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33) Sarah Smiles, er, schemes

Sarah Smiles

Second Sarah, as she was known to Declan, went to her room. She was exhausted and drained from helping her friend learn how to become a better destroyer of worlds. She had done everything that she could to encourage him and advised him whenever she thought that he needed a good prodding.

That was not the part that had drained her. No, she was tired for a completely secondary reason. She could feel that Declan was growing more and more attached to her. That she was quickly becoming a surrogate for his lost love she had no doubt; in fact, she was beginning to think of herself as Surrogate Sarah, the replacement chick, and it bothered her. It wasn’t that she didn’t have very strong feelings for Declan. He looked just like her best friend, even acted like him for the most part, but there were small variances and then there was one rather big difference between the man she had known and the one she knew now.

She actually appreciated the little variations in the new Declan, she honestly felt like he was a better man than the one that she had known. It was the massive divide between the two that bothered her. The old Declan had been gay. Just like her. She picked up her cat, Whiskerbiscuit, and began to stroke him. He purred gently and pushed his head against her hand indicating that he wanted a head scratch. She used to joke to her Declan that her pussy got very cross if she didn’t stroke it at least twice a day; so she obliged him and continued her train of thought.

She couldn’t stand the thought of breaking New Declan’s heart. He had come to her right after his Sarah had died, and even though he had been nothing but a gentleman she could tell that if she showed even the slightest interest in him then he would try to pursue a new relationship with her.

It killed her that she couldn’t reciprocate. No matter how much she wished that she could she realized that she just couldn’t live out that lie. It had been her Declan that had made her face the truth about her sexual orientation in the first place and had convinced her to finally be herself. He had seen the truth in her that she had never been able to admit to her own self. He had held her hand as she took her tentative steps into accepting who she was.

She had lived that lie too long, and now that she had thrown off that oppressive yoke; the one that she had worn for so many years, she had no intention of ever putting it back on. Not for him, not for anybody. Sarah stared out of her window into the lush forest outside. Declan had said that he was going to fill it with animals, and she had put in a request for raccoons. She loved them. Sarah had a pet raccoon as a child; it had died when she entered her teens, but she cherished her memories of the scruffy little bastard. She didn’t think she’d want to live on a world that didn’t have trash pandas in it. As if reading her thoughts Whiskerbiscuit meowed and pushed his head against her hand once more. The cat demanded more strokes and scratches. She began to tickle his chin lightly, sighed, and turned her thoughts back to Declan.

She knew how deeply he felt about his Sarah, Prime Sarah as she thought she’d heard him refer to her, and there was no way that she’d be able to fill those shoes. Even if she only pretended to be what he needed for his sake she knew it would never be enough for him. She saw how deeply he cared for her alternate. She watched him die a little every time he thought of her. He had saved her life, but she could not restructure her whole lifestyle to make him happy.

Her mind wandered into other ways to help him. She might be able to set him up with another girl from the Sarah pool. It was getting big enough. She considered her options. Crowe was nice, and she was obviously attracted to Declan, but her time on her dying world had broken her and she was slightly insane. Declan did not need more crazy in his life. Essea was not even a potential candidate. Even if she could reproduce, which she wondered about, the woman was extremely analytical over being emotional. Half her brain was a computer after all. She was an organic A.I. in a cybernetic body. She doubted that Deck would even be attracted to her, and she seemed extremely asexual to start with, but who could tell. Maybe Declan charged her circuits in ways that she didn’t even notice. Countess, as they had taken to calling the living vampire, had guessed that Essea’s people grew their babies in labs and added mechanical parts as they got older.

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Rah, the bad-assed bunny that she was, was smoking hot and smoldering too, but Sarah didn’t know if Declan would even consider a Beastion as a possible mate. She was all hopped up on the thought of mating and making babies. Declan was still a virgin and didn’t plan on having sex until he was married. Sarah doubted that no matter how much fun Rah would present to less morally encumbered males that Declan would not appreciate the position she would put him in or the numerous positions that she’d want to try out with him. Satisfied with her attention, the cat leaped from her arms and landed silently on the floor. He stalked from the room with a haughty attitude that only cats can pull off and vanished around a corner.

She had tried to tell Declan that conventional thinking, such as the concept of marriage, was no longer an option for the inhabitants of Terra Sarah. There were no governmental or religious institutions that could legally bind anyone in holy matrimony. To his credit, the man had stuck to his guns. He felt that he had waited this long and that if he never knew love again then he would never need to know carnal pleasure. He’d rather never have sex than have it with someone that he didn’t love or didn’t love him. He was so frustrating! Every other man in the cosmultiverse would jump at the chance to had sex with somebody they were even just slightly attracted to. She began pacing the room, hands behind her back. I need a coffee, she thought.

So, by her reasoning, if Rah was out so was Sarahtaur. She just didn’t see him ever mounting her horse half no matter how much he grew to love her. She also doubted that he would be able to satisfy the centaur in any meaningful way down there. Parts is parts after all, and fair is fair. Why should Sarahtaur go her whole life sexually frustrated? No matter how well-endowed the human Declan might be, she doubted he would ever compare to Declantaur. Out of the current batch of girls that just left Countess, Surrogate Sarah (herself), Vegan Sarah, Silent Sarah, Triggered Sarah, and Conservative Sarah. She just could not see him devoting himself to someone who needed blood as sixty percent of her daily diet to survive. Countess was lovely, but she had the eyes of a predator, and the Surrogate her would always wonder if she hadn’t just set a banquet table for her alternate self. She really had no desire to make Declan into a sacrificial dinner lamb.

Silent Sarah had proven to be more awesome than a mime had the right to be, but how could you connect to someone that communicated by pretending to pull a rope that wasn’t there? No, they really had nothing in common. Vegan Sarah was . . . well, annoying. Everything revolved around vegetables and her inability to eat meat. On top of that, she was a Crossfit trainer who also had Mother upload aerobics instructor information into her head.

The political Sarah’s never stopped fighting or arguing among themselves, and they demanded that their positions be heard. That was why she had shunted them off about three miles away from everyone else. The place was huge, and they needed the space between them. If they got too close they would badger you to reveal your stance on things like abortion and immigration, and even though they were told that neither of those topics had any relevance to their lives anymore it didn’t seem to matter to them. Sarah suspected that in a few weeks they would have opposing viewpoints on what kind of soap you should use in the shower, or what was proper baths or showers. Declan didn’t deserve the hell they would put him through.

She ran her fingers through her hair in exasperation. If she was right on the way that she saw the others then she was certain that Declan would too. It was scary how well she knew the man. She had known him for years but had only met him a short time ago.

That meant that she was right back where she started; as the sole object available for his affection. She had a target on her back and right now that little bastard Cupid was aiming at its bullseye. She laughed suddenly at the realization that with an infinite amount of worlds potentially existing that somewhere out there, in the vastness of multi-space and time, there really was a Cupid. That struck her as hilarious. She wiped a tear from her eye and flopped onto a comfortable cushioned chair. She would, she decided to have to do something to help Declan. She was going to have to find him the perfect woman.