I zip my leather jacket and lift the hood of my thin hoodie, trying to warm myself from the cold fall night. It’s going to be a bitch finding somewhere to sleep tonight. Being 19, most hotels won’t dare let a homeless kid rent a room for the night.
Shelters in this area are all closed at this time or just a way to get your shit stolen. I’ll probably wander around until I find an abandoned house or something. I have less than half of my drugs left to sell, I’ll give the money to the boss, Kyle, he’ll give me my cut, and I’ll grab a snack from the gas station.
I keep myself hidden from the streetlights, hugging the wall of the dark alleyway as another addict walks nervously towards me. She’s a regular customer that I know has 4 kids, one of them around my age. I heard she even managed to go to some college around here. Despite their drug addicted mother, her kids are some of the smartest in the neighborhood.
“Uh, h-hey, Winter, are you working tonight?” The woman who’s name I don’t bother to remember, scratches her arm, constantly looking over her shoulder. I know she’s worried her daughter is going to show up, it wouldn’t be the first time.
“Aren’t I always? Just tell me what you want.” She looks around again, coming closer and I roll my eyes at her skittish behavior. I’d tell her to fuck off if it wasn’t so early in the morning. I’m ready to call it a night.
She finally gives me the money and I give her the drugs, before shooing her away, tucking my hands in my pocket. I wait until she’s far gone, check my surroundings before counting how much money she left. She gave me extra, it’s enough for me to call it quits tonight and have some drugs leftover.
I pick up my bag from the ground and start the cold 5 mile trek to Kyle’s house. The nipping hair dries out my throat as the temperature continues to drop and I struggle to keep my body from shivering. It’s late October and damn cold, it must be about to snow soon.
People are getting ready for Halloween and I can imagine the neighborhoods buzzing with kids dressed as characters begging for sweets. I can’t relate to those memories, my childhood was never filled with so much carelessness. Being 19, my window for trick-or-treating is long over.
I’m sure most people my age have some sort of party they’d go to. But, with no family and friends, I can’t relate to those party going teens. Unless you include getting fucked up at one of Kyle’s parties or clubs, full of killers, drug addicts, and whores. It takes me an hour to get to Kyle’s house and I hug my bag close to me as I’m escorted inside the warm house.
I ignore the naked women and overly excited men, walking into the drug and smoke filled house. The smell of weed and cocaine permeate the air, making it hard to breathe without feeling some sort of contact high. It’s nice and tempts me to stay…but I know better than to stay with Kyle.
I made that mistake once.
I go to Kyle’s office and knock on the door, waiting for permission to enter. I open the door and find the young kingpin, counting money with his 2 main bitches and right hand man, Travis. They’re both only 2 years older, but it’s obvious who’s in charge around here.
“Winter, how’d it go? You’re late.”
“Yeah sorry, I finished about an hour ago but the buses weren’t running, so I walked.”
“It’s cold as hell and didn’t I have you posted in the North that’s like 5 miles away.” Kyle looks impressed as always when it comes to me. But I know deep down he just wants me to become one of his hoes, but that’s never going to happen. We fucked once and that was more than enough for me.
“Damn it’s cold as hell and you walked here?” Travis asks as he smokes and rubs one of the bitches ass. He was another mistake I made, except it’s a mistake I can’t seem to stop making…
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Kyle doesn’t know and we both agreed that’s for the best. I simply give Kyle the money I made and the extra drugs I didn’t sell, ignoring both of their wandering eyes.
“A bitch overpaid” I explain as Kyle raises his brow before nodding and leaning back in his chair, licking his lips.
“How would you like to double your money?” Kyle asks as he counts the bundle of bills I handed over. Double the money is always nice, but I don’t trust Kyle to not try and fuck me over. He’s always shown interest in me. Ever since he found me on the streets and offered me a job.
“Doing what?” He smiles at my weariness as he hands me my money.
“A hit job, a friend needs a favor.” I try not to get my hands dirty. Shooting at someone already shooting at you is one thing, but killing someone unsuspecting, that’s territory I haven’t stepped into.
“I don’t think I’d be any good at that.” I’m better on my own.
“I’ve seen you on the frontlines, you’re a natural, just give it a try.” Kyle urges but I firmly shake my head, tucking my hands in my pockets. I live in the streets, I can;t very well rest knowing there’s a shooting frenzy happening. I don’t have a choice but to defend myself, protect the little I have and survive, but I’m no killer.
“I’m good.”
“You sure?” Kyle asks again and I nod, I just want to find a place to crash for the night.
“Alright, your loss. You got somewhere to stay tonight?” I nod even though it’s bullshit and we both know it. Travis eyes me with a silent offer, but I don’t look his way, we both know that’s always the last option.
“If you say so, here, take it” Kyle gives me the small bag of drugs that I didn’t sell and this, I don’t question. I take it gratefully, thankful for the impending distraction I have to look forward to.
“Thanks.”
“Yeah, get out of here and be careful it’s been hot out there.” I nod and thank them both again, before leaving the room. I’ve noticed the increase in police around the area. Probably because of the recent shootout we had with Kyle’s rivals. As one of the youngest drug dealers in the area, Kyle is always under attack. They’ll come after his resources and his workers, so we’ve all had to keep our guards up.
I leave the house and look around before leaving the neighborhood and heading to the nearest gas station. I buy a few snacks and a sandwich before heading towards the park. I eat in the cold, wondering where I can spend the night when a patrol car pulls up. A cop that I’ve had a few run-ins with over the years steps out, coming to sit next to me. She’s nice enough, I guess but a bit nosy. Officer Maria Bailey
“You’re working late, officer Bailey.”
“It’s cold out, Winter. Why aren’t you in one of those shelters I told you about?”
“I got kicked out” officer Bailey has made it a point to help me out for some reason unbeknownst to me. I think I’m just a pet project to this woman. I tried one of those shelters she told me about, and only stayed for a day. I found this old bitch going through my bags and kicked her ass. They threw me out for fighting after that and I never tried another. I’m better on my own. I’ve never been good with people. I’ve only had one friend and that was years ago.
“It’s cold out here, and it’s just going to get worse.”
“Yeah, I know” she doesn’t have to remind me. I’ve been homeless since I was 5 years old. I’ve faced a lot of winters, so this shit is nothing new.
“Unfortunately, the park is closed. I can’t have you stay here.”
“I was just taking a break to eat. I got somewhere to stay” I can always sneak into a building. All I need is a place without security systems or nosy neighbors.
“I hope this place isn’t one that belongs to Kyle Barker?” I continue to eat, ignoring her question. She’s arrested me for working with Kyle before and I even stayed in a detention center for a few months.
“It’s not” Bailey looks at me like she doesn’t believe me and opens her mouth to ask more when her radio goes off and she sighs standing.
“Get out of here and someplace warm, alright? Stay out of trouble, Winter” she heads to her car and I nod, not intending on listening as I finish my sandwich. I throw away my trash and head out of the park, looking for somewhere to go. It’s 1:30 in the morning and probably 25 degrees fahrenheit right now.
I wander around for another hour before finally finding an abandoned warehouse. I take out my gun as I slowly creep around the building. Hopefully there isn’t an alarm system. I bust open a window and wait for any sirens or alarms, not hearing any I go inside.
It looks like an abandoned car factory, there’s equipment, rusted and broken car parts and junk everywhere. I look around a little, finding a working bathroom, an old office, and an employee room with a kitchen that doesn’t work. It’s cold but warmer than outside and I settle into the large upstairs office since there’s a couch.
I lock the door, using a chair to block it and sit in the corner of the room, using the couch as a shield. I take out the smartphone I stole a while ago in my bag and hack into the surrounding Wifi. This is the closest I ever get to relaxing. Most of my days I’m hunting for money or doing work for Kyle. I put on a cartoon, taking out my snacks and drugs.
I wonder how long life will continue like this? I’m really close to asking what the hell the point is.