared vacantly at the spiralling tower of frozen waste that climbed away toward the low clouds. He thought Zuri was different. He remembered their first meeting. She was perfect, and her smile could break a thousand hearts. That day, he shot a pigeon out of the sky and caught it before it hit the ground, a feat he’d attempted countless times but never successfully. His delight that he finally managed it whilst she watched him was immeasurable.

The following weeks had been a dream. He adored everything about Zuri. Most of all, she was smart and fiery and ferociously witty. They had joked back and forth, laughing the time away. But when she degraded the addicts and treated the unfortunate with contempt, it saddened him to his core. He convinced himself it was Dawson’s ways poisoning her, and he truly believed that she was a good person at heart. He just needed to free her from her father’s control. Help her see the world through less devious and cynical eyes.

He sighed, releasing the tension that had built up in his chest. He walked back across the waste ground to Zuri, who was sitting on the wall where they had first met.

“I’m really sorry, Jude,” she said with meaning. “It’s just my way. My dad hates Crocheads.” She shook her head in frustration. “Sorry, I mean addicts.” She pulled Jude into an embrace and kissed him lightly.

“I know that. Maybe it’s me that’s wrong. After all, I’m in the minority thinking they’re savable, aren’t I?” He leaned onto the wall with his forearms. “I’ve never mentioned my dad to you, have I?” he asked.

“No,” she replied. It was common courtesy not to ask about family since The Panic. Everyone had lost someone. Everyone had a horror story to tell.

“My dad, he was a great man. He taught me archery –”

“What’s archery?”

“Sorry. It’s what you call shooting arrows with a bow. We had a target in the back garden. He’d spend hours with me, practising. I didn’t even care about archery, I just loved being with him. He was so kind and patient. He was my hero. At the beginning of The Panic, he fell into a depression. Anyway, one thing led to another, and he ended up addicted to Croc.”

“I’m so sorry, Jude. I had no idea,” said Zuri, fingers pressing her temples. “I thought Trev and Lisa were your parents?”

“No. My dad walked out on us chasing Croc, and I’ve never seen him since. I'm pretty sure he’s dead. The last day I saw him, he was a walking corpse. My mum was beside herself with grief and anger. After Dad left, she got worse and worse and started drinking herself dumb.”

This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

“What happened to her?”

“About a year after Dad left, the riots were at their worst. One night, she ran out of wine and told me she was going to find more. It was a war zone outside. I begged her not to go.”

“What happened? She never came home?”

“No, she was out all night. The next morning, I took my dad’s bow and a few arrows, and I packed a bag with food and water. Then I went out to look for her. I was out in the riots all day. Reckon I was about eight or ten, and I barely ever left the house on my own. I checked every shop I knew, but no sign of her. When I got back home that night, she was there.”

A tear rolled down Jude’s cheek. “We don’t have to do this, Jude,” said Zuri, brushing the tear away and pecking his cheek.

“It’s ok. I need you to understand.”

“If you’re sure. So you got home and your mum was back. What did she say?”

Jude swallowed hard, took a deep breath, and composed himself. “Nothing. The front door was open when I got back. I walked in and called her. She wasn’t downstairs. I went up, called her again and again.” He gulped and took a deep breath. Zuri took his hand and stroked it. “When I got to the top of the stairs, I found her hanging through the loft hatch.”

Zuri gasped and pulled him in. She squeezed him tight and held him for a minute. “I don’t know what to say. There’s nothing I can say. I understand why the way I’ve been acting has upset you. I’m sorry.”

Jude nodded. He wanted to speak, but he could feel his lip quivering. He bowed his head.

“My mumma died last year. I didn’t get to say goodbye. She wasn’t even sick. One day she was there, and the next day…gone. My dad walked into my room and told me she was dead. He told me so matter-of-fact, as if he was telling me it was raining outside or he wanted me to fetch him a drink. I hate him for it. But at least the last time I saw her, she was smiling and we hugged. You didn’t get that, and I can only imagine the pain.”

He looked up, locked to her feline eyes, sincere in the dusk light. So beautiful. He smiled at her. He felt a weight lift. She could see him, and he knew she understood him. He felt safe. Not even Lisa knew how his mother died.

“I’ve thought about it every day since. My best guess is she got back wasted and saw I wasn’t there. There was food missing, and the bow was gone. She must have thought I’d walked out on her like my dad. I was all she had left.”

“Oh, Jude. You can’t blame yourself. No one can ever know what’s going through a person’s mind when they get to that point in their life.”

“Thanks for listening. I do blame myself. Think I always will. I'll carry the guilt with me forever.”

The two stood in reflective silence for a while until Jude finally spoke. “Shit! It’s getting dark. I’ve only got three birds and we’re late. Your dad’s going to feed me to Winston. We need to go right now,” he said, scooping up his bag and slinging his bow over his shoulders.

Jude scanned the sky. The sun was blood red and angry, only a few slots of it visible, fighting through sprawling clouds of thick iron. “It’s deadly after dark. You know that, don’t you, Zu?”

“I live in a shanty, not under a rock,” she replied with a tut. But Jude knew she would never have been out after dark. Her father wouldn’t allow it.

“We don’t have long. No stopping,” he said, moving into a lope and nudging her along.

“We best move, then, slow boy. See if you can keep up,” teased Zuri with a flash of her easy smile. But Jude could see that, behind her smile, she was deeply anxious, as the last of the cold daylight crept away.