A rather unusual 23-year-old boy was sitting at the table in a large flat in a high-rise apartment in an affluent neighbourhood, thinking about his future. His name was Asmodeus, though he asked to be called Vasil. For him the name Vasil sounded more harmonious than the name of the demon of lust of Jewish mythology.

    The guy was the son of the wealthy Adelweinsteiner family, which was famous for its oil fields all over the country, something some countries might have envied. He was nothing special in a good way, as the above might suggest; he did not reject his parents' wealth, nor did he try to earn money, but only preferred to spend it on booze and luxury goods. His parents had no expectations of him, nor did they want to put the family business on his shoulders, since they knew: 'He doesn't need it'. People like that are usually described as being born with a silver spoon in their mouth. Surprisingly, his character was not the best either. He was lazy, proud, irascible, vindictive and stingy, what he liked to call avarice.

    And the icing on the cake was his memory, or rather his lack of it. He could talk to a person and in a minute forget what he was talking about and who that person was. You could say that his memory was like a high position in society: 'Now it's there, then it's gone. But more often than not, it was gone. Strangely enough, after drinking alcohol, his memory cleared up a bit.

    And so, sitting at a table with a bottle of whisky and cognac, Vasili was ordering food from the restaurant menu as usual, when suddenly an inscription appeared in front of him, so unexpectedly that he choked up.

*Do you want to change your life?*

* Yes / Yes *

    "What...? What the hell is this? I'm not drunk enough to see the writing in the air yet! And I'm sorry, maybe I'm missing something, but where's the 'no' option? I'm having a good time as it is!"

*Before the automatic agreement: 30 seconds left.*

    "Looks like I don't have a choice. What the hell am I agreeing to? Go to another world or what? Good God... Mum! Dad... No, this is too much, I'm not a little kid to call for Mummy in every situation! I'm going to face every hardship in the world on my ow..."

*3...2...1...*

    Suddenly, through the former noise of the restaurant and the rippling image in my eyes, I gradually began to distinguish someone's voice, which gradually displaced the reality of my... already past world? I couldn't believe it yet.

- Dear heroes, you have been called here to... - The elderly priest was busy talking about our sacred mission as the duty of called heroes from other worlds, although he did so with such exaltation that I had to interrupt his monologue:

- Hiya, I am terribly sorry to interrupt your important speech at which I am sure we will end up being obliged to do the thankless job of ridding your country of the evil that has emerged and is terrorising it, but, I stress BUT, I have one small question. Even if we imagine that the reality is as you preach and that you do need our help, why haven't you asked our opinion so far?

- Dear hero...you could have refused and the invitation would have gone to someone else instead... - in misunderstanding of the situation, the priest said with a slight note of indignation.

- Yes? And somehow my opinion was not asked! And now I'm here, instead of being in my real world, minding my own business - I spewed with anger. - Even more...!

- Stop it! - Shouted an unfamiliar girl who seemed to have been summoned as well. - First of all, do not shout, and secondly, you may not be correct in your statements, aren't you scared to shit yourself?

- Why am I wrong all of a sudden?! - I didn't understand that attack. Why would I be wrong if I was, you might say, called here by force!

- I had an option to refuse! - said the girl.

- So did I! - Shouted another "ally" with his voice in bass.

- Yes... yes! Ooh me too! - The girl, who looked about sixteen, said uncertainly in a low voice.

    "Damn it! The case will now go against me... The situation is so bad, I'm in an alien world (at that moment my brain pushed that thought to the edge of consciousness, otherwise I would have immediately become depressed) without any information about what surrounds me... I have to do something about it, otherwise I have a feeling that in the very near future is going to play a gambling game with me, where the chances of winning are minimal... I need to find a way to calm the situation down, otherwise I risk going to prison, I doubt there is any respect for human rights here." - So I did.

- Dear Sir, I bow my head to you for my impudence. You see, I had no choice to "refuse" to help a great country like yours, where it could very realistically have been handled without me. I hope this is enough for you to understand my situation.

- Hero, our Goddess can see that I have no grudge against you and am willing to forgive you - the holy man said suspiciously calmly.

    "He looks like some kind of goblin... A short, skinny, nasal, hunched over old man whose eyes didn't exactly say he was a believer and would do anything for his parishioners."

- If we're done arguing, I should explain to you what you were called to do, - he said at length, as if I had taken half a day from him instead of a few minutes, - our hero was absolutely right... After a thousand years of sleep, the ancient evil has awakened again, monsters began to surface and destroy the cities. Help His Majesty, no... all the people of our country to cope with this plague.

    "Basically as I expected."

- Good speech! What do we do now? Shall we go to the king? - I'm already wondering what this "servant of the people" looks like.

- Phew... No, you'll go to His Majesty tomorrow, but right now you need to be fed and rested, - he said as if he looked out into the universe, I was really hungry enough to eat an ox.

- Oh, that's right, fine, mind if I wanted to ask, what were the criteria for being called a hero? - Let's be honest, I didn't qualify as a hero.

- The hero had to be wise, just, judicious, generous... - why did he stop to look at me? Had he lost all fear? I'm better than any hero!

- My children bring me a prediction! It seems like I forgot about something.

    "Holy Jesus, fuck no! I know how it ends... Well, the scroll is small, at least it won't take an hour to read. Dying is dying".

- Right! At the appearance of evil... the summoning of three heroes... Wait, there's a catch, we've got an extra four! I knew it. There's no mention of a fourth hero. Please go to rest, dear heroes, and we must review all the divine writings about heroes.

    They led us through dozens of stone corridors to a "tiny" kitchen that was at least fifty square metres in size... Quite a space.

    Well... what can I say? The kitchen wasn't much... The cookware looked like it was a hundred years old and the oven was prehistoric, but the food "bloomed and smelled". The smell was amazing.

If you encounter this story on Amazon, note that it's taken without permission from the author. Report it.

- Let's maybe introduce ourselves, shall we? - came the surprising statement from the young lady who had embarrassed me a couple of dozen minutes before.

- Yup! Me first! - again this guy, he pisses me off just being here, - My name is Max, on Earth I was a soldier, mostly serving in the east of my country and...

    I'm too lazy to listen to his whole life story... What kind of soldier was he? He was twenty-four at the most, he could only have been in the army without any experience, boring.

- Well, I guess I'm second, - that young lady again, - my name is Alice, on Earth I was a doctor.

    "She was more of a pathologist, I'm sure she had people die at her hands... not a few."

- L-let me-I,- oh, the quiet girl said something, it's funny that she's so nervous, well, or it's just the way she is, - my name is Nastya, I haven't worked on Earth yet, I've just been studying...

    "Well, there's not much to go on, just a quiet schoolgirl. Oh, it's my turn now? So, let's introduce myself, haha."

- Well, my turn. My name is Asmodeus Adelweinsteiner, you can just call me Vasil, - I think some people recognise the last name, - I didn't work on Earth... let's be honest.

    Ooh... that's it, the looks of envy and hatred. Although... it doesn't matter now how much money I had in my "past life". I was more interested in their invitation, where I ALSO had an opt-out button (but I didn't, actually).

- So you guys are saying you could have said no?

- Yes, - said everyone as one except the silent one.

- I had it written: "Your actions have been appreciated by God, would you like to join in saving the world?" - said the girl pathologist.

    There is no limit to my surprise. There is simply no limit. What action has she taken? Has the cult of this goddess in our world been organized? Okay, I need to calm down... Oh, how the chick looked at me with her fried thighs... I'm not fooling around, I'm just hungry, like my great-great-grandfather on the holodomor. We're going to see "His Majesty" tomorrow, we'll have to show our best... But what disturbs me the most is that I don't think the fourth hero will get the red carpet, and he could be anyone. Anyone, meaning me, because I think it's pretty obvious that I'm not getting into this venture of my own volition.

- Guys, - "why are they turning so sharply, as if it were not me, but Stalin speaking in his commanding voice?" - Let's help each other with all our efforts in this difficult situation where some monster could die. I am sure that together we will be able to cope with this obstacle!

    Well, they were surprised... The important thing is that at least the lad and the pathologist agree. Quiet girl won't solve anything on her own, I don't think so.

- Vasil is right, - oh, the soldier is the first to reach out, - we have to act together to at least survive. Quite apart from saving the life of the country.

    The soldier knew something! Maybe he was just playing dumb? Right, never mind, either the pathologist is saying something now, or it's the end.

- I don't think Vasil is 100% right, we don't know what's in store for us yet, maybe it'll be an easy road! - Bitch... Jesus, why? Why do I have to go through all this trouble? She couldn't just go along with it, she started making herself out as if she could do anything... When has life ever been easy? Never!

    Girl... pick Uncle Vasya's side, you'll be like the sister I never had. I promise!

- Um, I-I think n-we should team up, like Asmoh-Bei said, - she tried her best to say that damn name, I don't blame you for anything.

    So 3:1, you snake! People are reaching for me, learn. Well, the soldier should be of at least minimal use, and the Quiet One - ... will rest.

- All right, let's wrap it up... Let's get some sleep before a hard day's work, - and we're all crowded around my buffet table as if we were resting in Turkey and not in the other world.

- I agree, we should get someone to take us to our rooms, - the soldier surprises and surprises.

- Yes, good night to you, - the pathologist was not asked, my supremacy, snake.

- S- good-night to you, - the girl tries, proud of her, as if she were my daughter.

   So, it's finally time to enjoy a bit of a nasty day... There wasn't much in the way of alcohol, but it might still come in handy. Wine... well, some kind of liquor... acceptable, some beer, some ale... That'll do! Basically, I can go rest now. It shouldn't be too hard to hide it all. How much of an asshole I am! Just kidding. Time to find someone to help me reach my room. The guardian should be fine for this.

- Deeply esteemed sir, tell me the way to the hero's choir, - at least some of the guards must appreciate my "piety".

- Dear hero, please follow me, - I don't know if he knelt in front of all the heroes, but I was pleased with that attitude.

    Hm, everything in the castle is too expensive-rich, it doesn't look like they're too afraid of this evil. There's portraits and just a picture of some river with naked maidens... It's a long walk, this is what I call a giant castle.

- Your chamber, hero, - he said with such respect that I wanted to offer him to stay.

- Guardian, I am pleased to communicate with you, maybe we could have a rest with a bottle of fermented wine? - Maybe I'll steal the king's guard away, hehe, bad boy.

- Mr. Hero, I thank you very much, but unfortunately I can't. His Majesty has always been against the consumption of alcohol by the guards, even on weekends

    And the king's a bit of a prick. Why so strict? At work - understandable, but not on a well-deserved day off...

- Guardian, let's see, it's not every day that heroes arrive from the other world to save this one. What's not an excuse? And I don't think the king would mind if a hero asked for a drink with a guardian as a gift from the kingdom. I won't persuade you, whatever you say, that's the way it is.

    The guardian took a piece of silence to thing over about it, and finally made up his mind:

- You know, Mr. Hero... I agree. I haven't had a drink in over ten years. - Wow, how old is he now? He looks about forty years old, and he must be very strong if he wears that armor...

- Please enter my chambers, Mr. Guardian, - I am amused that this was my first time entering there as well, - have a seat.

    The room was luxurious... A huge, warm carpet on the floor that made me take my shoes off. A window with an amazing view of the evening sky. Expensive bed, table, chair and wardrobe. A little empty for such a huge room.

- You may take off your armour, you can rest, you've been dragging that great armour about all day, - well, we must decide what to eat now, there's nothing to eat, - let me run to the kitchen while you make yourself comfortable!

    I think he was about to say something, only I ran out in search of some kind of kosher. So... it's if we turned left, then we go left, then a portrait of a king or something. That's a lot of rooms... Maybe I should ask the guard who's been watching me this whole time.

- Dear Sir, could you tell me where the kitchen is? - I squeezed out all the politeness I could muster.

- The kitchen's round the back, - he said, pointing behind me.

    Well, I was stupid, it happens...

- Yes, Mr. Hero, - did I say that out loud? No, like... Maybe it's a wizard who can read minds...

- Mr. Hero, I could see it all on your face - I can see through his helmet that he's smiling through all his thirty-two teeth right now. He's joking at me! You, you...

- Goodbye, store room guardian, - I can't hit him, but at least I want to try to mock him.

    Why the hell did he pick up his spear?! AHHHHHH!

- Guardian, put the spear down, I take it all back! I know judo, I don't...

- Serve His Majesty, the sun of the continent! - What's he doing? Is someone behind me? I heard someone's loud "whoo-hoo" behind me, I'm scared.

- Guards! For what reason is it so loud? Is it because of that peasant? How did you let him in here in the first place? - I didn't understand the hit... ah, it's our beloved, precious King, as I see it. Now I have to get out of shitty situation again, great.

- Your Majesty, I apologize for... - he interrupted me! What on earth does he think he's doing?

- Guards! Seize the peasant! - he shouted so loudly that my eardrum almost cracked again. I have to do something!

- I am a hero! The future savior of your world, Your Majesty. I know you are "The precious King of all the country", but I am the saviour of this country! - How painful it is to fall to your knees... This sniveling man started wondering, shall I see it as a victory?...

- A hero? What are you doing in the corridors of the castle at this late hour? - Oh marvel, the king almost killed me, and now he asks what I'm doing here.

- Your Majesty, I was looking for the kitchen to get a snack... food, so I approached the guard to ask where it was... And here you are.

    Silence.

- Well, now I see. Guardian, bring food to the hero's chambers, and you, hero go to the room and wait, - and I thought he was going to kill me for approaching the guard... Wait.

- Your Majesty, I'm terribly sorry, but where are my chambers? - Seriously, I forgot where I came from.

- Get the hero out of my sight! - I don't see what I've done to you, snivel. - Hero, you and I will meet again in... today at your class definition.

- Thank you, please forgive me for disturbing your sleep, - he was freaking out at all, making me the culprit.

    "Store room guardian" led me down narrow corridors, so here I am finally in my chamber. But wait, I don't see the previous sentinel...

- Guardsman, are you here? - He must have escaped...

- Yes Mr. Hero, it's just that I heard the king yelling and was already thinking of jumping out the window, - he somehow said it too seriously, but I still can't see him...

- Come out, I can't see you.

    He went out the window in the room... Quite a serious man. I could even see a note of fear in his eyes. Is it so bad?

- Mr. Hero, what happened to you? Why did I hear the king shouting? - I wish I knew why he was so angry with me...

- There was an embarrassment with an absurd situation, but it doesn't matter, let me pour you a drink! - At last we'll have a quiet drink.

    So... where are the shot glasses? No shot glasses... Fuck, this is the end of my patience. Let's do it already!

- We're not little anymore, let's drink from the throat! Would you like wine, liquor or ale

- Ale, please. I haven't drank it in over 20 years.

- And I'll have my Chardonnay semisweet, - I saw a misunderstanding in his eyes, - wine, wine, wine.

- Ah... and 'chardonnay semi-sweet' is a word from your world?

- Yes, yes, it is! Well, may the coc... oh, may the king serve well! - almost said the best toast of his time.

- Good toast! - with an enthusiastic smile, said the comrade guardian.