The girl woke up with a start. Her whole world seemed... unusual, a bit colder. The ground was feeling different, not the familiar straw bed. That explained the coolness, or was it freshness? She felt the wind! She almost shouted it out loud. Calm down silly girl, you have been drugged, you are probably dreaming again. Her body was not hurting so much for one thing, and the strange hunger was gone. Surely a delusion then, she concluded. But the girl remembered. She did! She opened her eyes and screamed.

"I HAVE A BROTHER!"

She sat up in excitement, and almost lost her mind at the view. Or maybe she already had. It was a town, no a whole city! It was night time but she could make out the shape of houses and also lights. So many lights! Where was she, the girl wondered, and how...

"I know, ya told me 'bout it a hundred times already!" A voice startled her. "Damn if 'tis not borin', been sayin' the same thing over and over for an hour! Then ya fell asleep, and now ya wake up and ya start this shit again..." It was a male voice, coming from her side and close, quite improperly so. She recoiled and scrambled to her feet in a scare. Something stopped her short, pulling her from the waist. She cried out in surprise before falling back.

"Would ya please calm the heck down?" The man snapped, as he grabbed a rope that was coiled around her belly.

She assessed her current situation. She had somehow gotten out of her cursed room and was tied up in an unknown location. The girl felt excited. She should not be, really, but it was an improvement over her previous condition. Perhaps it was, she amended. She looked at her benefactor, or captor, it was still to be determined. But she could not see much in the dark, only his shape. He was sitting down a few paces away, glaring at her.

"Who are you?" She had so many questions but one had to start somewhere, this one seemed appropriate.

"Ya talk?" He asked, sounding surprised.

The girl rolled her eyes. It was going to be a painful, long conversation if the man was this slow-witted.

"Yes, as you can hear, I am capable of speech." She said, very slowly, with the tone normally used to speak yo small children.

His response startled her, for he decided to burst out laughing. The man must not be very bright, she concluded. She sighed. Well, communication was off the table then. So she put herself back to analyzing her situation. The most unsettling thing, -appart from her being captive by an idiotic man- was how she felt. There was no pain nor strange hunger anymore, and she could remember the last couple of days quite distinctly. She felt relieved and began to look around.

She was sitting high up, on a tiled roof. The city felt familiar but it was difficult to tell in the middle of the night. Not much else to see but lights and shapes, those were houses and streets. The girl could make out a group of lights that seemed higher than the rest. There was also a dark, vast and completely flat area surrounding the town from all directions. Then she recognized it all, the uphill district, the sea and the swamps. This should be Gravelroy, the free city. Metropolis full of various merchants, cultures, and criminals. She vaguely recalled visiting it on a few occasions.

"Sorry fer that, 'is jus' ya been actin' all cracked for an hour or so. And now ya wake up, and ya talk to me like I'm the crazy one." The man said once he had finished laughing.

Perhaps she had been too quick to judge him. He was certainly capable of speech, however limited it was. The girl turned her gaze to him, she could see better now. The man had short, dark blond hair. There was not enough light to make out the color of his eyes nor that of his clothes. God, his garments were dirty! He was covered in filth from shoulder to toe. Did he bathe in a pool of mud earlier this day? How was she to know in wich ways commoners spent their time anyway? She shrugged and went back to her inspection. His age was hard to guess, she estimated him to be in his mid-twenties, though the scars on his face made him look older. The smile was not going to fool her, he certainly was a shady individual. No one respectable would be standing on a roof at such late hour. His questionable habit of abducting young women was not raising her opinion of him.

"Lookin' down at me while covered in your own filth, ya sure are somethin'." He said, catching her stare. Did the man read her mind she wondered, frowning. No, that would be unlikely. The girl should be more careful with her facial expressions, she scolded herself. The irritating laughter came back when her face twisted again in frustration. 

"You should take a look at yourself before being so rude. I do not believe you are much better off than myself on the matter of cleanness." She shot back. She was not going to let him bully her without a fight. The scoundrel looked down at himself and winced in agreement.

"You have yet to answer my previous question." She remarked, using his discomfort as an opportunity.

"Oh, right. I'm Ben."

She sighed again. It was going to be an ordeal, conversation was not his forte. He had said his name as if it explained everything. Only a first name, she noted, no family name. Either the man did not want to disclose it or he was an unwanted child. Orphans and bastards did not get one. As if their status was not low enough, she remarked. The both of them were now staring at each other, waiting. The girl was not going to lose at this, she thought smugly. She had been practicing against walls for quite some time.

"That's where ya give me yer name, y'know." He finally added. -Oh, right. I really am out of practice with social interactions.- 

"I... " She paused. "I do not know in fact, it appears I cannot recall my identity." She answered, shocked by her own ignorance.

How could one not remember their own name? The girl sorted through her few memories. She recollected being called 'sister' mostly, with a few occurrences of 'daughter' and 'my lady'. Her family name was there as well, for it had always been important. She thought back on all the writings in her chamber, the answer could be in them. The miscreant was now giving her a strange expression, concern? She must be wrong. He should really consider a change in career, the girl observed. Kidnapping people only to feel sorry for them afterward did not seem very efficient. But then again, what was making sense these past few days?

"Ya don't seem to recall me either." He broke the silence.

"Ben, right? Am I supposed to know you, Ben?" She asked, surprised. "My apologies but I cannot remember much, it seems." The girl was doubtful, she could not be acquainted with such a suspicious person, could she not? And if they knew each other, how to explain the rope then?

"No worries now, jus' saw each other the once. Plus was enough damn smoke in yer room to make half the city go mad. Heck, I'm surprised ya can talk at all." He waved off her apology.

"It might be because there has not been any of the medicine left available for a few days." She explained. "There was a case of theft or so I heard."

"Well, that'd be my fault." He said with a mischievous grin. She perked up in realization.

He was the thief, the one who the white priests have been looking for. The scoundrel that framed her, she thought angrily. On the other hand, she would not have gotten her mind back without his intervention, however criminal it had been. She could not decide if she had to thank him or resent him. The abduction was a little irritating though. The girl has been locked up in the same room for God knows how long, and now she was only a length of rope away from freedom. She tried moving a bit and discovered how weak her body was. Ben perked up and tightened his grip on the rope as soon as she did. His smile did not fool her, he was watchful. 

"What d'ya remember?" He asked. Well, nothing in there was worth hiding so she answered:

"Only a few bits and pieces, my childhood mostly."

"M'ybe I can help ya with that." He said after thinking a little. Surely a noteworthy occurrence, she noted, but she kept the remark to herself.

This Ben had offered her help recalling her past, she paused, startled. It was her most immediate concern, even before freedom. Escaping only to wander aimlessly afterward was meaningless. But what would he ask for such help? This ruffian was holding everything she wanted in his hands, the price should surely be steep. She swallowed a lump in her throat as she considered the kind of payment would interest his like.

"Don't remember yer full name, it's kinda long 'n complicated. Starts with Clept or somethin'. Let's call you Cleo for now a'right?"

She froze. A name, even just a part of it, sounded astonishing. It made her feel a bit more human. And he was handing it to her for free?

"What? Ya don't like it? I think it's nice. M'ybe Chloe then? Sound about the same. Can't go too much different from yer real name though, can't we?"

"No, please, Cleo is fine. No, not fine, It's wonderful. Thank you. Ben. Thank you." She blurted. She was babbling like an idiot, she scolded herself. Tryly embarrassing.

" 'Is jus' a name." He shrugged.

"By what means do you know about me? What else is there? What do you want from me?" Heavens, she was doing it again. She acted the part of the excited young maiden before her first dance. The girl really had to control herself. Next thing she knew, she would be swooning. How distasteful. Heavens, the thief was laughing at her now. She was feeling the heat coming to her cheeks. Oh god. Please do not blush.

"Mae said it's kinda famous story in these parts. Don't remember the whole thing, and I sure as hell can't tell it good the way she does. L'me see..." He appeared thoughtful for a while.

The expectation was killing her. What was it about storytellers and their infuriating habit to pause for effect?

"Tis' mostly rumors and folks talkin', so take it with a grain of salt a'right? Anyway they say, since the accident, the first one I mean, ya spent 'bout four years in the loonie bin. Other folks say ya died that day." He paused when he saw her expression. "The house for crazies." He explained as he pointed at the tiles under his feet. Oh. So she hadn't escaped, she was only on the roof, she thought, disappointed. But four years in this horrible place? And she only remembered a few days of it? It was horrifying, she had wasted most of her youth drugged and scribbling madly on walls.

"Mae says ya got wed as soon as ya were of age, the big commotion happened a year later. Reckon' it would make you twenty-one or twenty-two? Though I hones' coudn't tell with the way you look and all. That would be the accident, the second one. Been rumors of you bein' a ghost after." He continued. She was a woman, not a girl anymore, she noted. But this was far from the most concerning point.

"Hold on for a moment, please, I am married? And you mentioned an accident, what happened?" She almost screamed at him.

"Ya got married off to some lord. Don't ask me his name, 'tis another of those long-ass ones ya nobles got. Then the war started because of it, or thanks to it, depends on whose side yer on I guess. Yer brother has been doing real well during the whole thing, by the way. Famous general I hear, conquered a whole kingdom. Polkiad I think its called, and some other bits. I met him actually. Tall lad, looks at ya like yer not good enough to lick the mud on his shoes. Got nothin' personal against him though, most of 'em Lords look at ya this way. Funny thing is, with him you actually believe you're shit when he stares. There's somethin' special about him. I guess that's why folks in the empire say he's a hero. Folks on the other side call him different kinds of names though. Not names I should say in front of a lady. Shit, I just remembered yer a lady. Shoudn't probably say shit either." He stopped in his ramblings.

This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

God this Ben was an execrable storyteller. There was no method, he just mixed facts and random thoughts together, before blurting everything out at once. She had to sort everything out now. She held her hand out, signaling him to stop. She took a deep breath. First, the marriage issue. Well, she could not remember the man's face. Surely her husband should not be of much relevance then, should he not? It did not give her much hope about his character though. Probably nothing noteworthy, she concluded. She realized with bitterness that her precious household name was not hers anymore. Cleo shook her head, she should focus on the truly important topic.

"Is my brother alive then?" She asked, holding her breath for the answer.

"Dunno fer sure, but I haven't heard of him getin' put in the ground." He shrugged.

She felt relieved. He had apparently become a renowned general, and such personalities passing usually made quite a commotion. 

"You said you knew him, do you work for him?" She asked hopefully. He was busy with some war, so obviously he could not come to her rescue. She remembered him always putting duty above everything. But of course, a man of his status could send someone to rescue his sister. 

"Ah, sorry. Don't know him much. Was jus' the guy shoutin' orders at our arses. When I was a soldier with'em Empire folks, that was. Jus' saw him a few times is all."

She was disappointed, but not so much. Brother was doing well and the news alone was cheering her up. She turned her attention to the other pieces of information. She was noble, according. The girl had not wondered about her station before, but she was glad for it to be important. 

"You said you were a soldier with the empire. For what reason did you abduct one of your own countrymen then?" She asked. She had to address the matter at some point, and her captor was being helpful at the moment. It seemed as good a time as any to try.

"Damn! Ya think I frigin' kidnaped you?" He exclaimed. But he didn't make any move to free her.

"It would be a valid assumption under the circumstances, do you not think?" She shot back

"Made sense at the time." He shrugged. She raised an eyebrow.

"Found ya lyin' down, yer head held in both hands and mutterin' 'I have a brother', ' I have a brother'." He said, imitating her. "Figured I should take ya out for fresh air, the place bein' filled up with smoke and all. Then I thought: maybe bringin' a crazy girl up on a roof is a bad idea. So I tied up yer ass." He concluded. The explanation made sense, if you ignored the rudeness.

"This means you would untie me if you determine that I am sane?" She asked. How would she prove her sanity to him though? She was far from convinced herself.

"Well, I ain't goin' to spend my life walkin' around with a cracked girl on a leash ain't I?" He said before laughing.

The man was infuriating. She could not make any sense of his demeanor. He was suspicious and either lying or hiding things. If he was a drug thief then what did he free her for? But if he was a soldier from her country, why did he steal weeds and not her self the first time he came by? What were they still doing on the roof of her prison? And now the scoundrel was throwing jokes at her. The most frustrating part was that she felt a measure of gratitude towards her captor. She shook her head. She was exhausted, and there was still so many things left to figure out.

"I do not know if I am sound of mind. I probably am not, not after spending four years breathing drugs in a cell. But the definition of sanity always depends on who judges it. With that I mean, there are people who believe the whole world was created by a god in less than a week. How is this not completely absurd? Others believe in as many as twelve gods, one for thunder, war, wine and so on. Does it not sound mad? God, most people out there even think the earth to be flat!" She exclaimed, getting worked up. She stopped herself short when seeing Ben's face. Heavens, why did she let herself get carried away? Now he was looking at her as if she had grown even crazier.

"Are ya sayin' god don't exist? Damn, but everyone say he do! Did I pray to wind the whole time? Would explain some things though. Wait, I jus' heard you swear his name. I can see why they say you're mad." He rambled.

"Well, swearing might be one of the very few topics in wich you are more educated than I am." She said. Ben snorted in response. "If I may add, 'Oh god.' might the only bit of swearing a lady can get away with."

"Careful 'bout what ya say though, 'seen what they do to them heretics and it ain't pretty. Plus ya live in a goddamn church!" Ben exclaimed. She nodded in agreement, questioning faith was perhaps not a safe thing to do out loud then.

"And what was that 'bout the world? Seems pretty flat to me." He frowned, before looking around as if testing the idea.

"It is actually a sphere or a ball if you prefer." She explained and instantly regretted it. She recalled having the conversation dozens of times, as well as the headaches that ensued.

"Wouldn't it go rollin' around then? We'd end up crushed against the floor. Wait, is there a floor? There has to be one right? What about the people at the bottom, they can't get rain on them now can't they? ..." He blurted out and kept going. She sighed and stopped listening. She should have known better, Ben seemed to be the worst person to explain astronomy to.

"Let us change topics, shall we? You mentioned an accident. Could you tell me about it?" She asked and thanked her non-existing god when Ben stopped in his ramblings.

"Damn! Ya don't know? How's it even possible? I mean, whole thing is... well, take a good half yer head. Some folks say ya died that day, others speak of yer ghost hauntin' the loonie bin." He said, growing uncomfortable.

The girl touched her face with her hand. She had noticed some parts of its skin were feeling rough or strange, but she had overlooked it. She was filthy, bruised, and she had not been thinking clearly at the time. Now, as she was examining it more thoroughly, she was growing anxious. She looked around her, but she could not find anything in wich to see her reflexion. So she glanced at Ben in askance, fearing what she would hear.

"Hm..." He cleared his throat. "It's burnt skin. Black and all, takes the whole right side of yer face. I've seen it a few times durin' the war, though it was on corpses. Oh, err... sorry."

Not only her sanity had been damaged, but her appearance as well. She had half a mind to match with the half of her face, she remarked the sad irony. What had happened to her? She had so many memories as a happy child, how could her life have come to that point? God, she was crying now, truly disgraceful. A strange observation. She was crazy, filthy, she apparently looked like a corpse, and she was worried about the propriety of tears. She felt Ben's hand resting on her shoulder in an attempt of comfort. What was the saying? 'Once you hit rock bottom, there is only a one way : upwards.' What an absurd proverb. One could obviously keep digging, even through rock.

They sat in silence, each purposely avoiding to look at the other. She must have stopped crying at some point. She surprised herself finding the presence of Ben, sitting a few paces away, somehow comforting.

"Ya know, ya can tie yer hair and put it all on one side. Is' long enough, shoud cover the whole thing." He said after a while. She considered the idea. That would work, but it did not make her feel better.

"And if folks are botherin' ya, jus' switch it the other side to scare them off." He proposed. She gave him a dubious look.

"Worked on me the first once. Ran away, scared shitless. Thought yer some kind of ghost." He gave a small, encouraging chuckle. She ignored it.

"Gotta use what ya got right?" She shrugged at his proposal. He grew quiet in defeat.

The dark of the night was beginning to disperse. With it came the question she felt too tired to address: what was she to do now?

"Dawn is coming, folks willl sure check yer cell soon." He observed. She nodded absent-mindedly.

"Could help ya get away." He said and it startled her.

"And lead me around on a leash?" She shot back with more venom than she wanted.

"Sorry, jus' thought wasn't safe to untie the thing. On the count of yer cryin' and all."

"I would not jump off in despair. I am not such a pitiful..." She stopped short when he gave her his end of the rope, just like that.

"D'ya know anyone who could take you in? Guess not with yer memory problems." The girl shook her head as she untied her bonds.

"I'd offer but Mae's place pretty cramped and ya'd have to go outside when she got customers. Also, ain't a proper place for a lady I'd say." He continued.

Who was that person named Mae? Ben had already mentioned her earlier. Well, the girl had more pressing concerns. She was tempted by the offer, but then anything sppealed to her more than going back to the cursed room. What was she going to do afterwards? Would the white robes search the city for her? She had just discovered she had one of the most notable faces from miles away. Though returning to her cell would mean more drugs and the risk of forgetting everything she had learned. Not to mention she could revert to drooling at all times. She was at loss. The girl needed more time to process everything and get better.

"Your offer is tempting but there are things I need to remember, things I hope to find on the walls of my cell."

"But if they bring ya more drugs, ya'd go back to full cracked right?" He objected. She gave a worried nod.

"I have to return soon, or they will take notice of my absence." The girl said as she stood up shakily.

"I'll lock the door right behind ya then. L'me lead the way." He commanded and she followed in silence.

The walk to her room felt eerie. It was a new scenery after all, everything that was not her cell was refreshing. As they went down the bell tower's stairs she realized she did not dread going back as much as she would have thought. Perhaps the familiarity of a room she spent four years in was comforting after an overwhelming night. They paused at the bottom and Ben made a rude shushing gesture before going through a door. She trailed behind and they resumed their way, into a dusty attic this time. She watched curiously how he proceeded. She had never seen anything like the way he walked. But then she was a Lady, and Ladies certainly did not know many thieves.

The young man was treading through the darkness in a strange fashion. He was bending down, sometimes stopping to shift his weight suddenly, before making an uncanny step in a different direction. As if he was probing the wooden floor with his feet, discovering wich planks would squeak, and then planning his route accordingly. Her own feet were bare she found as she tried following his weird ways, not wanting to make noise either. It proved to be a difficult endeavor.

The moves reminded her of dancing and she recalled hating it. Not very Lady-like but she had deemed the whole business tedious at best, and she had never seen the point in it. Her body's current condition was not helping. Apparently, imprisoning her and drugging her was not enough. The white-robbed people had to starve her as well. Not the most pious of conducts, she remarked acidly.

After a short flight of stairs, they went down to the inmates' floor. Ben put a scarf over his face and the girl imitated him as best as she could, pulling up her robe to cover both nose and mouth. She was showing too much leg, she noted, but who was looking, really? She watched wide-eyed, as she discovered her comrades in insanity for the first time. Or they could have met before but she could not remember.

They were wearing the same gray dirty robes, and their demeanor was making her shudder. Some of the human forms were shaking or having violent spasms. Others were hurting their own selves in disturbing ways. She could not make out their faces but she was too afraid to have a closer look. Did she used to have such a ghastly appearance? She felt sick thinking about it. Ben urged her forward, pulling her out of her morbid fascination. He pushed open her cell's door before stepping aside. She was glad to notice the contraption hanging from the ceiling had ran out of drugs. She went in, turned back to bid Ben farewell and then paused, wondering wich words to use. What did one say to someone -no matter how irritating- who saved them twice from insanity?

"You have my utmost gratitude, Ben. I cannot begin to contemplate what state I would find myself in if you had not rescued me tonight." She bowed slightly.

It was a lie, she just saw said state in the cells right next to hers, it had been terrifying. Ben nodded, accepting her thanks. The girl was beginning to regret coming back here. Was she being foolish, throwing away her only chance at escape in four years? Why was Brother not here, and a criminal was the one to offer her freedom? Why could she not accept it? Surely life in poverty could not be much worse than all this. She did not know much ways to earn a living, but if tens of thousands of commoners could do it, why should she not?

She did not trust Ben, though he had not done her real wrong. He actually has been the only person of any help and she had turned it away. What a stupid, silly girl she was. God, she was shaking again, the tears were returning now. She glanced at her walls. Was there anything amongst these mad scribblings worth the agony she faced? How many times had she managed to remember bits and pieces of her past and then written them down, only to forget? How many times had she done so, before starting the cycle anew? Ben coughed, shaking her out from her stupor.

"Is it proper fer ya ladies to accept visits from us criminal types? Say tomorrow evenin'." He asked with a grin. Did he read her thoughts? Heavens, she wanted to hug him. She wanted to throw propriety out the window and do it, but she controlled herself. Who would want to be embraced by a corpse? Not a very smart move if she ever wanted him to come back.

"It would definitely not be proper. One Should have to keep it a secret or face a rather unseemly reputation." The girl could not ward off her smile as she answered. There was hope, if only for a single more day of sanity.

"See ya then, same time, and not too crazy if ya woud." He winked before throwing her his scarf and closing the door.

It was a long way from rock bottom to the surface, she thought as she caught it, but she was beginning to look up. She tightened her grip on the piece cloth with resolve.