I sleep.

I sleep and wake to Verkremond standing over me, and I sleep some more.

I wake to darkness, and murmur, "Heal," and when it does nothing I sleep again.

"Heal," I murmur when I wake to Verkremond's snores, and again when a distant owl's cry breaks my slumber.

[All available spell slots are filled. Please try again later.]

It's only the last time I wake, once dawn has begun to brighten the sky, that my spell finally unlocks.

"Heal."

Golden light surrounds me, restoring my health and erasing even the muted pains. Verkremond comes awake with a start, staring at me as though I'm an alien.

*DING!*

[Healer level increased! Keep up the good work.]

"Status, review."

[Class: Healer (7)]

[Profession: Cook]

[Bravery Bonus: +1 to most-used stat. (Currently: Resistance)]

[Active Quest: Retrieve Knife from Schang Cat. Time remaining: 1 day]

[Heal: Fixes anything wrong with the physical body.]

[Bless: Makes you harder to hit and helps you hit enemies.]

[Haste: Makes you move and perceive faster.]

[Needs Salt: Summons salt.]

[Open Slot: Unknown. (Cook)]

I'm about to cast Bless, then stop when something occurs to me. As far as I've found, there's no effective limit to spells-known, only spells-prepared.

Time to try something drastic. I'm fully prepared to be system-smited for it, but it's a new day and I feel great. I can heal myself and I want to get out of this madness and back to the wilds where I can punch dinosaurs and prehistoric cats in peace.

I dredge up my best guesses for 'how to win at everything' and start casting.

"Greater Ward!"

A steely-grey light bubble surrounds me briefly, physically pushing me away from the bed for a moment before collapsing to adhere perfectly to the shape of my body.

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One down, two to go.

"Internet Lookup!"

This one's trickier, and I would only give it a 50-50 chance of not triggering system retribution, but I'm careful to think of a recipe for venison stew, and to my delight the recipe appears in my mind as clearly as though I had a laptop in front of me.

"Summon Deep Fryer! "

I'm envisioning a cauldron of boiling oil, with a long-handled ladle for scooping things out of it, and... nothing happens. Guess I was also imagining throwing the hot oil into the eyes of Verkremond or anyone else who got in my way a bit too strongly, as opposed to envisioning frying dino steaks. I look away from my captor and focus very hard on food only.

"Internet lookup."

This time, it's a recipe for a nice chicken coating for deep frying, and it doesn't take long looking at the mental image of fried chicken to make me want an actual deep fryer, not just a weapon. I try to stay focused on the cauldron as a method for obtaining fried chicken - or something close to it - and repeat my attempted casting.

"Summon deep fryer."

Nothing. Maybe the system is onto me. Or maybe summoning something so big is outside its scope anyway.

"Internet lookup." I'm trying to focus on searching for smaller deep fryers, but Verkremond claps his hands loudly and breaks my train of thought. The spell fizzles, no mental shopping catalogue appearing. "Hey, what was that for?"

"You appear well! It is time to accomplish your quest. Come."

His tone of voice makes it clear refusal is not an option. And... well, for the moment our goals align: I want my knife back as much as he wants me to have a different quest to hand over.

I still don't know what's the deal with the restriction on transferring quests, or why my denial turned it from an 'available' quest to an 'active' one, but given how my time in this world so far has gone I'm not going to worry about it too much. It's a thing, and I'll have to live with it. That's all.

I follow Verkremond outside, and see the exterior of the village for the first time.

Okay... 'village' is giving it waaaaay too much credit. It's three houses, with a pig pen and fenced garden in the center. And by 'house' I mean 'mud-daub igloo-type thing'. And by 'fence' I mean 'someone stabbed a bunch of sticks into the ground and called it a day.'

"You know, I'm losing respect for you by the minute."

"I forgive your ignorance."

"No, really, man. When you first came at me I thought you were this big, scary hunter dude, but the fact that you're being ordered around by your mom, and your official healer is some kid who doesn't know a spell from a soup, not to mention your 'architecture' here... I have utterly lost whatever modicum of 'worthy opponent' regard I may once have held for you."

Verkremond's steps slow. "You speak very freely for a healer."

"I've been on this world a grand total of... what, 30 hours now? and in the course of this day and a half I've been assaulted by more than a few things that are honestly way scarier than you."

His grip on his spear tightens. "Why do you taunt me so? Are you dissatisfied with our arrangement? I could have killed you. It is by my mercy that you still draw the breath you use to make mockery of me."

"Yeah... that was probably a bad idea on your part."

He whirls to face me, nose flaring with barely-controlled rage. "What are you trying to do?"

"Mmmm, easy. I want your dinosaur."

His stance relaxes as confusion overtakes his face. "My... dino...saur?"

I wave a hand at said dino. "Big lizard mount. Snappy croc jaws. I want one. You have one. Ergo, I want yours. It's so much more convenient than trying to train my own. Not that I'm averse to hard work or anything, but when one is already packaged up for me I'd be an idiot to turn it down."

"You wish to rob me of my sylenkek?"

"Is that what they're called? Sheeesh, no wonder you're all so stuck in prehistoric times, you have to use stupid names like sylenkek."

The dinosaur in question raises its head and looks at us. Its eyes narrow, spotting me.

I wave cheerily, untroubled by its ire. "Hey, future mount. I know you hate me for the moment, but don't worry, I'll convince you otherwise real soon."

I turn back to Verkremond with a grin. "I have a theory I'd like to test. Greater ward." Steely light bubbles up around me, then shrinks down to cover my body. "But first, I'm going to kill you and steal your dinosaur. Nothing personal, you understand."

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